A few weeks ago, my great-aunt passed away. This blog isn’t the right space to talk about death and mourning, so I won’t get into all that, but it was a sad time.
While we sat around at the hospital, letting it sink in, my aunt (who knows I review sex toys) said to me, “When we were clearing out her apartment, we found a vibrator from the 1960s. You should have it for your collection.” I laughed, sort of thinking she was joking, but sure enough, a few days later, she dropped by with said vibrator in a plastic bag.
I was immediately struck by how much it resembles my Wahl. In fact, I initially thought it was an older model of the Wahl, until I saw the name branded on the side, “The Body Machine.” It was manufactured by a Canadian company called Charlescraft, whose website features autoplay music (ugh) and various appliances and contraptions, but no massagers. I guess they stopped making them around the time that people realized they could get real sex toys and stop repurposing their innocent muscle massagers.
While I had no intention of using the Body Machine (sorry, can’t get onboard with using my deceased relative’s instrument of lust on my genitals), I wanted to test how its power compared to the Wahl. I expected it to be stronger, but actually, the Wahl easily wins out. The Body Machine’s low speed is akin to the mid-range on a contemporary rechargeable vibe, and its high speed is barely any higher. I guess my great-aunt was less choosy about her sex toys than I am (although, I guess if it were the ‘60s, you’d have to be).
So what’s the point of all this? I guess it just served as a reminder for me that practically everyone is sexual, even the folks you wouldn’t think of in that way. With few exceptions, we all want to get our rocks off and have fun doing it. I’m just glad I live in a time and place where I can buy products specifically designed to give me orgasms, rather than relying on a home appliance.