oral sex simulator

Review: Lora DiCarlo Baci

Kate Sloan

My relationship to receiving cunnilingus has undergone a lot of changes over the years. There was a time, in my late teens and early twenties, when getting head was literally the majority of my sex life, because my partners then were people who preferred licking pussy over pretty much every other activity – and had therefore gotten quite good at it.

Later, as I started hooking up with randoms from Tinder and OkCupid, I gradually stopped asking for oral because it… stopped being good. But now that I’m back to being partnered with a self-professed pussy-eating fanatic, it’s back to being one of my favorite sexual activities, and something that I often fantasize about when I’m alone.

Accordingly, I’m as intrigued as I’ve ever been by the plethora of sex toys that claim to imitate cunnilingus. One in particular has gotten a lot of great reviews: the Lora DiCarlo Baci. (Apparently pronounced like “botchy.”) Let’s talk about it.

 

What is the Lora DiCarlo Baci?

Lora DiCarlo – both the company itself and the woman of the same name who founded it – is somewhat controversial and mysterious. While their products are beautifully designed and get good reviews, they’ve made a lot of sweeping claims that were called into question by an infamous Wired.com article, like that their founder is a med school dropout and that they use “micro-robotics” in their toys. However, in the sex toy industry, it’s hard to fault a company for talking itself up a little; they all do it. At least this one seems to be making genuinely original toys rather than basing their entire business model on plagiarism like some other sex toy companies do.

While Lora DiCarlo makes toys aimed at various different erogenous zones, the Baci is one that focuses specifically on clitoral pleasure. It does this in an interesting and unique way: although it uses similar “pressure-wave” technology to what’s found in Satisfyers and Womanizers, it also has what the company calls a “thrum pad” which is meant to sit between the inner labia during use, vibrating against the underside of the clitoral shaft and other, more deeply-buried portions of the internal clit. The company calls this “full-coverage clitoral stimulation,” a phrase certain to get my attention.

What I like about this toy:

  • Let’s not bury the lede: this thing feels good. Really good. A lot of pressure-wave toys are so focused on the glans of my clit that they feel almost inconsequential, like someone teasingly licking the tip of your dick when you really want a deepthroat blowjob. The Baci stimulates my glans with its “mouth,” rubs against my clitoral hood and inner labia with its “lips,” and rumbles against broad swathes of my internal clit with its sizeable “thrum pad.” The result is full-clit stimulation that normally I can only get from a huge, rumbly wand vibrator or my partner using their entire mouth on me. (I should say, water-based lube is a must with the Baci, particularly if you want it to feel like oral at all.)
  • As you’d expect from that description, the orgasms from this toy are more satisfying than those from many other toys in this category. This just makes sense: in general, the more of your sex organ that’s being stimulated before and during your orgasm, the more intense and long-lasting that orgasm is likely to feel. I reach climax easily, consistently and hard with this toy.
  • The Baci has 10 intensity settings (and no patterns, which I don’t care about anyway). I’ve never gone past 4 out of 10. I’ve never needed to. This toy is that good. If you’ve been curious about pressure-wave toys but are worried they’d be too subtle for you (which is a reasonable fear if, for example, you tend to masturbate with a powerful wand vibrator), I think the Baci could actually work for you. It’s not just that its motor is stronger than many of its competitors’; it’s that it uses its strength in a different way, stimulating more of the clitoral structure.
  • The controls are easy to understand: there’s a power button on the top that you press and hold to turn the toy on or off, and then there are “+” and “–” buttons on the back for changing the speed. All of these buttons are located and constructed such that I never bump them by accident.
  • It’s waterproof. Love.
  • The construction feels pretty sturdy, like it could get knocked around inside my suitcase or purse and be fine.
  • It comes with a travel cover, so you can keep it free from lint, dirt, etc. when it’s riding around in your bag or even when it’s just been tossed into your nightstand drawer.

What I don’t like about this toy:

  • The form factor of this toy is awkward, to say the least. It’s what my friend Epiphora would call a “vulva hog,” meaning it takes up so much space on my vulva during use that I can’t easily add a dildo, fingers, or a partner’s penis into the mix if I want some internal stimulation. If you’re looking to use a pressure-wave toy during penetrative sex, I’d recommend the We-Vibe Melt or Womanizer Premium instead. A stationary vag toy like the Hole Punch Fluke can work with the Baci, though. And frankly, when my clit’s being stimulated as fully and as well as the Baci can do it, I don’t always need extra stimulation to get me off. (P.S. There is something very funny to me about referring to penetration as “extra stimulation,” given how often that phrase is used about clit contact, which is, for me and most other people with vulvas, mandatory for reaching orgasm…)
  • As often happens with pressure-wave toys, sometimes the Baci makes me come faster than I wanted to, in that way that’s like “Oh shit, am I about to…? Oh no, yes, I am.” Seems weird to complain about this, I know, but sometimes I want to stretch out a session a little longer!
  • It’s a little loud. But like, so am I when I’m using it.
  • I don’t love the aesthetic of it. It’s almost my exact skin tone and kind of reminds me of a medical device, like something a doctor might use to take my cunt’s temperature. (Then again, a clinical aesthetic can be well-suited for medical play scenes, so your mileage may vary…)
  • The battery life isn’t amazing; I have to charge the Baci every 4-5 sessions or so, which is more often than I’d typically expect for a toy of this kind.
  • It’s expensive: about $205-220 in Canada (depending on where you get it from). HOWEVER, CurrentBody has it on sale for $145 USD at the time that I’m writing this, and that’s reduced even further to $116 USD (about $151 CAD) when you use my coupon code “GIRLY20” on your order. That’s a pretty sweet deal.
  • The plastic travel cover that it comes with is weirdly hard to open. You have to squeeze it and then rotate it, like the childproof cap on a bottle of pills. As someone with chronic pain and strength issues in my hands, I found this frustrating; it took me 5-10 minutes of struggling and pain in order to get it open the first time, so I haven’t attempted to close it again.

 

Final thoughts

The Lora DiCarlo Baci has impressed me so thoroughly that I’d put it in my top 3 favorite pressure-wave toys now. (The others, if you’re wondering, are the Lelo Sila and Satisfyer Curvy 2.) This type of toy is always so hit-or-miss for me, with some of them giving me weak, half-ruined orgasms and some of them making me come so hard and fast that I practically black out; the Baci is definitely in the latter category.

I can’t confirm for certain whether all the claims made by Lora DiCarlo about their toys and technologies are accurate. But what I can tell you is that the Baci is a top-of-the-line clitoral stimulator that I hope will usher in a new trend of companies pushing the boundaries of what a clit toy can be.

 

Thanks to CurrentBody for sending me this product to review! You can use the code “GIRLY20” to get 20% off your order at CurrentBody – yay!

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Bubblefunny Bubble Flower Beauty

Kate Sloan

As a big fan of receiving cunnilingus (what a great way to start a blog post), I have tried many an oral sex simulator in my time.

They have licked and flapped and sucked, some skilfully, some less so. But I never give up hope that the next one will be the one that really does feel like getting head from a talented and enthusiastic lover. It hasn’t happened yet, but hey, tomorrow is a new day.

That said, this latest addition to my collection of cunnilingus simulators – the Bubblefunny Bubble Flower Beauty – actually surprised me with how close it got to feeling like the real thing.

(There’s a coupon code at the end of this post incase you want to buy your own, FYI!)

 

What is the Bubble Flower Beauty and what does it do?

The whimsically-named Bubble Flower Beauty is a dual-stimulation toy: there’s a mechanized silicone tongue on one end, and a phallus on the other end that thrusts and vibrates; between the two is a flexible silicone cord.

Bubblefunny recommends various different uses for it, including slipping the thruster into your vag while the tongue teases your butthole, but I think the main usage the toy designers had in mind was probably having the tongue stimulate the user’s clit while the thruster pleasures their G-spot. (That’s the only way I chose to test this toy, anyway. I’ve got nothing against rimjobs, I just didn’t want one from a robot.)

 

Things I like about this toy:

  • Firstly and most importantly, I actually love the tongue. It’s made of soft silicone with just enough flexibility to feel comfortable and just enough firmness to feel impactful. (Cunnilinguists-in-training, take note.) I won’t say it feels like a real human’s tongue, both texturally and size-wise, but it is in that general neighborhood of sensations. It starts at a pretty fast speed – like, way faster than any partner of mine would ever start licking me – but it slows down slightly with pressure, which I found actually felt better for me.
  • The design of the toy allows you to move the tongue around your clit while you’re using it, so you can stimulate the tip, the sides, the hood, etc. as your whims dictate. I strongly prefer indirect clitoral stimulation, so I love being able to switch up the toy’s location, turn it upside-down, and so on, to get the type of stimulation I’m craving. In some ways, I think that more advanced cunnilingus simulators have failed by trying to replicate the dynamic motions of a human; being able to hit the exact right spots yourself, exactly when you need to, can be better than having a machine try to guess where they are.
  • The orgasms actually remind me a lot of the orgasms I have from real oral sex. There’s a similar slow build, and a similar sense of teetering on the precipice of coming for longer than usual before going over the edge. However, as with real cunnilingus, I find that this toy works best if I maximize my sensitivity before I use it, by taking a break from vibrators and/or orgasms for at least a day, shaving my pubes, holding my outer labia open, smoking weed, or some combination thereof. It’s not quite enough to get me off if I’ve had an orgasm recently or if I’ve used strong vibes in the past day or so.
  • Although there are only three steady speeds (more on that below), the tongue’s motions do get noticeably faster and harder when I click up to the next speed.
  • This toy is waterproof! Hooray!
  • It comes with a cute black velvet storage bag that doesn’t shed lint all over the toy, like cheap storage bags tend to do. Nice touch.

 

Things I don’t like about this toy:

  • The tongue often doesn’t quite feel powerful enough to get me off, especially since it slows down when pressure is applied to it. I find that I always have to either thrust against the toy or rub it up and down or in circles against my clit, or I won’t be able to get off. That said, sometimes I thrust my hips during actual cunnilingus for the same reason, so maybe it’s just authentic like that.
  • Both the tongue and the thruster only have three steady speeds, followed by seven patterns. As someone who uses steady speeds almost exclusively, I find this disappointing. And sometimes orgasm-ruining, if I hit a button by accident while already on the third steady speed.
  • Speaking of buttons, there are only two of them. Two is better than one in this case, certainly, but it’d be really great if it had four: an “increase intensity” button and a “decrease intensity” button for each part of the toy. I hate having to cycle through all the patterns to get back to the speed I was using before.
  • My preferred way to use the tongue is upside-down, because that way it’s licking downward on my clitoral hood, rather than flicking upward against the hypersensitive head of my clit. However, when used this way, the buttons are on the opposite side of the toy from you, which makes it tricky to hit the right one in the heat of the moment.
  • The thruster tends to slip out of me during use, especially if things are especially lubed-up down there. I would actually recommend using less lube than you normally would, or perhaps even none at all, on the thruster part of the toy, to give it a better shot at staying inside you.
  • The cord is just slightly too short (for my anatomy, anyway), so I often find myself accidentally tugging the thruster out of my vag while I’m adjusting the tongue.
  • The vibration of the thruster is pretty damn buzzy. I actually think I’d like the thruster better if it was just thrusting and not vibrating, since the buzzy-as-fuck vibration kind of mutes the sensation of thrusting. But you can’t separate the two in this toy; they’re a package deal.
  • So far as I can tell, once you’ve activated either part of the toy, there’s no way to turn it off without turning off the whole toy, which takes a few seconds. So, for example, if you decided mid-session that you wanted to shut off the thruster and just focus on the tongue, there would be no quick and easy way to do that.
  • You have to put a fuckton of lube on your vulva before you use the tongue, or it’ll feel like receiving head from a Tinder boy who’s baffled by vulvas and has a dry mouth from smoking too much weed. (Can neither confirm nor deny that this has happened to me.) When testing this toy, I’ve mostly used a coconut oil-based lube I’ve been loving lately, and I actually think natural oil-based lubes (if you’re not too prone to getting infections from them) are the best pick for this type of toy, because they won’t react poorly with silicone toys like silicone-based lubes do, and they won’t dry up every few minutes like water-based lubes do.
  • The product page says that this toy sucks and licks, but there is no sucking to speak of. I tried pressing the toy firmly enough against my vulva that it would have created a seal if any suction was indeed happening, and all it did was slow down the tongue enormously.

 

Final thoughts:

I know I had a lot of critical things to say about the Bubblefunny Bubble Flower Beauty, but it actually is one of the better oral sex simulators I’ve tried. It gets me off (usually), and the orgasms feel, if not as good as those that happen in my partner’s mouth, at least somewhere in that direction.

I wish the thruster portion of the toy had been executed better – it feels like an afterthought, with its buzzy vibrations and tendency to shimmy out of my vagina – but the tongue part of this toy is really the star of the show anyway. I would happily use a version of this toy that was just the tongue. Sometimes you just need a little oral action, and head from a silicone gadget is better than no head at all.

 

Thanks to Bubblefunny for sending me this toy to review! You can use the code “GJ20” to get 20% off anything on their website. Maybe you want a wand vibrator shaped like a person? Or perhaps a clitoral stimulator that looks like a moon? This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

4 Unique Sex Toys I’m Extremely Curious About

Kate Sloan

CalExotics Impulse Intimate E-Stimulator Remote Dual Kegel Exerciser

I’ve been curious about the pleasure possibilities of genital electrostimulation ever since the Jopen Intensity E-stim vibrator was introduced in 2012 or so. It was a rabbit vibe that purported to rhythmically zap your Kegel muscles so as to trigger muscle contractions, which would be, in theory, pleasurable. I’ve also heard many stories and rumors over the years about electrostim’s supposed ability to trigger actual orgasms, in much the same way as “ram ejaculators” are used to collect precious semen from prized livestock. I’ve heard that this method, known as “electroejaculation,” can be used to help paraplegic or quadriplegic men ejaculate so they can have biological children, for instance, which is fascinating.

This Kegel toy isn’t doing anything that sophisticated, but it works on a similar principle. Apparently it sends out electric pulses to your pelvic muscles, making them contract and relax rhythmically and thereby promoting increased muscle tone, which can lead to stronger, longer orgasms. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be brave enough to apply electricity to my genitals, no matter how mild it may be – but this toy certainly makes it seem easy, not to mention tempting.

 

Fantasy For Her Ultimate Pleasure

I’ve tried several times, in vain, to get sex toy shops to send me this toy to review – but they’ve always chosen to send me other toys from my list instead. I think the reason is that this one is pretty expensive ($159.99) and unconventional, so it’s a risky choice to send to a reviewer. But I’m just so curious about it!

It seems like every sex toy store on the internet now sells oral sex simulators. I’ve tried many, and they achieve their goal to varying degrees of success. But this one is unique in its mechanism: it pairs a motorized “tongue” with both suction and vibration. I think – but do not know for sure – that this toy would actually feel somewhat like the kind of oral sex I tend to prefer, unlike pressure-wave toys like the Womanizer and Satisfyer, which create suction in a less direct way than this toy does.

Would it be fantastic? Would it be disappointing? I have no idea, but I’d like to find out.

 

CalExotics “Nipplettes” vibrating nipple clamps

I had to write about these for a copywriting client of mine and couldn’t stop giggling over them being called “nipplettes.” How delightfully absurd.

Despite having worked at two different adult shops that carried them, I have never actually tried vibrating nipple clamps. The clamps themselves are typically enough for me – I am a masochist, after all. But I also know that I’ve occasionally enjoyed holding a small vibrator against my nipples while warming myself up for a masturbation sesh, so I wonder if these vibrating clamps would take that relatively mild pleasure to the next level.

I imagine they’d at least be a good solution for people who love nipple stim but don’t want to have to constantly provide it for themselves during sex. Sometimes you want to do other stuff with your hands, y’know?

 

Pipedream Extreme Fuck My Cock

Okay, this one is a bit silly. And yet somehow also fascinating.

There’s a whole range of “adult novelties” marketed at cis men that are based on fantastical premises. I mean “fantastical” in the sense of “having to do with one’s fantasies.” Almost no one probably wants to actually fuck a tiny disembodied human butt attached to a big disembodied human dick, but I can see how a lot of people might want to fuck something that feels good and looks like a butt, while simultaneously being able to ogle and stroke a dick other than their own. If butts and dicks are a huge focus of your fantasies, this stroker probably seems like a literal dream come true.

Other such fantasy-based strokers I’ve seen included a vagina placed uncomfortably close to a pair of boobs, a tube with a mouth at one end and a pussy at the other, and even a vagina embedded in what appears to be a football, presumably for the benefit of horny jocks (Google it if you dare). While these types of toys often feel objectifying in a vaguely misogynist way, they certainly do tap into some people’s fantasies… sometimes resulting in creations that would give Picasso and Escher a run for their money. If the uncanny valley were an orifice, it would be this stroker.

 

This post was sponsored by IntimateNeed.com, which carries over 3,000 different products! As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Lelo Sila

Kate Sloan

Sometimes when I get high, I start rambling about clitoral politics.

“Clitoral politics, huh?” my spouse said, half-suspicious and half-amused, when I brought up this phrase during a recent intoxicated soliloquy.

“Yes. Let me explain,” I said, and I did. See, I’d been reading Kink earlier that week, which is a book of short stories about sex, power, sensuality, etc. written by famous authors who mostly are not known for lewd work. One of those authors is Roxane Gay, who I admire very much – and notably, at one point in her story, she used the phrase “base of my clit” to describe the particular pleasure point where her protagonist was being stimulated. This made me very happy.

As previously discussed, when it comes to clitoral stimulation, indirectness is my jam – and when it comes to oral sex in particular, full-mouth stimulation (as opposed to surface-level tongue-flicking) is my preference. Although my clit is average-sized, these methods necessitate an understanding of the clitoris as a three-dimensional structure. The glans of a penis isn’t the whole penis, and the glans of a clitoris isn’t the whole clitoris. Even setting aside the huge portion of the clitoris that is buried inside the body, even the external portion of the clit has a head, a shaft, and – yes – a base. (Thanks, Roxane. You are thought-provoking as ever.)

I hopped onto Google and searched some phrases relevant to this line of thinking. When I saw that the phrase “shaft of my clit” brought up only 3 pages of results, and that one of those results was a sex toy review on my own blog, I knew I needed to talk more about this stuff. When I invoke the phrase “clitoral politics,” what I mean, mostly, is the sociocultural import of discussing the clitoris as a three-dimensional object, as a major source of pleasure and orgasms, and as a structure more complex and worthy of study than the vast majority of mainstream sex publications even hint at.

This brings me to the Lelo Sila. Like many sex toy enthusiasts, I have a love/hate relationship with Lelo that has leaned harder on the “hate” side of the spectrum in recent years. Their structurally problematic condoms, needlessly sky-high prices, and baffling decision to hire a known domestic abuser as their spokesperson have all made me wary of them. But they made the Sila, and, well… on at least the topic of clitoral politics, the Sila and I seem to be aligned with one another.

The Sila is yet another toy that uses “sonic waves.” Every company that makes one of these toys seems to have a different name for them; Satisfyer uses “air-pulse technology,” Womanizer prefers “pleasure air technology,” and Dame favors “pressure wave technology.” These toymakers usually claim that their take on the technology in question is somehow unique, and I don’t have the mechanical knowledge necessary to confirm or dispute that. I can tell you that even as a seasoned sex toy reviewer, I often have trouble discerning and describing the differences between these toys’ sensations. There are definitely some pressure-wave toys I like better than some others, but I often have trouble explaining why, even though it is my literal job to do so. They just don’t seem to vary as much from toy to toy, sensation-wise, as, say, dildos or butt plugs can.

Dat mouth, tho

The Lelo Sila is different, though, because of the way it is shaped. It has a very wide “mouth” for this type of toy, because it is designed to envelop not just the tip of the clit, but the external clit in its entirety. “Build your sexual experience with [the Sila’s] softer, deeper, and overall bigger mouth that will give you complete satisfaction from top to bottom,” Lelo says in the toy’s marketing copy, and (uncommonly for sex toy marketing copy) they’re actually right: the Sila’s opening is wide and deep enough to enclose my clit all the way down to its base. (Ooh, that phallic language is making me nervous to type out. That’s how I know I need to keep typing it!)

Toys designed for cis women don’t generally do this. Maybe there’s a perception that we won’t enjoy this type of stimulation, because it’s too blowjob-esque. The qualities I’m extolling here are many of the same ones that make the Sila a potentially great toy for transmasculine folks with testosterone-induced bottom growth. But cis women can enjoy that type of stimulation too – and enjoy it, I do.

The Sila’s mouth also has a wide, flat silicone ring encircling it – its “lips,” if you will – which presses against the space between my outer and inner labia when my clit’s inside the toy. This has the effect of stimulating not only my labia but also the deeper, buried “legs” of my clit that lie under the surface in that area. (The flat ring also enables the Sila to maintain a better suction seal around my clit, a chronic problem with this type of toy, especially when I close my thighs tight around it.) What results is a much more full-bodied, satisfying sensation than the typical clit stimulator would ever be able to provide.

Some of my sex toy reviewer friends – including Rae at TheNotice.net, who also reviewed this toy – have noted that the Sila isn’t as powerful as they would prefer. I only ever seem to use the first 3-5 of its 8 speeds, though, because the deep rumbly sensation of the toy stimulating my entire clitoral shaft is apparently enough to get me off even without a ton of power behind it. (I guess this is also why I adore the Eroscillator, which thrums my internal clitoris marvelously but has been decried by many other sex toy reviewers as not powerful enough.) I would agree that this toy is probably not the ideal thing if you’re a fan of, say, super strong wand vibrators, or intense direct clit stimulation. But it’s not wimpy, either, and gets me off with a speed and ease that many other pressure-wave toys could only dream of.

A major elephant in the room here is that the Lelo Sila costs $169 (nice) in the U.S., and $219-229 in Canada. A friend recently asked me if she should buy a Sila, having never tried a pressure-wave toy before, and I strongly cautioned her against it – because if you’ve never put one of these things on your clit, you can’t really know for certain if you’ll like it, and I wouldn’t want anyone to waste $150+ on a toy they might never use again. My advice would be to start with a much cheaper toy from this category, like the Satisfyer Pro 2 ($50). If you try one, and enjoy the sensation but wish the toy’s mouth was wider and deeper, then you’ll probably dig the Sila.

Notably, my orgasms with pressure-wave toys are different than my orgasms with other toys, and not always in a good way. There’s something about the novelty and speediness of the sensation that sometimes causes me to have a small, shitty orgasm all of a sudden, before I’m able to even realize what’s happening and dial back the stimulation. It reminds me of porn bloopers I’ve seen where a cis male performer comes sooner than he’s expecting to, unable to hold it back. That idea turns me on a lot in porn, but for myself, I’d rather have a more deliberate and more intense orgasm, even if it takes more time and effort. A lot of my orgasms with the Sila have been of the “Wait, was that an orgasm?” variety, despite how good the toy feels up to that point. It’s really weird and probably has to do with the indirectness of the “touchless” sensation.

I’ve had good orgasms with pressure-wave toys; they’re just less common for me than they are with vibrators and oscillators, for whatever reason. But even when I’m just using the Lelo Sila as a warm-up toy, planning to finish myself off with my hand or another toy later on, it still feels pretty damn excellent. I can take it in the bath, or use it hands-free while reading erotica, or fantasize about incredible oral sex while it’s pressed against me. It does something that no other toy I’ve tried has done: stimulates my entire external clit, from base to tip. It may not be transformative, as far as clitoral politics go, but it’s a start.

 

Thanks to Lelo for sending me this toy to try! You can get one at SheVibe ($169.00) or Peepshow ($169.99).