Adventures in Multiple Orgasms

I’m only in my early twenties but sometimes I feel like my sexual function is already going downhill.

When I first learned to masturbate to completion as a child, I usually had at least two orgasms per bathtime jerk-off session – sometimes as many as four. When I became sexually active at sixteen, my partner and I would have marathon sessions in which I’d have up to five orgasms, solely from oral and maybe a little finger penetration. These figures amaze me when I look back at them now, but I have journal entries and meticulously-kept orgasm charts to prove they’re true. (Uh, I was a weird kid.)

See, I’m a pretty mono-orgasmic person these days, meaning that I’m a one-and-done kind of gal. I can continue having sex after I get off, and I usually do, but I don’t want to come any more. It always just seems like too much work, both for me and for my partner.

Once in a while, my boyfriend will manage to coax me into going for a second orgasm. After getting me off orally, he’ll wander around the periphery of my vulva, letting it calm down a little – and then he’ll slowly meander back toward my clit. And with a lot of sweating, muscle-tensing, and heavy breathing from both of us, sometimes we can conjure an orgasm numero dos. After about 40 minutes. Maybe.

But this sucks. As a woman, I’ve internalized the idea that multiple orgasms are my birthright and set me apart from men (despite the fact that my boyfriend has actually been known to get off twice per session). So, in my desire to expand my capacity for pleasure and to feel more like a “normal” woman, I’ve been practicing my multiple orgasms. I’ve been bringing myself off and then pushing through my feelings of reluctance, exhaustion and satisfaction until I get to the second orgasm on the other side. And it’s working.

Incase you were wondering, here are some of my best tips on how one-and-done chicks can turn themselves into multi-orgasmic powerhouses:

1. Start soft and small; then, increase stimulation from there. If I use a Hitachi for my first orgasm, there’s little chance of me having a second one, because I’ll be numb by then. I like to start with as little stimulation as possible – maybe a small or medium dildo in my vag and just my fingers on my clit – and then increase the amount of stimulation with each subsequent orgasm, to ensure it’ll happen. I save jackhammer vibes and giant dildos for late in the game, when I need something extra to push me over the edge.

2. Increase mental stimulation too. I am not normally one to fantasize, nor do I watch porn or read erotica all that often. But if I’m going to attempt to have a zillion orgasms, my mind needs to be engaged along with my body, or it just won’t work. Lately I’m obsessed with explicit New Girl fanfiction, but whatever gets you hot is fine, obviously. It’s a whole lot easier for me to reach orgasm, even my third or fourth one, if I’m watching Dylan Ryan plough somebody or reading killer erotica or, uh, fantasizing about Nick Miller. (Whatever, man, don’t judge!)

3. Don’t dive right back into it. Ugh – nothing turns me off faster than trying to attack my clit when I’ve just had an orgasm. I’m all like, “Ow! Fuck! What?! No!” and then I feel like I never want to touch myself again. Refractory periods are a reality and it’s important to be aware of how long yours typically lasts. Mine is usually about a minute or two, so if I can keep my sexual energy up during that time without actually touching my clit, I’ll be golden.

4. Make sure you’re awake and alert. Orgasms make most people feel kind of sleepy; it’s all those yummy neurotransmitters coming out to play. And while that’s nice for insomniacs and post-sex cuddlers, it’s not the most convenient thing for those of us who want to keep going after we get off. So pick a time when you’re feeling well-rested and ready to face the day, not a time when one lousy orgasm could obviously lead you into dreamland.

Can you have multiple orgasms? Did you have to learn how to do it, or did it come naturally? Any words of wisdom for those of us trying to learn?