dildo

Cheap Orgasms, Anyone?

Kate Sloan

I usually believe that a more expensive sex toy has got to be better than a cheap one. After all, my all-time favorite toy costs $140 plus a $40 attachment; runners-up cost anywhere from $79 to $139. These toys are pricey for a reason, and that reason is: they’re good.

However, some quality sex toys are, indeed, cheap. Here’s a few solid and inexpensive options…

1. California Exotics’ Turbo Glider is a popular, classic, traditional vibrator. It’s made of hard plastic, the only sex toy material I’m aware of which manages to be non-porous, body-safe, and cheap. It’s waterproof, has some very pleasing texture, and is also the strongest battery-operated vibe I’ve ever come across. At $16, you can hardly call it an investment, but if it was, it’d be a worthwhile one!

2. Don Wands’ Bent Graduate is a wonderful glass dildo that goes straight for the G-spot. It’s double-ended, easy to get clean, and comes in cute colors. What’s not to like?

3. Tantus makes a dildo called Acute which is tiny but hits my G-spot like a mofo. Seriously, I’ve switched over to this toy many times mid-wank because the dildo I was previously using just wasn’t cutting it in terms of G-spot stimulation. It would also be fabulous for pegging, though I don’t currently have a willing partner for that one! At only $32, it’s an absolute steal for a toy I use as often as I do.

4. Another California Exotics toy! (See, they’re not all bad.) The Eclipse vaginal balls are one of the best kegel toys I’ve found – lots of delicious bouncing, sturdy retrieval cord, cute design – and they also happen to be made of body-safe materials. Plus they cost $23. I recommend these all the time to people who are looking for balls to put in their vag, because I’ve tried several and these remain my favorites.

5. The RodeoH briefs harness is arguably not that cheap on the whole, but as far as harnesses go, you’re not going to find a better one for any cheaper. It retails for $45, looks foxy on just about anyone, holds dildos in place for sexytimes, and doesn’t have a million straps you have to snap and adjust and fiddle with. This is the only harness I own and I don’t have any desire for another, because this one does its job so damn well.

What are your favorite toys for under $50?

Review: Laura Berman Kona

Kate Sloan

There’s so much to like about the Laura Berman Kona. But it’s all ruined by the lack of a proper handle.

I wanted the Kona because it has the thing that makes my G-spot swoon: a big, round bulb, followed by a skinny shaft. And indeed, that part of the toy is perfect. It’s a “hits the spot immediately” kind of toy.

The trouble, though, is that when a toy hits my G-spot that well, it makes me want to thrust it in and out really fast for extended periods of time. And that is completely impossible with the Kona, unless you have the world’s shallowest G-spot.

I don’t think mine is excessively deep, but I just can’t make the Kona thrust the way I want it to, because it’s too damn short and it has no handle. The entire length of the toy is 5", which seems to be exactly the depth of my vagina. It doesn’t take very long at all for my genitals to swallow up the Kona, almost completely. And there’s no way I can do any serious thrusting if the amount of “handle” I’ve got to work with is an inch or smaller.

The Kona is also marketed as a kegel exerciser. In fact, this is the primary usage that’s listed in its description, which – in addition to Laura Berman’s insistence on calling it a “vaginal stimulator” instead of a dildo – just annoys me. But nonetheless, it’s a decent kegel tool. You insert the bulb, squeeze your muscles tight, and try to pull the toy out with your hand. It provides some solid resistance and a bit of G-spot stimulation – more than can be said for a lot of kegel toys out there.

The Kona is supposedly pure silicone but it smells rubbery/plasticky. I’m too much of a nervous nellie to do a “flame test” to check the accuracy of its silicone claims, but I have my doubts.

If you’re shopping for an inexpensive silicone G-spot dildo, you could do worse than the Laura Berman Kona. It hits the spot wonderfully and doubles as a cool kegel device. But please only buy this toy if you know for certain that you don’t like fast thrusting, or you have an exceptionally shallow G-spot; otherwise you’ll just end up with a pussy full of useless silicone.

Sharing the Sexy #7

Kate Sloan

• Here’s the 7 dumbest myths about gay sex.

• Modern Family actor Jesse Tyler Ferguson is launching a company that sells stylish bowties to benefit pro-gay rights organizations. I don’t know about you, but I love being able to buy cute things and support my favorite causes at the same time!

• This dildo is apparently spiritually charged. Would you buy one?

• This theory of attraction purports to explain why we get into certain kinds of relationships with certain kinds of people.

• This headline is so ridiculous, it requires no commentary: Man Tries to Rape Raccoon, Gets His Penis Bitten Off.

• Got a vaginal infection you want to cure naturally? (I am so amused by the suggestion to put garlic in your vagina. I’ll definitely try this next time I get an infection…!)

• This guy’s penis inhaled a condom…?! “Basically you know when the tip goes inside out and inside your penis? That’s it.” Uh, no, I don’t know if I’ve seen that one before.

• I made a list of examples of how our society actively encourages women to suppress our sexuality. Can you think of any more?

• The Pervocracy writes about that age-old battle: vibrator vs. penis. My thoughts, as someone who owns a zillion vibrators and has a wonderful boyfriend with a wonderful cock? Both are satisfying. Both are immensely pleasurable. And both have their time and place in my life, absolutely.

• Feeling generous? A Steampunk’s Guide to Sex is taking Kickstarter donations.

• In sex-positive circles, we spend a lot of time discussing all the kinky and out-there things we’d like to try… but what don’t you want to do in bed? My list: scat (but I’d give watersports a shot), armpit-licking, group sex with four or more people, ass-to-mouth, and getting fucked with anything over 8 inches long (sorry, huge dudes!).

• This man cut off, cooked, and served his own penis. I’m speechless.

• In honor of Bi Visibility Day, Carrie wrote about being an out-and-proud bisexual. Hell yeah!

• Rush Limbaugh is seriously blaming small penises on feminists. What the fuck is wrong with this guy?

Review: Fun Factory Rainbow Amor

Kate Sloan

During a recent trip to New York, I went to Babeland in the hopes of buying a Hitachi Magic Wand. Tragically, they were sold out (don’t worry, I ended up getting one eventually), so I bought the next toy to catch my eye: the Babeland-exclusive rainbow version of the Fun Factory Amor. I’m glad I did; it’s no Hitachi, but it’s a sweet little dildo.

The Amor is a harness-compatible toy that’s fairly short and squat, with 5" of insertable length and a diameter of just under 1 ½". It’s supposed to be a good tool for G-spotting, though I was initially skeptical of its abilities because its curve is subtle and its head is barely pronounced. It’s made of 100% silicone that’s fairly firm but has some give.

So how does the Amor measure up to the similar Tantus Acute, one of my favorite G-spotters? Amor has less curve and a less defined head, but it’s also thicker and slightly firmer. To my surprise, it hits my G-spot with ease – and because it’s got a decent girth to it, I don’t have to angle it weirdly like I do with the Acute. The sensation isn’t quite as intense as it is with my Acute, which I think is owed to the Amor’s barely-prominent head, but I don’t always want an extreme, knee-weakening amount of G-spot stimulation. Sometimes just having it rubbed is enough and a full-blown attack isn’t necessary.

The Amor’s shaft is totally smooth and almost straight once you get past the head, so my vag sometimes wishes for a bit more stimulation in the first couple inches. This is a dildo for when I want to give my G-spot some lovin’ but don’t really care about my vaginal walls. Same deal with my A-spot – the Amor’s too short to reach it, so I’ll have to be in a pretty specific mood to crave this one.

While the Amor isn’t the kind of dildo that leaves my legs trembling and my pussy utterly satiated, it’s cute-looking and it does a good enough job. And it’ll make a killer addition to my Pride outfit next year.

Review: Icicles No. 24

Kate Sloan

Pipedream’s Icicles collection is notorious for ripping off other people’s designs. However, I’ve never seen anything like the Icicles No. 24 anywhere else. It’s a pink tentacle. A gnarled tongue. A glass octopus cock. My curiosity was piqued the moment I saw it.

Conscious Contraceptives was nice enough to send me one, and when I took it out of the box, I just fondled it for a while. It’s kind of scary; the bottom side bears two long rows of pointy-ish bumps, and the top side has some tree branch-like lines carved into it. It’s one of those toys that could either be amazingly pleasurable or unprecedentedly painful. My vag was nervous.

But actually, this is a pretty awesome dildo. Sure, you need to use a boatload of lube on it, or your delicate internal tissues could snag uncomfortably on the ultra-mega texture all over this toy. But once lubrication is taken care of, the Icicles No. 24 provides some very unique and very intense sensations.

I prefer to use the dildo with the handle facing up toward my clit. This puts the bumps on the bottom side of my vag, where I can’t feel them as intensely – and this is a good thing, because even when I face them upward, they hit the perimeter of my G-spot without actually rubbing the spot itself. The feeling of those bumps took some getting used to, especially since that part of my vagina rarely gets much attention at all, but a few well-lubed practice sessions taught me to enjoy all that texture.

The top side of the toy is less texture-heavy, boasting an interconnected web of ridges that can definitely be felt but are never uncomfortable the way the bumps can be. The shape of the toy puts those ridges riiiight on my G-spot, while the tip curves downward into my posterior fornix. There’s not as much sexual sensitivity there as there is in my anterior fornix, but it still feels nice.

The curved handle is easy to hold onto, though I usually just grip it in my fist instead of bothering with the fingerhole. If the handle is intended to stimulate my clit, it’s a fail; I have to push the toy in uncomfortably far for that to happen. Besides which, it’s bumpy glass, which isn’t my clit’s favorite thing in the first place.

Overall, I’m fairly shocked by how much I like the Icicles No. 24. It’s not going to be my new go-to dildo or anything, but it surpassed my expectations. It might surpass yours too, if you like glass, texture, and tentacles, and you’ve got lube to spare.

Thanks so much to Conscious Contraceptives for sending me this toy! Check out their mission statement – a portion of their profit from every purchase is donated toward helping underprivileged communities get the contraceptives they need. Shop for sex toys and help the world!