I’m Surprised By How Much I Love This Little Lelo Vibe

Please excuse any pinkish stains you may see on the toy in these photos; they are not the toy’s fault, I just let it ride around in a makeup bag that had some red lipstick remnants inside it and I am notorious for liking longwear lipsticks that are difficult to remove, haha.

My very first “luxury” sex toy purchase, back when I was a teenager, was the Lelo Nea. I saved up for it for months and was wildly excited when I finally got to take it home from my local feminist sex shop.

Still to this day, the shape of Nea – which is the exact same shape as some of Lelo’s other clitoral vibes, including the Lily – is one of my favorites for clitoral stimulation. I love the way its tip is narrower than its body but not so narrow as to be pointy or uncomfortable. I love the way it curves over my mons and down onto my clit, seeming to fit seamlessly against my vulva whether I’m using it solo or during penetrative sex. I love that it’s small enough to be thrown into my toiletries bag when I travel but not so small that I’m likely to lose it.

But the original Nea didn’t really deliver in terms of vibration strength or rumbliness, which is why I was so excited to be offered the Lelo Lily 3. It’s everything I loved about the Nea, but with a noticeably better motor. And as I’ve written before, the motor matters more than any other trait of a vibrator, so this makes a huge difference.

When I’m at home and I want to get off, I almost always use the Eroscillator or a wand vibe like the Magic Wand Rechargeable or Fun Factory Vim. All of these are strong and dependable, both in the sense of “being dependably able to make me come” and in the sense of “dependably not dying mid-use” – the Eroscillator plugs into an electrical outlet, the Vim has an impressively long battery life before needing to be recharged, and the MWR can be used while it’s charging, should it come to that.

Now, comparatively, the Lily 3 isn’t that great – it has a battery life of about 2 hours – but I bring this up only to say that it’s hard for me to find a rechargeable, travel-friendly vibe that I trust enough to bring with me on a trip, especially a trip where suitcase space is limited. The We-Vibe Tango X is my favorite one in this category, for many reasons, but the Lily 3 has worked its way onto my list of acceptable options, which is hard to do. In fact, at this point I’ve brought it with me as my only vibe for many overnight stays (e.g. when I go over to my parents’ house to visit them and anticipate having phone sex with my spouse when I go to bed), and it has never once disappointed me or made me wish I’d brought a different vibe.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that it’s super-powerful. If you’re used to wands or similar, this almost certainly won’t be enough for you. But what I find enjoyable is its rumbliness, which it maintains throughout its 10 vibration intensities. The smooth ABS plastic translates the vibrations well, which helps, too. I think another thing that makes this vibe so successful for me is one of the few things Lelo has always excelled at: this toy starts at a very low intensity and works its way up to a much higher one. This ultimately results in less desensitization over the course of a session, so that I don’t require as much power to get off and can feel the orgasm more vividly when it does happen. It’s a small thing that makes a big difference.

The Lily 3 is also very quiet, and is waterproof, meaning it’s ideal for surreptitious/discreet play or masturbating in the bath or shower, and is even the kind of thing I’d bring with me to my local sex club if I hoped to get up to some shenanigans in the swimming pool there.

The button layout is easy to understand, a relic from a simpler time in the sex toy industry: the button on the right turns up the vibration intensity if you press or hold it, and the one on the left turns it down. You can switch between its 10 vibration patterns by quickly double-pressing the right-side button, and you can adjust the intensity of any pattern, which is a great feature that always makes me way more likely to actually use patterns instead of just sticking with the steady vibration mode like I normally do. The patterns are good, as far as patterns go – some are too slow for my tastes, but many are steadily rhythmic and can feel really good.

Lelo has made a lot of missteps in their time, and one of them is that they tend to overcomplicate things, making vibrators that have a bunch of unnecessary bells and whistles that no one asked for. (I have been trying, and failing, to enjoy the new Lelo Dot Cruise, for example, in large part because of its “Cruise” function which is still inconsistent and terrible, despite the fact that the toy costs fucking $200.)

But the Lelo Lily 3 only costs $76, and it bucks that trend. It’s what Lelo does best: a simple, elegant, ergonomic vibrator with a wide array of settings, a respectable motor, and a luxurious “it factor” that makes you feel fancy and deliciously self-indulgent just for using it. It’s my favorite thing Lelo has put out since the Sila, their wide-mouthed pressure-wave toy that I adore.

It’s not earthshatteringly powerful or terribly unique. It doesn’t attempt to innovate or defy expectations. The Lelo Lily 3 is just a damn good clitoral vibrator, and writing this review has made me want to use it again, which is a good sign in and of itself.

 

Lelo didn’t pay me to write this review, they just sent me the product and I liked it. You know the drill: as always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Butt Plugs Are Surprisingly Versatile

Pictured: the Godemiche Plug B in raspberry cream glitter (have you ever seen such a gorgeous plug?!)

Did you know that the all-time most popular post on this entire blog (out of nearly 1,300 posts) is about activities that are more fun when you’re wearing a butt plug? People are very curious about this topic, apparently.

That being said, even 7 years after writing that post, I’m still regularly amazed by the versatility of butt plugs. Let me explain.

A lot of sex toys require you to use them actively – you hold a vibrator against yourself, thrust a dildo in and out, move a stroker up and down. Sure, some of these toys can be used in a more passive manner, especially with the help of accessories like a wand vibrator clamp or a fucking machine, but apart from that, generally you have to be doing something in order to use this type of toy.

A well-designed butt plug is different because you can “set it and forget it” – although, of course, if it feels particularly good then you may not really be able to “forget it”!

One of the ways I use butt plugs most frequently these days is wearing one while receiving oral sex (or while having cunnilingus-focused phone sex, as the case may be). I don’t always have the energy or the vaginal ambition to thrust a dildo against my G-spot or A-spot, but clitoral pleasure on its own doesn’t always feel stimulating enough for a super-satisfying experience. Enter the humble butt plug. Like a dildo, it gives me something to squeeze around when clitoral stimulation makes my pelvic muscles contract, thereby intensifying orgasms and the lead-up to them – but unlike a dildo, I don’t need to move it or even touch it once it’s inserted (provided, again, that it’s well-designed enough to stay put, which, sadly, not all plugs are).

Wearing a butt plug makes me much more aware of every little twitch and contraction of my vaginal muscles, which is why it’s so stellar when paired with oral. But for the same reason, it also makes a spanking or other sadomasochistic scene feel all the more arousing. I never noticed how much my genital muscles squeeze and pulse when I’m receiving pain until I started wearing a butt plug during these scenes sometimes – the plug pretty much forces me to notice it!

Another way I frequently use butt plugs is as motivation for completing certain tasks. My partner, who is very clever, will sometimes tell me to insert a plug if I need to clean my room or do various other chores. Much like wearing a collar around my neck, the plug serves as a constant reminder of what I’m meant to be doing, because I can’t really “tune out” the sensation of wearing one – it’s always there, drawing attention to itself, so that if I get sidetracked or demotivated, it’s never too long before I go, “Oh wait, yeah, I’m supposed to be tidying. Let’s get back to that.” Other adult toys can certainly be motivating too – promising me a wand-vibe orgasm when I finish writing an article is a good way to make sure it gets done, for instance – but I find none so easy to seamlessly incorporate into the task itself as a butt plug.

For me, butt plugs also work well for generating arousal passively, even if I’m not doing anything sexual at all. Sometimes my partner will tell me to wear a plug while we watch a TV show or a movie together, and usually by the time we’re done watching, I’m turned on, even if there was nothing sexual in the media we consumed. This is super useful, especially since a combination of chronic pain, depression, and having responsive desire can make it hard for me to “get in the mood” even when I want to. Butt plugs are kind of a life hack in this way.

Plenty of people use butt plugs as a warm-up for anal sex or larger anal penetration, and I’ve used them that way from time to time too. But since I prefer anal penetration on the smaller end of the spectrum for the most part, usually a plug itself is enough for me. I’m always glad to have packed one in my suitcase when I travel to see my partner, because we always end up using it in myriad ways. Gotta love a product that’s equally enjoyable during a cunnilingus session, a heavy flogging, or a trip to the grocery store!

 

This post was sponsored. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Behind the Seams: A Whole Lotta Pink!

October 28, 2022

This is maybe one of the most masc-looking outfits I’ve ever posted on here. I’ve been asking my hairdresser to cut my hair progressively shorter and shorter over the last couple years, and every time I get more of it chopped off, I feel queerer, in a really good way. It’s still sometimes a bit of a challenge to feel as femme as I want to when my hair is this short, but makeup helps – and I think that the colorful, bi-as-fuck eyeshadow look I did with this outfit balanced out the rest of it really well.

I wore this to run some errands and then record a bonus episode of The Dildorks (which are all available to $12+ patrons on our Patreon, incase you were wondering!).

 

What I’m wearing:

• “2 gay 2 live, 2 horny 2 die” tank top – made by Cayce Fisher but I can’t seem to find a link to it anymore, sorry!
• Black high-waisted jeans – Madewell
Pink leather Coach Cashin Carry tote (I truly love this bag so you will see it a lot in this post!) – a gift from my love
• Black leather Converse Chuck Taylors
• Apple Watch with red leather strap
• Berry-pink KN95 mask – MaskC


January 28, 2023

I wore this to go with my friends Dan and Sarah to a birthday party we were all invited to. I wanted to dress in the bisexual pride colors (blue, purple, and pink) because both of the people whose birthday it was are bi (I think?) and both of them wear a lot of bright colors, especially purple. Love a themed outfit!

This blue shirt is a bit tricky to style because it’s so low-cut, but I liked the trick of wearing a bralette underneath that gave a little pop of color and a bit of cleavage coverage, because I was just not feeling up to showing that much boob!

 

What I’m wearing:

• Raspberry-pink merino wool cardigan – the Gap
• Blue low-cut tank top – a gift from my friend Sarah
• Deep pink lace bralette – the Gap
• Black skater skirt (with pockets!) – ASOS
• Black leggings – H&M
• My custom Nikes/high-femme clown shoes (more on them in this post)
• My sub’s chastity key on a chain


February 1, 2023

I wore this out to get my hair done. My hairdresser, Paul, has been doing my hair since I was about 12 years old (!!), and he’s a fellow member of the LGBTQ+ community who has wonderful style, so I usually like to dress a little wacky to go see him.

Later that night, my friend/roommate Sarah and I got together for one of our regular get-togethers over drinks. Always fun to sit around chatting with my pal, getting tipsy, catching up on each other’s lives, petting the cats, and (often) watching videos of our mutual favorite video-game YouTuber, QuinBoBin.

 

What I’m wearing:

• Pink knit beanie – Only, via The Bay (I bought the same one in a gorgeous kelly-green shade as well and wore both of them a ton in the winter and early spring)
• Black T-shirt – probably from the Hippo Campus merch store?
• Hot pink cashmere sweater – J. Crew
• Black skater skirt – ASOS
• Black leggings – H&M
• Pink leather Coach Cashin Carry tote
• Pink metallic cowboy boots – Jeffrey Campbell
• My go-to winter coat, a black wool/cashmere-blend Fairweather pea coat that I thrifted in 2007 (!!!) and have worn nearly every winter since then
• Black KN95 mask


February 4, 2023

I wore this to attend a lovely party held by the great Samantha Fraser. who always throws a hell of a bash. This one was summer-themed and had the vibe of a tropical vacation – complete with refreshing cocktails and leis! – and I had a fantastic time catching up with a bunch of people I hadn’t seen in ages.

However, unfortunately then I FAINTED! I was literally mid-conversation with someone and started to feel intensely dizzy and had to excuse myself mid-sentence, which was super embarrassing, and then I collapsed in the kitchen. Not my finest moment. In retrospect, I think it may have been a POTS-related incident (I’m not diagnosed with POTS yet but strongly suspect I have it, and am going to get checked out by a cardiologist soon to verify). Everyone was very nice and understanding about it, and my friends Sarah and Dan came to keep me company in a bedroom upstairs while I waited out the weird disorientation and dizziness, and then took me home. Oh well, at least I had a good time until I fainted!

 

What I’m wearing:

• World’s best jumpsuit – Le Chateau; I had it hemmed because I’m a shorty
• Pink metallic cowboy boots – Jeffrey Campbell
• Red heart-shaped bag – Kate Spade
Blue ukulele earrings – 3DelightfulShop on Etsy


February 11, 2023

I wore this to the Erotic Arts & Crafts Fair, always a fantastic event. Some of the highlights this time were having a custom love poem written for us on the spot by a cool person with a typewriter, picking up another leather bookmark from L’Amour-Propre (I already had one but can always use more), and seeing some previews of the Vibrating Tarot, a sex toy tarot deck that’s in the works.

After getting home from the fair, I stayed in this same outfit to record the video for my song-of-the-week “Billionaire,” which is about Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos and how no one should be allowed to accrue that much money when there is so much needless suffering in this world due to poverty.

 

What I’m wearing:

• Pink knit beanie – Only
• Pink T-shirt featuring a cartoon of a dominatrix holding a whip (apparently the artist is named Etienne) – the gift shop at the Leather Archives & Museum, a must-visit for any kinksters who visit Chicago
Pink cardigan – Beninos
• Black jeans – Madewell
• Pink leather Coach Cashin Carry tote
• Pink metallic cowboy boots – Jeffrey Campbell (they don’t seem to be making the pink ones anymore, unfortunately, but they are making red ones!)
• Teal-blue leather dog collar – Tiffany’s, a gift from my love
• Black KN95 mask because COVID is bad

 

Want more posts like this? Check out the Beauty & Fashion category!

How Being a Sugar Baby Helped Me Get Over Some Old Insecurities

Pictured in November 2017, during my very brief foray into sugar dating

One of my biggest fears, when I was growing up, was that no romantic prospect would ever be able to see past my looks and love me for my personality. Popular media had hammered home the idea for me that appearances mattered more than anything else, and I considered myself to have a mediocre face and a mediocre body at best, so it seemed impossible that I would ever be loved or desired in the ways I wanted to be.

Of course, I grew up and discovered that the reality of dating was a bit different than I’d been led to believe. Not only do personalities matter as much as, or more than, looks for many people, but it turns out that plenty of folks actually think I’m hot and pretty. Who’da thunk!

That being said, the hangups that plague us at a young age often stay with us for a long time, even if life experience and self-reflection have both taught us that those hangups are unhelpful and based on falsehoods. So it still surprised me, well into my twenties, when someone I thought was attractive would express that they also found me attractive. Hell, even now, at 31, I sometimes still narrow my eyes when someone cute expresses desire for me, like, How do I know you’re not lying, though?

I still vividly remember the moment I received an initial email from the man who would become my short-lived sugar daddy, because it soothed these insecurities like an ice pack held to a bruise. I was at my optometrist’s office, of all places, sitting in the waiting room.

The email was wordy and polite, explaining that he had heard my podcast and read my blog and followed my Twitter for quite some time, but had only just learned that I offered audio-chat sessions for a fee. (I don’t think this is something I’d still do now, BTW, unless the remuneration was significant, but back then I still had the time and energy for such things.) He was interested in setting up a phone chat to discuss “our relative perspectives on sexuality,” and also to do some phone sex-type stuff if I was up for that. He lived in New York and I lived in Toronto, so our dynamic would be limited to the phone for the time being, though the possibility of in-person meetups was later floated, provided we hit it off via audio.

He’d included some photos and personal details and I found him quite handsome and impressive, in a way that awakened my impostor syndrome from its intermittent slumber. This man wanted to pay for my time? Seriously? I wasn’t a smoking-hot porn performer, or a finessed escort like the ladies at https://www.toronto-escorts.com/, or one of those slim, blonde, well-manicured women you might see on a sugar-dating website. I was just… me.

And here we arrive at one of the central lessons I took away from my time as a sugar baby, which ended up lasting only about a month before he called it off due to jealousy about my other partners (a bummer at the time, but ultimately for the best). I learned that not only was I desirable, but I was desirable enough to be worth spending money on.

That may sound like a weird distinction to make, but money is, in many ways, far more tangible than much of the other attention I’d received from suitors in the past. That’s not to say it’s better – I’d generally rather receive a well-tailored, flirty compliment from someone cute than a crisp hundred, although frankly it depends on the day – but I found it more believable, because money is… well, it’s currency. It’s cold hard cash, and it tells the cold hard truth. Someone might give a compliment they don’t really mean; people do it all the time. But if someone decides to pay me money for the privilege of spending time with me, or seeing photos of me, or whatever, then it’s extremely unlikely that they’re faking their enthusiasm for any reason. Money, as they say, doesn’t lie.

There’s a lot of Discourse™ about whether sex work is “empowering,” which I generally think is ridiculous. Few other professions are held to that standard, of needing to be ~empowering~ in order to be valid, respectable, and worthy of rights and protections.

But at the same time, few jobs I’ve ever had have felt as actively empowering to me as being a sugar baby did. I was being paid to be myself, being paid because someone liked who I was, inside and out. Not much else was required of me, besides the emotional labor of being in a relationship-type-thing, which I’d long given away for free to Tinder fuckboys and Twitter crushes who didn’t necessarily deserve it. During our phone calls, I could wear the things I liked wearing, and tell the jokes I’d normally tell, and be as nerdy as I’d normally be, and get paid for that. I could even get paid to receive pleasure, paid to listen to a handsome man describing in detail how he would touch me if we were in the same room. I felt high on the attention, the flattery, and – yes – the money.

I’m very good at talking myself into the belief that no one actually wants/likes/loves me, even when there’s ample evidence to the contrary. I mean, for fuck’s sake, I’m married to the love of my life now, who courted me relentlessly even while we were living 500 miles apart (they incidentally also live in New York – actually I met them on the trip that was supposed to be my first meetup with my sugar daddy, planned and booked before he ended things with me), and even now, I still have times when I feel deeply undesirable and can’t understand why anyone would ever want me.

But I know that someone did want me, because he was paying me hundreds of dollars a month to make me giggle on the phone. And that means that I could be (and, in fact, am) wanted by other people – not only now, but in the future. And it’s hard for me to explain that away, even on my most insecure days.

 

This post contains a sponsored link. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Velvet Thruster Sammie

Having been in this business for as long as I have, I can usually tell from a mile away if I’m going to love a toy. I’m not always 100% correct in my assessment – because it’s my junk, not my brain, that ultimately determines whether a toy works for me – but my hunches usually lean in the right direction.

So when the folks at Velvet Brands – who make the Velvet Thruster line of toys – asked if they could send me something, I was excited. I’d wanted to try one of these fuckers for years, because I had a strong suspicion that I’d love them. AND I DO, as it turns out!

 

The good

Velvet sent me their Sammie thruster, which is the biggest one they make. It’s got 7″ of insertable length and a hefty 2.25″ diameter. But my vagina’s not a superhero every day, so it’s great that they also sent me the Jackie attachment, which can be swapped for the Sammie attachment when I want to be fucked by something slimmer. This approach, of having a base unit that you can use with multiple different heads, is brilliant; it’s one of the many nice features that elevate Velvet Thrusters from regular self-thrusting toys and make them into something more akin to a fucking machine.

See, fucking machines are the go-to recommendation if you want something strong that can rhythmically pound into you without requiring much effort on your part. (As a frequently lazy masturbator, I understand this desire.) But a good fucking machine can run you upwards of $500, and also tends to take up a massive amount of space. So I love that the Velvet Thruster is relatively compact, and reasonably priced for the amount of power you get ($255 in the USA, $352 up here in Canada).

Because this thing is indeed fucking powerful. When I’ve tested other thrusters before, some (like the Fun Factory Stronic toys) have created a motion so small that it’s more akin to jiggling back and forth than slamming in and out of you. That can still feel plenty good at times, but when you really want to get fucked, it may not be what you reach for. Other thrusters I’ve tried have had such weak motors that they peter out when pressure is applied, and seeing as the vagina muscles (and anal muscles) contract and pulse during arousal and orgasm, it can be hard to get consistent stimulation with that type of toy, which can result in lessened pleasure and a weakened climax.

NOT SO with the Velvet Thruster! This thing’s motor has so much oomph that it doesn’t give a shit what my vagina is doing, it just keeps on truckin’ (and fuckin’). Its six speeds range from a slow-and-steady pace to a much more frantic 140 strokes per minute. The sensations are much stronger and more consistent than those I’ve gotten from any other self-thrusting toy, and it makes me come super hard.  I’ve never used a full-on fucking machine, because I’ve never had the space to spare and don’t often masturbate in the positions necessitated by such a behemoth; this Velvet toy delivers all the chutzpah I’d want from a fucking machine, but suits my needs much better.

I wasn’t sure how I’d feel about the shapes and textures of the attachments I was sent, because they’re both utterly lacking in curve, and have a semi-realistic veiny texture along the shaft. With ample lube (which is required with this toy – more on that below) and enough warm-up/arousal, the texture was a non-issue; if anything, it left me feeling even more thoroughly fucked after a session, in a good way. And as for the shape, well, these heads are long enough to hit my A-spot on each thrust – with a little manual help from me by finding the right angle during initial insertion – and so I’m more than happy with them. The 2.25″ girth of the Sammie can feel too big for me some days, especially with how firm it is, but then I can always swap to the Jackie for a subtler experience.

Velvet sent me an optional suction cup base for this toy (pictured), and I think it’d be a smart thing to throw into your cart if you get one of these. It opens up your positioning options substantially, making it much easier for you to back up against a wall to get fucked, or sit on the dick from above as it thrusts up at you from the floor. These aren’t common positions in my masturbation repertoire at all, but it’s fantastic to have the option, especially since this is the exact type of toy I’d reach for if I wanted to feel like a real human was well-and-truly railing me.

The toy’s “balls” act as a flared base which makes it anal-safe; Velvet sells an anal-specific attachment, but the others work just fine in your butt too. I also like that the toy’s power button is on its balls, which face away from you during use; this makes it almost impossible to accidentally turn the toy off mid-session.

Oh yeah, and it can last 6-8 hours on a charge. Impressive.

 

The bad

My complaints about this toy are mostly the usual ones you’ll hear about almost any thruster. Namely: it makes a loud, mechanical whirring noise during use, and it’s bigger than your typical sex toy so it might not fit in small nightstand drawers. That being said, I find both of those qualities to be forgivable, given this thing’s dazzling power output.

You will need a lot of lube with this toy. You just will. Not only does it help with surface friction – which would be a major issue otherwise, due to the toy’s draggy matte silicone and veiny texture – but it makes the thrusting go more smoothly and makes it less likely that the toy will shimmy its way out of you.

The main logistical issue I face with this thruster – and many other thrusters – is indeed that it tends to work its way out of my vag as it thrusts. You need to anchor the handle against something to prevent this from happening; a firm pillow between your legs could work, and of course, if you’ve suction-cupped the thruster to a wall or floor, those surfaces will provide helpful resistance. But my most common solution to this problem, because I’m lazy, has been to bend one knee so my ankle is braced against the toy’s handle. The toy is long enough that I can do this comfortably, even though my fibro-ridden knees complain if I bend them too much for too long. Having to keep my ankle in one spot during use isn’t ideal, of course, but it’s not all that obtrusive and usually doesn’t bother me, especially since it results in me getting fucked so hard I see stars.

The thruster’s buttons sometimes seem uncomfortably far away from me; I usually have to bend over a bit and look at them in order to change speeds. But this isn’t the type of toy I tend to change speeds on very often, compared to, say, a clitoral vibrator, so it hasn’t been too much of an issue.

I’ll also say that this thruster is very firm. The silicone gives it a tiny bit of squish at the surface, but overall it’s way way harder than any human dick would be. This can be wonderful if you’re craving strong sensations, but less so if you want something realistic-feeling or more forgiving. I always feel thoroughly fucked after using this toy, and I find that cunt-ache kinda hot and fun in most circumstances, but if you’re prone to pain/discomfort from penetration, you’ll probably want to stick with a smaller attachment and, again, use a shit ton of lube.

Notably, it’s not waterproof. This makes me slightly sad as someone who would love to get fucked during a leisurely bathtub wank, but it’s by no means a dealbreaker for me.

 

Final thoughts

I’m really delighted with the Velvet Thruster Sammie. It provides enough force and consistency to fuck me the way I like, and I often have stellar orgasms when I pair it with a clitoral vibe.

It may not be appropriate for all situations – I wouldn’t use it if I was concerned about someone overhearing me, for instance, or if my vag was sore – but it’s the best toy I’ve found for fulfilling the specific craving to get ploughed hard. And since my partner lives 500 miles away from me and I’m not dating/fucking anyone else at the moment, that is indeed a craving I encounter from time to time.

Do I wish the Velvet Thruster was a little squishier, a little quieter, and a little cheaper? Sure. But is it also the best thruster I’ve ever tried? Absolutely. And that, folks, is the thrust of my argument.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.