Review: Sohimi Sucking Clitoris Stimulator & Wand Massager

I feel like I’ve reviewed approximately one zillion pressure-wave toys as of late… and I sort of have. But, encouragingly for this once-tiny category of sex toy, each one I’ve reviewed recently has been pretty different. There used to be very little variety in pressure-wave land, but now you can get tons of different takes on this same basic idea.

Today I’m reviewing the Sohimi Sucking Clitoris Stimulator & Wand Massager, which I think needs a much snappier name, like perhaps the Suck ‘n’ Buzz, or the Beyond Wand. (Okay, no one should hire me as a sex toy namer. That much is clear.)

This petite pink rechargeable wand vibrator has a classic wand head at one end, and a clitoral suction nozzle at the other end. At first I was confused about why anyone would want this, but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense to me. Vibration and pressure waves are the two major modes of clitoral stimulation that the sex toy industry offers these days; it’s a cool idea to package them both in one toy, so that regardless of which one you’re in the mood for, you’ll have both at the ready. Or you can start with one and switch to the other mid-session, something I often do.

The pressure-wave functionality of this toy is… not my favorite. The nozzle isn’t as tiny as that of the Sohimi Hedgehog, but is still pretty small, so it’ll probably only stimulate the very tip of your clit. It starts out very mild – which I appreciate, since suction toys can often feel wayyy too intense toward the beginning of a session – and gets much stronger as you cycle through its 7 suction modes. But rather than feeling rumbly and rhythmic, these pressure waves start to just feel like buzzy vibration as I turn up their intensity – so eventually they just numb the tip of my clit and don’t feel like much of anything. Boo.

The vibration component of this toy is much more compelling to me. It’s a weird blend of buzzy and rumbly. I’m sure it’s not ideal for everyone, but it surprised me with how much it felt like “the best of both worlds”: it contains some of the deep, delightful thrumming I associate with rumbly vibration, but also has that surface-level, buzzy edge that can sometimes push me into an orgasm. The orgasms I have with this toy are, indeed, very intense, and come on surprisingly fast.

It’s strong from the get-go, strong enough that I have to spend a good few minutes moving it around my outer labia and thighs before I’m warmed-up enough to put it on my clit. The vibrations get a bit buzzier as they get stronger, but it’s still nowhere near the shitty, desensitizing sensation I get from most inexpensive wands of this one’s ilk.

The powerful vibrations are, I think, especially well-suited for transmitting through something, like underwear or even another sex toy. I used this vibe on my partner’s cock cage while they were in chastity, for example, and the sensation traveled through the cage loud and clear.

There are only three steady speeds, followed by a handful of patterns. I do wish there were more steady modes available, since they’re what I use almost exclusively, but this annoyance is easily mitigated by just moving the vibe around on my vulva. The same speed can feel very intense when it’s on my clit and much less intense when it’s on my labia (of course), and I use this strategy to make the vibe’s limitations work for me.

Unfortunately this toy is suuuuper loud, despite its marketing copy claiming that it is quiet. (I don’t know why so many sex toy manufacturers insist on saying their demonstrably loud toys are actually nearly silent. If someone is shopping for a quiet toy, it’s generally because they need a quiet toy, due to their living situation. Companies should not lie about this!) It actually makes a somewhat ugly, grinding sound. The noise eases up a bit when I press the toy against my body – or when I use it in the bath, which is doable because it’s fully waterproof – but it’s still loud enough to be heard through a closed door.

One neat thing about this toy is that you can enable both the suction mode and the vibration at the same time – so, theoretically, you could use it with a partner, like a double-ended dildo except for external stimulation only. (Well, I guess you could try to insert the wand head into your vagina, but I wouldn’t recommend it.)

For its $35 price tag, I think you could do a whole lot worse than the Sohimi Sucking Clitoris Stimulator & Wand Massager. Its vibrations are significantly more powerful than what you’d typically find in a vibrator at this price point, and I like that you can switch between suction and vibration at will for a more varied masturbation session. If you have the cash, I’d recommend you just get two separate toys that do their jobs very well (and much more quietly than this one), like perhaps the Satisfyer Pro 2 and Bodywand Midnight, which would run you about $90 total. But I know many people’s budgets are tight right now, and to that end, I think the Sohimi Sucking Clitoris Stimulator & Wand Massager is a pretty cool product if you want big vibrations in a small package, with a side of clitoral suction. Just don’t expect to be able to hear your sexytimes playlist over the roar of the vibe.

 

Thanks to Sohimi for sending me this toy! This review was sponsored, which means I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Lelo Sila

Sometimes when I get high, I start rambling about clitoral politics.

“Clitoral politics, huh?” my spouse said, half-suspicious and half-amused, when I brought up this phrase during a recent intoxicated soliloquy.

“Yes. Let me explain,” I said, and I did. See, I’d been reading Kink earlier that week, which is a book of short stories about sex, power, sensuality, etc. written by famous authors who mostly are not known for lewd work. One of those authors is Roxane Gay, who I admire very much – and notably, at one point in her story, she used the phrase “base of my clit” to describe the particular pleasure point where her protagonist was being stimulated. This made me very happy.

As previously discussed, when it comes to clitoral stimulation, indirectness is my jam – and when it comes to oral sex in particular, full-mouth stimulation (as opposed to surface-level tongue-flicking) is my preference. Although my clit is average-sized, these methods necessitate an understanding of the clitoris as a three-dimensional structure. The glans of a penis isn’t the whole penis, and the glans of a clitoris isn’t the whole clitoris. Even setting aside the huge portion of the clitoris that is buried inside the body, even the external portion of the clit has a head, a shaft, and – yes – a base. (Thanks, Roxane. You are thought-provoking as ever.)

I hopped onto Google and searched some phrases relevant to this line of thinking. When I saw that the phrase “shaft of my clit” brought up only 3 pages of results, and that one of those results was a sex toy review on my own blog, I knew I needed to talk more about this stuff. When I invoke the phrase “clitoral politics,” what I mean, mostly, is the sociocultural import of discussing the clitoris as a three-dimensional object, as a major source of pleasure and orgasms, and as a structure more complex and worthy of study than the vast majority of mainstream sex publications even hint at.

This brings me to the Lelo Sila. Like many sex toy enthusiasts, I have a love/hate relationship with Lelo that has leaned harder on the “hate” side of the spectrum in recent years. Their structurally problematic condoms, needlessly sky-high prices, and baffling decision to hire a known domestic abuser as their spokesperson have all made me wary of them. But they made the Sila, and, well… on at least the topic of clitoral politics, the Sila and I seem to be aligned with one another.

The Sila is yet another toy that uses “sonic waves.” Every company that makes one of these toys seems to have a different name for them; Satisfyer uses “air-pulse technology,” Womanizer prefers “pleasure air technology,” and Dame favors “pressure wave technology.” These toymakers usually claim that their take on the technology in question is somehow unique, and I don’t have the mechanical knowledge necessary to confirm or dispute that. I can tell you that even as a seasoned sex toy reviewer, I often have trouble discerning and describing the differences between these toys’ sensations. There are definitely some pressure-wave toys I like better than some others, but I often have trouble explaining why, even though it is my literal job to do so. They just don’t seem to vary as much from toy to toy, sensation-wise, as, say, dildos or butt plugs can.

Dat mouth, tho

The Lelo Sila is different, though, because of the way it is shaped. It has a very wide “mouth” for this type of toy, because it is designed to envelop not just the tip of the clit, but the external clit in its entirety. “Build your sexual experience with [the Sila’s] softer, deeper, and overall bigger mouth that will give you complete satisfaction from top to bottom,” Lelo says in the toy’s marketing copy, and (uncommonly for sex toy marketing copy) they’re actually right: the Sila’s opening is wide and deep enough to enclose my clit all the way down to its base. (Ooh, that phallic language is making me nervous to type out. That’s how I know I need to keep typing it!)

Toys designed for cis women don’t generally do this. Maybe there’s a perception that we won’t enjoy this type of stimulation, because it’s too blowjob-esque. The qualities I’m extolling here are many of the same ones that make the Sila a potentially great toy for transmasculine folks with testosterone-induced bottom growth. But cis women can enjoy that type of stimulation too – and enjoy it, I do.

The Sila’s mouth also has a wide, flat silicone ring encircling it – its “lips,” if you will – which presses against the space between my outer and inner labia when my clit’s inside the toy. This has the effect of stimulating not only my labia but also the deeper, buried “legs” of my clit that lie under the surface in that area. (The flat ring also enables the Sila to maintain a better suction seal around my clit, a chronic problem with this type of toy, especially when I close my thighs tight around it.) What results is a much more full-bodied, satisfying sensation than the typical clit stimulator would ever be able to provide.

Some of my sex toy reviewer friends – including Rae at TheNotice.net, who also reviewed this toy – have noted that the Sila isn’t as powerful as they would prefer. I only ever seem to use the first 3-5 of its 8 speeds, though, because the deep rumbly sensation of the toy stimulating my entire clitoral shaft is apparently enough to get me off even without a ton of power behind it. (I guess this is also why I adore the Eroscillator, which thrums my internal clitoris marvelously but has been decried by many other sex toy reviewers as not powerful enough.) I would agree that this toy is probably not the ideal thing if you’re a fan of, say, super strong wand vibrators, or intense direct clit stimulation. But it’s not wimpy, either, and gets me off with a speed and ease that many other pressure-wave toys could only dream of.

A major elephant in the room here is that the Lelo Sila costs $169 (nice) in the U.S., and $219-229 in Canada. A friend recently asked me if she should buy a Sila, having never tried a pressure-wave toy before, and I strongly cautioned her against it – because if you’ve never put one of these things on your clit, you can’t really know for certain if you’ll like it, and I wouldn’t want anyone to waste $150+ on a toy they might never use again. My advice would be to start with a much cheaper toy from this category, like the Satisfyer Pro 2 ($50). If you try one, and enjoy the sensation but wish the toy’s mouth was wider and deeper, then you’ll probably dig the Sila.

Notably, my orgasms with pressure-wave toys are different than my orgasms with other toys, and not always in a good way. There’s something about the novelty and speediness of the sensation that sometimes causes me to have a small, shitty orgasm all of a sudden, before I’m able to even realize what’s happening and dial back the stimulation. It reminds me of porn bloopers I’ve seen where a cis male performer comes sooner than he’s expecting to, unable to hold it back. That idea turns me on a lot in porn, but for myself, I’d rather have a more deliberate and more intense orgasm, even if it takes more time and effort. A lot of my orgasms with the Sila have been of the “Wait, was that an orgasm?” variety, despite how good the toy feels up to that point. It’s really weird and probably has to do with the indirectness of the “touchless” sensation.

I’ve had good orgasms with pressure-wave toys; they’re just less common for me than they are with vibrators and oscillators, for whatever reason. But even when I’m just using the Lelo Sila as a warm-up toy, planning to finish myself off with my hand or another toy later on, it still feels pretty damn excellent. I can take it in the bath, or use it hands-free while reading erotica, or fantasize about incredible oral sex while it’s pressed against me. It does something that no other toy I’ve tried has done: stimulates my entire external clit, from base to tip. It may not be transformative, as far as clitoral politics go, but it’s a start.

 

Thanks to Lelo for sending me this toy to try! You can get one at SheVibe ($169.00) or Peepshow ($169.99).

Review: Sohimi Mini Tongue Vibrator

The sex toy industry has been trying for many years to produce something that feels like cunnilingus. While certain toys have managed to replicate an aspect of good oral, like the rhythmic sucking of a Satisfyer or the tongue-flicking of a Sqweel, none have really been able to mimic the whole sensation of receiving good head. I think that’s because it’s very person-dependent and anatomy-dependent, and usually involves a mix of sucking and stroking that toys are just not capable of yet.

That said, though – some of these toys still feel pretty damn good, even if they don’t exactly feel like oral sex.

Sohimi sent me their Mini Tongue Vibrator, and I was skeptical, but intrigued. Could a tiny silicone tongue really get me off? Could the motor of a $16 sex toy get me off in any configuration, for that matter?

I had been burned (proverbially speaking) by cheap tongue-shaped vibrators before. Usually they’re just made to look like a tongue, but don’t actually move like one or feel like one at all – they feel like vibration. This toy is a bit different, though: the tongue actually does move back and forth a little, albeit very fast, so it creates a sensation that’s much more akin to tapping or oscillation than vibration. In practice, this means that it doesn’t cause numbness as quickly as many vibrators do, and the rumbling seems to extend more deeply into my internal clit. Definitely a good thing!

I would strongly recommend using a ton of lube with this toy, because no one likes a dry tongue (except maybe Ellie Kemper in that one comedy video). Water-based lube is probably your best bet because the toy is silicone, but you’ll likely need to reapply (or reactivate the lube with a little water) periodically when it dries out.

Soft silicone “petals” form a ring around the tongue which is supposed to be able to create a suction effect if you press it against your vulva, with the tongue in the centre against your clit. I suspected this would not work for my body, and I was right – I prefer indirect clitoral stimulation so I tend to hold the tongue against the side or hood of my clit instead of directly on the head, like this method requires. However, I do enjoy the feeling of having my entire clit enveloped, at least psychologically if not physically.

Sohimi’s website says this toy is “super quiet without noise. You cannot be heard at close range by anyone when using this tongue vibrator,” and that’s just laughably untrue. It’s a loud toy; most flappy-tongue toys are loud, due to the nature of their mechanics. It’s loud enough to be heard clearly from across the room and faintly through a closed door. It does quiet down a bit when pressed against flesh, but not enough that I’d call it a quiet toy by any means.

As with many toys of this type, this one slows down a bit when you press it against your body – but unlike a lot of other toys for which this is true, the Sohimi one’s motor doesn’t struggle or overheat when this happens. As a result, I feel free to experiment with applying different amounts of pressure to achieve different intensities of tongue-flapping. More pressure = slower, rumblier flicks; less pressure = faster, buzzier, more aggressive flicks.

It’s cool to have that level of control, because this toy only has 3 steady settings. All the other ones are patterns, and I just can’t bring myself to care about patterns – I’m a steady-speed girl all the way. Offbeat rhythms are sometimes cool when an actual tongue does them, but with a robot tongue like this one, irregular intervals of vibration just distract and annoy me instead of turning me on.

While I was surprised by how powerful this toy is for its tiny size, I don’t think it’s quite strong enough to get me off. Either that or the highest speed is just too distractingly loud for me to reach orgasm with it. But I gotta say, I still think this toy feels really good and really unique, and that there are a lot of people who would enjoy it. It doesn’t numb my clit like most vibrators in its price range, it’s super portable, and I love its flowery aesthetic. With its mere $16 price tag (at time of writing), the Sohimi Mini Tongue Vibrator is probably the best oral sex simulacrum you’re gonna find for under $50. I wish it was quieter, but hey… real oral sex can be noisy too. 😉

 

This review was sponsored, which means I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

My Valentine’s Day Sex Toy Recommendations for 2021!

I’ll take just about any excuse to buy a sex toy for someone I love. Valentine’s is coming up, and while it’s a weird-as-fuck “holiday” in many ways, it’s also an opportunity to lavish a loved one with affection and appreciation – even if that loved one is yourself.

Here are some tried-and-tested gift recommendations that I think you and/or your sweetie(s) would enjoy!

 

Clitoral Toys

  • I still think the Satisfyer Penguin ($71) is one of the cutest pressure-wave clit toys out there. It’s even wearing a little bowtie, which feels Valentine’s-appropriate!
  • The We-Vibe Tango ($60) is one of the best and rumbliest clitoral vibes on the market. There’s a new updated version, the Tango X ($79), which has the benefits of a longer battery life, more vibration settings, and a more ergonomic grip – though if you’re strapped for cash, I still think the original is a wonderful toy.
  • I also love the Dame Kip ($85) – it’s strong, rumbly, and so so cute!
  • If you want a strong wand vibrator to rock your clit’s world, my top recommendations are, as ever, the Magic Wand Plus ($75) and the Magic Wand Rechargeable ($130). Get the latter if you really, really don’t wanna be chained to an outlet – but if you almost exclusively use vibes where there’s an outlet nearby, you’ll be fine with the Plus.

 

Dildos

  • If affordability is your priority (and I don’t blame you), I gotta heartily recommend the Funkit Toys NoFrilldo collection ($24-40). These colorful silicone toys feel great, look great, and are way more wallet-friendly than many dildos of comparable quality. They’re also harness-compatible!
  • The super-ripply Tantus Echo ($50) is a long-time favorite of mine. You’ll love this one if you like the “popping” sensation that happens when the coronal ridge of a penis or a dildo first slides inside you – it’s basically that, all the way down!
  • The Njoy Pure Wand ($110) is the gold standard when it comes to intense G-spot stimulation.
  • The New York Toy Collective Carter ($220) is one of my favorite dual-density silicone dildos. It’s a must-have for size monarchs and people who like getting fucked hard but don’t want it to result in internal bruising.

 

Penis Toys

  • You can’t really go wrong with a Tenga Egg ($9) if you’re looking for a disposable stroker.
  • The Fleshlight Quickshot ($32) is much more affordable than your standard Fleshlight, and because it’s open-ended, it can also be incorporated into a blowjob or various other activities. It’s also much easier to clean than the standard closed-end kind.
  • The We-Vibe Pivot ($119) is my favorite vibrating cock ring. Whether you want it for use during PIV or anal, or just to jazz up your masturbation, it’s got one of the rumbliest motors I’ve ever experienced in a cock ring and is pretty intuitive to use.
  • We-Vibe’s new ArcWave Ion ($229) uses the same type of pressure-wave technology you’ll find in Satisfyers and Womanizers, but focuses it on the frenulum of the penis. This makes it an especially good pick for people who are bored of their hand or conventional strokers, or even potentially people who experience genital dysphoria during penile masturbation.

 

Anal Toys

  • In my humble opinion, the Njoy medium Pure Plug ($70) is the best butt plug on the market. It’s simply the most comfortable, pleasurable, and beautiful butt plug I’ve ever tried, and I’ve tried a lot of them.
  • The Tantus Neo ($29) is an affordable silicone butt plug with a comfortably contoured base. It’s nothin’ fancy, but it does the trick.
  • For the discerning prostate stimulation connoisseur in your life, get the Lelo Loki ($169), a powerful and rumbly prostate massager that my partner adores.

 

Kink Toys

  • I can heartily recommend anything made by Unicorn Collaborators, a Toronto-based leather goods company. Get the Double Duty Cuffs ($30) if you want an easy way to try bondage (while looking cool as hell), or the KnuckleFucker hand harness ($50) if you want a new way to fuck your partner with a dildo (or vice versa).
  • The Sportsheets under-the-bed restraints system ($40) is an easy, affordable way to turn your bed into a bondage hotspot! I love mine and use it way more often than I would have predicted when I first got it.
  • A simple satin blindfold ($7) is a fantastic way to wade into sensory deprivation play without breaking the bank.

 

Strap-On & Gender Affirmation Toys

 

Miscellaneous

  • If you want a romantic science project to do together, you simply can’t go past the Clone-a-Willy Kit ($40) or Clone-a-Pussy kit ($70).
  • The Liberator Jaz ($72) is my favorite piece of sex furniture. It makes many sex positions/acts much easier and more comfortable to achieve, especially for folks with chronic pain, muscle weakness, etc.
  • Liberator Throe ($130) is definitely a decadent splurge item, but if you and/or your partner(s) are prone to squirting – or just into messy sex/kink acts like wax play or sploshing – then it’s a must-have.

 

What are your Valentine’s plans this year, if any?

P.S. Here are some previous Valentine’s-related posts I’ve written over the years:

Review: Sohimi Hedgehog Vibrating Clitoral Sucker

Remember when the original Womanizer came out and was prohibitively expensive? This often happens when new sex toy technology is introduced into the market. First, it’s rare and pricey; then, gradually, it becomes more common and more affordable. Some of the reasons for this aren’t great (companies yoinking each other’s ideas and designs; the greedy capitalistic overemphasis on the bottom line), but on the plus side, this phenomenon allows the average person to experience types of pleasure that would have been financially inaccessible to them just a few years before. Yay!

I bring this up because the Sohimi Hedgehog vibrating clitoral sucker only costs $23 at the time that I’m writing this, which I think is pretty neat – especially given the prices of comparable clitoral pressure-wave toys, like the Satisfyer Penguin ($40) and VeDO Suki ($61). But is the Hedgehog worth paying $23 for? Let’s discuss…

I love that they called this toy the Hedgehog (at least, its instruction manual does; it has a much more generic name on Sohimi’s website), because it really does look like one, sans spikes. Where the spikes would go, there is instead a panel of ridged hard plastic, which is super helpful when you’re trying to keep a good grip on this toy in the bath, or with lubey hands.

This toy is, unfortunately, really loud. Maybe not as disruptively loud as an actual hedgehog, but definitely loud enough that I felt weird about using it in the bedroom with the door closed while my spouse was on a work call in the living room. Like most pressure-wave toys, it quiets down significantly once you put it on your clit, but it’s still distractingly loud at all times when it’s on.

Aside from that, my main problem with this toy is its tiny nozzle. This is very much a matter of taste, and of anatomy. It’s literally about one-quarter the size of the nozzle on the new Lelo Sila (which does, admittedly, have a bigger-than-average nozzle for this type of toy). I have found, in my adventures, that I prefer a bigger nozzle for pressure-wave toys, not because my clit is huge (it’s average to perhaps slightly above average), but because I like my clit to be covered by my clitoral hood when it’s being stimulated, and that’s not usually possible with smaller nozzles, which require me to pull back my hood so I can place the toy’s “mouth” around the very tip of my clit. As such, with the Hedgehog, I have to choose between putting my super-sensitive, exposed clit into its minuscule hole, and getting very little suction (if any) because the toy can’t form a seal properly around my clit and its hood.

If you know your clit is on the smaller side (which I realize is a difficult thing to know, since clit size is not discussed nearly as much, or in nearly as much detail, as penis size), you might prefer a small-nozzled toy like this one, mostly because the sides will touch your clit more directly than a bigger-nozzled toy so you’ll be able to feel more of the vibrations that are coupled with pressure waves here. But if you mainly enjoy the pressure waves (and the suction effect they create) and care less about vibration, I think a bigger nozzle would also be fine.

Other than this fatal flaw (for my particular body), I think this is a pretty cool toy. I love how small, portable, and cute it is. I love that it charges magnetically and can be taken in the bath or shower. The nozzle has gentler, more rounded-off edges than some of these toys do, which makes it comfortable, rather than pokey, when applied to my bits. The vibrations and suction feel decently rumbly and “bass-y,” and I enjoy them on my nipples if not on my clit. But the loudness and the restrictively small nozzle mean I won’t reach for the Sohimi Hedgehog nearly as often as I’ll reach for something quieter and more pleasurable, like another Sohimi toy I’ve previously reviewed here.

Sure is cute, though.

 

This post was sponsored, which means I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.