G-spot

Review: Le Stelle Perks EX-C

Kate Sloan

I’m always on board with new luxury sex toy companies popping up to fill the shoes of Lelo and Jimmyjane, now that those brands have well and truly jumped the shark. So I was excited when Le Stelle reached out to offer me a vibrator to try.

I chose the Perks Series Ex-C – and no, I’m not sure why it’s called that. It’s a rechargeable vibrator in a lovely shade of cornflower blue, and it comes with two interchangeable attachments: one for external/clitoral use, and one for dual stimulation (G-spot + clit at the same time).

Switching the attachments out is easy – you twist one counterclockwise to remove it, and twist the new one clockwise to lock it in place. They’re both made of smooth, matte silicone that feels luxurious to the touch. The attachments feel fancier than the plastic vibrating base, which is lightweight and doesn’t feel as substantial, but they look pretty together.

The clitoral attachment, I will admit, did next-to-nothing for me. The vibrations are buzzier than my clit prefers, making my genitals start to get numb and my hand start to get itchy within a minute or so. They also start too high for me – I like a lot of gradation in my vibrator speeds – and there are only 3 steady speeds before you start cycling through the 7 patterns. Scrolling through modes with only one button is annoying as hell, but Le Stelle is hardly the first company to use this system – my beloved We-Vibe does it too – so I can hardly fault them for that. The clit attachment is also bendy/squishy/flexible, so if you like any pressure whatsoever on your clit, you’ll have a hard time using this. And as icing on the cake, the vibrations this toy produces are loud – think mini-buzzsaw – even though its marketing copy says it’s “discreet and quiet.” Nope.

With all that in mind, I was ready to write this vibe off, but then I tried the dual-stimulation attachment. It’s got a big swollen G-spot head, a slim tapered shaft, and a little ridged nub that’s supposed to sit on your clit. I found, to my surprise, that this attachment works really well for my body: it lines up just right with both my G-spot and clit at the same time, which is a feat in itself, and it strikes a good balance between firmness and squishiness and between broadness and slimness for my particular G-spot. The buzzy vibrations feel less annoying when they’re inside; my G-spot evidently likes buzziness more than my clit does, because I was actually able to squirt with this toy by thrusting it while the vibrations were on. Neat!

The clitoral nubbin stays in place pretty well when I leave the vibe still, but, as I mentioned, these vibrations aren’t my clit’s favorite. It tends to go numb after a little while, and I can’t imagine getting off with this vibe alone. Luckily, though, the attachment is flexible enough that I can bend it backwards a little, to keep the internal portion in contact with my G-spot while freeing up some space in front of my clit for my hand or another vibe. Using the Perks Ex-C this way, orgasm is possible – and often quite intense, with all that G-spot pressure and vibration going on.

While this attachment looks like it might be anal-safe, I wouldn’t recommend using it that way – I’d be too scared the attachment would pop off and get lost inside you. A reader on Instagram also reported to me that they owned the anal-friendly version of this toy and it broke while they were switching the attachment, exposing the wires underneath. If that’s anything to go on (which it might not be – I haven’t confirmed this case and I don’t know if it’s a one-off or not), these vibes might not be the most durable, and they’re only splash-proof, not waterproof, so I wouldn’t trust these for particularly strenuous or wet sessions.

That said, for $69.90 (nice), I think the Le Stelle Perks Ex-C is a pretty decent G-spot vibrator, if nothing else. I have a hard time finding toys that don’t make my G-spot want to curl up and die, and this pleased it better than anything new I’ve tried in quite a while. Plus it’s pretty, and I’m a sucker for a good blue.

 

Thanks so much to Le Stelle for providing this toy for me to review! This post was sponsored, and as always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Lelo Mona Wave

Kate Sloan

There are a number of missteps that get sex bloggers up in arms. Conflating vulvas with vaginas. Sexist or racist toy marketing. Medical misinformation. We hate all of those things, but if you really wanna set off sex blogger tantrums galore, try telling us sex toys are a substitute for a human partner. Oh, we will flip our wigs.

So, what I’m about to say is somewhat sacrilegious, but: the Lelo Mona Wave is a sex toy which makes it glaringly, dishearteningly obvious that I am fucking a sex toy and not a person.

Normally this wouldn’t bother me. I’m under no illusions about sex toys needing to feel like real dicks, or mouths, or what have you. I know that human partners edge out toys in terms of spontaneity, excitement and responsiveness, but toys usually win when it comes to intense G-spot stimulation, hyper-efficient orgasms, or multi-tasking. But there’s something about the Mona Wave that routinely makes me sad it’s not a person. Like, deeply, disproportionately sad.

The Mona Wave is basically Lelo’s answer to Fun Factory’s Stronic line: automated thrusting for lazy masturbators comme moi. But while the Stronic thrums back and forth like a thrusting cock, the Mona Wave curls up and down like the come-hither-ing fingers of a G-spot-savvy lover. If that lover was extremely stoned or had just taken an elephant tranquilizer.

See, the Mona Wave’s motion is slooooow. There are two movement speeds, and they might as well be called “leisurely” and “tortoise-esque.” And that slowness is what makes me wish the toy was a human. It tries to directly imitate something humans do – that intense finger-curling that pleases so many G-spots the world over – but it does a bad job at replicating this act. If the Mona Wave were a human, I could sit up, give it a slightly exasperated look, and chirp, “Faster, please!” But it’s not a human, so I can’t do that. And it makes me feel… weirdly lonely.

Getting finger-fucked is one of my favorite acts. I fantasize about it frequently, and it’s often the way I get off with partners, their thick fingers stroking my insides as I hold a vibe to my clit. But what makes it exciting for me is the dynamism. It’s electrically hot to feel someone’s fingers quicken inside you when they sense that you need that, or ramp up the power of their thrusts as they feel you getting close. A well-attuned partner might slow down as you descend from the peak of your orgasm, or keep pounding at top speed if you prefer that. The Mona Wave doesn’t do any of these things, or even approximate them convincingly. And I know a toy isn’t a person, but it feels like Lelo has sent me a toy to do a person’s job.

Aside from the lacklustre motion settings, there’s not a whole lot to say about the Mona Wave. It vibrates, too, but as other reviewers have noted, the vibrations are disappointingly weaker than those on the standard Mona 2. I can rarely get off with the Mona 2 anyway – its vibrations are rumbly-ish but still just a liiiittle too buzzy for my demanding clit – so the Wave’s non-motion modes aren’t terribly exciting to me.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had several wonderful orgasms with the Mona Wave. But the G-spot stimulation is so tantalizingly slow that it feels like a partner is trying to keep me on the edge without letting me go over. If you’re into that sort of carefully meted sensation denial, you might enjoy the Mona Wave‘s lackadaisical stroking. But if your G-spot needs speed or pressure (and most need both), I’d recommend a Stronic thruster instead, or any decent G-spot dildo you can thrust by hand. You deserve better than a toy that almost gives you what you want.

Thanks for sending me this toy, Lelo!

Review: Fucking Sculptures Double Trouble

Kate Sloan

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Did someone break into the penthouse of my vagina and steal the blueprints? Because the Fucking Sculptures Double Trouble feels like it was designed just for me.

My vagina hungers for it. It can’t make up its mind which side is better. “Tonight I want the smaller side,” I’ll think, and insert that slightly slimmer end until it slides all up into my A-spot. That fuck-yeah feeling of deep pressure and rhythm seems like everything I could possibly want… until I remember that the toy’s other side exists.

I flip it around and push the big side into me, turning it sideways at first so it’ll fit. It finds my G-spot with alarming ease. It’s like a little fist, so round and firm, exerting pressure in places I didn’t even know I needed it. I rock it against my G-spot fast until I squirt, and still I want more. So I flip the toy back around. And again. And again.

This is how every session with my Double Trouble seems to go: a slow, jagged, delicious ascent toward orgasm, unable to decide what kind of stimulation the toy provides best. It’s the Renaissance man of my vagina. And it was appallingly expensive, but in the sticky heat of the moment, I don’t remember or care.

imageI first tried a Double Trouble at Bex‘s house. They were borrowing Caitlin‘s, which is the standard inky-black color that the DT usually comes in. While Bex and Penny chatted in the next room, I retreated to the air mattress Bex had set up for me in their office, pilfered some lube, and settled in with the Double Trouble. It felt luxurious and heavy and huge, and I didn’t think my vagina would like it as much as my eyes did, but I was wrong. I was also, admittedly, very drunk (I had been out cavorting with a friend earlier in the evening), which made me wonder if perhaps I was experiencing the toy with a rose-tinted vagina.

I immediately noticed that the A-spot stimulation I could get from the DT’s smaller end was excellent, and it made me come super hard in combination with my trusty Tango. But the larger end wouldn’t fit inside me at all, which I decided was a dealbreaker, especially given how expensive the toy is. It took a lot of willpower not to place a drunken order from the Fucking Sculptures website that very night, but those drawbacks were enough to keep me from hitting the “Add to Cart” button. (Well, let’s be real, I think I did hit “Add to Cart” but at least I didn’t hit “Check Out.”)

However, in subsequent months, I started to notice that all my favorite dildos du jour were massive and S-shaped. And I kept casting my mind back to that debauched night on Bex’s air mattress. On Twitter, I complained about not being able to afford the dildo of my dreams – and within 24 hours, I got booked for two cam shows with kindly horny men who wanted to fund my dildo habit in exchange for some saucy Skype time. The internet is magic, y’all.

imageMy lascivious benefactors only covered about half the cost of the toy, but that was enough to justify it for me – especially since Fucking Sculptures was having a sale at the time. I emailed Maria, co-owner of the company, to ask if she happened to have any Double Troubles left from the limited-edition, sky-blue “Dreamy Daze” batch that had been made back in May. As it turned out, she had exactly one left. And if you know me, you know that I love blue sex toys. So that sealed the deal. I ordered it on the spot.

Courtney Trouble has said that they designed the Double Trouble to be “a representation of a cunt from the inside out,” and that’s totally what it feels like to me. It fills the hungry void that my vagina sometimes becomes, and presses against the exact spots where I want pressure.

imageThe smaller end is the one I use the most – and I’m using the word “smaller” pretty loosely here, because it’s still big; it’s just more tapered and pointed, so it’s easy to insert even if I haven’t warmed myself up or used any lube. (My vagina is a professional, though, so your mileage may vary. Go forth and lubricate, my friends!) It has the mild curve and slightly narrowed tip that tends to work well for hitting my A-spot, and indeed, it does so fantastically. I just need to push down on the other end a little bit to get the angle right. I’ve even taught a few partners how to do this, and it seems to be a fairly easy toy to fuck someone with: despite how deep I like my Double Trouble inserted, I’ve yet to have a partner painfully bump my cervix with it, because the curve and taper are just right.

I like the bigger end too, but I have to be in the right mood for it. As I’ve mentioned here before, intense G-spot stimulation isn’t really my jam; sometimes I crave it but mostly I can take it or leave it. However, when that’s what I want, this end can totally deliver. It’s enormous and has no taper, so I have to turn it sideways to get it into me, but once it’s in, it’s comfortable (not like my so-intense-it’s-almost-painful Seaside Steamroller). The angle is not as drastic as something like the Seduction or Comet Wand, so the most adamant of G-spotting fans may not be pleased with it, but it works well for my body.

Fucking Sculptures makes their toys out of soda lime glass, which is heavier than the borosilicate often used for cheaper, mass-produced glass toys. As you might have noticed, the Double Trouble is gigantic, so it’s pretty heavy: about 1.75 lbs. I’m used to thrusting heavy toys (my beloved Eleven is 2.75 lbs) so this doesn’t bother me unless I’m using the toy for a long period of time and my muscles start to tire. But if you have any mobility or strength issues in your arms, wrists or hands, you will definitely hate the Double Trouble.

But me? I definitely love it. If my vagina and this dildo both had OkCupid accounts, their compatibility percentage would be 99%. And they would exchange flirty messages that quickly became explicit. And then they would go on a drinks-date, banter wittily for a few minutes, and retire to the Double Trouble‘s apartment for some raucous, sweaty sex.

 

You can buy the Double Trouble at SheVibe! And you should, ’cause it’s the fucking bomb!

Review: Fucking Sculptures G-Spoon

Kate Sloan

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Last month, I went to 7 West with some friends for lunch. After our meal, we decided to get some dessert, and I ordered the restaurant’s legendarily good dulce de leche cheesecake.

Admittedly, I was a bit drunk at this point, and had also been watching a lot of X Files, so I was in a slightly dramatic and science-fiction-y mood. So upon tucking into the cheesecake, I went on a rant something like this:

“This cheesecake is TOO GOOD. I feel like I am doing something illegal by eating it. Like it’s too delicious and wasn’t meant to be discovered by humans. Like it was found on an alien planet and brought back to earth and kept in quarantine by the FBI because it could actually be dangerous for human ingestion. But somehow I broke in and found it and now I’m eating it and I’m going to get in trouble on a national scale. And will possibly get an extraterrestrial illness for my gluttony, thereby starting a worldwide pandemic.”

Fortunately, my friends just find my drunken loquaciousness charming instead of weird…

I told you this story because I feel the same way about really good A-spot stimulation as I feel about that cheesecake. It feels inhumanly good, too good for this world – like I’ve hacked into the pleasure mainframe and am accessing something not meant for me. And that’s pretty fucking cool.

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The G-Spoon is a glass dildo made by artisanal sex toy company Fucking Sculptures, and despite the “G” in its name, for me it’s really more about the “A” – A-spot, that is. Or “anterior fornix,” if you wanna get fancy about it.

I first lusted after the G-Spoon when I read Aerie’s review of it. One thing Aerie and I have in common, which we discussed a bit at DildoHoliday, is our shared love of A-spot stimulation. In their review, Aerie describes the G-Spoon’s A-spotting abilities as “perfect,” “mind-blowing,” and “incredibly pleasurable.” They noted that the toy is long enough to hit the spot and has the right curve and angle to hit it without making cervical contact (which hurts and is best avoided). I was intrigued. If the G-Spoon worked for Aerie’s A-spot, I suspected it would work for mine.

And, holy fuck. Thank you, Aerie. Because this dildo is an A-spotting machine, the likes of which I’ve never encountered before.

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But before I get to that… let’s talk specs. All Fucking Sculptures toys are handmade and one-of-a-kind, so there are variations in terms of shape, size, surface appearance, etc. Mine is technically a “large” one, but it’s on the smaller end: large G-Spoons can range from 4.7″ to 5.9″ in circumference and 7.5″ to 9.8″ in length, and mine is 4.8″ around and 7.5″ long. Really large G-Spoons can apparently get pretty heavy (soda lime glass is dense!), so if that bothers you, you might want to stick with the medium size. Mine is basically on the cusp between medium and large.

The width of my G-Spoon is ideal for sliding past my cervix and gettin’ all up in my A-spot, but I do sometimes wish it was a bit longer. At maximum arousal, my vag is about 6″ to 6.5″ deep, meaning that I have to insert my G-Spoon almost all the way inside in order to reach my spot. This leaves only an inch or two of handle with which to manipulate the toy – and while I can certainly manage it, I can see that it would get annoying if my sessions went on for longer or if I got too much lube on the handle portion of the toy.

IMG_8561The deep grooves along the top side of the G-Spoon provide a little welcome friction during use, but they also collect vaginal fluids and cling onto ’em, necessitating a good toothbrush scrubdown with every wash. I like that these grooves end before the head of the toy, because that smoothness feels divine on my A-spot; I’m not sure I would respond as well to rough scraping in that area.

My G-Spoon is white with silvery-grey patches. I think it’s beautiful and eccentric-looking, but two different people (a friend and a hookup) both asked me, “Did you use this so much that the paint scraped off?!” While the premise of this question is hilarious, no, Fucking Sculptures toys are definitely not so shoddily-made that you can flake off the colors with heavy use! Like any good-quality glass toy, the pigment is inside the toy so it’ll stay put no matter how much you use it.

Also like any good-quality glass toy, my G-Spoon is pretty resistant to breakage. Soda lime glass is more temperature-sensitive than borosilicate glass, so you’re not supposed to boil or freeze Fucking Sculptures because they might crack if you do – but in regular, everyday use, the G-Spoon is fabulously sturdy. I even dropped it on my Eleven by accident and both toys were unharmed. (Don’t try this at home, kids…)

IMG_8560So, let’s get to the good stuff: sensation. Because this dildo feels like a freight train is hitting my A-spot, in a good-and-not-literal way. The thing about perfectly-executed A-spot stimulation is that it leaves me breathless and sated like nothing else – and I’m usually limited to experiencing this type of orgasm with partners, because so few of my toys can stroke my A-spot as consistently and directly as I like. Average-sized penises and long fingers can reach it with ease, but most toys? Not so much. The G-Spoon, however, is like an A-spot whisperer: it goes right for it, with minimal effort, and ravages that spot like it’s meant to be ravaged.

This results in the kinds of orgasms I usually only get from the efforts of skilled and patient partners. Sometimes I actually writhe around and make involuntary noises while using the G-Spoon, which normally doesn’t happen for me when I’m having solo sex. I think it’s an A-spot thing. It makes me lose control of my body a little bit. Hnnngggg.

I have also tried the G-Spoon on my actual G-spot, as it’s intended to be used. That just entails thrusting it a little more shallowly and maybe applying a little more pressure, since my G can handle roughness that my A cannot. This dildo is definitely up to the task if you need some focused, firm G-spot stimulation. I have other toys I like better for that purpose, but I don’t think anyone would be disappointed by the G-Spoon’s abilities in this department. It’s a multitalented little dude!

I know I’ve been writing a lot of positive reviews lately. I hope you aren’t starting to lose faith in me as a reviewer because of that. I promise I’m not sugar-coating any of this – I am just genuinely lucky enough to own some incredibly well-designed toys, especially in recent months. And the G-Spoon is easily one of my favorites I’ve received in ages. It’s jaw-droppingly gorgeous and cunt-meltingly effective. It makes me feel like a pampered queen, because it’s so luxurious and brings such effortless pleasure. Sometimes my mind wanders to my G-Spoon and I just think, “Why isn’t that inside me right now?!”

If you want to explore your A-spot and/or your G-spot, and you’ve got the budget to splurge on something stunning, you probably need a G-Spoon. Any sense of “Holy fuck!” you feel when looking at the price tag will be replaced by the “Holy fuck!” you’ll experience when you put this toy in your vagina.

Thank you so much to the terrific people at Fucking Sculptures for sending me this toy! You can buy their products at their website, at SheVibe, or at various smaller shops.

Review: NobEssence Seduction

Kate Sloan

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I have heard other reviewers describe G-spot stimulation as “addictive,” but I’m not sure I ever really understood that until the NobEssence Seduction.

Multiple orgasms are not usually my thing, but after the first time I came using the Seduction, it was less than an hour before I glanced over at it and thought, “Yeah, I need to use that again.” I did, and it was good enough to warrant the #GspotBLISS and #HOLYFUCK hashtags. That’s high praise!

I bought my Seduction in Portland when I was there for DildoHoliday. Epiphora took us to a local sex shop, and while the rest of the group wandered around looking at the store’s various wares, I found myself glued to the NobEssence display. In particular, I couldn’t stop staring at the Seduction. I’d only ever heard good things about it, and had wanted one for so long but had never even been in the same room as one. And now, here was a gorgeous black palm Seduction, right in front of me. So I bought it, even though it set me back a hefty $160.

When a sex toy is that expensive, it had damn well better be good. And let me tell you: the Seduction is incredible. Money well spent, as far as I’m concerned.

You know that “Oh shit, yeah” feeling that suddenly kicks into gear as you get close to an orgasm? That’s how my G-spot feels for most of the time that I’m thrusting the Seduction inside me. Its broad head is bigger than the G-spot toys I generally use, so it rubs over my entire G-spot with every thrust. There is no fucking around with this toy. Your G-spot cannot escape; the Seduction will find it.

Let’s be clear: everything I’ve said about this dildo so far has been about its larger end. The ball-shaped smaller end is good too, but it’s taught me something about my G-spot: it prefers broad stimulation, not pinpoint. Finely targeted pressure gives me more of that need-to-pee discomfort that sometimes puts me off G-spot play, while broader contact just feels good. As always, all bodies are different, but that’s how my G-spot rolls.

However, that’s not to say that I never use the small side of the Seduction. It makes for a terrific warm-up, helping my vag relax so it’ll be able to handle the significant girth (1 7/8″!) of the toy’s big end. And when that little ball is inside me, I can grind the Seduction’s shaft against my clit with minimal awkward angling. The motion is similar to jerking off a penis, and I like to do it while I idly read erotica or watch porn, as a prelude to serious self-fucking.

The orgasms I have from the Seduction (paired with a good clit vibe) are all-consuming and life-affirming. Panda says that hers makes her come so hard she cries, and I believe it. The combination of thickness, firmness, and a sharp G-spot angle makes for some very intense sensations. This dildo is not for you if you like your toys thin, gentle, or flexible.

But if your G-spot wants to have the wind knocked out of it… if you want to fuck your own brains out until you’re lying in a sweaty heap, possibly soaked in your own ejaculate… if you want orgasms that will make you weep and send fawning love letters to NobEssence… you need a Seduction.

Yes, it’s expensive. But pleasure this ridiculous is worth paying for.