butt plug

Sharing the Sexy #12

Kate Sloan

• Here’s an article on sex with trans men. A trans guy friend of mine says, “When in doubt about a part of a trans person’s body, ask what it is and what you should call it.”

• Sexxit had a great thread this week that asked the question, if most women need clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, why are so many men surprised by this? A lot of very interesting responses ensued.

• The “female Viagra” will be a nasal spray, apparently.

• Tantus has some new butt plugs out and they look terrific.

• This woman has an orgasm every time she eats an olive. What the fuck?!

• A dude with a scat fetish (i.e. poop) did an Ask Me Anything on Reddit. Aaaand this is why I love/hate the internet.

• Steve Pavlina, whose eclectic and informative blog covers everything from entrepreneurship to spirituality to polyamory, wrote about how to invite cuddling without inviting sex.

• This week I watched Strange Sex’s feature on the man with the world’s biggest penis and I am kind of shocked that he’s just some nebbish white dude.

Sharing the Sexy #2

Kate Sloan

Here’s what I’m reading/watching/consuming about sex this week. Yeah, baby!

• Shay, of Conscious Cunt, interviewed me about body hair. We chatted about our pubes, pits, and legs, and how it all makes us feel about our bodies. Good readin’ for feministas and hairy princesses!

• Luscious Playthings is a new Etsy shop specializing in handmade glass toys. How stunning is this butt plug?!

• I love, love, love this video of Steve Hughes doing stand-up about the perceptions of gay men and straight men. His argument is a good one to bring up with any homophobes in your life, though they probably wouldn’t find it as funny as I do.

• Dodson and Ross answer the question, “How do I know if I’ve had an orgasm?” I usually say, “If you’ve had one, you’ll know,” but they have a different perspective.

• I know you’ve heard this all before, but this dude on Sexxit is insecure about his dick and a bunch of folks chimed in to cheer him up. My favorite comment (the top-voted one) is a great reality check for men everywhere: “Your dick is for your orgasm, not hers.” Amen to that! I certainly don’t know any men who can come from having a clit rubbed on them, the way women are expected to come from having penises penetrate them – do you?

• This post about “trans fat” people makes me realize how weird the world is getting. Trans fat folks are thin but identify as fat. Yeah, whatever…

• An oldie but a goodie: Starling writes about how to avoid coming off as “creepy” if you’re a dude. I strongly recommend that all men read this, especially straight men, to gain some insight and get some perspective.

• Rachel Kramer Bussel, one of my favorite erotica writers, lists her reasons for loving the Hitachi Magic Wand. As a side note, I recently bought a Hitachi and my feelings on it keep flip-flopping from loathing to love…

• Vagenda profiled 10 ridiculous products that are marketed at women. Surprise, surprise: a lot of them have to do with genital shame. When will this culture finally get tired of claiming that vaginas are gross?

• Mission: Great Sex is raising money to help find the most pleasurable, well-fitting condoms, in an effort to improve the population’s enjoyment of safe sex. Awesome!

Review: Fun Factory Boosty

Kate Sloan

When I showed my boyfriend a photo of Fun Factory’s latest butt plug, the Boosty, he audibly shuddered. “That looks so uncomfortable!” he said. Meanwhile, I was plotting ways to get my hands on one ASAP.

Now that I’ve got one, I’m not disappointed. It might be the cutest-looking toy in my collection. It looks like ice cream, or an abstract snowman for your butt, or something. It’s a lovely shade of teal, and you can also get it in black, but why would you?

The Boosty is made of 100% silicone. It’s pretty squishy and forgiving. This, coupled with its barely-tapered tip, sometimes makes it tricky to insert. I’ve found it helpful to lube up the inside of my ass as well as the plug itself (water-based only, please!), to warm up with a smaller tapered plug first, and to go slow. Of course, that’s good advice for any plug, but the Boosty’s shape makes it more challenging to insert so it’s wise to know what you’re doing. For this reason, I wouldn’t recommend this toy to anal beginners.

It’s a great size for an intermediate plug. It measures 1 ½" in diameter at its widest point, which normally is my upper limit for anal toys, but this doesn’t feel like a stretch because the plug’s size increases gradually. If I can get the smallest bulb (about 1 ¼") to slip inside, I know that the rest will follow, because it’s a well-designed and anatomically conscious toy.

As with any slanted or curved plug, some people will prefer to wear it facing forward and some will like it better backward. The rectum naturally curves toward the back of the body, so that feels more natural and comfortable for long-term wear, but I find I don’t get any G-spot stimulation unless the plug is facing forward.

This is a plug I can happily wear for hours at a time, if I take care to re-lube every half hour. Its shape and size feel perfectly filling in my ass, and its slender but sturdy base nestles neatly between my cheeks. I don’t experience any pain or discomfort while sitting with the Boosty in, unless I shift positions abruptly and quickly. And I never, ever feel like it’s slipping out, probably because the body of the plug is so much bigger than the neck.

It’s not a flawless toy, though. There’s a seam that runs all the way around it, marring its beauty and smooth texture. I’m not particularly seam-sensitive and can’t feel this one during use, but it bugs me that a toy company would subject customers’ sensitive tissues to sharp seams. Surely there’s a better way?

The other problem with the Boosty is that it retains ass smell more than any other toy I own. I don’t know why this is, since most of my anal toys are made of pure silicone which should theoretically have all the same properties. A good scrub with hot water and soap after use doesn’t get the smell out; boiling it helps a bit, but not much. This isn’t a big deal, since I don’t spend a lot of time sniffing my sex toys, but it’s still an issue I wish this toy didn’t have.

For people who already know that they like butt plugs and can handle one of this size, the Boosty is a fantastic option. It’s whimsical, satisfying, and comfortable. This is right up there with my butt’s other love, the Pure Plug. I’m looking forward to trying out more Fun Factory anal toys in the future!

Review: Njoy Pure Plug (Medium)

Kate Sloan

When it comes to butt plugs, I have a bit of a Goldilocks complex. The Pleasure Plug 1 and Ripple felt too small and slid out too easily. The Ryder and Dipper felt too big and required me to be warmed up before I could insert them. I’ve been searching for a plug that’s somewhere in the middle – large enough to stay in and be noticeable, but small enough to go in without a fuss. And I’ve finally found it in the gleaming, stainless steel, medium Njoy Pure Plug.

I chose the medium size because it measures 1 ¼" in diameter, exactly halfway between my too-small 1" toys and my too-large 1 ½" ones. I think the medium is an okay size for a beginner, especially considering how smooth and dragless steel is. If your ass is really tight and virginal, go for the small, but ambitious beginners should buy the medium right off the bat because they’ll be less likely to outgrow it in a snap.

As with all Njoy products, my Pure Plug arrived in a black wooden box covered by an elegant white slipcover that displays the company name and a silhouetted illustration of the toy inside. The wooden box contains a styrofoam cut-out of the toy, covered in hot pink satin, so that the toy fits perfectly in its allocated spot. Njoy’s packaging looks classy as hell, but it’s actually one of the few things that disappoints me about the brand – the satin is cheap and the styrofoam falls apart if you’re even a little bit rough with it. Sad trombone!

The plug itself is gorgeous, however. It’s made of high-quality stainless steel that won’t tarnish, even if you neglect to clean it for days. The steel is smooth and perfect all the way around (well, mine has a tiny bump on the inside of the handle, but that’s a fluke). It’s heavy for its size, as you’d expect from steel, so it feels totally luxe in the hand and in the butt.

Like glass, steel doesn’t need as much lube as a draggy material like silicone does. I prefer to use only a couple drops of lube (any kind – silicone-based is great for anal play) with my Pure Plug, because if I use too much, it warms up and drips out of me, making me feel like I’ve soiled myself. Not a pleasant experience. In fact, in a pinch, I can actually just spit on this plug and that’ll be enough lubrication to get it to go in, though I don’t recommend this!

Another benefit of steel over silicone is that it doesn’t retain any ass smell, the way silicone has been known to do. A quick wash with soap and water gets this plug very clean and makes it smell as good as new.

Once inserted, it feels fantastic. Weighty enough to be detectable at all times, without feeling like it’s going to slip out. Bulbous enough for me to feel sufficiently filled up, without preventing me from using another toy vaginally if I want to. The steel warms up to my body temperature and eventually gets to a point where it feels like it’s warmer than my body. It’s a very sexy sensation and I often find myself getting turned on while just wearing this plug around the house.

The plug’s handle is flawlessly designed, at least for me. Widthwise, it’s practically flat, so it sits between my cheeks obediently and comfortably – but lengthwise, it’s definitely long enough to assure me that it won’t slip inside. And there’s a finger hole which allows for easy insertion and removal.

I tried this plug during sex and found that it didn’t really work for me, mainly because I’m so small down there that there just isn’t enough room for an intermediate plug and my boyfriend’s cock. The plug kept wanting to turn sideways to make more room for the intrusion. But if you’ve got more space in your trunk, this would probably be a great plug to add to your partnered sexytimes.

So if you want a comfortable, high-quality plug for long-term wear, I can’t recommend the Pure Plug highly enough. Check out the measurements, choose the right size for you, and you won’t be disappointed: this is a wonderful, satisfying plug that’s just as nice to stare at as it is to clench around.

Review: Tantus Dipper

Kate Sloan

Normally, when I request a toy to review, it’s because I have some inkling that I might enjoy it. I check out its measurements, examine its features, compare it to other toys I’ve tried, and if it seems like it might work for me, I request it. But when I asked PinkCherry.ca to send me a Tantus Dipper, it wasn’t because I thought I would like it – it was because it kind of scared me, and I thought it’d be a good challenge.

The Dipper is my first textured butt plug. All the other plugs that my ass has enveloped have been smooth, easily made slick with lube. The Dipper has the same diameter as the Ryder, the biggest plug I’ve taken up the butt, but because the Dipper is covered in deep ridges, it feels even more challenging.

Like all the Tantus toys I’ve tried, the Dipper is made of 100% silicone. It’s quite dense in the body and base of the plug, so those parts have hardly any give at all, but the neck is thinner so it’s flexible. This, as I learned from the too-rigid Joe Rock, is a good quality in a plug.

Looking at the Dipper as I pulled it out of its standard plastic packaging, I thought, This is going to hurt. On Twitter, I referred to it as the Ridged Butt Plug of Doom. I braced myself for trouble.

After warming up with a smaller toy and dumping a bunch of water-based lube on the Dipper, I slowly, slowly guided it into my ass. It felt foreign and uncomfortable at first, as my butt met texture for the first time. I reached the widest point of the plug – 1 ½" – and it stretched and hurt a tiny bit, but I kept on pushing until the Dipper slid home with a satisfying pop.

I spent the next few hours doing various household activities while wearing the Dipper. I can report that it stays in place better than any other plug I’ve tried. There is no moment at which I feel like this toy is going to come out; it doesn’t even feel like it’s moving at all. It’s anchored, and that’s awesome.

The Dipper’s neck and base are very comfortable. I thought the base might feel weird, since it’s spherical, unlike the narrow rectangular plug bases I’m used to – but it nestles nicely between my cheeks and doesn’t bother me at all.

Sitting with the Dipper in is sometimes a bit tricky, because the plug’s tip is pointed and can jab my innards if I sit down the wrong way. I’d recommend that you go slowly if you want to sit or move around a lot with this plug inside you.

I love that the Dipper is small enough that I can use another toy vaginally while it’s in. This doesn’t feel as fabulous as I thought it would – maybe I’m just not a fan of anal texture? – but it’s always cool to have the option.

Tantus normally gets everything right, but the Dipper has a very noticeable seam running down each side of it, from the tip of the plug to the bottom of its base. This seems glaringly incongruent with my other Tantus toys, which are sleek and seamless (as far as I’ve been able to tell, anyway). I don’t feel the seam in use, but it’s obnoxious that it’s there. Nothing that rubs against sensitive tissues should ever have sharp seams on it.

I’m not a big fan of the ridges, to be honest. I think I would like this plug a whole lot more if it had the same shape and dimensions but was smooth. For me, the ridges do nothing but create discomfort during insertion and removal. And they’re incredibly difficult to clean. On the plus side, they do allow the toy to hang onto lube fairly well.

So who would I recommend the Tantus Dipper for? Someone whose butt loves texture. Someone who wants a plug for long-term wear and has some anal experience under hir* belt. Someone who has a fondness for sex toys that resemble BDSM torture devices (or could even be used as such). If you fall into one or two or all three of these categories, there’s a very good chance you could fall in love with the Dipper. But if your butt’s a wimp, give this one a pass and consider picking up the much tamer Ripple instead.

Thanks, PinkCherry.ca!

*Yep, I used a gender-neutral pronoun.