Author: Kate Sloan

Lube Week, Day 2: OO Lube

Kate Sloan

When I was offered some products from OO Lube to review, I said yes immediately. There are soooo many questionable lubes out there – lubes that contain vagina-hatin’ ingredients like glycerine, propylene glycol, and parabens – that any vag-safe product immediately gets my attention.

OO Lube is free of all those nasties. It’s water-based, so it’s safe to use with condoms and any kind of sex toy. If you’re shopping for a lube based solely on ingredients, it’s one of the best you’ll find.

I was sent a bottle of their warming lube, as well as samples of their original and tingling formulas. The bottle is really lovely; it seems to be made of aluminum, and feels very sturdy and durable. It has a pump-top, so you can easily get just as much lube as you need.

I should tell you right off the bat that I’m not a huge fan of tingling or warming lubes. I like a little bit of something tingly on my clit from time to time, but inside my vagina? No thanks, I’ll pass.

However, OO Lube is a bit different. The warming is created by cinnamon leaf essential oil, and the tingling comes from triple-distilled peppermint and eucalyptus essential oil. These are natural, organic ingredients, and I find that they’re less intense than the other hot or cold lubes I’ve tried. Some people will want super intense ingredients that are akin to getting IcyHot on your junk, but I prefer a milder sensation, so I liked these. My boyfriend couldn’t feel the warm or cold through a condom, and was actually grateful for that, but you might not be.

I do wish the sensation lasted a little longer, though. Both the warmth and the tingling wear off after a minute or two, so I have to reapply if I want more.

The texture of the lube itself is nice and slick, almost oil-like. It fares about as well as you can expect from a water-based lube; with no added moisture, it’ll wear off after two minutes or so.

The warming lube tastes and smells cinnamon-y, the tingling lube tastes and smells like mint, and the original formula has a pleasant but subtle herbal smell (I’m guessing this is from the lavender extract it contains). These lubes taste fine in tiny doses, but I’m not sure I would recommend using the warming or tingling ones if oral sex will be involved; just a drop on my tongue was kind of uncomfortable for me.

OO Lube isn’t my favorite lube, because it doesn’t last very long, but the warming and tingling formulas are nice and I’ll be using them when I want to mix it up. If you’re looking for hot or cold lube with no objectionable ingredients, this is a good choice.

Thanks, OO Lube, for sending me your nifty products to try!

Lube Week, Day 1: Sliquid Sassy Booty

Kate Sloan

It turns out that I have lots of backlogged lube reviews at the moment – so I figured I’ll just get ‘em done all in a row, in an entire week of lube reviews! (I know, not everyone finds lube a fascinating thing to read about. Hopefully you’ll find some value in these, and if not, then hopefully you’ll tune out until next week when I’m back to your normally scheduled programming!)

First up: Sliquid Sassy Booty, sent to me by the lovely and charitable folks at Conscious Contraceptives.

I can tell you, without a shadow of a doubt, that Sliquid is the best of all the popular brands of lube today – at least, if you and/or your partner has a vagina. All of their products are free of glycerine, propylene glycol, parabens, and all the other gross stuff that shouldn’t go anywhere near anyone’s vag.

Sassy Booty is a thick gel lubricant. It has only a few ingredients (purified water, plant cellulose, cyamopsis, potassium sorbate, and citric acid), all of which are vegan and totally okay to put inside you.

It’s completely devoid of all scent and taste, which really surprised me. If you’ve been seeking an utterly tasteless, unscented lube, this is a great option.

As you might have guessed from the name, Sassy Booty is designed for anal play. Personally, I hesitate to recommend any water-based lube for anal use, because they dry up so fast when compared to other kinds of lube – but if you find yourself looking for a lube that can safely be used with a silicone anal toy, Sassy Booty is probably the best you’re gonna find.

Most water-based lube will last about two minutes without any additional lubrication. Sassy Booty, on the other hand, can last up to five or six minutes without adding any moisture. I know that doesn’t sound like much, but it’s practically unheard of for a water-based lube. The only other one I own which can compare is Blossom Organics, which has been my go-to lube for months and months.

The texture is very slick and wet, but not drippy. It leaves a slightly sticky residue once it’s dried down, which is easily taken care of with a wet wipe or a quick wash with soap and water.

Anyone seeking a good water-based lube should definitely consider Sliquid Sassy Booty, even for non-anal purposes. It holds up better than any other water-based lube I’ve tried, and is totally body-safe and non-irritating. Just don’t expect it to work as well as a silicone-based lube for anal play; you’re still going to have to re-lube your butt plug every half hour to stay comfortable if you use Sassy Booty.

Thanks so much to Conscious Contraceptives for sending me this snazzy lube! Did you know that they are philanthropists in the world of contraceptive distribution? Plus their prices are awesome. You should shop there!

Sharing the Sexy #3

Kate Sloan

Hey babies! I’m currently sitting in the window of a Starbucks eyeing up some hot girls in plaid shirts… um, I mean, typing up this post. Here’s some sexy stuff I saw on the internet this week; what have you been up to?

• Mandy “can’t stop hate-masturbating to Paul Ryan.” This piece made me laugh and (to my chagrin) kind of turned me on. Yeah, Paul Ryan is physically attractive (sigh!). It’s kind of like how I find John Mayer insanely sexy, but he’s also kind of a dick. (Did I just compare Paul Ryan to John Mayer? I’m pretty sure that’s extremely insulting to both of them.)

• A woman on Sexxit is upset because of some things her high-functioning autistic husband said to her about their sexual relationship. I found this particularly fascinating because an ex-boyfriend of mine had Asperger’s and we had similar issues, though obviously not as severe (we only dated for a few weeks). Read the comments – there’s some gems, including an insightful reply from another person with Asperger’s. (If you find this stuff as interesting as I do, watch the movie Adam, stat!)

• Dodson and Ross talk about sexual communication and why you shouldn’t lie about what you like. This video makes me feel very lucky to have a boyfriend who listens to my sexual requests and makes ‘em happen.

• Have you ever wanted to see me modelling a silly pinup sailor costume? Well, now you can. (Backstory: Eden didn’t have any new toys I wanted to review this month, so I figured I’d use my monthly free assignment to get myself a Halloween costume. Except it ended up being pretty mediocre, so I might realize my dreams of Halloweening as Jane Lane after all.)

• Luke Young writes with disdain about ways to increase penis size. I have to agree with him that it isn’t worth the risk (and I prefer average-sized dicks anyway), but I’ve heard of several men who’ve had success with jelqing.

• Here’s a round-up of facts and chatter around that idiot Paul Akin and his comments on how, when rape leads to pregnancy, it wasn’t “legitimate rape.” Thanks, Republican upper-class white cis dude, for yet another opinion on my anatomy! I’m glad you feel so entitled to mansplain such things. *rolls eyes*

• Another piece on Akin: Cool Party You’ve Got There, Republicans. Melissa McEwan is my hero.

• A New Zealand TV commercial got away with using the words “vagina” and “discharge.” It saddens me that we live in a world so puritanical that this is considered somehow scandalous, but it’s still a step forward and I’m happy.

• This week on Sexxit, there was a thread about how to have civil conversations about circumcision and intactivism. Maybe it’s just me, but I’m somewhat tired of being expected to have “civil conversations” with people who make unnecessary, life-altering, sexually damaging decisions on behalf of their non-consenting children.

• Don’t know what porn to watch? Here’s a periodic table of feminist porn!

• Rachel Rabbit White writes about what happens when porn star Joanna Angel goes speed-dating.

• My boyfriend talks about what it’s like to date a sex toy reviewer. Apparently it’s pretty cool.

• This “dinner table debate” between Dan Savage (gay sex columnist) and Brian Brown (president of the National Organization for Marriage) is very interesting. Particularly hilarious: Brown’s assertion that “just because you believe something is wrong, it doesn’t mean that you make it illegal” (he was talking about divorce, and apparently didn’t see the irony in this argument) and his usage of the word “marginalize” to describe what same-sex marriage advocates are doing to the church. Ha ha, yeah, us queer folks are so big and strong and we’re always bullying the poor weak church. Right. You go on believing that fable if it makes you feel better about your bigotry.

Review: RodeoH briefs harness

Kate Sloan

The first time I was ever penetrated by a partner, it was with a strap-on. My girlfriend at the time had recently bought a harness-and-dildo kit, a pink and grey beaut that looked mad cute on her. It wasn’t good sex at all – in fact, it was pretty horrible, since this was a first for both of us – but it left me with a feeling of determination: I wanted to have good strap-on sex someday. Not with that same girl (we broke up before we had the chance to get any better at fucking each other), but someone, eventually.

So I was really excited when Conscious Contraceptives offered to send me a RodeoH harness. I’m in a straight relationship now, and my boyfriend has no interest in pegging, but I still felt I needed to have a harness in my collection. Even if it’s not for years, I know I’ll have awesome strap-on sex someday.

RodeoH makes really, really nice harnesses. Compared to the one my girlfriend had way back when, which was super strappy and took a minute or two to get into, my RodeoH is a dream. Imagine a wonderfully comfortable pair of cotton/spandex men’s briefs, except with an O-ring and a little dildo pocket in the front.

The briefs are obscenely cute, in a Shane McCutcheon-y kind of way. The wide, supportive waistband bears the company name and looks hot as fuck sticking out of low-slung jeans. It’s rare that I’m willing to use the phrase “super fly,” but that’s how these briefs make me feel.

The O-ring is sewn into the harness, unlike some other designs which have swappable O-rings. This means that you’re stuck with the one that’s there, but fortunately, it’s got some stretch to it. At rest, it’s 1 ½" in diameter; with some jimmying, I can get my slightly wider Tsunami to fit into it, and it also works just fine with smaller dildos like the Acute (see?), though you’re obviously going to get a bit more flopping around if the dildo you choose is smaller than the O-ring’s diameter. Lengthwise, I’ve had the best success with dildos in the 5" – 5 ½" range; toys longer than that, like my VixSkin Mustang, tend to flop a lot and are difficult to control with this harness. I’m utterly vexed as to how to get this harness to fit toys with big balls, like the Tantus Raptor; I bet it would be possible to squish ‘em through, but I love the RodeoH too much to risk breaking its O-ring. (I don’t even like the Raptor that much, anyway…)

A note on sizing: I ordered my RodeoH based on my waist measurement, stupidly not realizing until later that you really should do it by your hip measurement. So I got a size large when I probably should’ve gone for an XXL. However, amazingly, the harness actually fits me comfortably! The cotton/spandex blend is so stretchy that I can easily wear these briefs all day and only experience very minor muffin-top. RodeoH also recommends sizing down in general because a tighter fit ensures more control when thrusting.

One potential issue some buyers might have with the RodeoH is that it doesn’t allow any access to your pussy (or whatever) underneath the harness. This might be a positive feature for female-bodied genderqueer or trans folks with body dysphoria, who want to fully conceal their junk so only the dildo is visible or feelable – but the average harness user probably wants their genitals to be accessible, at least some of the time. This also means you can’t use double-ended dildos with the RodeoH briefs, though this issue was remedied with their boxer-briefs.

If you want some clit lovin’ while wearing a RodeoH, I recommend slipping a bullet vibe behind your dildo of choice – the pocket holds it nicely, and it stays in place reasonably well on my clit while thrusting.

Speaking of my clit… When I’m wearing the RodeoH, the base of the dildo rests on my pubic mound, not my clit. Again, the stimulation issue is easily resolved by wearing a bullet vibe inside the briefs, but if you want to get clit stim from the dildo and thrusting motion alone, it’s probably not going to happen unless your anatomy is very different from mine.

Overall, though, I love love LOVE this harness. I can’t imagine a better one to be my first. It’s comfy, sexy, low-maintenance, works with all my favorite dildos, and gives me the utmost confidence that I’ll have truly epic strap-on sex one day. It’s also blessedly inexpensive for a harness: only $45! Pick up a RodeoH for your strap-on adventures; it’ll do ya good.

Thanks so much to Conscious Contraceptives for sending me this marvellous harness to try out! Did you know that they donate some of the proceeds of every purchase toward sending contraceptives to underprivileged communities? As if you needed more reasons to buy sex toys!

In Praise of the Uncut Cock

Kate Sloan

I have this very vivid memory from when my boyfriend and I had only recently started dating. I hadn’t seen or touched his penis yet, and I was nervous about it. We were sharing a plate of greasy food at a bowling alley and I told him about how my female friend had given me a “penis lesson,” a little lecture on what to do with a dick when I finally encountered one. I told him that her advice had included the foreskin, since her boyfriend had one – and my man said to me, “Well, I’m uncut too. Just so you know.” And I suddenly felt ten times more nervous than I had before.

I went home that night and started researching intact cocks. Everything I’d learned from scouring the internet, everything I’d picked up from porn, all of it was in reference to dicks sans foreskin – I had to start fresh.

In the process of trying to understand how foreskins fit into handjobs or blowjobs, I learned plenty about the politics of intactivism – like how circumcision is largely based on archaic religious or moral beliefs, and how medically unnecessary circumcisions on babies are ethically wrong because the child doesn’t get a chance to consent. Having grown up in a Jewish home (albeit a very secular one), I didn’t know much about foreskins and certainly had never seen one in person – but the more I learned, the more the idea appealed to me.

After the month or two it took for me to acclimatize to dealing with dick, I knew for sure that I love ‘em uncut. My boyfriend’s foreskin is perfect. It’s soft to the touch, like the way his lips feel when I run my finger across them. I don’t need to use lube when I’m jerking him off, because his foreskin makes it smooth regardless. His glans is kept safe all day so it remains pink and moist, as it should.

I think what I like most about his being uncut is that it makes his dick act like my clit. We’re both way too sensitive to be touched without the barrier of the foreskin or clitoral hood in the way. We both get off on indirect stimulation. This similarity made it much easier for me to learn how to please him. And in return, I think his sensitivity has given him a better understanding of how my junk works.

I recently got into a debate with my friend, who’s dating a Jewish guy, about routine infant circumcision. She argued that some guys are grateful that their parents circumcised them at birth. Okay, yeah, I’m sure that’s true. But the bottom line is, I cannot fathom making an irreparable change to someone’s body when they’re unable to consent, unless it’s strictly medically necessary to do so. And in the vast majority of cases, it’s not. So if I ever have a baby boy, there’s no question in my mind that I’ll leave him intact – for his health, for his sexual enjoyment, and for the pure moral standpoint that what he does with his body is up to him, not me.

Bonus reading: Check out the blog Uncutting, which is rife with information about intactivism, foreskin restoration, and the cruel pointlessness of routine infant circumcision.

Note: No pro-circumcision tirades in the comment section, please. I’ve heard it all before and I still disagree. Also, keep in mind that this post is intended as a celebration of underappreciated intact penises and not an admonishment of cut ones, so don’t take this as an attack on your cut cock – it’s not!