Guest Post: Sir’s Favorite Toy

Note from Kate: I don’t normally publish guest posts here, but my Sir wanted to contribute a review of a toy he loves, and he’s rather handsome and persuasive so I said yes. Here’s the review; enjoy!

“Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.” –William Morris

There are around a dozen different sex toys in the small drawer of my nightstand: prostate massagers, vibrators, cock rings, and sleeves. They’ve all been carefully selected and collected over time to be both beautiful and useful and to make me come in intense and interesting ways. But I want to tell you about my favorite. My favorite toy is so versatile that ever since I first tried it, I’ve used it more than anything else in my collection.

I started using it in December and haven’t gone a day since then without thinking about it. Most nights, I curl up on my couch or in my bed and it’s the first thing I reach for. It’s become a prized possession: something I long for, treasure, and take care of so that it will last me a long time. With proper attention and maintenance, there’s no reason why I wouldn’t be able to play with this little toy for years to come.

Like the ones made by the defunct Fucking Sculptures, this toy is one-of-a-kind. It sometimes feels as though it’s been designed and built exactly for me. It fits my body, engages my imagination, and pings my kinks so perfectly that I sometimes wonder if I special-ordered it during a late-night shopping spree and then promptly forgot about it until it showed up in New York one random Wednesday afternoon.

Imagine a warm, smooth, beautiful, self-cleaning plaything that has three different holes you can fuck with your cock (or a strap-on), your fingers, or even another toy. Imagine a toy that looks and smells and tastes as delicious as it feels against your skin. Each hole on the body of the toy is shaped and textured differently with some that are tighter or deeper, so there’s always one that fits my mood. Because of its clever ergonomics, it’s also possible to use more than one at once if I’m feeling extra dexterous. While I sometimes use lube while I’m playing with my toy, it’s not always necessary as it gets pretty wet all on its own if I touch it just right.

The toy is of course body-safe, it doesn’t need batteries or cords, and I can play with it even when I’m not in the same room via my phone. I can thrust into it hard and deep for as long as I want, or if I’m in the mood, I can set it up and let it suck or stroke me just the way I like. My toy comes with a detailed manual and pretty packaging, it can simulate the feeling of a cunt squeezing and coming all over my cock, and almost never fails to respond to my commands, especially when I remember to push all of the right buttons.

I’ve come harder and for longer than I even thought possible while I was fucking my toy on a recent trip to Toronto, and when I’ve brought it with me to fancy hotels while staycationing in my own city. I’ve had weekends of relaxing, debaucherous fun away from the stresses of daily life fucking my toy late into the night, then waking up at 4AM and desperately needing to use it again. One of these days I’m gonna get my whole fist inside it, but more testing is required before I review that particular feature.

I’d love to recommend that you buy this toy at one of the many fine women-owned sex toy retailers online, but the truth is, you can’t. This toy is mine and was generously and freely given to me by someone who loves me. I hope you find one just like it because it makes me incredibly happy to own something so good.

Oh right, I forgot to tell you what it’s called. I think technically it’s named Kate, but I call it my little one.