Anonymous asked: Do you have any recommendations for whips/cuffs/other kinky stuff?
I know you sent me this question a while ago, dear anon, and I’ve been mulling it over. After seeing Tristan Taormino’s new film about kink for couples (review coming soon!), I feel newly inspired to answer this question.
The first place you should look is Tantus’ sensation section. While known more for their dildos than their sensation-play toys, Tantus recently came out with a line of paddles that deserve your attention.
I have the Wham Bam and it is divine. It flops around a little bit, but not too much, and it delivers a hell of a thwack. If you want something smaller and more concentrated, I’d recommend the Pelt. Best of all, each Tantus paddle is made out of 100% body-safe silicone, so it can be boiled to sterilize, meaning you can share it between multiple partners without fear or risk.
If you want something less intense (and less pricey), a bamboo paddle could be pretty good, though I think that’s more for beginners than the Tantus ones.
I only have one pair of nipple clamps, these Spartacus ones, and they are very painful. I am too much of a wimp to even fully affix them to my nipples, in fact. But if you have tougher nipples than mine and/or are experienced with clamps, you might enjoy ‘em.
Lelo makes a beautiful Sensua flogger with a substantial, grippy handle and a suede business end. It’s small, so it’s probably best for beginner masochists (or for tucking into your purse in case you suddenly crave a good whipping while out in public somewhere!). If you want a whip that’s longer and more functional, Pipedream makes one that doubles as a glass dildo. Amazing.
For cuffs, I generally recommend leather ones because I find they’re the most comfortable (and the sexiest!). There are some nice ones by Allure. Also check out anything and everything by Aslan Leather – some of their products are even vegan (faux leather)!
If you want to restrain someone without spending a lot, it’s hard to go wrong with bondage tape.
A Wartenburg wheel is a cool way to ease into pain play if it’s something you haven’t tried much before. My friend used one of these things on my arm today and I just thought it felt prickly and strange, but I know lots of folks are into ’em. They have a kind of a medical fetish vibe.
Finally, if you’re looking for a ball gag, I gotta recommend Tantus again. Many ball gags are made of rubber, the smell and taste of which I find disgusting; I can only imagine this effect would be compounded if I was being gagged by a big rubber ball. For that reason, I think silicone ball gags are the way to go. Tantus has a non-representational gag in a few different colors, or you can get a gag shaped like the head of a penis.
This isn’t advanced kinkster stuff, for the most part, but I think it’s a pretty good starter kit for anyone who wants to explore BDSM! (Don’t get the Fifty Shades collection, please, for heaven’s sake.)
Got a question you want me to answer on my blog? Get in touch!