Sex Toy Reviews – Page 9

12 Days of Girly Juice 2022: 9 Best New Sex Toys

December 7, 2022December 6, 2022Kate Sloan

Yes, it’s that time again: time for me to sift through the dozens of sex toys I’ve been sent to review this year, and pick out my very favorites to highlight here.

I always have to make a lot of tricky decisions when putting this list together, and this year was no exception. But I think the 9 toys I settled on are genuinely great. Every single one of them is the kind of thing I’d recommend to a friend, the kind of thing I’ve kept in my rotation even after finishing my review. They’re that good.

Let’s start at the bottom of the list and work our way up…

9. Unbound Bit Gag (read my full review)

Available at Amazon.com ($39.00)

I was assigned to review this for MEL Magazine and was excited to try out a new-to-me style of gag. I like ballgags well enough, but jaw pain often sets in after a few minutes of wearing one, so I don’t use them as often as I otherwise might, despite both my partner and I finding them hot.

The Bit gag by Unbound surpassed my expectations. Its main component is a silicone bar that you bite onto, and it’s comfortable on both my jaw and my teeth. I find it easier to breathe while using the Bit than while using traditional ballgags, too. I love the aesthetic of the blue velvet ribbon strap, which can be temporarily removed for easier cleaning. This is just a really thoughtfully-designed product and one that I’m glad to have in my collection.

8. Dame Com

Available at SheVibe ($125.00)

It’s hard to make a wand vibe that’ll impress me. I reach for my Doxy Die Cast if I want a gorgeous wand that looks good in pictures, and my Magic Wand Rechargeable if I want a wand that feels good and gets me off; it’s rare that I use others.

But Dame sent me their Com wand and I love it. It’s got a curvy handle that feels more ergonomic for my achy hands, and has a genuinely wonderful, rumbly motor. My one major complaint about it is that the wand’s body shakes quite a bit when the toy is in use, which can get a bit uncomfortable for my hands – but it can make me come pretty reliably and sometimes pretty fast, so I’m willing to accept this fly in the ointment. Well done, Dame!

7. Hole Punch Toys Evolver

Available at Hole Punch Toys (starting at $199.00)

I will never be a gun nut, I’m not into (most) fantasies of peril or threat, and I find guns chilling to be around – and yet, I wanted this gun-shaped dildo from the moment I first saw it, years ago.

Colin, the artisan behind Hole Punch Toys, is a true artist (which, for him, extends beyond the realm of sex toys and into more traditional artistic mediums as well). There was a social media outcry when this toy was launched because people were angry about the mere depiction of a gun, as if depicting something is the same thing as condoning it, revering it. I actually think there’s something quite striking, on an erotic level and an artistic one, about the idea of taking a terrifying object – especially now, in the age of multiple mass shootings per week – and sliding it inside you. Whether that’s a feeling you want is up to you, but I think it’s absurd to decry an artist for making art about a poignant social issue in whatever medium they prefer, and Colin happens to be brilliant at making sex toys.

Anyway, I was lucky enough to finally get my hands on an Evolver this year because my very generous partner bought one for me, and it is truly stunning. It feels weighty and a bit scary in my hand, or when pointed at me – perfect for fear play scenes – and feels pretty good inside me too. And it’s certainly a conversation-starter!

6. Lovense Ferri

Available at SheVibe ($119.00) and Amazon.com ($119.00)

I’ve been super impressed with every toy I’ve tried from Lovense, particularly with the reliability of their Bluetooth connectivity, which makes them highly valuable to me in my kinky long-distance marriage, whether we’re far apart or spending time physically together.

The Ferri is Lovense’s take on a panty vibe. I was frustrated with my previous panty vibe, the We-Vibe Moxie, because it would often lose connection mid-scene even when my partner was controlling it from right beside me. The Ferri has no such issues that I’ve encountered, and has (as Lovense toys generally do) a fabulously strong and rumbly motor. I still don’t think I could ever have an orgasm in a public-play scene, because I’m just too anxious for that and require too much concentration to get off, but it makes for an intriguing tease and feels better than any other panty vibe I’ve tried.

5. Slubb (read my full review)

Available directly from Slubb (about $154 USD)

Pretty sure my partner heard about this one before I did, which is rare, since I’m the one who receives all the sex toy press releases in my inbox every day!

Two German brothers created this sex toy for penises, which consists of an actual, literal power tool – an “oscillating multi-tool,” to be exact – attached to a rubber loop that can be adjusted to fit loosely around a penis. The vibrations this toy produces are like none I’ve ever encountered: they are WILDLY strong (not to mention shockingly loud), which makes the Slubb an especially good addition to kinky play involving D/s, forced orgasms, overstimulation, etc.

I’ve even managed to successfully use the Slubb on my partner through their chastity cage a few times, which is super fun. Basically this is the penis-specific version of mega-strong wands like the Doxy Die Cast, and while it’s certainly not the kind of toy I’d use on a daily or even weekly basis, I’m glad we have it in our collection for those times when it’s exactly what we want.

4. Lovability WaterSlyde (read my full review)

Available at SheVibe ($29.99 USD)

The way that I rank toys in this list is by methodically looking at each item and thinking, “Do I like this better than the toy above it?” and moving it up a slot if so. I shuffle things around like this until I arrive at a list that feels true. I’m explaining this because I was surprised that the WaterSlyde ended up so high on this list, given what a simple invention it is, and yet it definitely deserves this #4 spot for how much pleasure and delight it’s given me.

This is literally just a piece of plastic (albeit a specially-shaped piece of plastic) that you can affix to your bath faucet with a provided ribbon, so as to divert the flow of water onto your clit (or, really, onto any body part you can comfortably position beneath its spout). I found it nostalgic to return to the masturbation method that had given me my very first orgasms back when I was a kid, and was impressed by the thoughtfulness that evidently went into this product’s design. If you love getting off in the tub, you probably need a WaterSlyde.

3. Lovense Exomoon

Available at SheVibe ($99.00) and Amazon.com ($79.00)

Another Lovense toy! They really are quite good.

This one, the Exomoon, is unusually simple for Lovense: it’s a lipstick vibe, i.e. a bullet vibrator made to look vaguely like a tube of lipstick. This makes it somewhat discreet, and super easy to toss into a bag or suitcase for sexy travels, particularly since it has an actual lipstick-style “cap” which protects the tip of the vibe from dust and debris when it’s on.

I don’t tend to use this one with Lovense’s legendarily good Bluetooth functionality because I prefer to take control of my own handheld clitoral vibes for the most part – but its motor, shape, and design are so good that it’s earned a coveted spot in my top drawer and is often the vibe I bring with me when staying away from home overnight. Kudos, Lovense, on another well-engineered product.

2. SnailVibe (read my full review)

Available at SheVibe ($149.99) and Amazon.com ($149.99)

I love when sex toy companies create genuine innovations, rather than just rehashing the same type of toy over and over again, and the SnailVibe is certainly innovative. It’s a dual-stimulation vibe that uses a unique spiraling motion to ensure that the clitoral arm stays in contact with your clit even as you thrust the toy in and out.

The insertable shaft of the toy is long and straight, so it’s better suited for A-spot aficionados than G-spot devotees. And you will go through a lot of lube when using this toy. But it’s one of my absolute faves of the year because it feels great, looks amusingly weird, and does something I’ve never seen another toy do in all my years as a sex toy critic.

1. Unbound Clutch

Available at Amazon.com ($98.00)

Another dual-stimulation toy?! This is almost unheard of, because it’s really, really hard to get a dual-stim toy right. There are so many variables: motor, controls, arm placement, arm functions, ergonomics, thrustability, and so on. But the Unbound Clutch is absolutely worthy of my top spot (wink wink).

The internal arm thrusts in and out slightly, similar to the Stronic toys but even more pronounced in its purposeful jiggling. The clitoral arm is flexible, well-shaped for a broad range of clits, and has a thrillingly rumbly motor. The handle is easy to hold onto, even on days when I’m experiencing a lot of hand pain. All of these components come together to create a toy that can get me off easily, consistently, and intensely – and the whole journey toward that orgasm feels wonderful and unique as well. Congrats to Unbound for making such a terrific product!

Oh yeah, and here’s one more toy – a (dis)honorable mention, if you will:

Lora DiCarlo Baci (read my full review)

Available at Peepshow Toys ($160.00)

I was originally going to choose this as my #1 favorite sex toy of the entire year (!!), but then literally as I was drafting this post, news broke that sex toy company Lora DiCarlo has “quietly ended operations” and has apparently been ghosting their distributors and neglecting to send out customer orders from months ago. Needless to say, this is incredibly unprofessional and not okay!

It’s not as if this is the first time this company has fucked up, either. As Lux Alptraum has reported, the company’s titular founder has repeatedly lied about (or at least misrepresented) the “microrobotic” technology used in their toys, the company’s connections to a prestigious university tech lab, and even her own educational and professional history. Weird stuff.

It’s a pity, because the Baci was probably my most-used toy of any that I received for review purposes this year. Its unique “thrum pad” sets it apart from other pressure-wave toys by providing some extra stimulation to the clitoral shaft and internal clit while the toy’s “mouth” is attending to the tip of the clit. It would have felt odd not to mention it. But I really hope the company fulfills or refunds all remaining orders from customers and distributors; it would be sad (not to mention unfair) if they just disappeared in a puff of proverbial smoke.

There have been scammers in the sex toy industry before and there are lots more to come, I’m sure. All we can really do is enjoy the good toys while they’re around, warn people away from the bad ones, point out companies’ problematic behavior when it happens, and do our best to live lives that are both aligned with our values and as pleasurable as they can be.

Anyway… What were your favorite sex toys this year?

Whimsical Toys at Wacky Prices: Fun Factory’s Cyber Monday Deals!

November 28, 2022November 28, 2022Kate Sloan

Sometimes people say that they feel like “a kid in a candy store” the first time they enter a sex shop, and I’ve never felt that more strongly than I do about Fun Factory toys.

I mean, look at them. They’re colorful, playful and evocative. They’re the very essence of whimsy, in shapes you can fuck yourself with. They’re what would happen if Willy Wonka designed a line of sex products. (Insert “everlasting cocksucker” joke here.)

It may seem extraneous to comment on a toy’s appearance, when (as I’ve said myself in many of my toy reviews) the way it feels is ultimately way more important. But that’s the best part about Fun Factory: their toys look cute and feel fantastic. This combination is alarmingly hard to find in the sex toy biz. And because the Fun Factory aesthetic is so friendly, bright and (yep) fun, I think these toys are especially wonderful picks for people who are often put off by the way sex toys look, whether because they’re grossed out by veiny dildos, intimidated by heavy-handed Fifty Shades-inspired products, or gender-dysphoric about pastel pinks and purples. Fun Factory has the guts to make strange-looking toys galore in shades of lime green, atomic orange, lemon yellow, and many more.

I’m writing this post because the company wanted me to tell you about their Black Friday/Cyber Monday deals, which are just stellar this year. Here are the deets:

Toys on Fun Factory’s website are up to 60% off right now. Check below for my recommendations, but trust me, these are great deals regardless of what you decide to get. ✨
You’ll get a free mini vibrator with any purchase of $120 or more. So you’re getting, quite literally, more bang for your buck. 😍
You’ll get store credit to spend on a later order: $25 when you spend $125, $45 when you spend $175, and $65 when you spend $225 or more. I love when stores do this close to the holidays, because it means you can selflessly buy gifts for your loved ones now, and then selfishly get some extra cash to spend on yourself later. 😎

What’s worth getting from Fun Factory? Honestly, a lot of things. But here are my top recommendations at the moment:

The Stronic Petite ($112.49 with the current sale) is my latest love. Fun Factory’s self-thrusting Stronic toys are much-loved but are all on the larger side, so I was glad that the brand decided to release a smaller version of their signature thrusters. It’s aimed at folks going through menopause, who might find its 1.38″ max diameter more comfortable, but really it’s suitable for anyone who wants a thruster but can’t handle a ton of girth. (Keep in mind, though, that it’s not anal-safe.)
The Manta ($104.99) is one of my favorite penis vibes, and is super fun to use on a partner (or, I would imagine, on oneself). It’s rare to find a vibe as perfectly suited for penile pleasure as this one is; its silicone wings wrap around your shaft, regardless of size, and add some delicious vibration to whatever else you’re doing – or you can even use this toy by itself, concentrating the vibrations on your frenulum or wherever else feels good.
The Magnum dildo ($44.99) is an all-around excellent dildo that works well for lots of different purposes, from solo sex to strap-on play to bathtime fun. It’s got a small-to-average diameter, maxing out at 1.26″, and a longer-than-average length (6.69″ insertable – nice), so it’s comfortable to use in many different positions and holes. Its angled head makes it feel lovely against the G-spot or prostate, too.
The Bootie ($26.24) is an ideal butt plug for anal newbies. It’s small, comfortably shaped, easy to insert and remove, and made of silicone that flexes and bends with your body. I used to suggest it several times a week to would-be anal lovers when they would come into the sex shop I worked at, asking for recommendations.
The Big Boss ($104.99) is a must-have for people who like a lot of sensation. It packs powerfully rumbly vibrations into its overwhelmingly girthy body, such that your G-spot won’t be able to elude it. I love the looped handle, too, as someone who struggles at times to thrust toys as hard and as fast as my greedy G-spot would prefer.

Check out the Fun Factory Black Friday/Cyber Monday deals for yourself, and see whether there’s something you’d like to get for a friend, partner, or just to add to your own collection!

This post was sponsored. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Womanizer OG (A Pressure-Wave Stimulator For Your G-Spot!)

November 14, 2022November 14, 2022Kate Sloan

Ever since the first Womanizer launched years ago, consumers have had plenty of questions about the pressure-wave technology these toys utilized. How does it work? (It sends out rhythmic pulses of air to create a tapping/sucking sensation on the external clit.) Does it feel better than vibration? (Not “better,” exactly, but different, and some people might like it more.) Are pricey pressure-wave toys worth the money? (Possibly, but you’re better off trying a cheaper one initially to see if you like it.)

Another question that’s often been asked about these toys is: Can this technology be used to stimulate areas other than the clit?

The company that originated the technology proved that indeed it can be used for other purposes when they developed the Arcwave, a pressure-wave toy for dicks that focuses on the frenulum. But now, they’ve expanded the scope of their offerings and launched the Womanizer OG, a toy that uses pressure-waves on your G-spot. Is it any good? Let’s talk about it.

Things I like about the Womanizer OG

The OG combines pressure-waves with vibration, which has always been a pretty successful combination when Womanizer’s attempted it before, and is successful here too. They feel good together, though I have some concerns about the fact that they can’t be used separately from one another (more on that below).
On that note, the vibration quality is exactly what my G-spot tends to crave: deep and rumbly, no matter which of the three vibration intensities you’re on. This makes it less likely to activate an annoying or painful “need-to-pee” feeling when I press it against my G-spot, and makes blended orgasms easier to achieve.
The “mouth” of the toy has been expanded from Womanizers’ typical clit-sized dimensions; it’s longer, wider, and flatter, so as to stimulate your G-spot better. This could also potentially make it better for folks with bigger clits who want a pressure-wave toy they can use either internally or externally (the manual recommends warming up by using the OG on your clit before using it internally).
The curve of the toy’s body is well-designed: it’s ergonomic to hold, and to thrust with, but (at least for my particular anatomy) the handle doesn’t get in the way of my clit too much and I can still use a clitoral vibe or touch my clit with my fingers while the OG is inside me.
The OG has “Smart Silence,” a feature where the toy shuts off when you move it away from your skin and starts up again when you make contact. This isn’t super relevant for a G-spot toy because it’s (presumably) going to be inside you most of the time that you’re using it, but it’s nice if, for example, you need to suddenly pull the toy out of you and go answer the door for the mail delivery person or something, and don’t have time to hold down the “off” button for a few seconds. Also, Smart Silence can be turned off if you don’t like it.
The toy also has an “Afterglow” feature where, if you press the “minus” button for one second, the toy jumps back down to its lowest intensity. This feature is intended to prevent painful overstimulation that can happen during and after orgasm.
The manual and promotional materials for the OG are all very clear on two key points: that the G-spot is more of a G-zone, and that clitoral stimulation is crucial for most vagina-owners even if their G-spot is being stimulated well. I genuinely appreciate sex toy companies who provide accurate information to their consumers, instead of constantly hyping up their product’s virtues at the risk of making some users feel “broken” for not experiencing the toy as instantaneously orgasmic.
It comes in a few not-especially-gendered colors. The “slate” shade is your best bet if you loathe traditional sex toy pinks and purples.
The silicone covering the toy is smooth, soft, and plays well with water-based lube.
Like most pressure-wave toys these days, the OG is waterproof, so you can take it in the shower or bath and don’t need to worry you’ll ruin it while washing it.

Things I don’t like about the Womanizer OG

Most annoyingly for me, you can’t use the pressure-waves separately from the vibration – and I actually wonder if this was done on purpose, to mask the relative ineffectiveness of pressure-waves on the G-spot. I can’t feel much when the toy is in use aside from the vibration, which (don’t get me wrong) feels good, but isn’t exactly a revolutionary sensation. I asked Womanizer about this and they said the pressure-waves and vibration “are always simultaneous, but if you want to focus on one feature more than the other, you can turn it down to the lowest level,” and indeed, there are three different vibration settings which can be controlled separately from the intensity of the pressure-waves. But there’s no way to turn the vibrations off altogether, and even on the lowest level, the pressure-waves feel drowned out by vibration so I can’t give a definitive statement on whether they actually feel good alone.
The OG retails for $199–219 (depending on where you get it from) and I find that price hard to justify, given that – to my seasoned vagina, anyhow – it doesn’t feel that different from a great G-spot vibrator like the Lelo Mona 2 ($169), Swan Wand ($116) or We-Vibe Rave ($113). I understand that the pressure-wave technology must be more expensive to implement, but if it’s barely discernible over the vibrations then I’m not sure it was worth implementing, or that it’s worth paying extra for.
The phrase “simultaneous stimulation” is used a lot in the marketing for the OG, which – in conjunction with its almost C-shaped body – might make some consumers think it can stimulate your G-spot and your clit at the same time, which it can’t (or at least can’t do well). The “simultaneous stimulation” being referred to is the vibration and pressure-waves being applied simultaneously to your G-spot.
The marketing copy also says that the toy is “flexible,” allowing for “a comfortable, custom fit,” but it is not. I can bend it maybe half an inch, if that, before it starts to feel like I might snap it in half if I push harder. That’s enough flex to potentially make it more comfortable to thrust in and out, but since a lot of people’s G-spots prefer firm, steady pressure, I’m not sure flexibility was a good choice for this toy anyway.
The manual notes, “Smart Silence may not work when the stimulation head is wet. Therefore, please make sure not to apply lube into the Pleasure Air head.” This is baffling to me. If you’re designing a toy specifically to go into the vagina, all of its features should work regardless of how wet it gets – and if that’s not possible, that feature shouldn’t be offered on that toy.
The big, wide mouth is hard to clean, and inevitably gets caked with vag gunk in short order. This isn’t a detriment operationally because the toy is waterproof and will keep chugging away regardless of how much cum gets into it (except for the Smart Silence feature, as described above), but you will need to have some kind of scrub brush on hand when you wash it after use (an old toothbrush works great) and it can be hard to tell if you’ve actually cleaned it thoroughly or not.
Speaking of the toy’s mouth, it’s not well-shaped for clitoral stimulation (at least for my clit, which I’d say is on the larger end of average but not large-large), so despite what the toy’s manual recommends, I haven’t been able to get myself turned on for an OG session by first using it on my clit. It just doesn’t form a seal the way normal clitoral Womanizers do for me, so the stimulation is almost imperceptible.
The name is bad. “Womanizer” in itself is still a pretty shitty brand name, and “OG” (presumably a reference to “original gangster,” yikes) doesn’t make sense as a name because usually it means that something is “the original,” the first iteration of itself, whereas the OG is a much-evolved pressure-wave toy that bears little resemblance to the first Womanizers. But I’m a pedant, so.

Final thoughts

Don’t get me wrong: I can orgasm easily and consistently with the Womanizer OG, when it’s paired with a clitoral vibe. If you like G-spot vibrators, or have reason to believe you might, then you’d probably like the OG.

The problem is, I just don’t think it feels different enough from any other good-quality G-spot vibrator to warrant its hype and high price tag. Or maybe my G-spot just isn’t sensitive enough to detect a difference – but if that’s the case, I imagine that’s true of most people’s G-spots, since that area isn’t nearly as enervated as the external clitoris to begin with.

As with the Arcwave, I have to commend Womanizer for taking a big risk on a new and innovative way of utilizing pressure-waves, but I’m just not sure it works as well as they hoped. If they choose to make more pressure-wave G-spot toys in the future, I hope they’re able to focus on the pressure-waves themselves, not just vibrations, so that users can actually feel the fancy technology they’re splurging on.

If you want a fantastic Womanizer, get the Premium 2 and put it on your clit. If you want an excellent G-spot vibrator, get a Lelo Mona 2. If you want to feel pressure-waves on your G-spot and have some cash to spend, feel free to give the OG a shot – but I’m hopeful that this isn’t the last we’ll hear about G-spot pressure-waves, and that future iterations will emphasize the pleasures of pressure-waves instead of overpowering them with vibration, rumbly and pleasurable though it may be.

Thanks to Womanizer for sending me this toy to try! They didn’t pay me to write this review. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Utimi Hands-Free Automatic Penis Pump

October 11, 2022October 14, 2022Kate Sloan

When my partner and I tested the Utimi hands-free automatic penis pump together for the first time over FaceTime, and we were trying to decide whether they should use the included cock ring with the pump or not, I said, “Well, how would you normally use a penis pump?” and they said, “I’ve never used one, so I wouldn’t know.” For some reason I had 100% assumed that they would have tried one at least once before, even though they didn’t actually own one before getting this one.

I think that’s just because I can’t imagine not having a clit pump in my sex toy arsenal. It does something that no other type of toy can really do. Sure, there are some toys which claim to be “clit suckers,” but those are actually using pressure-wave technology for the most part, which is different. I like that the clit pump almost forces me to become aroused – first physically, and then (if I’m in the right frame of mind) mentally – by engorging my clit with blood, essentially creating an artificial clitoral erection. Pressure-wave toys like Womanizer don’t typically do this, or at least not as consistently.

In much the same way, many pleasure-oriented “suction” products for penises do some sort of rhythmic contraction/intermittent tightening, which isn’t quite the same as what a penis pump provides: consistent, insistent suction over the entire length of the dick. The difference matters, because of the effects that can be achieved with each. Penis pumps aren’t necessarily pleasurable; they aren’t designed to be, in the way that some of those “blowjob simulator”-type toys are. Pumps are mostly used either for encouraging a nominal amount of penis growth over a long period of regular use (the effectiveness of which is debatable), or for addressing erectile dysfunction.

The way they work is, you put on a cock ring and then put a lubed-up pump on and start gradually pumping air out of it, which pulls blood into your dick – and since the blood is trapped in there by the ring around the base, this hopefully helps you achieve a boner even if you otherwise struggle to do so. Some experts even think that doing this regularly can increase your overall erection quality, whether or not you choose to use the pump before any given sex or masturbation session.

Though erectile dysfunction isn’t a problem they deal with, my partner was more than willing to test out the Utimi hands-free automatic penis pump so I could review it. Let’s talk about it.

What is the Utimi hands-free automatic penis pump?

Broadly speaking, there are two types of penis pumps: manual and electronic. The manual ones involve hand-pumping air, while the electronic (or “automatic”) types do the pumping for you, at the press of a button.

This Utimi pump is of the latter type; it’s a rechargeable electronic penis pump. Here are some of the things my partner and I like and dislike about it.

Things I like about this toy:

I have to say, it fucking works. The gif to the left made me cackle out loud when I first saw it, because it’s so cartoonish and obviously fake, but when I actually saw my partner use this toy on FaceTime for the first time – starting from almost totally flaccid – the transformation was nearly as fast and as intense as the one pictured in this gif. This pump really does kind of conjure a boner out of thin air, and combined with a cock ring, that boner can have staying power. Good news for ED sufferers!
It’s nice that it comes with a cock ring, as well as a bottle of water-based lube. These are accessories that everyone should have on hand when using a penis pump, so it’s super convenient that they’re included.
The controls are simple, and easy to learn: there’s an on/off button that also functions as a “pause” button when short-pressed, as well as a “+” button, a “–” button, and a quick-release button.
The quick-release is manual, not electronic, as it should be – and it works. Never buy a penis pump where the pressure release has to be done electronically, as this could be very dangerous if the electronics fail mid-session for whatever reason.
There are measurements printed along the shaft of the pump, like a ruler. This is cool because it lets you see just how much your dick is actually growing, plus it could potentially be fun to use as part of a small penis humiliation scene or somesuch.
In addition to two soft endcaps that make the base of the pump more comfy when it’s pressed against your pubic mound, this pump also comes with another endcap designed to look like a vulva. There’s no texture or anything on the inside – this ain’t no Fleshlight – but it does provide a nice visual if you’re into pussies, and it’s also more cushioned than the other two endcaps, so it’d be a good pick if you find the pump’s edges too pokey around the base of your dick.
The components of the toy can be disassembled for easier cleaning. Everything except the motor component is water-resistant.

Things I don’t like about this toy:

I don’t feel able to say with 100% certainty that this pump is safe to use. I interviewed a penis pump expert for a piece I wrote for MEL a few months ago, and he said that pumps should always have a gauge which tells you how much pressure is being exerted at any given time, so that you can know for sure that you’re staying within a safe zone. This pump offers no way to monitor the pressure.
The pressure is also way too intense, even on the first of its four suction settings. My partner found it unpleasantly tight, and said it was “like a different version of CBT” (cock and ball torture). Each setting escalates, starting at a low amount of pressure and working its way up – and if you manage to press the pause button at the moment you’ve reached your ideal amount of pressure, you can keep it there, and then gradually increase it as needed by unpausing and then quickly pausing it again. But this level of manipulation really shouldn’t be necessary to achieve a safe and comfortable amount of pressure, and there should be less intense settings available to use.
The pussy endcap is made of TPE, a porous material, meaning it will eventually break down and will hold onto bacteria no matter how much you wash it. This isn’t typically as big of a deal for people with penises because they’re usually less prone to infections, etc. than vaginas are, but it’s worth knowing about, especially if you plan on sharing the toy.
Although Utimi emphasizes the toy’s transparentness as a selling point because it gives you a view of the dick inside, there’s a strange diamond pattern on some sections of the tube which obscures the dick visually. This seems unnecessary and I wish it were see-through all the way around.
The construction feels cheap – the motor end of the toy doesn’t screw onto the tube with threads, but rather, just stays in place due to tension from the tube, so it could easily fall apart mid-session. You could put it back together just fine, but it’s pretty annoying to even have to do that.

Final thoughts:

I don’t think the Utimi hands-free automatic penis pump is safe for most users, and especially not for beginners to pumping, because it gives you minimal control over how much pressure is being exerted, and doesn’t have a pressure gauge.

However, if you’re a pumping veteran and are good at paying attention to your body’s signals and knowing when to stop, you may be able to make use of the “pause” function on this toy to achieve your desired amount of suction without much effort. It’s also worth noting that electronic penis pumps are more accessible than manual ones for people who struggle to do the hand-pumping motion due to disability, strength issues, chronic pain, etc.

Utimi makes another penis pump that does have a pressure gauge on its LCD screen, so that might be a good option (and for some reason it’s actually cheaper than this one), but I haven’t tried it out so I can’t say for sure. But in general, especially for beginners, I’d recommend a manual penis pump with a non-digital pressure gauge, as these are safer to use and tend to give you more control over your experience.

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Upko Invisible Mouth Gag

September 20, 2022October 10, 2022Kate Sloan

Many people enjoy the power imbalance and sense of vulnerability that can be created when one partner wears a gag during a kink scene, whether it be a ballgag, a bit gag, or some other type. But a common issue with gags is that – of course – your mouth isn’t really useable or fuckable while there’s a big piece of silicone shoved into it.

Various makers of BDSM gear have attempted to address this with inventive open-mouth gag designs, and some kinksters even repurpose Jennings gags, which help dentists keep patients’ mouths wide open during oral surgeries. But a brand called Upko took an approach to this problem that I’ve never seen before, by selling an “invisible” gag that simultaneously prevents you from talking and keeps your mouth agape and useable. Let’s talk about it.

What is this gag and how does it work?

The Upko Invisible Mouth Gag comes in two main pieces, which attach at the back of the head via a strap.

Each piece features a rounded-off silicone wedge that you’re meant to bite down on, so that the gag mostly stays in place due to the pressure of your teeth. As a result, the middle of your mouth is left wide open.

You’re welcome for these extremely attractive photos 😇

A note on drool

In my experience, all gags promote drooling. I think this is due to the combination of having a foreign object in your mouth and no longer having the ability to swallow your spit as much or as easily.

A lot of people get nervous about wearing gags because they’re embarrassed at the thought of drooling profusely. However, if your partner is into the idea of you wearing a gag, odds are good that they’re also into the idea of you drooling. A lot of the kinky pleasure of using gags is about the vulnerability they create in the wearer, which can (optionally) tie into kinks like humiliation and objectification. For many doms, it’s super hot to see their sub drooling uncontrollably with a gag in. If you’re not sure how your partner feels about drooling during sex/kink, ask them – you might be surprised at what they say!

For similar reasons, you probably don’t need to worry about looking weird/ugly while wearing a gag. Like, yes, it’s not the most flattering look by conventional beauty standards, but plenty of kinksters aren’t that interested in conventional beauty standards anyway, as evidenced by how many doms adore the appearance of smeared lipstick, ruined mascara, ripped tights, etc. during scenes. You’ll enjoy yourself more while wearing a gag if you can accept that looking pretty is not the point – or that maybe looking vulnerable and subby is looking pretty, in the eyes of your dom.

Things I like about this gag

While we’re talking about drool: I drool a lot with this gag in. I think the open-mouth design makes it much easier for drool to spill out, which my partner finds hot.
The gag is relatively comfortable during use, which I wasn’t expecting. I find it less invasive and unsettling to bite down on a gag with my teeth than to have it shoved far back on my tongue, which tends to make me gag in the not-fun way. It doesn’t hurt my teeth, either, because the silicone you’re biting into is very squishy.
With this gag in, my mouth is indeed open wide enough that I can get face-fucked or give oral sex, especially if I bite down on the gag with my very back teeth. I wasn’t able to continue a blowjob “to completion” with the gag in, though, because it eventually got uncomfortable and made me feel like I was gonna puke (which, to be fair, would probably happen with any gag), so I just took it out to finish the job.
I really like the idea of this gag, having never really seen a design quite like it. Since the effectiveness and comfort of a gag really depend on your specific mouth and what it can handle, it’s good that there are plenty of different gag styles out there for different people to experiment with. If ballgags and bit gags have been untenably uncomfortable for you, it’s possible that this style of gag would work better.
The back strap is adjustable, with 8 different tightnesses to choose from, so this gag should fit a broad range of head sizes and tightness preferences.
I like that the part that goes in your mouth is made of silicone. Rubber gags, which are still sadly pretty common, are porous, meaning that they hold onto any bacteria that gets into their pores and can never be fully cleaned. Obviously, this really isn’t ideal for something that goes into your mouth, especially since the bacteria build-up can also lead to weird tastes and smells. All of that is avoided when the gag is made of silicone, as this one is, because silicone is non-porous and you can wash it and/or sanitize it in the same ways you’d clean any other silicone sex toy (just make sure to separate the silicone parts from the leather parts first).
The aesthetic is classic and cute. Red, black, and gold is a color combo that reminds me (regrettably) of Christian Grey, but I have to admit it looks good and would match a lot of people’s bedroom decor and plenty of other bondage equipment.
This gag is small and slim compared to a traditional ballgag, so it might be better for tossing into a suitcase or purse for on-the-go kink play (and might not be as immediately recognizable as a gag to nosy relatives or TSA agents).
My only other association with biting down on a squishy-but-firm object that keeps my mouth open is being at the dentist, so I can see how this gag would work excellently for dentistry-related roleplays. (Horny dentist taking advantage of their innocent patient, anyone?)
It’s really, really easy for the person wearing the gag to just spit it out or let it fall out if they want to. This can be a good thing if you’re a beginner and/or nervous about using a gag, because you can un-gag yourself quickly and without assistance if you need to.

Things I don’t like about this gag

As mentioned above, it’s very easy for the wearer to spit the gag out or let it fall out at any time, which you might not appreciate if you’re into gagging that feels forced or inescapable. The gag also fell out accidentally a few times while I was testing it, which was annoying, as we had to pause the scene to put it back in, and would’ve had to go rinse it off if it had fallen on the floor.
For some unfathomable reason, the parts of the gag that you actually bite down on can be separated from the long pieces of silicone attaching them to the straps. This strikes me as a choking hazard, since – if you bit down hard enough and tugged on the gag straps at just the right angle – the parts could separate and then you’d have a big piece of silicone just… loose in your mouth. For that reason, this gag doesn’t feel super safe to me and I would be hesitant to use it during any kind of rough play.
When I gave my partner oral sex while this gag was in, they reported that it didn’t feel as good as usual because I couldn’t apply as much suction and my teeth were more in the way than they might normally be. The visual of my drooly gagged mouth made up for these deficits for them, though – and also, their dick is pretty girthy, so I think small-to-average penises would have an easier time fitting into the mouth of someone wearing this gag.
The instructions that come with the gag are minimal and poorly written. Since its design is unusual, I think clearer instruction is warranted. There’s also no safety info in the instructions, other than a warning that you should agree on a safe-signal (a non-verbal safeword) before you start. That’s good advice, but given that gags are risky to use and this one is especially so, it’s worrisome that there are no other safety warnings/tips in the instructions.
While Upko assures me that the straps are made of real Italian leather – and actually produced importation documents to prove it – the leather doesn’t feel as buttery-soft and high-quality as some of my nicer leather kink gear (for example, anything made by Aslan Leather). But it’s still nice that it’s actual leather.
I don’t think this product should cost $79.99, which is its current retail price on the Upko website. For comparison, a couple of other silicone gags I enjoy – the Zalo red rose one and the Unbound Bit – go for $65 and $39, respectively, and are better-constructed than this one. Personally I wouldn’t pay more than $40 for a gag like this.

Final thoughts

While the Upko Invisible Mouth Gag is beautiful and is certainly different from any other gag in my collection, I think it’s way too expensive and kind of a safety hazard. I’d only recommend it if you love its design and/or think it would be comfier for you than traditional gag styles. Or if you want to do a dentistry roleplay, in which case, open wide and say “aaah!”

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

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