pressure wave technology

Review: Lovense Fizz clitoral stimulator

Kate Sloan

What is the Lovense Fizz?

While I love me a good dildo or G-spot vibrator, I’m a clit girl at heart. Like most people with my anatomy, I only get off when there’s clitoral stimulation involved. So I’m always intrigued to test innovative new clit toys, particularly ones engineered by companies I adore.

Naturally, then, I was delighted when Lovense asked me to try their new clit stimulator, the Fizz. It’s a dual-headed toy: one side offers a “tapping” sensation, akin to an actual fingertip tapping quickly on your clit, while the other side offers a more standard “suction”/pressure-wave sensation, meant to mimic oral sex.

As with Lovense’s other toys, the Fizz can be controlled remotely via the Lovense app for iOS/Android, including by long-distance partners.

“Tapping” side

Things I like about the Lovense Fizz:

  • Tapping & sucking: Both of this toy’s functions feel great (especially with a generous helping of water-based lube) and stimulate the clit differently from your standard clitoral vibrator.
    • The tapping side feels almost like a partner’s very speedy fingers, and oscillates visibly back and forth, creating a deep, firm rumble I can feel throughout my clit. It reminds me of my beloved Hot Octopuss Pulse Queen, only smaller/more pinpointed. I like that I can move it around as needed, stimulating the top, sides, or tip of my clit. I can get off with this side consistently and easily.
    • The suction side is a bit intense for me at times, but that’s true of pretty much all of these pressure-wave/air-pulse toys (Womanizers, Satisfyers, etc.) – they stimulate the tip of my clit in a way that can be overwhelming and sometimes makes me come faster than I mean to, resulting in a subpar orgasm. That being said, this toy’s air-pulse stimulation is the kind I like best, on the rare occasions when I crave it: rumbly/low-pitched, steady, and dispensed through a large, soft “mouth” (of which more later). I can consistently get off with this side; it just takes me a long time because of how overstimulating pressure-waves can feel to me.
  • Strong: Both sides of the Fizz have a wide range of intensities and get impressively strong when you turn ’em up. I never had any doubt that I’d be able to reach orgasm with this toy, and mostly stayed within the lower half of the toy’s range to do so. (For reference, I usually get off on the first or second speed of the Magic Wand Rechargeable.)
  • Good variety of speeds/modes: The Fizz has 8 vibration speeds + 4 vibration patterns, and that’s before you factor in the Lovense app, which gives you even more control (more on that later). I’m thrilled that Lovense decided to give this toy so many vibration speeds, as I’ve sometimes found the jumps between speeds to be too jarring in previous toys of theirs that only had 3-5 pre-programmed speeds.
  • Larger nozzle: I tend to prefer pressure-wave toys with a larger “mouth” than average, because my clit is pretty sensitive and prefers indirect stimulation. The bigger a toy’s nozzle is, the more of my clitoral shaft it can encompass, creating a fuller-bodied sensation by stimulating more than just the hyper-sensitive tip of my clit. The diameter of the Fizz’s mouth is about half an inch, and while it can’t engulf my entire clitoral shaft + hood the way the wide-mouthed Lelo Sila can, it covers enough of my clit to give me deep, satisfying orgasms. I don’t think the Fizz’s mouth is quite big enough to fit especially large clits, though, including those of transmasculine people with bottom growth – I’d still tend to recommend the Sila for those folks.
  • App-controllability: Lovense is known for their excellent smartphone app and how it pairs seamlessly with their toys, allowing you to control your own toy – or a far-away partner’s – using your phone. You can create your own patterns, sync the toy up to music/sound, or just freely control it via sensual touchscreen swiping. I’m particularly excited to try out this toy’s long-distance capabilities the next time I’m away from my partners, because they both go down on me a lot when we’re physically together but there aren’t many long-distance toy options for replicating cunnilingus. This toy’s suction functionality feels just close enough to a human mouth (particularly when its silky-soft silicone “lips” are warm and well-lubed) that I think we’d have a wonderful time using this during phone sex.
  • Great buttons: Buttons are an oft-underrated aspect of sex toy design, but they can make a huge difference in a toy’s usability, as anyone who’s ever used a vibrator under the covers in the dark can tell you! The Fizz has a “plus” button and a “minus” button, the former of which doubles as its power button (you hold down “+” for 3 seconds to turn the toy on or off). The two buttons are of a different enough size and shape that I can easily tell them apart without looking at them, even in the heat of the moment.
    • Afterglow: A small detail about this toy that makes a big difference: when you hold down the “minus” button to quickly lower the intensity (such as when you’re super sensitive immediately after an orgasm), it will go all the way down to the lowest setting, but it will not turn off – you would need to hold down the “plus” button to do that, since it doubles as the power button. In practice, this means that I’ll come, get sensitive, dial back the intensity, and be able to ride out the aftershocks for as long as they go on, rather than shutting the vibrator off completely in my hurry to turn it down. Ultimately this makes my orgasms with the Fizz longer-lasting and more satisfying than they would otherwise be.
  • Lightweight & ergonomic: The Fizz weighs just 125 grams, about a quarter of a pound, so holding it never causes me discomfort, even on a bad hand pain day. Its lightness also makes it much easier for me to flip back and forth between the two sides of the toy, which I’ll often do many times throughout a session, alternating between tapping and sucking.
  • Waterproof: I’m so glad that the Fizz is IPX7 waterproof, because I love using it in the bath. There’s something so relaxing about having my clit gently tapped and sucked while I lounge in warm water…

Things I don’t like about the Lovense Fizz:

  • Loud: The Fizz’s main flaw is that it’s quite noisy – and oddly, it’s even louder in-use than when you’re just holding it in your hand. The tapping function takes on a sonic quality that reminds me of an electric lawnmower (albeit not nearly as loud), while the sucking function sounds more like a purring jaguar in heat. I wouldn’t recommend this toy for anyone who needs to keep the noise level low when they jerk off for whatever reason.
  • Only one nozzle size: Some pressure-wave toys come with multiple nozzle sizes to fit different clit sizes, like genital AirPods. (I just Googled and no one has ever used that phrase before, lmao.) The Fizz only has the one size. It’s big enough to fit a decent range of clit sizes, but might not form a seal as well around particularly small clits, and (like I said above) likely wouldn’t work for large clits, including testosterone-enhanced ones. (I’d love to see Lovense make a super wide-mouthed pressure-wave toy like the Lelo Sila someday, and/or a remotely-controllable clit pump, if such a thing could be engineered to be safe!)
Lovense Fizz (hot pink) vs. Lovense Tenera (pale pink-to-blue gradient)

Lovense Fizz vs. Lovense Tenera 2

In trying the Fizz side-by-side against Lovense’s other pressure-wave toy, the Tenera 2, overall I prefer the Fizz. The Tenera’s mouth is wider but shallower, so it doesn’t encompass as much of my clit. Both toys have similarly rumbly pressure-waves that my clit really enjoys, but the Tenera weakens/slows down a bit under pressure, whereas the Fizz just keeps on truckin’. I also find the Tenera less ergonomic because its buttons are located toward the tip of the toy, rather than on the handle, so I have to reach farther whenever I want to change the setting.

Granted, the Tenera is much quieter than the Fizz, and I prefer its soft, friendly, ombré aesthetic over the Fizz’s more utilitarian design, which makes me think of ear thermometers. But with all the above benefits + the fact that the Fizz is cheaper (at $119 versus $129), I definitely prefer the Fizz.

Final thoughts

I’m glad that Lovense has added such an impressively versatile and effective clit stimulator to their lineup! I’ve really enjoyed testing the Fizz, even though I’m not always the biggest fan of pressure-wave sensations. It’s cool to have two different clitoral sensation options to choose from, and to be able to seamlessly switch between them at will.

While I wish it wasn’t quite so loud, that’s really the only major beef I have with the Fizz. Aside from that one thing, I love it, and am so excited to use it long-distance. This toy is yet another example of how Lovense puts tons of care and effort into designing their products, and I hope it makes a lot of clits happy!

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Chalovelo Lipsip pressure-wave stimulator

Kate Sloan

What is the Chalovelo Lipsip?

I am a femme, known for both wearing lipstick and writing about lipstick’s sexual applications – so it always catches my eye when sex toy companies make products that look like lipstick!

I’ve tried a few vibrators along these lines, the best of which is the Lovense Exomoon – but the Chalovelo Lipsip is different, because it’s a pressure-wave simulator, not a vibrator. That means it stimulates the clitoris with rhythmic air waves, creating a sensation that’s somewhere between tapping and mild suction. Let’s see if it performed as well as my favorite lipsticks do…

Things I like about the Chalovelo Lipsip:

  • Multiple attachments: The Lipsip comes with 3 different attachments: one for small-to-medium-sized clits (0.43″ diameter), one for medium-to-slightly-larger clits (0.55″ diameter), and one that is angled (0.51″ diameter). It’s great to have options for this type of toy, because clitoral size and shape are so variable. The better a pressure-wave toy fits your clit, the better it can form a seal, which allows these toys to stimulate you in the way they do. (I wouldn’t recommend this one for folks with large and/or testosterone-enhanced clits, though, unless you want a toy that mainly just focuses on the tip and not the shaft.)
  • 7 intensity settings: While the Lipsip’s website claims it has 9 intensity settings, it actually has 7 intensity settings followed by 3 patterns. However, even 7 is impressive for a toy at this price point ($50), and I appreciate the huge variance between the first setting’s low-and-slow tickle and the highest setting’s buzzier thumping. This toy could be a good option for people who have found other pressure-wave toys too intense, because this one starts out very mild and builds up from there.
  • Rumbly/thumpy: The quality/timbre of these pressure-waves is pleasantly low-pitched, so it stimulates my clit in a way that feels more full-bodied (and thus more enjoyable) than some other pressure-wave toys at this price point. It can feel really good, especially when I’m already turned on by the time I start using the Lipsip.
  • Low battery indicator: It’s rare for toys at this price point to have a way of notifying you when their battery is low, but it’s a crucial feature for avoiding ruined orgasms, IMO, so I appreciate that the Lipsip has one! (Its battery lasts about 1 hour on a charge, by the way, which is okay but not great.)
Size comparison with an actual lipstick (Cherry Lush by Tom Ford, my MVP)

Things I don’t like about the Chalovelo Lipsip:

  • Not strong enough: I repeatedly tried to get off with this toy, and it just wasn’t strong enough to get me there. It felt okay-to-good most of the time I was using it; it just didn’t have the chutzpah I needed, ultimately. This was made even more frustrating by this next drawback…
  • Patterns: Once you reach the Lipsip’s highest speed, clicking its one button again will switch to a rhythmic pattern. But there’s no way to know when you’ve reached the highest speed (and, as I just described, it isn’t even all that high), so it would be all too easy to ruin your orgasm by hitting the button at a crucial moment. Toy designers, I beg of you, make patterns accessible only via their own separate button, or don’t include them at all, please!
  • Lipstick-inspired design: Look, it’s a cute idea, and could theoretically make this product more discreet – if not for the fact that it’s about 50% bigger than an actual tube of lipstick, so only the most cosmetically inexperienced onlookers would ever mistake it for an actual makeup product. The “lipstick cap” could’ve been a useful innovation for keeping out dust/dirt when you travel with the toy, except that the cap pops off at the slightest provocation (unlike most real lipstick caps, which take their protective duties seriously!).
  • Not waterproof: The Lipsip is IPX6 water-resistant, so you can wash it in the sink or use it in the shower, but shouldn’t submerge it in water. I gotta ding this toy for not being waterproof because I love to use pressure-wave toys in the bath, and always wish I could!
  • Noisy: On its highest setting, the Lipsip would be audible (albeit faintly) through a closed door. Most of its settings would certainly be audible to someone who was in the same room as you.

Final thoughts

As a femme and a comedy fan, I enjoy the Chalovelo Lipsip‘s commitment to the bit – that “bit” being its resemblance to a tube of lipstick. That said, I’m not sure this is the ideal form factor for a pressure-wave toy – and if you’re gonna make a product with a removable cap on it, please ensure the cap will stay on when the toy is riding around in my pocket/purse!

Gotta say, though, I admire Chalovelo’s decision to include three different attachments with this toy, especially at a $50 price point (which is fairly low for a pressure-wave toy). It’s always lovely to see a sex toy company thoughtfully accounting for the broad range of bodies out there. To that end, I also love that the Lipsip starts low and slow, for those of us who like to increase stimulation gently and gradually throughout a session. Its pressure-waves also feel delightfully thumpy/low-pitched, in relation to some other comparable pressure-wave toys; my clit approves.

My clit is, however, less thrilled about this toy just not being strong enough to make me come. (Today I whipped out my Pulse Queen to finish the job, if you must know!) I also wish it had more than one button, to reduce the risk of ruined orgasms when you inadvertently switch from steady speeds into patterns. But if you’re shopping for a beginner-friendly pressure-wave toy on a budget, you could do worse than the sleek, chic Lipsip. Like a beautiful babe in a bold lip, or a sucker-punch right in the kisser, the Lipsip might just make you weak in the knees.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Funzze Pink “O” Clitoral Sucker

Kate Sloan

My preferences for clit-sucker toys are so specific, I can usually tell if I’ll like one just by looking at it. And as soon as I saw the Funzze Pink “O” Clitoral Sucker, I figured it would get along well with my clit – and I was correct about that.

(Don’t you wish it worked that way with human clit-suckers, too? Like gaydar but for pussy-eating skills… I’m sure my adventures on Tinder in my twenties would have been a lot more satisfying if I had cunnilingual clairvoyance!)

What is the Funzze Pink “O” Clitoral Sucker?

This cute little toy uses air-pulse technology, also known as pressure-wave technology, to stimulate the clit with rhythmic waves of air. While companies often refer to these toys as clit-suckers, they don’t actually apply suction in the way that something like a clit pump does – but some people describe them as feeling like oral sex nonetheless.

This Funzze air-pulse toy is made of silicone and ABS plastic, retails for $33.99, and runs for about an hour on an hour-long charge.

Things I like about the Funzze Pink “O” Clitoral Sucker:

  • It can get me off, no problem! To me, this toy’s air waves feel more like rumbly vibration that surrounds the tip of my clit. They’re low-pitched enough that I can feel them both on the surface of my skin and more deeply in the internally-buried parts of my clit. This leads to orgasms that are intense, deep, and fully felt – unlike orgasms from the buzzy vibration or weak pressure waves found on many other toys at this price point. I actually said “Whoa” out loud after coming with this toy for the first time, because I was that surprised 😂
  • The reason I requested this toy to review is that it has a larger mouth than most other toys in its category, a quality my clit tends to prefer. The hole has a diameter of 1.4 cm, or just over half an inch. That’s nearly as big as the mouth of my beloved Lelo Sila – although the Funzze toy’s mouth is only about 1.1 cm (0.43″) deep, versus the Sila’s mouth depth of 1.5 cm (0.59″), so I wouldn’t recommend this Funzze toy for anyone who has a large clit or who wants their whole clitoral shaft stimulated. The Sila is still better for those cases, albeit wayyyy more expensive.
  • This toy’s mouth has softly rounded silicone edges, which makes it comfortable to use and allows it to maintain a better seal around my clit, even if I writhe around a little during a session. (Always use lube – ideally a water-based formula – with pressure-wave toys, by the way! They feel a lot better and are less prone to causing irritation that way.)
  • It won’t be to everyone’s tastes, but I like this toy’s lovecore-y aesthetic! The heart-shaped button is cute, and I appreciate that it’s made of grippy silicone, while the rest of the toy’s body is made of glossy ABS plastic, so the button is easy to locate by feel and to keep a good grip on, even with lubey fingers.
  • At just 3.6″ tall by 2″ wide, this toy is petite and therefore arguably travel-friendly; it doesn’t have a travel-lock function, but it does come with a drawstring storage bag for travel.
  • It only costs $34! Honestly pretty rare for a toy at that price point to make me come 😆

Things I don’t like about the Funzze Pink “O” Clitoral Sucker:

  • This toy has 8 settings, with just one button to cycle through all of them – and bafflingly, the settings are 2 steady speeds followed by 6 annoyingly inconsistent patterns. The patterns could be good if you love tease & denial, but personally, I mostly reach for sex toys when I want satisfaction, not frustration! Those of us who prefer steady speeds (which is most users) generally appreciate having more than just 2 to choose from – especially since this toy starts off fairly intense, so I have to get myself turned on using my hand (or another toy) before I’ll be able to enjoy this one.
  • Like most pressure-wave toys, this one’s mouth is sized such that it’ll only focus on the tip of your clit, if your clit is medium-to-large. I prefer indirect clitoral stimulation so I usually prefer to use these toys through my clitoral hood, which, to be fair, is entirely doable with this toy.
  • This toy is louder than I was expecting, for how petite it is. Even when its mouth is full of clit, it makes a somewhat grating buzzing noise, albeit one that likely couldn’t be heard through a closed door.
  • I think this toy is slightly too bulky, depth-wise, to fit well between bodies in the missionary position (whether for PIV or strap-on sex). You could manage it with an adapted position that allows for slightly more space between your pelvises.
  • Confusingly, the toy’s product page says it’s fully waterproof, while its manual and product specs say it’s only splashproof. (I suspect this may be the result of poor A.I. translation, as is common these days, but who knows.) In any case, I wish this toy was fully waterproof as its webpage claims, because I like using clit stimulators in the bath sometimes.

Final thoughts

I am always on the lookout for pressure-wave toys at an affordable price point, because many people want to try them, but (reasonably!) don’t want to drop $150+ on a really nice one when they don’t even know if they’ll enjoy the sensation. To that end, I’m glad that the Funzze Pink “O” Clitoral Sucker only costs $34, because that means that more people get to access the pleasures of this type of toy!

That being said, only having two steady speeds is a pretty big flaw, since most users prefer them (according to various informal Twitter polls that I and my colleagues have run over the years, anyway). This toy’s noise level also makes it tough to recommend for anyone who needs utmost discretion or just prefers quieter toys.

But I can’t deny that this toy brings me to some sharply intense orgasms. Its laser-focused clitoral directness isn’t always what I’m in the mood for – but it’s a sweet, cute, ultra-portable little mouth that can make me come and only costs $34, and I think that’s pretty neat.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Hello Nancy Avo clitoral massager

Kate Sloan

Two things which we millennials apparently love, at least if the press releases in my inbox are to be believed: avocados, and pressure-wave sex toys.

I’m certainly not beating those allegations; I use pressure-wave toys semi-regularly, and I’m one of the many millennials who eats avocado toast but doesn’t own a house. (Hmm, doesn’t it seem like, if wages had kept up with inflation, more of us could comfortably afford both, and no one would have to write shamey thinkpieces about it? 🤔 Ah well…)

Anyway, economy gripes aside, today I’m reviewing a toy that combines both these millennial staples into one green little gadget: the Hello Nancy Avo clitoral massager. Like their lemon-shaped Lem, which I reviewed yesterday, this toy is cute, unusual-looking, and surprisingly powerful for its petite size. It’s so similar to the Lem, in fact, that I’m going to compare the two throughout this piece.

Ways in which the Avo and Lem are more-or-less the same:

  • Both are pressure-wave clitoral massagers, meaning they stimulate the tip of the clitoris with rhythmic air waves.
  • Both are made of matte, smooth silicone.
  • Both have 10 modes/settings, although the modes themselves are different (more on that below).
  • Both have a soft-edged silicone “mouth” that is just under half an inch in diameter, so they’re best-suited for people with small-to-medium clits (and I wouldn’t recommend them for people who’ve experienced bottom growth due to testosterone).
  • Both are IPX7 waterproof, so you can wash ’em in the sink and use ’em in the shower or bath if you want to.
  • Both come in totally adorable packaging, with a silky pink storage bag for the toy.

Ways in which the Avo is better than the Lem:

  • I like the avocado-y shape, and found it easier to hold onto than the lemon shape, even with my chronically sore hands. I also found that the avocado shape stayed in place better when I’d briefly use it hands-free (like while finding more porn clips to watch on my phone), which is a definite plus for me.
  • Additionally, I think this shape would be better suited for using during PIV sex than the rounder Lem. The Avo could even fit into missionary-position sex without much trouble. It’s about the same size as something like a Satisfyer Penguin, but shaped even better to fit between bodies.
  • The Avo feels noticeably more powerful than the Lem, so it may be better appreciated by people who enjoy intense stimulation. That being said, its pressure waves feel buzzier than those of the Lem – more on that below – so it’s ultimately less pleasurable for me, despite being stronger.
  • The lowest speed of the Avo is actually low, unlike the Lem which starts off a bit aggressive for my liking. I appreciate being able to start at a lower intensity and work my way up as I get more aroused (although this would be easier to do if there were more steady speeds; see below).
  • I tend to stick with steady speeds rather than patterns, but the patterns on the Avo are significantly better than the patterns on the Lem. There’s less space in between pulses, and the rhythms are more consistent. People who enjoy patterns might actually like these!

Ways in which the Lem is better than the Avo:

  • Most crucially: the Lem’s pressure-waves feel a lot rumblier and more clitorally impactful than the Avo’s. My clit just kind of zones out/numbs out after a few minutes with the Avo, whereas the Lem feels engagingly rumbly through all of its settings. For this reason, I was able to reach orgasm with the Lem but not with the Avo.
  • The Lem has 4 steady speeds and 6 patterns, whereas the Avo has only 3 steady speeds, followed by 7 patterns. I’m not sure of the reason for this difference, but in any case, 3-4 steady speeds is not enough gradation for me; my preference is 8-10.
  • The Lem ($89 USD/$120 CAD) is cheaper than the Avo ($99 USD/$140 CAD), although I’m not sure why – and frankly, I think both are a bit overpriced. Pressure-wave toys at this price point usually have flashier features to justify their high cost, like Womanizer’s “Autopilot mode” or the multiple different-sized clitoral attachments that come with some Womanizer toys.
  • Despite being repeatedly described by the brand as “whisper-quiet,” the Avo is one of the louder pressure-wave toys I’ve tried. The Lem is a much more reasonable volume by comparison.
  • The Lem lasts 2 hours on a 90-minute charge, whereas the Avo only lasts 90 minutes on a 90-minute charge.

Final thoughts

In general, I think the sunny yellow Lem is the better toy of the two. It feels better, can get me off, and its aesthetic appeals to me more. The higher-pitched “buzziness” of the Avo‘s pressure-waves will work for some people, but I think most folks would dig the Lem more.

In general I struggle to say that Hello Nancy’s toys are worth the splurge, since they don’t quite deliver sensation-wise in the way I’d expect for a pressure-wave toy at this price point – but as I noted in yesterday’s review, sometimes a toy’s aesthetic makes it worth the extra cash. Sex toys are meant to bring you pleasure, and many people find it easier to seek and justify self-pleasure if they’re using a toy with an aesthetic that makes their heart sing. Maybe some of my fellow avocado-obsessed millennials are swooning over the Avo as they read this!

As for me, though… I think I’ll keep my avocados on my toast, and not on my vulva. 🥑😉

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Hello Nancy Lem clitoral massager

Kate Sloan

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. And when life gives you a lemon-shaped vibrator, you… squirt? I dunno. We’ll workshop the tagline.

This is the Lem clitoral massager by Hello Nancy, and its sweet-‘n’-sour aesthetic impressed me right out of the box – but did it have the juice I needed? Let’s discuss…

What is the Hello Nancy Lem?

This toy massages your clit with rhythmic air waves, just like Womanizers, Satisfyers, and their ilk. It has 4 steady speeds and 6 patterns. It’s made of silicone, and lasts about 2 hours on a 90-minute charge.

Oh yeah, and it’s shaped like a lemon, which is fun.

Things I like about the Hello Nancy Lem:

  • The pressure waves this toy produces are impressively rumbly, strong, and pleasurable! I enjoy them a lot, when the toy’s nozzle is positioned on my clitoral hood (more on that below). They build arousal quickly for me, and they stay rumbly-feeling even as I get more turned on and increase the intensity. I was able to reach orgasm easily and consistently with this toy, with or without additional penetrative stimulation like a dildo or butt plug.
  • The Lem’s nozzle has soft, rounded, flexible silicone edges that are comfortable in use and allow it to form a good seal around my clit, which can nonetheless be easily broken when I want to reposition the toy.
  • I wasn’t sure how I would feel about the lemon shape in use, but it works better than I thought: the silicone has enough grippiness that I can keep ahold of it even when my hands are a bit lubey, and I can place a fingertip on the pointed end of the lemon to angle/guide it when needed. It might be too bulky to fit between bodies for sex in the missionary position, but positions can be adapted, and it’s certainly smaller than something like a wand or even a standard-sized Womanizer.
  • It’s not often that I comment on a sex toy’s packaging or branding, because I don’t generally consider those things terribly important – but Hello Nancy knocked it out of the park with theirs. The toy came gorgeously presented in a pink and yellow box, along with a pink storage bag and an “instruction manual” printed on the backs of what appears to be stylized tarot cards. These are all such beautiful touches, and could make an aesthetically-conscious newbie feel more excited to try a sex toy for the first time, so I love ’em.
  • The Lem is IPX7 waterproof, meaning you can wash it in the sink or use it in the shower/bath without fear of ruining it.

Things I don’t like about the Hello Nancy Lem:

  • My issue with the Lem is the same issue I have with like 80% of pressure-wave toys: the nozzle is so small that it only covers the very tip of my clit, which is the most sensitive part and therefore the part most prone to overstimulation or discomfort if touched too intensely. There are no speeds low enough on the Lem for that to feel comfortable for me, so I use it exclusively on my clitoral hood or through my inner labia instead, stimulating my clit indirectly – but this isn’t how the toy was meant to be used, so it sometimes slides around, breaks its seal, etc. This push-and-pull between overstimulation and understimulation is a frequent problem for me with pressure-wave toys and makes orgasms less satisfying than they otherwise might be.
  • The Lem only has one button – you hold it down to turn the toy on or off, and short-press it to change modes. This system is inconvenient for those of us who like to increase and decrease the intensity of a toy over the course of a session, as you have to cycle through all 10 modes to get back to the first one. The button itself is also difficult to locate and press, as it’s embedded under the Nancy logo – a cute aesthetic choice, for sure, but not a very practical one.
  • There are only 4 steady speeds, followed by 6 patterns. Most of the patterns are far too inconsistent for me to ever want to use them. Dear toymakers: if you must equip your toys with pattern modes, please make most of them consistently rhythmic and with only brief pauses between moments of stimulation. Anyone who wants a frustrating tease can provide it themselves by simply turning the toy off mid-use and throwing it out the window.
  • $89 USD/$120 CAD feels steep for such a simple toy: one function, 10 modes (most of which I’d never really use, because they’re patterns).

Final thoughts

The Hello Nancy Lem is a fruity li’l cutie of a clit massager – lovely and satisfying, if perhaps a tad overpriced. Is a sweet aesthetic worth paying extra for? In the world of fashion, typically I’d say YES (while lobbing my wallet in your general direction), but when it comes to sex toys, I’m not sure. I think it’s a very personal decision, and if the Lem’s sunny yellow look makes your heart sing, then you should follow your bliss! I certainly prefer this lemon over the much more played-out rose toys I’m seeing everywhere these days.

I found the Lem overstimulating when used as intended, applied to my clit head-on – but even that speaks well of it, since many pressure-wave toys are sadly underpowered and this sure ain’t one of ’em. I wish that some differently-sized nozzle attachments were offered, as with some Womanizers, so that those of us with picky clits could try out a few different options to see what feels best.

But overall, I think the Lem is totally adorable and surprisingly enjoyable. It’s definitely the first time a lemon has made me come…

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.