Review: Njoy Eleven

Review: Njoy Eleven

My job as a sex toy reviewer is essentially to answer the question, “Should you buy this toy?” and while that’s sometimes easy, it’s a challenge with the Njoy Eleven. It’s pretty damn expensive, usually retailing for $350-450 depending on where you get it. The bigger and firmer a toy is, the likelier it is to cause discomfort or pain when it encounters a body it’s incompatible with – and the Eleven is one of the biggest and firmest toys you can get your hands on, at 11″ by 2″ of solid stainless steel. In addition to all that, it’s also unwieldy, indiscreet, and not guaranteed to hit your G-spot.

When I told Piph I longed for an Eleven, she tried to talk me out of it. I’d read her review, so I knew she didn’t like it: she found it too heavy to thrust comfortably, and it didn’t hit her G-spot as well as she thought it would. “Trust my vagina on this,” she implored me. And while I do, generally, trust Piph’s vagina, I also trust my own – and it was telling me it wanted to be crammed full of stainless steel.

At DildoHoliday, I borrowed Piph’s Eleven from the communal bleach bowl and took it to my room. I paired it with a good clit vibe. I had an orgasm. And I fell in love. Heart-eyes-emoji, head-over-G-spot in love.

elevenhead

The object of my affections, I should explain, is the Eleven‘s larger end. The smaller, ridged side, at 1.75″ in diameter, is perfectly fine, but it lacks the pronounced curve and insistent girth that work magic on my G-spot. I use the smaller end as a warm-up, because my vagina may be experienced but it can’t handle two inches of steel right off the bat. So I work myself open using the smaller end, and it usually only takes a minute or two before I’m ready to turn the Eleven around and slide the bigger side into my vag.

Although steel is completely firm and unyielding, I often find it easier to insert large steel toys into my orifices, because they’re so frictionless. In fact, despite the Eleven’s enormity (and, you should know, it is fucking enormous), I almost never use lube with it. My natural lubrication is usually enough – but don’t try this at home, kids; I might just be a freak of nature. Lube is a good thing!

The large end of the Eleven locks in place behind my pubic bone and nuzzles right up into my G-spot. There’s really nowhere else it can go. It’s too big to be pushed in deep toward my cervix, and its flared head keeps it from sliding out of me before I’m ready to remove it. So it just stays exactly where I want it, and all I can really do is thrust it over my G-spot in small motions. Fortunately, that’s all the movement I need for the Eleven to feel fucking fantastic.

Piph and I disagree about which is better, the Eleven or the Pure Wand, and I know why. She likes direct, intense G-spot pressure, the kind best provided by toys with an extreme curve like the Pure Wand or Comet Wand. But as for me, I’ve learned that my G-spot prefers sweet, tender rubbing over aggressive pounding. I can appreciate the Pure Wand and other G-spot assailants of its ilk, but they serve up my pleasure with a side order of “need-to-pee” discomfort, and I’m not always down for that. So something that slides back and forth over my G-spot, rather than slamming into it or grinding against it, works better for my purposes.

And to that end, the bigger head of the Eleven feels divine for me. If I use it with a decent clit vibe, I can usually get off with the vibrator on the first or second setting, because the G-spot pleasure makes up for the lower level of clit stimulation. This combo has brought me to many a stellar blended orgasm. I love blended orgasms best because they leave me feeling incredibly sated and blissed out – and that’s particularly true of the Eleven, since its mighty girth is so satisfying for my muscles to clench around when I come.

Is this review even more graphic and detailed than mine usually are? That’s because the Eleven elicits feelings in my vagina that I can only describe as pornographic. I’m getting turned on just writing this review. Fuck, man. Get out of my head, you vexatious, tantalizing chunk o’ steel!!

The Eleven’s heaviness is one of the main issues some reviewers have with it. And that’s understandable. At 2.75 pounds, it is basically a dumbbell, fit for arm exercise regimens. I find I can get around this somewhat by bracing my arm against my thigh and angling my vag so my thrusts work with gravity instead of against it. (Horizontal thrusting with the Eleven is less tiring than vertical for me.) However, if you have any kind of mobility or strength issues in your arms, run far, far away from the Eleven. Something lighter but equally G-spotty, like the Seduction, will do you right.

Now, let’s talk price for a minute. I still maintain that you should try someone else’s Eleven before you buy your own, if that’s at all feasible for you. I wouldn’t want you to drop a ton of money on this thing and then find out that you hate it. But if you’re prepared to bite the bullet, here are some places where you can get an Eleven:

I can’t tell you whether or not you should buy an Eleven. All I can tell you is that I love mine, some people hate it, some love it, and you should certainly never pay full-price for one.

Beyond that, it’s up to you. Are your holes calling out for this massive rod of steel, like mine was? Or do you quake in fear of the Eleven’s size (and price tag)? The choice is yours, my friend…

Review: Njoy Fun Wand

It’s been said before, but… the Njoy Fun Wand is no match for its older sister, the Pure Wand.

Don’t get me wrong. Njoy makes gorgeous, flawless, luxurious, top-tier toys that I would not hesitate to recommend to anyone. But unless you have very specific needs that the Pure Wand cannot meet, that’s the toy I would recommend over any other Njoy product.

The Fun Wand is a versatile piece of steel. One end has a 1″ tapered bulb which can massage the G-spot; the other end, consisting of 3 smaller graduated bulbs, can also be used for G-spotting but is most effective when you put it in your butt. There is no denying that the Fun Wand feels good anally, but it’s not “oh my god, how did I live without you” good – more like “hmm, that feels nice – what’s next?”

The G-spot end is lovely too, but likewise, I find it only satisfies me for the first little while of any masturbation session, after which point I crave something bigger and with a more extreme curve. The Fun Wand’s “S” shape is beautiful to look at, but it’s not enough for my G-spot and it’s also not very ergonomic; it curves away from the body when inserted, making it slightly uncomfortable to grasp and thrust with.

The one satisfying use I’ve found for the Fun Wand is for G-spot stimulation when my vagina is sore (I think I’m coming down with another case of BV, ugh). Because it’s thin and naturally cold, it strikes a balance between soothing and pleasurable when my vag can’t handle something girthier.

I’d only recommend the Fun Wand to you if you have an extremely tight vagina or if you’re looking for a very luxurious ripply anal toy. Otherwise, save yourself the disappointment and pick up a Pure Wand from the get-go – it truly is the Cadillac of penetrative toys.

Review: Ttamage Large Smiley Dildo (vs. Njoy Pure Wand)

When Matthew of Ttamage offered me my choice of item to review, I combed through his entire shop looking for anything that caught my eye… and when I saw the Large Smiley Dildo (hereafter referred to as the LSD – ha!), I knew it was meant to be.

I actually mainly requested it because of its resemblance to the Njoy Pure Wand, a toy I’d been flagrantly lusting after. Little did I know, I’d soon become a proud Pure Wand owner – and the two dildos would arrive in my mailbox on the same day! Naturally, I had to immediately snap a photo (see above).

I spent the next several days testing out both dildos (my life is so hard, huh?). And I’ve determined that the LSD is a great Pure Wand alternative, for anyone who can’t shell out the $100+ or just doesn’t like the Wand’s heaviness.

As you can see from the photo, the two dildos share a very similar curve. I’m not sure if this was an intentional Njoy homage on Ttamage’s part, but either way, it’s brilliant. The LSD, like the PW, goes straight for my G-spot – and because glass is firm like steel, it can deliver the same amount of deliberate pressure, too. I don’t think my G-spot can really tell the difference between the two toys; it just knows it’s being deliciously pounded.

The LSD is quite big, as its name would imply: it’s eight inches from end to end (in a straight line, not measured along the curve). I can’t even fit half of it inside me. This means that it offers a larger “handle” in use. This, in addition to its much lighter weight, might make it a better choice than the Pure Wand for someone who has issues with mobility or whose wrists get tired easily. Thrusting and rocking the LSD is a walk in the park compared to manoeuvring the unwieldy Pure Wand.

At the same time, though, that weight does have its benefits. Many people find that it allows the PW to put additional delicious pressure on the G-spot. If you need that weight-driven momentum that only a steel toy can provide, the LSD isn’t going to be much of a substitute.

Now, let’s talk about balls. The Pure Wand’s big ball is 1 ½", and its small ball is 1". I find that the big is too big and the small is too small. The bigger side stimulates my G-spot beautifully when I do get it in, but it’s not always comfortable to insert or remove – and I certainly can’t remove it in a hurry, which I might need to do if/when I learn to squirt. The LSD’s knobs are both 1 ½" wide as well, but they have more of a tapered shape, which makes insertion and removal easier. One of the balls is pointier than the other, so you can have a bit of variety if you want it.

In terms of care and upkeep, these toys are about equal. Glass and steel are both nonporous, body-safe, boilable, bleachable, and soapable. This also means that lube goes a long way with both of these materials – they’re pretty drag-free. I find that steel retains heat for longer than glass, but that’s not particularly important to me; if you like temperature play, you might lean slightly towards the Pure Wand on that point.

At $45, the Large Smiley Dildo isn’t going to deplete your wallet nearly as much as the Pure Wand. It’s easier to wield, and easier to insert. It may not feel as luxurious, or bring the heftiness of steel to its performance, but it is a damn good dildo and I use it pretty much interchangeably with my beloved Pure Wand.

A zillion thank-yous to Matthew from Ttamage for sending me this stunning dildo to review! Check out his incredibly elegant, handmade glass dildos and massagers, and let him know I sent you!