theatre

12 Days of Girly Juice 2021: 4 Fun Events

Kate Sloan
Bex introducing me at the 101 Kinky Things book launch – photo by Rose Glass Photography

It’s hard to write this annual feature about events I’ve attended when I’ve (like all of you) been living through a global pandemic that limits the types of events we can safely go to – but I did manage to attend several cool happenings this year! Here are 4 of my faves that I went to…

 

Bawdy Storytelling

I’ve wanted to perform at the sexy storytelling event Bawdy for years, after seeing videos online of sex-ed heroes of mine like Mollena Williams-Haas, Allison Moon, and Tristan Taormino telling stories there. And when Bawdy moved onto Zoom during the pandemic, I finally got my wish!

It was so magical telling a romantic, sexy, strange story to the ever-enthusiastic “Bawdience,” even through a screen. Working with Dixie De La Tour to get the story up to snuff was like an oration masterclass in and of itself, and actually performing the story was a massive thrill. My fellow performers all knocked it out of the park too. I hope one day I get to attend a Bawdy event in person!

 

This American Wife

The theatrical weirdos at Fake Friends (and I mean that epithet in the most loving way possible) have done a couple of different livestreamed theatre events over the course of the pandemic, and I think This American Wife was my favorite of the two. The cast and crew had rented (or otherwise negotiated the use of) a giant mansion, and used it as their set for a twisty, dramatic, adoring pastiche of the Real Housewives franchise. It did things with the “Zoom theatre” format that I’ve never seen anyone else do.

Most surprising to me were the interludes where performers seemed to be telling real stories of their traumas and struggles, in the spirit of “reality TV,” only to later reveal that it may all have been theatrical trickery. It was a deeply disorienting piece of art, in the best way. I look forward to seeing what else Fake Friends get up to in the future.

 

Stay At Homo

The Toronto comedy scene has been a source of such joy for me during the pandemic, with their wacky Zoom improv shows and other online offerings. I was especially excited to see two of my favorite queer comedians, Tom Hearn and Ajahnis Charley, do a livestreamed sketch and music show called Stay At Homo. Originally it was going to be streamed from someone’s back yard but they had to move it indoors onto the stage of Comedy Bar for weather reasons, and as a result, watching it from home almost felt like I was back at that beloved venue.

The show (which you can still watch on YouTube) contained a bunch of solo sketches and musical numbers from these gifted performers. I laughed my ass off especially hard at Ajahnis’s song about being “a gay who loves basketball” – the bridge about “things that are both very gay and very basketball” makes me shriek with giggles.

 

 

Doing a hypnokink demo at the launch – photo by Rose Glass Photography

101 Kinky Things book launch!

Of course, I’d be remiss not to include my own book launch in this post! In October I held a little (vaxxed-people-only) event at the KGB Bar, a dimly-lit communist bar in the East Village of New York City. With the help of my “tech director” and wonderful spouse Matt, I was able to livestream the event over Zoom so people could watch it from home too.

There were readings from the book, signing of copies, and (most excitingly) a few live kink demos featuring me, Matt, and my friend Bex. It was so cool getting to demonstrate things like pre-scene negotiation, erotic hypnosis, and impact play to a crowd of eager literary perverts. Much love to everyone who attended, either in person or online, and to Matt, Bex, and our terrific photographer Ashe for all the help making this event happen!

 

What were your favorite events this year, online, offline, or otherwise?

Monthly Faves: Dildos, Diamonds, & Democracy

Kate Sloan

This month has been a weird one… but then again, I think I’ve been writing some version of that every month here since March… or maybe even since November 2016… *sigh* Anyway, here are some of the things that brought me joy this month! What are yours?

P.S. Uhhh, happy Halloween, I guess? Here’s a couple of relevant things I’ve written in the past, incase you wanna get into the spooky spirit a li’l bit: a review of the “Batcock” Vixen Leo dildo, and some thoughts on what a grown-up Wednesday Addams would keep in her sex toy drawer.

 

Media

• I re-watched American Horror Story: Cult with Matt this month and could not believe how relevant it felt to our current moment, geopolitically and socioculturally. AHS pulled no punches in calling out the gaslighting, fearmongering, and fascism of Trump-supporting sects, and it all felt eerily prescient.

• Someone on Twitter spoke highly of the 1997 thriller The Game so Matt and I checked it out, and… wow. It’s very unsettling, astonishingly well-acted, and reminds me a lot of the kink concept of “consensual non-consent.” Would recommend if you’re into CNC and/or the feeling of being consensually gaslit by a piece of media.

• The new book Ace by Angela Chen is a must-read if you’re interested in asexuality, whether you’re ace yourself, uncertain, or just want to understand asexuality and ace-spectrum identities better. I loved how this book covered the history of the asexuality movement along with the present-day obstacles it faces.

• If your Thursday nights are wide open these days, due to lockdown or other factors, I would highly recommend you join me in watching the Bad Dog Theatre’s live online improv show Theatresports for the next several Thursdays! It’s hosted by the incomparable and hilarious Tom Hearn (who showed up last week wearing the most over-the-top and beautiful false eyelashes and drag makeup) and really reminds me that, even though I love longform improv the most, shortform can be fall-off-the-couch funny too!

• The virtual play Circle Jerk – produced by Jeremy O. Harris, whose brilliant Slave Play was recently nominated for 12 (!!) Tony awards – was a delightful quick-change satire about, among other things, the problematic tendencies of the white gay male community. I’ve been fascinated by all the inventive ways that theatre artists are using the Zoom (etc.) medium for their art this year, and this was a particularly inventive usage!

• I just started reading Eleanor Herman’s book Sex with Presidents, which tells the tales of presidential sex scandals through the ages, and also speculates on the psychological and sociocultural forces that shape political leaders into sexual rulebreakers (or that lead sexual rulebreakers to pursue careers in politics!). Really interesting stuff for sex nerds and politics nerds alike.

• My favorite porn creator of the moment is Velvet Veronica, a soft-yet-mean femdom with a Canadian accent. She gives some of the best handjobs in the biz (IMO) and is a cocktease extraordinaire. Respect!

 

Products

• I tried out the Satisfyer app this month when my partner wanted to “go down on me” during phone sex, and it worked way better than I was expecting it to. As much as I adore We-Vibe products, I’ve had a ton of connectivity issues with their app, so I was surprised by how comparatively stable and reliable the Satisfyer one is.

• The Laid D2 granite dildo is still a current fave! My partner likes using it on me, too.

• I bought packing cubes in preparation for my journey to NYC (don’t worry, the airline was actually great about temp checks, mask rules, contact tracing, and social distancing, and there’s even free COVID testing available at LaGuardia now) and they have changed my life. Such a genius way to simultaneously organize all your clothes (underwear in one, T-shirts in another, etc.) and compress them down to a suitcase-friendly size!

• I’ve really been enjoying false lashes lately! (Meandering philosophical blog post on this topic to come, trust.) So far, my favorite pair I’ve tried is these House of Lashes ones in the “Cecile” style. Will prob wear them to my wedding!

• A recent findom gift from my love: this ultra-cute, tiny black leather crossbody bag with a chain strap. It’s kind of the perfect bag for the COVID era, in that I never really need to carry much more than a phone, a debit card, photo ID, and an extra mask when I go out these days… I’m hoping that in some far-off future, I’ll get to carry this to soirées, dance clubs, comedy shows, etc.!

• I mentioned The Sims 4 here last month and it still rules. Just wanted to add that if, like me, you are a non-monogamous and/or slut-positive Simmer, you can hit Ctrl+Shift+C and type in the cheat “traits.equip_trait trait_Player” and it’ll make it so that your currently active Sim can kiss/date/WooHoo with as many people as they want and no one will get jealous about it. Pretty perf.

• Um, obviously I would be remiss not to mention my engagement ring here?! It is still the most stunning thing I have ever owned… or maybe even seen… The other day we went and looked at wedding bands and I spent most of the time just staring at my engagement ring instead, tbh!

 

Work & Appearances

• The CBC asked me to write a piece on what dating is like when you live with chronic pain. It was fun/sad/cathartic/healing to dig up some of these old stories from the days when I was more active on the dating scene (and didn’t know as much yet about how my pain worked)!

• I was invited onto the What Women Want podcast, along with brilliant kinky writer Daphne Matthews, to discuss the kinds of messages/dates/etc. that put us off people and the kinds that actually excite us. It was an interesting chat that touched on kink, consent, respect, and gender, among other things!

• My friend Brent asked if I’d join him in guesting on the Man-Thing Minute, a podcast that celebrates Marvel’s Man-Thing comic. We had so much fun and I laughed so hard I cried!

• I also chatted with digital marketing expert Tod Maffin about how I wrote 1,000 blog posts. Tod and I have known each other online for nearly 2 decades so it was fun to catch up with him on his show!

• This month I put together ukulele arrangements for, and made videos of, two of my favorite songs at the moment: Alone Again, Naturally by Gilbert O’Sullivan, and Saw You in a Dream by the Japanese House. My partner and I have a new-ish protocol where I have to learn (or write) and record at least one song a month, and it’s been really fun so far!

• On the Dildorks this month, Bex and I did a two-part series about sexual boundaries, and then discussed 24/7 D/s dynamics and sexual sensitivity.

• In my newsletter this month, I wrote about how body dysmorphia fucks with sexual arousal, why so many of my Sims are queer, doing my first (sorta) cuckolding scene, where I fall on the asexuality spectrum, and why I love my engagement ring!

 

Good Causes

• Since the U.S. Supreme Court for some reason just gained a member who seems to think people with uteruses should be stuck in the past forever in terms of our rights and freedoms, now would be a great time to donate to an organization that fights for reproductive rights and/or offers sexual health services, such as the Mississippi Reproductive Freedom Fund, Arkansas Abortion Support Network, Yellowhammer Fund, or any of the other orgs on this list.

• The National Center for Transgender Equality could also use your donations now that the Supreme Court has stepped back into the dark ages.

• The ACLU is doing some fantastic work across multiple areas of the fight for civil liberties. Toss ’em your money in this scary time so they can do their best to fend off the darkness of bigoted fascism.

• Please, friends in the U.S., make sure you vote in this election! Obviously I want you to vote for the candidate who’s not a fascist megalomaniac angling for a dictatorship, and who hasn’t been directly responsible for the death of over 200,000 citizens of his own country, but hey, you do you. If you’re confused about voting for any reason (where to go, what to bring, where to drop off your mail-in ballot, etc.), check out IWillVote.com or BetterKnowABallot.com for all the deets. If you plan to vote in person, especially on election day, make sure you bring some snacks + water + entertainment, because you may have to wait in line a while. And wear your mask! (God, I sound like I’m trying to be your mom. Hey, whatever works.)