Review: Njoy Disco

When my friends at Peepshow Toys reached out and asked if I wanted to review the newest toy from Njoy, the Disco, I replied as soon as I saw the email: “YES PLEASE!! SEND IT OVER IMMEDIATELY!!”

…Okay, that’s not literally what I said. I was much more polite about it. I am a professional, after all! But the point is: my response was enthusiastic and unambiguous – because it’s been years since Njoy released a new toy.

Their existing lineup is legendary: the Njoy Pure Wand is widely considered the best G-spot/P-spot dildo, capable of inducing squirting and prostate milking; the Njoy Pure Plugs are the most comfortable and pleasurable anal toys I’ve ever tried; and the Njoy Eleven is a gratifyingly huge chunk o’ steel that reliably makes me come so hard I cry, and was also pivotal to how I met my partner. Needless to say, I have a lot of history with Njoy toys, so I was verrrrry curious about the first new product they’ve released in my entire time in this industry!

Njoy founder Greg DeLong reportedly used to bring prototypes of Njoy works-in-progress to parties at sex conferences, and the Disco is one he’s been showing off in this way for many years – so, while I’d heard stories from my sex blogger friends about its beautifully bizarre shape, I was eager to experience it for myself.

What the hell is the Njoy Disco? What is it for?

This was my main question about the Disco before I tried one, and it’s still my main question about the Disco now, although I’ve figured out some ways to use it that work for me.

Most Njoy toys have some descriptive text on their product page which explains what part(s) of the anatomy the toy is best-suited to target, such as the G-spot or prostate. No such information is provided about the Disco, on Njoy’s website nor in the catalogue booklet that comes with the toy. The only information we’re given says that the Disco “is designed to bring a touch of sophistication to your intimate moments,” which is true of all Njoy toys, IMO, so it’s not very helpful! While I appreciate the way this kind of vagueness invites customers of all genders and anatomies to try the toy (which they definitely can!), I also think that some instructional materials, or even just suggestions, can be helpful for users of all experience levels. That’s especially true if your toy does something innovative or unusual that the user is unlikely to have encountered before.

And indeed, most users won’t have encountered anything like the Disco before. It’s shaped like five interlocking discs, some oriented vertically and some horizontally. The discs are graduated in size, like anal beads, ranging from 1.18″ to 1.96″ across – but the Disco is wider, firmer, and more oddly-shaped than anal beads tend to be. It has a slim neck and a flared base, like a butt plug – but it’s far too heavy, long, and pokey to work well as a butt plug. It has comparable dimensions to dildos I enjoy, with its 6.2″ of insertable length – but its shaft is totally straight, so it doesn’t target internal erogenous zones by curving into them, like many dildos do.

So what is the Disco for? I was only able to answer this question through research and experimentation. Reading other people’s reviews – including Smash’s, Felicity’s, and Ruby’s– gave me more information about how the toy can be used, including the insight that it may have been named the Disco because it’s intended to be rotated, like a disco ball.

Indeed, twisting and twirling the Disco seems to be the most effective way to use it, at least for me and some other reviewers. Each disc’s rounded edge rubs my G-spot every time I roll it against that zone. The way I use it most often is: I angle it slightly so it’s pressed against my front vaginal wall, I hold the base between my thumb and two fingers, and I twist back and forth in short motions. Sometimes I also thrust in and out in short strokes at the same time, so that the Disco massages my G-spot in circles.

By the way, I didn’t try this toy anally, on myself or on a partner, because 1) my spouse and I are 500 miles apart right now and 2) I truly don’t think my butt could handle this thing. But if you want some thoughts from someone who did use it that way, check out this Reddit post.

Things I like about the Disco

  • When I get into a rhythm with the Disco, it provides a unique type of G-spot stimulation I haven’t experienced with other toys. Instead of pushing into my G-spot or thrusting over it, the Disco can roll sideways across it (or in circles, depending on how I’m using it). I associate this sensation moreso with human fingering than with dildos, so it’s cool that I have a sex toy now which can give me that feeling. It’s gentler than some other G-spot stim methods, and doesn’t feel direct enough to consistently make me squirt, but it still builds me up to intense orgasms when paired with clit stimulation. (Heed my advice, though: use a lot of lube with the Disco, and get turned on before inserting it, or else its shape will feel more abrasive than pleasurable.)
  • There’s enough length on this thing that I can reach my A-spot with the very tip of it, which is helpful when I’m getting close to orgasm and want to push myself over the edge with some deep pounding. (However, if I was specifically craving A-spot stim, I’d reach for a different dildo – the Disco just barely nudges that spot, and lacks the curve it’d need to really get in there.)
  • The Disco is a limited-edition release: only 1,000 have been made, and each one has its own unique number etched on the base (mine is #0406). This doesn’t really have any practical benefits, of course, but it does make the Disco feel like a piece of sex toy history that many sex toy nerds would be glad to own. (Incidentally, as a completionist, I really need to get my hands on a small Pure Plug eventually, as then my partner and I will own the entire Njoy lineup between the two of us!)
  • The Disco comes with a gorgeous storage/travel case, which is metallic silver to match the toy and has a luxe-feeling magnetic closure. The case is just the right size that you could store the Disco in there and also throw in a miniature bottle of lube or a bullet vibe when traveling.
  • I like the triangular shape of the handle; I find it a bit more comfortable and ergonomic to hold and thrust with than the oval-shaped handles on the Pure Plugs. The triangle shape also seems to make the twisting-back-and-forth motion easier to achieve.
  • The shape of the toy and its handle is such that you could use it on someone while going down on them. The back-and-forth twisting you can do with the Disco is a smaller motion than the thrusting you’d do with most dildos, so maybe it would be less demanding/distracting for the giver than other dildos when used this way.
  • As expected for any Njoy toy, the Disco is stunning to look at. It’s a literal work of art. You could display it on your mantelpiece. You could have a still-life portrait painted of it and hang it on your wall. Njoy wasn’t kidding around when they described the Disco as “a testament to the fusion of pleasure and artistry.”

Things I don’t like about the Disco

  • The main problem I have with the Disco is that the twisting motion it requires (if you want to use it that way) is very different from how most people will be accustomed to using a dildo. There’s a learning curve initially, during which you’ll need to experiment and figure out how to use the Disco in the ways that feel best for you. I find it most comfortable to orient the handle vertically and gently jiggle it back and forth, but even that can get tiring/painful for my sore fingers and wrists, in a way that reminds me of using an un-ergonomic computer mouse for too long.
  • It’s really heavy for a sex toy – 3.25 lbs, which is even heavier than the Eleven (2.75 lbs). Granted, the Disco is a toy that you’ll (probably) just gently twist back and forth, rather than thrusting it in and out, so the weight isn’t as cumbersome as it otherwise might be – but it still tires out my arm and hand pretty quickly on days when my chronic pain is flaring up in those areas.
  • It’s quite expensive, at $180 USD. Certainly not as expensive as the Eleven ($400), but significantly pricier than the Pure Wand ($120), which I think would be a smarter buy for most people because it’s easier to use.
  • As much as I love having partners fuck me with dildos, I’d hesitate to trust most people with the Disco, because its length, straightness, and firmness are a recipe for painful cervix-poking. Even I sometimes bump my own cervix with it when I’m using it.

Final thoughts

The Njoy Disco is an artistic triumph of a sex toy, one that wouldn’t look out-of-place in a glass case at a museum, but also looks fantastic on my nightstand.

I think you’re likeliest to enjoy the Disco if:

  • You like firm G-spot or prostate stimulation
  • You enjoy trying sex toys that do unusual/innovative things
  • You don’t regularly experience muscle weakness/fatigue/pain/etc. in your hands or wrists
  • You’re a diehard Njoy fan and want to own as much of their collection as you can get your hands on

As for me, I think it’s a magnificent-looking toy, with an interesting shape that leaves a lot of room for creativity and experimentation – but it’s not something I’ll reach for very often. If I’m craving G-spot stimulation, I tend to want it to be more direct and more foolproof, as with the almighty Pure Wand. Most of the time, I want A-spot stim, for which I prefer the straightforwardness of the Eleven. The Disco’s heaviness, and the finicky nature of the twisting motion, also make it difficult for me to imagine using it consistently, what with the chronic pain and muscle weakness I sometimes have in my hands.

But damn, am I ever glad I own one. Njoy toys are a sex toy nerd’s wet dream.

 

This review wasn’t sponsored; Peepshow just sent me the dildo and asked me to write about it, and since it’s an Njoy toy, I was thrilled to do so!

Review: Njoy Eleven

Review: Njoy Eleven

My job as a sex toy reviewer is essentially to answer the question, “Should you buy this toy?” and while that’s sometimes easy, it’s a challenge with the Njoy Eleven. It’s pretty damn expensive, usually retailing for $350-450 depending on where you get it. The bigger and firmer a toy is, the likelier it is to cause discomfort or pain when it encounters a body it’s incompatible with – and the Eleven is one of the biggest and firmest toys you can get your hands on, at 11″ by 2″ of solid stainless steel. In addition to all that, it’s also unwieldy, indiscreet, and not guaranteed to hit your G-spot.

When I told Piph I longed for an Eleven, she tried to talk me out of it. I’d read her review, so I knew she didn’t like it: she found it too heavy to thrust comfortably, and it didn’t hit her G-spot as well as she thought it would. “Trust my vagina on this,” she implored me. And while I do, generally, trust Piph’s vagina, I also trust my own – and it was telling me it wanted to be crammed full of stainless steel.

At DildoHoliday, I borrowed Piph’s Eleven from the communal bleach bowl and took it to my room. I paired it with a good clit vibe. I had an orgasm. And I fell in love. Heart-eyes-emoji, head-over-G-spot in love.

elevenhead

The object of my affections, I should explain, is the Eleven‘s larger end. The smaller, ridged side, at 1.75″ in diameter, is perfectly fine, but it lacks the pronounced curve and insistent girth that work magic on my G-spot. I use the smaller end as a warm-up, because my vagina may be experienced but it can’t handle two inches of steel right off the bat. So I work myself open using the smaller end, and it usually only takes a minute or two before I’m ready to turn the Eleven around and slide the bigger side into my vag.

Although steel is completely firm and unyielding, I often find it easier to insert large steel toys into my orifices, because they’re so frictionless. In fact, despite the Eleven’s enormity (and, you should know, it is fucking enormous), I almost never use lube with it. My natural lubrication is usually enough – but don’t try this at home, kids; I might just be a freak of nature. Lube is a good thing!

The large end of the Eleven locks in place behind my pubic bone and nuzzles right up into my G-spot. There’s really nowhere else it can go. It’s too big to be pushed in deep toward my cervix, and its flared head keeps it from sliding out of me before I’m ready to remove it. So it just stays exactly where I want it, and all I can really do is thrust it over my G-spot in small motions. Fortunately, that’s all the movement I need for the Eleven to feel fucking fantastic.

Piph and I disagree about which is better, the Eleven or the Pure Wand, and I know why. She likes direct, intense G-spot pressure, the kind best provided by toys with an extreme curve like the Pure Wand or Comet Wand. But as for me, I’ve learned that my G-spot prefers sweet, tender rubbing over aggressive pounding. I can appreciate the Pure Wand and other G-spot assailants of its ilk, but they serve up my pleasure with a side order of “need-to-pee” discomfort, and I’m not always down for that. So something that slides back and forth over my G-spot, rather than slamming into it or grinding against it, works better for my purposes.

And to that end, the bigger head of the Eleven feels divine for me. If I use it with a decent clit vibe, I can usually get off with the vibrator on the first or second setting, because the G-spot pleasure makes up for the lower level of clit stimulation. This combo has brought me to many a stellar blended orgasm. I love blended orgasms best because they leave me feeling incredibly sated and blissed out – and that’s particularly true of the Eleven, since its mighty girth is so satisfying for my muscles to clench around when I come.

Is this review even more graphic and detailed than mine usually are? That’s because the Eleven elicits feelings in my vagina that I can only describe as pornographic. I’m getting turned on just writing this review. Fuck, man. Get out of my head, you vexatious, tantalizing chunk o’ steel!!

The Eleven’s heaviness is one of the main issues some reviewers have with it. And that’s understandable. At 2.75 pounds, it is basically a dumbbell, fit for arm exercise regimens. I find I can get around this somewhat by bracing my arm against my thigh and angling my vag so my thrusts work with gravity instead of against it. (Horizontal thrusting with the Eleven is less tiring than vertical for me.) However, if you have any kind of mobility or strength issues in your arms, run far, far away from the Eleven. Something lighter but equally G-spotty, like the Seduction, will do you right.

Now, let’s talk price for a minute. I still maintain that you should try someone else’s Eleven before you buy your own, if that’s at all feasible for you. I wouldn’t want you to drop a ton of money on this thing and then find out that you hate it. But if you’re prepared to bite the bullet, here are some places where you can get an Eleven:

I can’t tell you whether or not you should buy an Eleven. All I can tell you is that I love mine, some people hate it, some love it, and you should certainly never pay full-price for one.

Beyond that, it’s up to you. Are your holes calling out for this massive rod of steel, like mine was? Or do you quake in fear of the Eleven’s size (and price tag)? The choice is yours, my friend…

Review: Pipedream Metal Worx XL Luv Plug

I loooove steel; it’s indubitably my favorite material for anal toys in particular. But there are some things you gotta know before you think about investing in a steel butt plug.

1. They’re probably not a great idea if you’ve never engaged in any kind of anal play before, because they’re heavy and immediately very noticeable. You might find the sensation a bit overwhelming; it’s like diving into the deep end without any swimming lessons. Try something small and silicone first.

2. They work with any lube, so use what you like. However, my across-the-board policy on anal lube is that I use exclusively thick, gel-like, water-based ones. I have yet to find a silicone-based lube thick enough to work for my butt, and despite the generalization that water-based lubes tend to evaporate quicker than other kinds, I find that types with a gel consistency last seemingly forever – or at least, long enough for me to get my butt jollies and then pop the plug out pain-free.

3. Be extra cautious when carrying or washing a steel plug, because it is bound to be HEAVY and you can do some serious damage with it if you’re reckless or careless. Don’t drop it in the sink, or you risk cracking your ceramic. Don’t drop it on your toes, or you risk cracking your bones. To quote Mad-Eye Moody: “CONSTANT VIGILANCE!”

4. Steel plugs must, must, must be designed ergonomically for the body, or they will be uncomfortable at best and agonizing at worst. Read reviews (like this one!) to get a good sense – though not a perfect sense, because everyone’s body is different – of whether the toy you’re thinking about buying is actually butt-friendly, comfortable, and seems to have been tested by actual humans at some point during the production process.

I was sent the Metal Worx XL Luv Plug and it’s okay but I have some quibbles about it. My butt has been spoiled by the best steel plugs in existence, the Njoy Pure Plugs, so my standards for steel plugs are high, but maybe that’s a good thing.

I just drafted a whole paragraph about how this plug is supposedly “extra-large” but isn’t actually that big, and how I suspected that the measurements on the product page must be inflated. But then I got out my tape measure, just to make sure, and apparently this thing actually is TWO INCHES in diameter, like it says it is. Holy shit. My vagina can’t even handle two inches of steel, let alone my ass. How is this witchcraft possible?! I guess the shape is so nicely tapered that it lets my butt smoothly transition from tiny tip to wide-ass middle. There is sometimes a little pain or discomfort if I don’t warm up properly by using a smaller plug for a while first, but it’s not too bad. (Definitely start with something smaller if you’re new to anal play, though. The Mini Luv Plug, for example.)

Basically all my problems with this plug are with its lower half, i.e. the neck and base. The upper half is fine – great, even. Properly sized, comfortably tapered, pleasantly heavy. Just fabulous, really.

But the neck… It strikes me as being too thin, even considering that butt plug necks are supposed to be thin to make the plug more comfortable and help it stay in better. This neck just feels so thin that it’s like I can hardly tell there’s even a plug inside me, once it’s fully inserted. It makes me wish I had just a little more girth to clench around. When I masturbate with a butt plug in (which I don’t do very often, but still), I like to have some sense that there’s something in my ass so I can imagine I’m being butt-fucked; this one feels almost imperceptible when it’s in because the neck puts no pressure or weight on the opening of my ass at all.

The base is the worst. It’s one of those terrible round bases that seems to have been designed by someone with no knowledge of the existence of buttcheeks. I can wear this plug comfortably if I’m lying down spread-eagled and my cheeks are wide apart (how d’you like that image?!) but if I’m walking, sitting, or doing normal human things, the (SHARP) edges of the base start to dig into my chubby butt. That feeling is about as far removed from “sexy” as I can imagine.

My other problem with the base is the sparkly clear crystal on the bottom. It’s very pretty, definitely an appreciated aesthetic touch, but it’s poorly designed. The middle of it is flat but the edges slope upward, so that if the toy is jostled at all while standing on its base, it tips over, usually resulting in it falling onto some part of my body in a painful way or rolling off my desk. Maybe other people don’t care about this, but dammit, I think a toy should be able to stand up on its own. If you can’t display it or stand it at the ready next to your bed, then what’s the point?!

I might recommend this plug if it were cheaper (as many Pipedream toys are), but it sells for $63 or more, depending on where you get it. For that price, you could have your pick of the small or medium Pure Plug, or spend just a little more and get the large. The Pure Plugs have a way better design than the Luv Plug, in that they feel super comfortable the entire time you’re wearing them, and they stay put when you put ‘em somewhere, whether that “somewhere” is your butt or your bedside table. You can also really feel them when they’re in – in a very, very good way.

It’s hard to go wrong with a steel plug, but the XL Luv Plug just doesn’t get it quite right. Better luck next time, Pipedream.

This toy was sent to me courtesy of Pipedream and PinkCherry. Thanks, babes!

Sex Toy Wishlist #4

Here’s another round-up of some sex toys I’d love to snap up one of these days!

1. Betty Dodson’s vaginal barbell – It’s the only sex toy ever to be designed by female masturbation guru Betty Dodson. She’s one of my heroines, and so naturally, I want her barbell in my vag, like, yesterday. She advocates using it for kegel exercises and for vaginal pleasure, and emphasizes that one of its best qualities is the way its weight keeps it inside without you needing to hold onto it all the time. Awesome.

2. Happy Valley Hottie – Happy Valley’s silicone is swirly and colourful and beautiful. The Hottie has been on my wishlist for a while because its dimensions are fairly close to perfect – 6 ¾” long, 1 ¾” wide. The ridge looks a bit intimidating but I think I could handle it if enough lube were involved.

3. Lelo large Smart Wand – Several reviewers have expressed disappointment about Lelo’s new-ish Smart Wands, but the large size seems to get less flack than the medium. It’s been reported that the large wand is very strong and rumbly – and dude, it’s waterproof. One of these days, I’m gonna want a Hitachi alternative I can take in the bath with me, and this looks like it can fill those shoes.

4. New Sensations Virtue Trio Massager – This badass-looking vibrator has a shape that’s very reminiscent of the Ophoria Beyond #3, i.e. the best G-spotting toy I’ve ever come across, which has tragically been discontinued. I’ll definitely be keeping an eye on the reviews for this one, to see if it measures up.

Review: Njoy Fun Wand

It’s been said before, but… the Njoy Fun Wand is no match for its older sister, the Pure Wand.

Don’t get me wrong. Njoy makes gorgeous, flawless, luxurious, top-tier toys that I would not hesitate to recommend to anyone. But unless you have very specific needs that the Pure Wand cannot meet, that’s the toy I would recommend over any other Njoy product.

The Fun Wand is a versatile piece of steel. One end has a 1″ tapered bulb which can massage the G-spot; the other end, consisting of 3 smaller graduated bulbs, can also be used for G-spotting but is most effective when you put it in your butt. There is no denying that the Fun Wand feels good anally, but it’s not “oh my god, how did I live without you” good – more like “hmm, that feels nice – what’s next?”

The G-spot end is lovely too, but likewise, I find it only satisfies me for the first little while of any masturbation session, after which point I crave something bigger and with a more extreme curve. The Fun Wand’s “S” shape is beautiful to look at, but it’s not enough for my G-spot and it’s also not very ergonomic; it curves away from the body when inserted, making it slightly uncomfortable to grasp and thrust with.

The one satisfying use I’ve found for the Fun Wand is for G-spot stimulation when my vagina is sore (I think I’m coming down with another case of BV, ugh). Because it’s thin and naturally cold, it strikes a balance between soothing and pleasurable when my vag can’t handle something girthier.

I’d only recommend the Fun Wand to you if you have an extremely tight vagina or if you’re looking for a very luxurious ripply anal toy. Otherwise, save yourself the disappointment and pick up a Pure Wand from the get-go – it truly is the Cadillac of penetrative toys.