Tantaly

My Night With a Sex Doll (the Tantaly Mark)!

Kate Sloan

As I strolled back home from a great comedy show last night, I had a spring in my step. I’d just shared some laughs with pals, the weather was beautiful, and I had a date with a sex doll.

This date was a long time coming. I’ve collaborated with sex doll company Tantaly on a number of reviews before, but I’ve always outsourced the testing, because the brand always wanted to highlight their most popular products: dolls with tits and a pussy. Now, don’t get me wrong, I can appreciate tits and a pussy as much as the next bisexual – but I don’t have the anatomy required to actually fuck that type of doll, which is, of course, the expected usage of a fuck-doll.

In the course of doing those Tantaly reviews, I’ve managed to hook up three penis-possessing people in my life with a free sex doll, in exchange for letting me pick their brain about the experience for my review (or in one case, the person actually wrote the review himself – you should read it, it’s hilarious!). But sex dolls are the type of product that you typically wouldn’t want or need multiples of, especially if you live in a small apartment – so none of my testers were willing to test another doll, and there wasn’t really anyone else who I’d trust enough to give this responsibility to. (It might sound odd to describe sticking your dick in something as a “responsibility,” but my reputation and income would legitimately be on the line if a tester ghosted me after receiving their doll, so I have to be choosy about them!)

All this to say: When Tantaly reached out again recently to ask about another collab, I told them that at this point, I’d only be able to review a doll if I could test it myself… which meant it would have to be a doll with a dick. And guess what? They sent me one. His name is Mark. He’s actually lying in my bed right now as I write this. He’d probably be smoking a post-coital cigarette, if not for the fact that he has no head. Let me tell you about our date night!

Specs ‘n’ stuff

I want to get the technical shit out of the way up top, because frankly it feels weird to write about this doll like it’s just another sex toy, even though it literally is. But damn, it’s eerily humanoid. I mean, I know that’s the point, but I was really thrown by how much my brain wanted to categorize the doll as a person immediately. I full-body cringed from uncanny-valley weirdness when I unboxed Mark and looked at him lying there, so lifeless and subdued – except for his perpetually raging hard-on, which arched up out of his styrofoam coffin like a phoenix rising from the ashes – and yet so lifelike. I kept saying “Excuse me, sir” as I (wo)manhandled him into different positions, the same way I sometimes catch myself saying “Please” and “Thank you” to Siri. (You can take the girl out of Canada, but…)

The Mark doll is lifelike but not exactly life-sized; even accounting for its lack of a head/arms/legs, it’s still proportionately maybe two-thirds the size of your average dude. It’s 23.5″ tall, from its cut-off neck to the bottom of its cut-off thighs. But I would say that the doll’s most impactful measurement is actually its weight, because hoo boy is this thing ever heavy (33.7 lbs). To be fair, I have a chronic illness that impacts muscle strength, and I’m also just an out-of-shape weakling, but weight is a frequent complaint about sex dolls in general, even for people with actual muscle. These dolls do require a certain amount of heft so they can stay anchored in place when you’re fucking them/riding them – and they do that very well! – but I found it challenging to move the doll around at all. In fact, after coming, I was so tired that I barely managed to shove the doll over in bed so I could fall asleep beside him (and yes, it was a bit of a jump-scare waking up next to a headless man the next morning).

The Mark comes with a storage case, which has straps to make it easier to carry around – nice touch! There’s even a zippered pocket on the outside which is very roomy – you could easily fit a Magic Wand Rechargeable, big dildo, and full-size bottle of lube in there, no problem, with room left over for condoms or cock rings or whatever else you’re bringing to the hypothetical sex doll orgy you’re apparently jetsetting to in this scenario.

Except for its metal frame structure, the entire doll is made of TPE (thermoplastic elastomer), which has some big pros and some big cons that I’ll get into below. This doll costs $400 USD or $500 CAD. In addition to its lovely dick, it also has a fuckable ass with a textured interior; the doll comes with a moisture-absorbing stick to help speed up the drying process after you wash his butt out (what a phrase!), but as mentioned, I don’t have a dick with which to penetrate this thing, so I didn’t test out its butt beyond giving it a little slap or two, ’cause, y’know, when in Rome…

Too real, man

I’d never personally unboxed a torso before. I’d seen other people unbox them, in videos and on FaceTime calls, but it’s an odd experience to actually do it yourself. I was laughing, cringing and squealing as I lifted Mark out of the little styrofoam bed he came in – because he looked and felt somehow both very real and not real at all.

Certainly his physique doesn’t resemble many that I’ve seen in the wild, but the texture and appearance of his skin is quite lifelike, if a bit unnaturally cold to the touch. (Just imagine you’re fucking one of the Twilight vampires, it’s fine.) One nice thing about TPE is that it can indeed feel impressively skin-like on the surface – but this TPE formulation feels oddly soft for this particular application. Truly not trying to body-shame here, only to doll-shame, but in my limited experience touching super-muscly bodies like Mark‘s, they are quite a bit firmer than this. It’s especially strange in the chest region; I’m used to being able to leverage some of my weight against someone’s chest as I ride them, but my fist sinks into Mark like memory foam, which was a tad bit unsettling mid-bang.

But overall, it was an interesting experience for me psychologically to get my hands all over this doll, objectifying him, flipping him over, touching his junk, etc. It made me really aware of how inhibited I feel when touching human partners – there’s the constant anxiety, however low-level, that I might do a bad job, hurt them somehow, or look like I don’t know what I’m doing. I didn’t have to worry about any of that with the doll, so I was able to follow my in-the-moment desires without hesitation, tweaking a nipple here, smacking some balls there, running a palm along Mark‘s rubbery six-pack, and just basically being an unabashed perv. This ultra-toned body type isn’t what I’m usually drawn to – if Tantaly ever makes a sex doll with a lanky nerd bod or a cuddly dad bod, I’m so there – but I enjoyed the way it encouraged me to foreground my desires and my “female gaze,” like a Magic Mike movie.

Does yr girl know how to shoot a cock portrait or what?

Cock ‘n’ balls

Shout-out to those of you who scrolled down to this section immediately; I see you 😉

As you might imagine, this doll’s dick is spectacular, at least visually. (My wife didn’t think so, though; she took one look at it and immediately said, “What a weird dick! And the rest of him just looks like a woman!” – which I hadn’t really considered, but I guess Mark‘s pecs, nipples, and hourglassy shape have a certain Greek-statue-esque androgyny to them that probably makes this an especially suitable doll for me, a noted bisexual…)

But let’s get down to brass tacks: cock measurements. The insertable length is slightly over 6″, while its widest circumference is 5.75″, which works out to a diameter of about 1.8″. (And yes, I reflexively apologized to him out loud as I held a tape measure to his dick.)

Tantaly has done something similar here to what companies like Vixen Creations and Tantus do with dual-density silicone: this cock has a firm core, with a squishier outer layer on top, to create a realistically boner-like feeling. But in Mark‘s case, the firm core is part of the doll’s metal frame structure, and the outer layer is the same soft TPE that the rest of the doll is made out of.

And therein lies the rub (and tug): TPE is not the right material for this dick (or for any dick, frankly). It should be made out of silicone instead (like that of the Tantaly Mark Pro doll, of which more below). TPE is porous, meaning it clings onto some amount of bacteria no matter how well you wash it. So, while I really enjoyed sucking Mark’s cock for a while (after taking a damp washcloth to it, to wipe away any bitter chemicals remaining from the production process), I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing so anymore after he’d been used a few times, because the thought of the bacteria would gross me out. I likewise wouldn’t be able to sanitize his dick if, for instance, I wanted to use it anally and then vaginally, or wanted to share it with a partner I’m not fluid-bonded with, or wanted to avoid re-infecting myself after a bout of BV. I could put a new condom on it every time, sure, but it’d be annoying to have to do that, especially with such an expensive toy.

There’s another reason I wish Mark’s dick wasn’t made of TPE: it’s too soft! Now, look, this is a body-positive blog, and I certainly don’t mean to boner-shame… but in real life, if someone is having erectile difficulties, we can just switch to activities that don’t require a hard-on. This doll has no such capacity – he has no tongue, no fingers, no purple vibrating strap-on – and so, let’s face it, his dick is what he brings to the table. As such, it surprised me that his cock is so soft and squishy that it’s actually difficult to get it inside me, in a way that reminds me of that old Rodney Dangerfield joke about “shooting pool with a rope.”

I also just… couldn’t feel his dick very strongly as I was riding it, despite its moderate size, A-spotty curve, and firm core. I wanted to feel well-and-truly fucked, but it felt more like my insides were being gently massaged – nice, sure, but not orgasmic. I ended up nudging the doll aside in bed so I could lie down and get myself off “the old-fashioned way,” i.e. with a dildo and vibe. (I have, of course, linked to the actual toys I actually used, because I know I would be curious about that if I was reading this!)

All hope is not lost, however: Tantaly also makes a doll called the Mark Pro, which comes with three differently-sized removable silicone penises (!!!), making it not only more hygienic but also more versatile. The jump in price between the Mark and Mark Pro is $90 USD, which buys you three nice silicone dildos and some peace of mind, at the very least, so I’d say it’s worth it!

Regarding my own doll’s all-TPE genitals, though, one upside is that his balls look and feel very realistic, in a way that I found hot and weirdly transfixing… probably because I have often been wary of hurting partners’ balls if I touch them too zealously, so it was a fun novelty to be able to slap some balls around without fear of causing pain or permanent damage.

Sir, this is a Wendy’s

Was it good for you?

“Cowgirl” position (i.e. me on top) was the only one that seemed practical for my purposes. Mark is too heavy for me to comfortably place him on top of me in a missionary-style position, I’m not flexible enough for many other positions, and the very idea of backing up onto a doll’s dick in doggie-style is giving me pre-emptive thigh cramps just thinking about it.

Cowgirl isn’t a position I tend to favor in my sex life, because I lack the strength in my knees and hips to really accomplish the up-and-down motion that people with penises tend to prefer. But I’m much more able to sustain a smaller range of motion that, were I to do it with a human, would probably be more for my own pleasure than theirs, rubbing the head of their dick back and forth over my A-spot in short strokes and maybe grinding my clit against their pubic bone at the same time. Naturally, though, with a sex doll I was able to fully prioritize my own pleasure without having to consider what might feel best for someone else, and it was fun to experiment with different ways to ride a cock. (If PETA wants to update the “ways to skin a cat” idiom, I nominate that as a contender.)

Although it was fun to center my own pleasure in the way I rode the insensate Mark, my arousal only really kicked into gear once I started imagining he could feel pleasure, could experience desire and arousal and frenzied lust. I fantasized that the doll awoke into sentience (let’s disregard its horrifying headlessness for the purposes of this scenario) and discovered, to its surprise, that a cute gal (hi) was riding its dick, and that this was intensely pleasurable. I’ve employed similar fantasies in toy-testing sessions before, usually imagining that a dildo I’m testing has become sentient and sensate – but Mark’s humanoid torso added significantly to this fantasy for me. It was like an adult version of Pinocchio’s “I’m a real boy” moment… Peen-occhio? Is that anything?

Ultimately though, I was not able to reach orgasm with Mark, even when I used an ol’ faithful clit vibe while riding him. His dick just didn’t feel hard enough to contribute meaningfully to my pleasure – which annoyed me, because you literally had one job, dude. If Mark was a Ken doll, his job would be dick. But I’m not sure he’s a great fit for the position.

Nonetheless: Man oh man, I had so much fun testing out the Tantaly Mark. It’s definitely the most humanoid product I’ve ever reviewed in my 13+ years in this industry, and it was fascinating to observe how that affected my arousal, my fantasies, and even the way I addressed the doll in my own mind (he/it pronouns, baybee!).

I think a lot of people would really enjoy this doll, especially if they plan on making use of his ass in ways that I could not, so as to get their full money’s worth. As for me, call me shallow, but the dick was all I cared about – and it just wasn’t firm enough to give me the ramming I wanted, plus it’s made of a porous material. [sad trombone]

The Mark Pro is a really cool product, though, because it’s Mark with a dick you can detach and sanitize as needed. I haven’t felt its dick(s) myself, so I don’t know how the firmness compares to the TPE version – but if it was firmer, I think I’d have a much easier time coming all over it. And just think: If I found myself saying “Sorry” and “Excuse me” while just moving him around, I wonder what I’d say to him in the throes of an orgasm…

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Tantaly Britney sex doll

Kate Sloan
All images courtesy of Tantaly

Well, it happened again: I was offered a sex doll to review, and had to figure out who in my life was both 1) willing to receive and test the doll and 2) reliable enough to give me useful feedback on it so I could write a review.

This is one of those weird logistical problems that people never think about when they ponder the realities of being a sex toy reviewer. See, I don’t have a dick (except for the kind you can strap on), so I’m not a member of most sex dolls’ target demographic – and while my lovely and dependable partner does have a dick, they already reviewed a sex doll for me and were disinclined to make more room in their small New York City apartment for a new member of the family. Likewise, a friend who also reviewed a sex doll for me previously was (I assumed) not up to doing so again, having given away his doll to a friend (!) for reasons I can’t quite recall but that may have had to do with moving house and not wanting to lug a 68-pound torso onto a U-Haul truck.

So this time I asked another friend, someone I knew would give the doll a fair shot and tell me his uncensored thoughts on the experience. After he’d had a few weeks to test out the toy, I took him aside in his kitchen and we chatted about the finer points of the Tantaly Britney over prosecco and beer. It was yet another delightfully weird day in my career as a sex toy reviewer, although frankly, I’ve had weirder.

Choosing the Tantaly Britney

It might seem like it’d be exciting to receive a message saying, “Which doll would you like from this website?” but I imagine the decision can actually be somewhat daunting. Tantaly carries a wide array of dolls in varying sizes; the one my partner reviewed was a petite 14 pounds, but the more lifelike models can reach weights of nearly 70 pounds.

This time around, I asked my appointed tester why he’d chosen the Britney model, and he said, “It was the lightest, while still being the most of a person.” In other words, he wanted the realism of having a full torso-size doll, so as to more closely replicate the experience of having sex with an actual human – as opposed to just being a butt or whatever – but he didn’t want masturbation to turn into a deadlift workout. The Britney weighs in at a reasonable 28.6 pounds.

Interestingly, he also asked his partner for her opinion on which doll he should choose. I think this is brilliant, having seen – both in my own friend group and in hotbeds of online sex discourse like Reddit – the havoc that can be wreaked on a relationship if one partner buys a sex doll or another “big commitment”-type sex toy without their partner’s knowledge or approval. Your solo sex life is your own, certainly, and I’m suspicious of anyone who thinks they get to non-consensually control your masturbation habits – but at the same time, I can imagine feeling a bit blindsided and hurt if a full-size sex doll showed up on my partner’s doorstep one day and they hadn’t even asked me how I’d feel about them owning one, y’know?

Although he had already looked through the options and thought Britney seemed like the best pick, my friend showed his partner the site and asked which one she thought he should go with – and she actually liked the Britney best, too, because its breast size was more average than that of some of the cartoonishly busty models on offer. I’ve gotta say, when it comes to measures of compatibility, I can think of worse ones than “similar taste in sex dolls.”

Using the Tantaly Britney

Mr. Tester was, for the most part, quite happy with the Britney. He’d never tried a sex doll before, but had used strokers like the Tenga Flip Zero. He said that the dick sensations were pretty similar between the two, but the overall experience of using the doll felt “less clinical” and made it easier to imagine that the toy was a real person. This fantasy aspect is probably the main reason to consider getting a sex doll rather than a stroker, plus the fact that you can get on top of a sex doll and thrust into it in a way that can be hard to achieve with a stroker. (Something like a Fleshlight mount can make this easier to do with some strokers, however.)

The Britney doll has two “tunnels” – a vagina and a butt – and my friend didn’t observe much difference in sensation between the two. The main factor as to why he might pick one over the other for any given session was related to positioning: certain positions work better for one hole or the other, such as standing at the edge of a bed.

Having a squeezable pair of boobs right in front of you is also a strong selling point, and something that my friend enjoyed. I mean, I get it. Boobs are great. If you’re into them, they’re definitely a major benefit of having a doll rather than a stroker or a disembodied butt or pussy.

The main issue with the Britney – and with seemingly every sex doll – is the cleaning. All three of the people I’ve asked to review sex dolls for me have described the post-session cleaning process as “a production” – you have to wash the toy’s orifice(s) out right away, resisting the urge to bask in the pleasant afterglow of orgasm, because any jizz or lube you leave in there can eventually get moldy and ruin your very expensive sex toy. (Hot, huh?)

Smaller dolls like the Scarlett can be washed out in a sink (depending on the size of your sink, natch), but dolls with more lifelike proportions like the Britney will need to be dragged into a shower or bathtub for their ritualistic post-fuck ablutions. The physical effort of doing this, and of carefully rinsing out all the cum, can be annoying enough to deter you from using the doll as often as you otherwise might. My friend said he’d be likeliest to use this doll at times when he had at least an hour free – not because he lasts that long (he said jokingly), but because realistically that’s about how long the full process takes, from dragging the doll out of her storage spot and setting her up on the bed to washing her out and drying her off after using her.

Another problem is that these dolls are prone to leaching dye onto your sheets – but fortunately my friend had read the user manual before fucking the doll for the first time (always a good idea when you get a new sex toy of any kind!) so he was prepared for this eventuality and laid down a towel under the doll.

Final thoughts

My friend thinks the Tantaly Britney is a high-quality product for its $329.99 price point, and that if you’re in the market for a sex doll, this one is definitely worth considering. Its soft curves and pleasurable orifices make for a masturbation experience that feels much closer to partnered sex than using a stroker. Unlike some of the other pals I’ve asked to review sex dolls for me, this friend thinks he will actually use this toy on a semi-regular basis even now that the review is done, because in many ways it’s a significant step up from simpler/smaller/cheaper toys like those by Tenga.

But with great pleasure comes great responsibility, and when it comes to sex dolls, mainly that means cleaning. If you can contend with the aggravating need to wash out the doll immediately after using it – and if your living situation and physical strength are such that you can transport the doll back and forth to the bathroom or kitchen as needed without too much trouble – then you might be a good candidate to own a sex doll.

Real-life sexual partners may not require you to clean them after sex, and may not stain your sheets with their skin like a sex doll can, but there’s still something comforting and exciting about the near-realism of a doll like the Britney.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, everything I’ve written here is something I actually believe to be true.

Guest Review: Tantaly Monroe Realistic Sex Doll

Kate Sloan

Note from Kate: I asked a cis male friend of mine to review this sex doll for me, because my partner already has one and doesn’t have enough room in their New York apartment for another one 😂 Here’s what my friend thought about his new doll, in his own words…

I’ve always wondered what it might be like to own a realistic sex doll. But I never bought one because the high-end ones I looked at were pretty expensive, and I was afraid that if I owned one, someone might find it in my home and make fun of me. I wouldn’t want someone to know I spent so much money on that kind of thing!

So imagine my surprise and delight when my friend Kate asked me if I’d be interested in testing and reviewing the Tantaly “Monroe” sex doll… for free! And when I say “doll,” what I really mean is a headless, armless torso with thighs that cut off above the knee. “Monroe” is ostensibly named after Marilyn Monroe due to her elegant hip-to-waist ratio, though I don’t remember Marilyn having G-cup breasts. This thing costs over $900, so I figured it had to be pretty legit.

After following Canada Post’s tracking for over a week, I got a knock on the front door and found a box big enough to hold a dining chair. I don’t know why sex toy reviewers always feel the need to describe their initial unboxing when they’re going to immediately throw the box away, but what the heck, let’s do it anyway: They promised “non-descript packaging,” and wow they weren’t kidding. It was a cardboard box containing a compact styrofoam coffin, inside of which was a nude torso wrapped in plastic. Nothing in the way of presentation or pizzaz, not even so much as a ribbon tied in a bow; only a teeny instruction pamphlet and tampon-like “drying stick” used to dehumidify Monroe’s orifices when not in use.

Once I cut Monroe out of her powder-coated placenta, it was time to pick her up and carry her to the bedroom like some sort of extremely fucked-up “carrying my new bride over the threshold” situation. And, while I know it’s rude to say so, she is HEAVY! 68 pounds of totally dead weight, to be exact (though when she sat on my face it felt more like 69, har har). If you have less-than-average upper body strength, you should really take this into account when considering the purchase of a Monroe. I had to struggle laboriously up the stairs with her draped over my shoulder like a firefighter trying to rescue half of someone. My cat didn’t know WHAT the fuck was going on.

After tossing her onto the bed and catching my breath, I immediately had the urge to eat her ass. In real life, spontaneous ass-eating can be a risky proposition to say the least, but it’s been over a year since I’ve had the opportunity to eat any ass at all, so I dove in and it was a lovely experience. Then I flipped her over, spread her thighs apart ­ ­–which took more than a little bit of effort – and went down on her, fingering her in the process. While doing so, I suddenly thought about how wild it is that I finally have a lover who needs no foreplay and here I am warming her up just for the fuck of it!

Anyway, she was now on her back with her fabulously gravity-defying breasts pointed to the heavens. I gave them a few ham-handed squeezes the way I might have in a teenage wet dream. They felt nice to the touch (and I even licked a nipple which was kind of fun). With that being said, I’ve had a few dozen sexual partners and I feel confident in saying the texture of these boobs doesn’t mimic the feel of any that actually exist, unless there’s some cosmetic surgeon out there stuffing wads of “cyberskin” into patients’ mammary glands.

Now the time had come: I lubed up her vagina and, since it was a bit cold in there, I held my fingers inside for about 30 seconds to transfer some of my body heat. After getting hard, I got into position, slipped in there, and WOW

WHOA

I came extremely fast. To be fair, I was particularly aroused by the anticipation of this experiment, and it probably ratcheted my horniness up even more when I revisited my long-lost pastime of ass-eating, but Monroe’s vagina was far and away the most pleasantly stimulating fake pussy I’d ever been inside. In my lifetime, I’ve owned around 10 various masturbators that purported to mimic a real fuckable orifice and this one takes the cake. And by the cake, I mean the cum. The first time I slid my penis into it, I immediately felt that anxious “oh shit I need to slow down” feeling I often felt in my early sexual experiences. My penis is pretty thick, and I’ve occasionally run into sex toys that are so tailored to a small-to-average penis size that they’re either uncomfortable for me or they begin to wear prematurely, as I’ve found with my otherwise delightful ArcWave Ion. But this hole was neither too tight nor too loose… To mix metaphors, I felt like Goldilocks finding the perfect bowl of porridge to stick my dick into.

As a side note, I enjoy the fact that I can seriously rail this thing like an industrial piston. I’ve never been allowed to ram into a partner’s hole with all my strength. Here, I could do that and it felt amazing both in terms of sensation and raw caveman humpery. So there I was, probably less than a minute after penetration, breathing hard atop a buxom semen-filled effigy.

And that’s when I learned that cleanup is a bit of a process. It’s tempting to skip it directly after coming because you’d rather bliss out and not do an immediate chore. But from what I understand, failing to clean this product, especially after ejaculating inside it, is a quick way to get a nasty situation on your hands. Sadly, this vagina is not self-cleaning and its pH is not self-regulating. But a few squirts with a bulb douche and sort of “scooping” out the cum and lube inside – not unlike some intense G-spot stimulation – gets it reasonably clean. You just have to figure out where the water will go when it inevitably comes back out of there (or else your bed may end up looking like someone’s just experienced an absolutely legendary squirting orgasm!) Once you get as much water and jizz out as you can, you insert the included “drying stick.” By the way, Tantaly sells additional drying sticks as well as other maintenance accessories and even a USB-powered “heating rod” to warm the orifices before use. You’ll want to buy a second drying stick unless you strictly fuck one hole per session. Speaking of maintenance, one inconvenient thing about Monroe is that she must be stored lying down, meaning she’ll take up around 8 square feet of space in your home. In my condo, she lives in a trashbag on the floor of my closet like something you’d see on some nauseating true crime docuseries.

So anyway, that was round one. A few hours later, I remembered “Oh yeah, I have a naked torso on my bed!” and decided to go for round two. This time, it would be doggy style. I once again picked her up and flipped her over, and I have to say, it was not very fun to do so. Tantaly sells similar sex doll torsos that weigh much less, and I found myself wondering if I’d rather try one of them (though it’s possible that their relative lightness could make them feel less realistic). I had a difficult time getting Monroe into a position that felt right for doggy style. While she is highly poseable, her skeletal frame takes a lot of effort to adjust. This is for the best, since she would collapse too easily if her frame were flimsier, but when trying to get her into position, you feel like you’re fighting with rusty levers in some abandoned mad scientist’s lab. It often feels like you’re forcing someone to move against their will, which is slightly distressing if you dwell on it for more than a second. Moving her around on a bed adds the element of mattress bounciness which can make the process even more unwieldy. To successfully pose her in a “doggy style position” requires you to make sure her thighs are both positioned at the exact same angle (otherwise she’ll lean too far to one side)… It’s like trying to get a tripod perfectly level if the tripod’s legs were human legs with rigor mortis! Also, she has no knees, so in any “kneeling” position, her butt is lower to the ground than it would actually be if her legs were complete and intact.

To her credit, when you finally get Monroe into a doggy-style position it’s a truly beautiful thing; her ass is a sight to behold and unlike a real-life situation, it feels okay to stare and truly appreciate what you’re looking at. Unfortunately, after trying rear-entry PIV in a few varying positions, I realized that both the angle and position of her vagina are so optimized for the missionary position that they make full penetration from behind nearly impossible for an average-sized penis. I’m a little longer than 6 inches and I could barely get halfway in from behind. So I decided to grab the lube bottle again and head on down to brown town. Her anal orifice (or “tunnel” as it is called on Tantaly’s website) is anatomically realistic in its shortness, but just like the vagina, it is textured in a way that’s more stimulating than any ass I’ve ever fucked. I enjoyed squeezing her asscheeks as I went in and out – WHOOPS, I came again. This time I lasted a bit longer, but once again, I could see an orgasm on the horizon the moment I started. Mind you, I’m no two-pump chump. The few times in my adult life that I’ve finished really quickly were with particularly petite women whose anatomy made for a lot more friction and grip than usual. But even then, I lasted longer than what felt like 60-90 seconds in this case! As I neared orgasm, I thought “Pull out! Pull out! It’ll make cleanup easier!” but my usual failsafe (fear of an unwanted pregnancy) was absent, so… hey, I got another chance to rehearse the ol’ “douche n’ scoop!” This time I put a towel underneath her to catch the jizzwater.

The next time I fucked her from behind, I experimented with ways to make her position feel more anatomically accurate. At one point, I set her clavicles onto a small piece of luggage and put a small briefcase under her thighs to create the true position her body would be in if she were a real person in that position. In this way, I could squeeze her boobs while fucking her ass from behind. I enjoyed it, but setting it up was quite a production for what was – yet again – a very short ride. I’m honestly considering fucking her with a condom just to last long enough to fully enjoy the experience!

It seems to me that one of the biggest selling points for a toy like this is the realism of something anatomically proportional with a realistic amount of heft. But despite her realistic weight and size, Tantaly hasn’t so much achieved realism as an enhanced fantasy version of realism. The breasts don’t feel like breasts, but it would be hot if breasts felt like that. I don’t think there are any vaginas or rectums with internal “pleasure nubs” but it would feel amazing if there were. Most partners won’t want you to slam into their holes with the full force of your body, but it would be fun if they did. These factors all add up to the heightened “fantasy-realism” of Monroe.

Two more details before I wrap up: It’s worth mentioning that after 7 uses over the course of 10 days, I noticed one small part of her skin (on the outside of her right thigh) looked very slightly damaged, as if its very surface were slightly peeling off. This might portend an unexpectedly quick deterioration of her materials, but it’s possible that something I did unduly caused the damage. Also (get this) if you decide to get rid of Monroe, you cannot ethically throw her in the trash; she’s made of high-quality TPE, so she must be recycled AND she may also be labeled as “bio-waste” due to “personal use.” So enjoy telling your local recycling center how the neighborhood kids must have pulled a prank by leaving her in your blue bin.

But here’s the big question: Is Monroe worth nearly $1,000? That’s hard to say. For the sake of comparison, I happen to have gotten plenty of enjoyment out of a smaller masturbator from Extreme Restraints that looks like a disembodied cross section of buttocks and vulva in a doggy-style position. It doesn’t feel as good as Monroe, and it’s nearly impossible to get into a truly realistic position, but it also retails for only $140, it’s easy to store, and I’ve never felt arm pain the day after using it. On the other hand, let’s consider who would be the perfect candidate for this kind of product: I imagine a lonely, bored, and/or sexually inexperienced guy who also has deep pockets. Maybe he wants a chance to practice with a life-size simulated partner before he starts having real sex. Maybe he’s afraid he’ll finish too quickly and wants to build up stamina. He either has a fair amount of storage space in his home, or he has a place where she can stay permanently. This guy also would ideally have decent upper-body strength. If all of these traits describe you, dear reader, then I think Monroe would be a great purchase.

But for the rest of you, let’s look at the pros and cons:

PROS:

  • Amazingly-textured orifices
  • Exciting proportions for those who love curves
  • Weight & heft add to the realism
  • Seriously, WOW these orifices, just WOW
  • Realistic size can allow realistic sexual positions
  • Useful for stamina training

CONS:

  • Heavy and unwieldy
  • Somewhat difficult to pose
  • Vagina placement prevents deep penetration from behind
  • Inconvenient to store/must be stored flat
  • Requires disciplined maintenance
  • Skin may begin to (slightly) deteriorate after few uses

Keep in mind that Tantaly sells a line of torso dolls with a variety of weights and sizes, so if you’re intrigued by the pros but turned off by some of the cons, you might consider one of their other models. As for the Monroe doll, she’s a partner with a few qualities that are more amazing than I’ve ever experienced, but they come at a steep price and aren’t without some annoying quirks… Hey wait, maybe she IS realistic after all!

Note from Kate: If you want to buy your own Monroe, you can use the code “GJMonroe10” to get 10% off! This post was sponsored, which means we were paid to write a fair and honest review of the product that was sent to my friend.