May 16, 2021
A while ago, I read an article about people getting dressed up for their vaccinations. This idea immediately resonated with me: I love dressing up for things and find that it helps imbue events with extra significance for me. The ritual of assembling my femme ensemble helps me feel more put-together, centered, and prepared.
Shortly after reading that article, I wrote a poem about why it would feel emotionally impactful to wear something cute to a vax appointment. I won’t share it here because I’m waiting to hear back about potential publication, but one of the things I wrote in the poem was that I wanted to wear a leopard-print dress to show I was still wild after a year+ of captivity. On the day of my actual first dose, I hovered in front of my closet, trying to decide which dress would be best, and then I remembered that poem as my eyes alit on this leopard-print dress. Of course! It was the natural choice.
I got a lot of compliments on my look as I waited in line outside the clinic. I hadn’t realized, until people started commenting on it, that I’d inadvertently adorned myself with multiple rainbow hearts. The nurse who gave me my shot complimented my pen and pencil tattoo. Overall, a wonderful day.
What I’m wearing:
• Leopard-print skater dress – American Apparel, via eBay
• Black KN95 mask layered under a Pride heart mask from Threadless
• Red sparkly heart necklace – Tarina Tarantino
• Rainbow heart prescription sunglasses – Zenni
• Pink leather Cashin Carry tote – Coach (a findom gift from my love)
• Black leather harness boots – Frye
May 27, 2021
My psychiatrist told me recently (as he’s told me many times before) that I should try to go on more walks. “I always tell my patients to do that,” he said, “but recently I took some time off and started going on daily walks myself, and wow, it really makes a difference!” Unfortunately for my lazy ass, he’s right.
My dominant asked me what they could do to incentivize me to take more walks, and after pondering it a bit, I replied that I thought they should put “take a walk” on my to-do list on days when my workload seemed lighter, and provide a small assignment to do on the walk, something specific to photograph. I felt that would give me motivation, momentum, a goal.
It’s been working out well so far. I wore this outfit on a nice springtime walk with the intention of photographing a statue, for example.
What I’m wearing:
• Pink ribbed tank top – the Gap
• High-waisted skinny jeans – Madewell
• Pink cowboy boots – Jeffrey Campbell
• Pink leather Cashin Carry tote – Coach
• Turquoise Toy Story-print mask – an Etsy shop
• Hair in pigtails because it’s long enough to do that now!
May 31, 2021
This was my last day at my social media dayjob (which I call a dayjob purely out of habit; at the point that I decided to leave, it was only taking up 3-5 hours a week and bringing in ~7% of my income). In the pandemic age, I find it’s extra difficult to celebrate successes. You can’t invite your friends to go for a pint and clink your glasses together over what you’ve achieved, or take a mini-vacation as a reward for a job well done. So I asked my partner what they thought I should do to commemorate entering the land of the fully self-employed, and they suggested I order a bottled cocktail from Civil Liberties, my favorite bar.
I went online and ordered a double serving of the Call Me Maybe, a yummy drink involving grapefruit juice, fennel, fino sherry, and tequila. Then I decided to walk all the way to the bar – about 45 minutes – because it was a beautiful day. I think this was the first time I’d worn a crop top outdoors in nearly a year. Yay, spring!
What I’m wearing:
• Royal blue crop top – Forever 21, I think?
• Black A-line jersey skirt – ASOS
• Black bike shorts (worn underneath to help with chub rub) – American Apparel
• Red socks – the Gap
• Nike Air Zoom Pegasus 37 sneakers in teal – a findom gift from my love
• Pink leather Cashin Carry tote – Coach
• Black KN95 mask
June 2, 2021
Feeling in touch with my femmeness has been challenging this past year. I think that as much as my inner angry feminist often wants to snarl “I don’t dress up FOR YOU!!” there is nonetheless an element of my aesthetic that doesn’t feel worth performing if there’s no audience for it. Gender and style are both concepts that have an inward component as well as an outward component, and that outward one is hard to reckon with during a pandemic.
I put on this sweet floral dress to go buy some limes and mint so I could make a fave summer cocktail, the Southside, when having drinks with my friend/roommate Sarah later that night. We may not have been able to go sit on a pub patio or hang out at a cocktail bar, but I was determined to make our indoor lives feel summery and celebratory nonetheless, dammit.
What I’m wearing:
• Black/white/pink floral dress – CowCow
• Black leather Frye harness boots
• Pink leather Cashin Carry tote – Coach
• Black KN95 mask
June 3, 2021
Comfiest “outfit” ever. Sometimes I attempt to make my loungewear ensembles look aesthetically pleasing and intentional (as opposed to the times when I just throw on an oversized T-shirt from some rock concert of yore, pair it with underwear and fuzzy slippers, and call it a day).
I had recently reorganized my T-shirt drawer and resultingly rediscovered a bunch of shirts I forgot I owned, like this black cropped tank top, which is an essential item for when I want to feel summery but also goth.
What I’m wearing:
• Black ribbed cropped tank top – Forever 21? H&M? Not sure
• Black modal lounge pants – the Gap
• Tie-dye Bombas ankle socks – a gift from Matt’s mom