Review: Jimmyjane Hello Touch

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I don’t know how to feel about Jimmyjane. Their Form 2 is one of my favorite vibrators ever, but I hated their Iconic Rabbit. I enjoy their elegant, minimalist designs and marketing, but at the same time, they can be really pretentious sometimes.

Their newest release is the Hello Touch, a duo of tiny vibrators that you strap onto your fingers and operate via a control panel embedded in an accompanying wristband. It pretty much straddles that line between Jimmyjane’s great qualities and its annoying ones.

This review is a hard one for me to write, because the Hello Touch is marketed as a couples’ toy, so both my opinion and my boyfriend’s should be reflected in the review – and we disagree on this toy.

I like the Hello Touch’s aesthetic – it reminds me of iPod earphones and those armbands that athletic folks tuck their iPods into – but my boyfriend says he thinks it’s ugly and tacky-looking.

The finger-bands fit my fingers fine, but on my boyfriend, they’re uncomfortably tight. His fingertips were literally purple after using the Hello Touch for 20 minutes or so, and I don’t think he has freakishly big hands for a man. (I don’t know what his ring size is, but mine is 6, if that helps you at all.)

Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but: the Hello Touch is not powerful. It’s marketed as being three times as strong as any other fingertip vibrator, and that may well be true, but fingertip vibrators are infamously weak. Furthermore, it has only one speed, which is a dealbreaker for many women – including me, usually.

The Hello Touch runs on two AAAA batteries (who the fuck has AAAA batteries just lying around their house, by the way? Not me!), but it’s not much stronger than your typical watch battery bullet. You have to keep in mind, though, that the Hello Touch is not the kind of vibrator you just set down on your clit and leave it there til you come; the vibrations are meant to enhance the stimulation already being provided by fingers, which explains why they’re not that strong on their own.

The wristband is comfortable, stretchy, and has a compartment for the vibrator’s battery pack, on which the on and off buttons are located. This would be a great design, except for the fact that the buttons are impossible to push through the fabric of the wristband. Seriously, you have to press down soooo hard to get the vibe to turn on – and I know it’s not just due to me being a weakling, because my boyfriend had the same trouble. Every time, we’ve had to take the battery pack out of the wristband compartment and turn it on that way, which ruins the intended convenience of the wristband system.

With all that said, though, I actually enjoy the way the Hello Touch feels. My boyfriend is great at fingering, but it’s not usually enough stimulation to get me off, so the vibrations are a welcome addition.

You can wear the little vibrators on your fingerpads for maximum power, or you can flip ‘em around to the backs of your fingers, so that your fingertips themselves will vibrate. I like that last way better, both when masturbating and when having my boyf use the toy on me. It just feels… cool.

My man feels very strongly that the Hello Touch messes up his fingering mojo. He says he can’t really feel what he’s doing when the vibrators are strapped to his fingers, both because of the physical presence of the vibrators and because his fingertips go numb within minutes. However, I never noticed his performance suffering from the Hello Touch getting in the way.

At $65, the Hello Touch is one of Jimmyjane’s cheaper offerings, but even that seems a bit steep for a one-speed fingertip vibrator. It offers some pleasant sensations and makes for fun partner play, but I don’t know if the pleasure it brings me is really worth that much.