Author: Kate Sloan

My Favorite Toys For Brain-Melting A-Spot Orgasms

Kate Sloan

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Sometimes people ask me why I don’t do much in-person sex education work – workshops, motivational speaking, and so on – and the reason is that I don’t feel I’ve really found my “niche” yet. My oeuvre doesn’t have a central focus within the sexuality field, the way, say, JoEllen writes about sex and depression or Drew talks about sex and disability.

However, if there’s one niche topic I’m uniquely known for, it’s the A-spot. I get tweets, comments and emails from people all the time, telling me I helped them identify that strange spot deep inside them that brings them so much pleasure. The A-spot barely gets any hype compared to its shallower neighbor, the G-spot – and yet, my interactions with readers have shown me that it’s a highly erogenous zone for a lot of people. I’m happy to be a one-woman PR machine for this underrated spot if it means getting the word out and bringing more pleasure to the world!

The number-one question I get about the A-spot is, “What are the best toys for finding and stimulating it?” So I’ve put together this guide to A-spot toys, because dammit, you guys deserve terrific orgasms.

General Shape and Size Considerations

So here’s the deal. The A-spot is waaaay deep inside the vagina, right in front of the cervix. This means that, as with G-spot toys, you’re going to want something that curves forward/upward, toward your belly button – but A-spot toys need to be longer, since your G-spot’s usually about 2-3 inches past the vaginal entrance and the A-spot will typically be another 2-3 inches past that (depending on arousal level, where you are in your cycle, and how high or low your cervix is generally).

The depth of the A-spot also means it responds best to toys with a gentle or small curve, not a drastic one. G-spot toys like the Pure Wand can’t do double-duty as A-spot toys, because they curve so intensely that they can’t get deep enough inside the vagina.

Additionally, because the A-spot is tucked away in front of the pain-sensitive cervix, you’re generally gonna want something with a narrow or tapered tip that can slide up in there. A toy that’s too wide will bump into the cervix and/or stop short of the A-spot. So, even if you’re ordinarily a girth enthusiast, you’ll want to size down somewhat if you’re seeking your A-spot.

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Silicone Toys

Edited to add (Dec. 6, 2021): A lot of the toys featured in this post have since been discontinued. My updated recommendations for the best silicone A-spot toys are the Easy A (which I designed), the Uberrime Night King, and the VixSkin Bandit.

The Tantus Tsunami will hold a special place in my heart forever, because it’s the toy that first introduced me to my A-spot. It has a slight curve right at the tip, which enables it to curl up in front of my cervix without bumping it. It’s also relatively slender at the tip and thicker through the rest of the shaft, which means the rest of my girth-loving vagina doesn’t have to go unsatisfied.

I also occasionally like realistic (read: cock-like) silicone dildos for A-spot purposes. The important factors are (as stated above) sufficient length, a slight curve, and a tapered tip. My faves are the Tantus Pack ‘n’ Play #1 and VixSkin Mustang. (The Mustang is also a killer G-spot dildo, when thrusted a little more shallowly, so it gets my Multi-Talented Toy seal of approval!)

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Glass & Metal Toys

Edited to add (Dec. 6, 2021): A lot of the toys featured in this post have since been discontinued. My updated recommendations for the best glass & metal A-spot toys are the Njoy Eleven, the Crystal Delights Star Delight, and the Icicles #53.

As with most internal erogenous zones, my A-spot likes a relatively firm touch, so glass is a good material for stroking it. The Fucking Sculptures G-Spoon is one of my all-time favorite A-spot whisperers: the slight curve at its tip lets it meander past my cervix just right. If you buy a G-Spoon for this purpose, make sure to order a medium or large one, so it’ll be long enough to get deep inside you.

Fucking Sculptures also makes the Double Trouble, arguably my favorite dildo of all time. Its thinner end hits my A-spot more consistently and pleasurably than any other toy in my collection. This is something of a mystery to me, since the Dub Trubz is super girthy (Sunny Megatron calls it “Fisting Lite“) and theoretically shouldn’t be able to slide past my cervix – and yet, it unmistakably strokes the fuck out of my A-spot. Something about its shape and angle just makes it inexplicably perfect for this task – provided you, like me, can handle its size.

For a cheaper and less dicey glass option, I recommend the Icicles #53. It has a tapered, slightly tilted head that can zero in on the A-spot with ease, and it retails for under $30. While it isn’t as luxurious as Fucking Sculptures’ artisanal offerings, it is simple and gets the job done.

Positioning

It can be tricky to reach the A-spot, whether you’re doing it yourself or having a partner do it for you. I’ve recently become obsessed with the Liberator Jaz as a solution to this problem. Slide it under your hips and it’ll elevate your butt and pelvis just right – not only for A-spot exploration but also for G-spot play, PIV sex, butt stuff, or pretty much any other precarious genital maneuver. (A pillow or two can achieve a similar effect for cheaper, but Liberator products hold their shape better than pillows and just do a better job overall, so I’d recommend ’em over pillows if you can afford it.)

Similarly to G-spot play, you might find you get a better sensation if you angle the base of your dildo downward (toward your butt) so that the tip makes better contact with your spot. I find it’s easier to have a partner do this than to do it yourself – plus it’s sooooo fun when someone is fucking you with a dildo and they find the perfect spot and get all excited about your sudden moans/screams/eyes rolling back in your head. (Umm, it’s possible that A-spot stimulation turns me into Regan MacNeil.)

Other Tips

Betcha could’ve guessed I’d recommend you use lube, huh?! “MORE LUBE” is basically the battle cry of the sex educator. But seriously, it helps. The more lubrication there is inside your vag, the more room you have to move around and the more comfortable you’ll tend to be.

That said: I’d also recommend you try A-spot stimulation sans lube at least a couple times, just to see if that feels different/better for you. I tend to skip lube when I use my Double Trouble because the presence of a little friction allows it to “pull” on my vaginal walls in a way that’s really pleasing to my A-spot. (Errr, this is a difficult thing to explain in words. Just trust me, sometimes strategic dryness is a good thing.) Extra lubrication is also a known effect of A-spot play, so don’t be alarmed if you find yourself juicier than usual when touching this spot.

The cervix is like the socially awkward friend who the A-spot brings to parties and sometimes has to babysit all night. Which is a roundabout metaphorical way of saying: unfortunately, your cervix has to be in a good mood for your A-spot to have any fun. For certain people, there are times in their hormonal cycle when their cervix might dip particularly low and/or be particularly sensitive to pain, and those times might not be ideal for A-spot play. It’s okay; you’ll just appreciate the pleasures of A-spot stimulation extra hard when you can experience them again.

When using toys on my A-spot, I tend to use small in-and-out motions, rather than big sweeping thrusts or scooping/rocking motions. However, as always, your mileage may vary, and you should experiment with different modes of movement to see what feels best for you.

I highly recommend incorporating clitoral stimulation when you play with your A-spot. These two things feel excellent separately and that excellence increases exponentially when you combine them. Like many people, I can’t come without clitoral involvement, so when I say I have “A-spot orgasms,” what I really mean is that I have blended clitoral/A-spot orgasms. And they are my very favorite orgasms my body is capable of. Unf.

Finally: please don’t feel bad if, despite knowing all this stuff and trying it out, you still don’t really respond to A-spot stimulation. Like any other erogenous zone on the body, it can be amazing for some people and totally “meh” for others. You are not broken or weird if your A-spot doesn’t respond to touch, or even if you actively dislike being touched there. Pursue what actually gives you pleasure, not what’s “supposed to” give you pleasure!

 

Those of you who have discovered the wonders of the A-spot: what are your favorite toys, tools and techniques for making your spot feel good?

 

I’m an Obsessive, Intense Weirdo and I Wouldn’t Trade It For Anything

Kate Sloan

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Today as I write this, my body is heavy with depression. My thoughts feel foggy and it’s been hard to move all day. It took enormous energy just to write to my best friend and tell them what was going on with me, and their gentle prodding from afar was the only thing capable of rousing me from bed. I slogged to a café, ordered something peppy to counteract my sluggishness, but even robust espresso can’t shake my sads off. I have bipolar II and this is how my depressive episodes are, sometimes: a deep and inexplicable sadness I feel in my mind and my body, and just have to ride out.

When I ask myself how my life would be different without mental illness, the temptation is to think: “I would be so much happier and more productive!” And while that might be true, I also wouldn’t wish my bipolar disorder away. Because the manic episodes are worth the depressive ones for me. My occasional mania is key to my personality, a perky prism through which I sometimes view the world. Most of my best ideas, my finest work, my biggest contributions to the world, originated in mania. It’s my superpower.

Back when I was in high school, and hadn’t yet been diagnosed, my emotions confused me. It always seemed that I felt things more deeply than the people around me. When I was sad, I wept for hours and journaled endlessly about my feelings. When I was happy, I giggled hysterically, distributed hugs freely and couldn’t keep a big dumb grin off my face. I noticed details more than other people seemed to, fixated on them for longer, and remembered them more clearly. When I liked someone, I really, really liked them.

This is still how I am now. Getting a diagnosis gave me some answers, but it didn’t really change anything. I still seem to experience emotions more strongly than most people I know, and that can be very isolating – especially romantically. I get addicted to and obsessed with people in a way that’s supposed to be special and rare, but is just par for the course for me. If I’ve ever been romantically or sexually interested in you, I guarantee there are pages upon pages about you in my journals, dozens of complimentary musings about you in my chat histories with friends, and elaborate fantasies about our future married life floating around in my brain.

Media narratives tell me that this kind of fixation occurs only when you’re deeply, truly in love with someone – but that’s not consistent with my experience. I obsess over potential beaux regardless of the longevity or validity of my feelings for them. It’s like I’m drowning in a sea of New Relationship Energy, except it happens with everyone I’m interested in, whether or not they’re new to me or we’re actually in a relationship.

As you might imagine, this brain problem makes it hard for me to engage in casual sex, or to approach romantic encounters with any degree of “chill.” When I had casual sex for the first time last summer, I journaled lengthy missives about the dude’s perfect dick and top-notch sense of humor, complained to friends about how he would never be my boyfriend, and then wrote a song which contains the lines, “I don’t have the strength/ to keep you at arm’s length/ I fall for all callers to my bed.” And, truth be told, I didn’t even like the dude that much. After he’d left my life and the dust had cleared, I saw that we’d never been that compatible. (He openly hates puns and musicals, and loves sports. I mean, really!) I’d seen him through rose-colored glasses, because my brain is addicted to romantic and sexual stimuli. Dick, any dick, lights up my neurons and makes me feel desperately out of control of my emotions.

Writing this is embarrassing. I am sitting in a coffee shop and cringing as I type these words, because I know someone will read them who I wish wouldn’t. At least one person reading this right now, inevitably, is someone on whom I have turned my laser-focused headlights of infatuation at some point. Maybe they are recoiling in surprise and fear, shocked to learn how deep my feelings went – but it’s more likely they’re just nodding in recognition. I am not good at hiding my feelings. Faced with a crush, I dissolve into a blushy, giggly, dorky mess. It is not subtle and it is not “cool.” Sometimes folks are okay with it, and sometimes they’re not and I scare them away. Either way, I am always profoundly embarrassed by how strongly I feel my feelings. There are times when I wish I could shut down my heart, so I could, at last, become chill and detached like everyone else.

But, deep down, I know I would never do that, even if I could. My strong feelings are what make me me. When I write corny love songs or impassioned blog posts, that art stems from my bottomless well of emotion. If I’ve ever written anything about desire or heartbreak that you found relatable, it’s only because I’ve been flooded with those feelings so completely for so long that I know them inside and out. My heart is in a constant cycle of passion, joy, desperation and despair, and though I’ve been down this road a thousand times, it hasn’t gotten any easier. But that intensity makes my life exciting, my art compelling and my world vivid as hell.

Maybe one day I’ll get tired of it. But for now, after 24 years of living inside this crazy roller-coaster brain, I’m still pretty at peace with it. At least, as much as you can be “at peace” with anything while riding a roller coaster.

Review: Lelo Mona Wave

Kate Sloan

There are a number of missteps that get sex bloggers up in arms. Conflating vulvas with vaginas. Sexist or racist toy marketing. Medical misinformation. We hate all of those things, but if you really wanna set off sex blogger tantrums galore, try telling us sex toys are a substitute for a human partner. Oh, we will flip our wigs.

So, what I’m about to say is somewhat sacrilegious, but: the Lelo Mona Wave is a sex toy which makes it glaringly, dishearteningly obvious that I am fucking a sex toy and not a person.

Normally this wouldn’t bother me. I’m under no illusions about sex toys needing to feel like real dicks, or mouths, or what have you. I know that human partners edge out toys in terms of spontaneity, excitement and responsiveness, but toys usually win when it comes to intense G-spot stimulation, hyper-efficient orgasms, or multi-tasking. But there’s something about the Mona Wave that routinely makes me sad it’s not a person. Like, deeply, disproportionately sad.

The Mona Wave is basically Lelo’s answer to Fun Factory’s Stronic line: automated thrusting for lazy masturbators comme moi. But while the Stronic thrums back and forth like a thrusting cock, the Mona Wave curls up and down like the come-hither-ing fingers of a G-spot-savvy lover. If that lover was extremely stoned or had just taken an elephant tranquilizer.

See, the Mona Wave’s motion is slooooow. There are two movement speeds, and they might as well be called “leisurely” and “tortoise-esque.” And that slowness is what makes me wish the toy was a human. It tries to directly imitate something humans do – that intense finger-curling that pleases so many G-spots the world over – but it does a bad job at replicating this act. If the Mona Wave were a human, I could sit up, give it a slightly exasperated look, and chirp, “Faster, please!” But it’s not a human, so I can’t do that. And it makes me feel… weirdly lonely.

Getting finger-fucked is one of my favorite acts. I fantasize about it frequently, and it’s often the way I get off with partners, their thick fingers stroking my insides as I hold a vibe to my clit. But what makes it exciting for me is the dynamism. It’s electrically hot to feel someone’s fingers quicken inside you when they sense that you need that, or ramp up the power of their thrusts as they feel you getting close. A well-attuned partner might slow down as you descend from the peak of your orgasm, or keep pounding at top speed if you prefer that. The Mona Wave doesn’t do any of these things, or even approximate them convincingly. And I know a toy isn’t a person, but it feels like Lelo has sent me a toy to do a person’s job.

Aside from the lacklustre motion settings, there’s not a whole lot to say about the Mona Wave. It vibrates, too, but as other reviewers have noted, the vibrations are disappointingly weaker than those on the standard Mona 2. I can rarely get off with the Mona 2 anyway – its vibrations are rumbly-ish but still just a liiiittle too buzzy for my demanding clit – so the Wave’s non-motion modes aren’t terribly exciting to me.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had several wonderful orgasms with the Mona Wave. But the G-spot stimulation is so tantalizingly slow that it feels like a partner is trying to keep me on the edge without letting me go over. If you’re into that sort of carefully meted sensation denial, you might enjoy the Mona Wave‘s lackadaisical stroking. But if your G-spot needs speed or pressure (and most need both), I’d recommend a Stronic thruster instead, or any decent G-spot dildo you can thrust by hand. You deserve better than a toy that almost gives you what you want.

Thanks for sending me this toy, Lelo!

Monthly Faves: Tangerine Dream, Vanilla Reverie & Lemongrass Perfume

Kate Sloan

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Maaaan, it was a weird month in my sex life. I started on sertraline (generic Zoloft) and it gave me some extremely annoying and disheartening sexual side effects, which I’d been warned about but had decided to risk anyway. My libido, sensitivity, and orgasmic potential were out of whack for much of the month. But the meds couldn’t kill my sexual spirit entirely: I still got up to no good, as I usually do!

Sex toys

• My Ttamage glass dildo got a surprising amount of use this month, considering how long I’ve had it and how infrequently I dig it out. I had more G-spot cravings than I usually do, for some reason, and the Ttamage dildo is one of the most ergonomic G-spot dildos I own because there’s so much extra length to use as a handle. Nothin’ like pounding your spots with cold, hard glass that warms up inside your body… Mmm.

• I’ve had my Liberator Wedge for a few years, and while I like it, it’s so big that it’s not always convenient to use. I’ve been wanting a smaller positioning aid to use during masturbation and PIV sex. It was love at first sight when I fondled a Jaz Mini at a sex shop in Milwaukee. The Jaz is barely wider than my hips, so it’s easier to manoeuver into place than the Wedge, and it’ll be easier to schlep to partners’ houses if I ever do that.

• Okay, marijuana isn’t technically a sex toy. But a) I couldn’t think of another toy to put on this list, and b) weed helped so much with my libido troubles this month. Specifically, a strain called Tangerine Dream, which makes my skin feel all warm and tingly, a sensation that parlays easily into arousal. Unfortunately, the Toronto police just cracked down on dispensaries so my weed usage might have to be put on hold, at least until the federal government legalizes it…

Fantasy fodder

• My mid-masturbation Google searches are the most accurate representation of what really turns my crank. This month, for whatever reason, “she keeps going after he cums” is a thing I typed into Google a lot. I found videos like this one which turned me on to no end.

• I have an occasional play partner who’s super vanilla, but who often gives me verbal permission to fantasize about anything I want while he’s stimulating me if it’ll help me get off. I love that! It’s remarkably selfless to acknowledge that your partner’s mind might not always be on you and that’s okay. But in this case, I was thinking about him – just a kinkier, toppier version of him. This is what’s so cool about sexual fantasy as an arousal tool: you can imagine anyone you want, doing anything you want. My vanilla fuck-pal might never call me a “good girl” or spank me as hard as I like it, but I can experience that in my fantasies to my heart’s content… and maybe one of these days, I’ll get him to dom me IRL, too.

• Fisting drifts in and out my fantasy life a lot. I think I’m drawn to it more for reasons of emotional intimacy than physical satisfaction. Much like anal sex, I’d only want to engage in this taboo act with a highly trusted partner – and I’m sure it would be amazing if I was able to open myself up to it, figuratively and literally.

Sexcetera

• Holy hell, you guys. My threesome with Bex and our anonymous gentleman friend was so fantastic. No disrespect to my previous threesome compadres, but this one was easily my favorite of the three ménages I’ve been in. It was basically an amalgamation of all my favorite elements of sex: blowjobs, fingerbanging, sex toys, spanking, makeouts, and gigglin’ up a storm. When we were all fucked out, we ordered Mexican food, pigged out, and then crawled into bed for an all-night three-way cuddle pile. It was truly a perfect night. And – get this – we might be able to reprise it when all three of us are in the same city for a few days in July. (Shh… Bex and I haven’t pitched this plan to our dude-pal yet. But I have a feeling he’ll be down…)

• Mid-May brought Smut in the 6ix, an all-day porn extravaganza featuring panels, screenings and performances. It was so much fun! I got to meet fellow sex bloggers, listen to smarties talking about their smutty passions, giggle at great porn on the big screen, play music for a crowd, and dance my ass off. I love my community!

• I’ll probably blog about this in more detail at some point, but my sexuality has felt really non-genitally-focused lately. Or at least, not focused on my genitals. I’m sure it’s at least partly because of my sensitivity and libido issues this month, but I’m currently less interested in having my bits stimulated and more interested in doing stuff to other people with my mouth and hands. (“Stone” is a term sometimes used in queer communities to describe people who have sex in this way.) We shall see how this develops…

Femme stuff

• One morning in early May, I was at work and I got a text from my friend Tynan. One of the many things Tynan does professionally is aromatherapy, and she’d had a detailed dream about making an aromatherapeutic blend specifically for me. She described the dream-blend to me – lemongrass for repelling negativity, pink grapefruit for a deeper connection to my body, and rose for self-compassion – and I thought it sounded totally blissful, so she said she’d make it for me IRL. I’ve been wearing it every day, a drop on the collar of my shirt or dress, and I looooove it. It’s femme but feisty, just like me, and it makes me feel so calm and happy!

• I bought a teal skater dress at a Forever 21 in the Mall of America in Minnesota last month, and I’ve been absolutely thrashing it lately. Yay for clothes that are easy to just throw on and go, and still look kinda fancy!

• Bex is such a huge influence on my brain and my life; why not my aesthetic, too? I admired the quirky/queer/kinky vibe of all the sex-positive pins grouped together on their leather jacket, so I adorned my own jacket in pins when I got home from Minneapolis. It looks preeeeeetty damn good.

What things made your month magical, my darlings?

When Sex Nerds Plan a Threesome

Kate Sloan

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This weekend, I’ll hop on a bus and ride it for 10 hours, into another country, where I’ll have my first out-of-homeland threesome. We’ve been planning it for six weeks. Those weeks have felt like years.

See, both of my previous threesomes were impromptu – happy accidents of timing and circumstance. This one was deliberate, chosen, considered. I can see the merits of both approaches: spontaneous sex gives my anxiety less time to take root and psych me out, while long-haul schemin’ allows for excitement to build like a pre-record-launch hype campaign.

Any activity is more fun if you’re doing it with people who love it. That’s true of sex, and it’s also true of planning sex. Both of my threesome co-conspirators in this case – Bex and a gentleman friend of ours – are as nerdy about sex as I am. This made our brainstorming, scheduling and co-ordinating into a delightful process, like planning a party… except with more sexting.

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The Negotiations

When you think about sex critically and deeply on a regular basis, you become more aware of what you want, what you like, what turns you on – and what doesn’t. Once you know what you want, the next step is to ask for it. That can be scary sometimes: our carnal cravings are so close to our hearts and entrenched in cultural shame that often our inclination is to downplay our desires. But I’m lucky enough to be having a threesome with two people I deeply trust, who I know would never shame me for articulating what I want.

In weeks of chatting and spitballing, we came up with some mutually exciting activities to include in our threesome docket. And the best part of it is, all three of us are so easygoing and invested in each other’s enthusiastic consent that we know we can abandon anything on the list if it feels wrong on the day of. “We’ll just be like a bunch of little puppies,” dude said to me in one of our many excited exchanges about threesome logistics. “We’ll try stuff out.”

Bex and I are solely-platonic friends who engage with each other sexually on a very limited basis, so part of our negotiations involved setting boundaries for what we will and won’t do to each other. Fortunately, we were on the same page about everything we discussed: we’re cool with doing a double BJ, making out, and some boob stuff, but below-the-belt action is off the table except for maybe manoeuvring dildos.

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The Feelz

Sex nerds understand that sometimes sex stirs up feelings, and the best defense against icky feelz is to talk them out, before, during and after your experience of them. Good communication where everyone feels respected, heard, and valued = good sex, with minimal drama.

The dude in our trio is someone with whom I have sexual history. He also gives me hella heart-eyes feelings, and I sometimes struggle with jealousy when I really like someone. Both he and Bex repeatedly made sure I was okay with “sharing him,” before and during the planning of our ménage. Though I might have felt gross if he’d jumped into the three-way headfirst without regard for my feelings, the amount of care he took with me put me at ease. As of right now, I’m not feeling a shred of jealousy – but I know that if I do feel strange on the day itself, I’ll have two friends there to talk it out with.

If you find yourself dealing with similar jealousies leading up to a threesome, think about what kinds of accommodations might help with that. I asked Bex if I could be the one to swallow dude’s cum after we blow him together, because being “rewarded” with jizz at the end of a beej feels satisfyingly intimate to me and I think I’d be sad if I missed out on it. Bex said yes, ’cause they’re an angel.

Bex has also recently started using they/them pronouns full-time and publicly identifying as non-binary, and that entered into our pre-threesome talks as well. Dude was amenable to learning about gender stuff, especially since he knows getting it wrong could kill the moment – so we talked about what pronouns, names and titles were and weren’t okay. Yay, respect and correctness!

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The Gear

I know all you sex toy nerds are curious about what I’m bringing, so here’s a rundown:

• Pegging may or may not happen, depending on the Whims of the Butthole. I’ve packed my pink Aslan Jaguar harness. Assuming we get the go-ahead, it could either be me or Bex who’ll do the fucking; we’ll see how we feel. I’ve also packed my bright blue Happy Valley Perk, because it feels the most like “my cock,” though I’m open to strapping on other dildos too.

• Dude likes using toys on people, and has proven his prowess at doing so. Bex and I think it’s hilarious to imagine him fucking us each simultaneously with our own Eleven or Double Trouble, so I’ve packed both of mine. Dual-wielding!!

• Vibe-wise, I’m bringing my Magic Wand Rechargeable and maybe my Tango. I just need something reliable to hold on my clit while dude finger-bangs me or pounds me with a toy or fucks me… Um, no, I’m not blushing! Why would you say that?!

• Bex and I like when I spank them, so that’ll probably happen during this threesome. They own all our favorite implements (including the almighty Pelt), so the only impact toy I’m bringing is my Maddie’s Dungeon wooden paddle, ’cause it’s cool.

• I threw my Ryder in there because last time I slept with this dude, he liked how tight my vag felt when the Ryder was in my butt. I am always eager to please.

• Like a Boy Scout, I am prepared as hell: my sex toy bag is topped off with dude’s favorite condoms, some lube samples, and black latex gloves.

Have you ever planned a threesome? What was the process like for you? (And what toys did you bring?!)