Sex Toy Reviews

Review: Romulus Shop Olympia 10-Speed Wand

Kate Sloan

Oh god. I’m the wand girl now, aren’t I.

This was a fear I professed to my spouse while I was working on my miniseries about the Magic Wand, Making Magic. Some actors worry about getting typecast after a well-reviewed turn as a nerd or a cad; similarly, I was worried about becoming known forever as that gal who loves wand vibes.

But now, having reflected on it more, I kinda think: it’s fine. There are worse legacies I could have.

And I’m not just saying that because the wand girl gets sent a lot of wands, I swear.

 

What is the Romulus Shop Olympia 10-Speed Wand?

Like many sex toy stores I love, Romulus Shop carries a mix of classic, well-known shapes, and wild, out-there designs. Ever wanted to have your G-spot tapped while your clit is getting sucked? They’ve got a toy for that. How about a hairjob from Medusa? They’ve got a toy for that. Glass anal beads? Yep, they’ve got those, too. (I haven’t tried them and can’t personally attest to whether they’re good, but… whoa. Glass anal beads?!?)

However, in this case, I’m reviewing a tamer product: a humble wand. You know ’em, you love ’em; they’re the original muscle-massager-turned-orgasm-implement, and they tend to offer some of the strongest vibrations around. The Olympia is the most classic wand that Romulus Shop carries.

Bendy neck

Things I like about the Olympia Wand

  • To me, the most impressive thing about this wand – especially for its low price point – is that each of its 10 vibration modes has 5 different intensity settings. Usually, on cheap vibrators, you’re lucky if you get 3 different steady vibration intensities plus a handful of patterns – but this wand gives you a steady vibration mode + 9 pattern modes, all of which have 5 different intensity levels to choose from. This gives each pattern way more versatility and makes it likelier for me to actually use patterns, because (for example) I can start with a low, rumbling pulse and work my way up to a high-powered pulse, without needing to interrupt the flow by cycling through other patterns.
  • The lowest intensity has a nice vibration quality; I’d say it’s buzzy but leaning rumbly, and I find that it works well for building arousal. However, as I’ll describe later, I’m less thrilled with the buzziness of the higher intensities. But in terms of sheer power (i.e. vibration strength, rather than vibration quality/pitch), I’d say this one is pretty middle-of-the-road for a wand – decently strong but not wildly so.
  • The wand’s neck is very bendable in all directions, and the vibrations don’t weaken or cut out when the neck gets bent in this way, in my experience (although I’m sure, as with all wands, there is an amount of pressure that would eventually break it).
  • It’s pretty light, compared to other wands of its size. It feels like it’s maybe half the weight of the Magic Wand Rechargeable, if not lighter. There was a time when I would’ve considered this a drawback, since lighter toys can feel insubstantial and low-quality – but now that I live with chronic pain and strength issues in my hands/arms (among other places), it’s actually helpful for me when a toy doesn’t weigh much, because it means I can hold it for longer without getting tired, and can easily maneuver it to different spots around my vulva.
  • At first, I was concerned to see that the toy didn’t come with instructions – but its controls are actually fairly simple. You hold down the power button to turn the toy on or off, and then short-press that same button to cycle through vibration modes. The plus and minus buttons control the vibration intensity.
  • It’s waterproof! Yay! That’s unusual for a full-size wand like this one. Always nice to be able to use a toy in the shower or bath, or even just to be able to wash it in the sink without worrying you’ll ruin it.
  • At the time that I’m writing this, it’s on sale for $31.90 USD (or $46 CAD), which is pretty damn good for a full-size, rechargeable wand vibrator made of non-porous, body-safe materials.
Pictured with some wands you may have heard of

Things I don’t like about the Olympia Wand

  • The biggest problem with this toy is the vibration quality. I genuinely like the lowest of the 5 intensity levels, as I mentioned above, but levels 2 through 5 get progressively buzzier, resulting (for me) in the temporary clitoral desensitization that happens with high-pitched vibrations like these. I can’t get off with buzzy vibes like this unless I either physically move the toy in circles against me the whole time, or rush through the process so I come before most of the desensitization sets in.
  • It’s loud, even for a wand. My Apple Watch measured it at 71 decibels, while the Magic Wand Rechargeable tops out at about 50. With the Olympia, someone standing outside my bedroom door would likely be able to tell I was using a vibrator… although I will say that it gets a bit quieter when it’s pressed against my body and/or used under blankets.
  • Personal pet peeve: when you first turn it on, it always starts at the 3rd intensity level out of 5 – so if, like me, you prefer to work your way up from the lowest speed, you’ll have to manually turn it down every time you turn it on.

Final thoughts

The buzziness and loudness of this wand make it less than ideal for me, so the main reason I’d recommend it to someone is if price was a major factor for them. (It’s a very valid factor!)

So, here are some questions to ask yourself. Are you looking for a super budget-friendly wand? Do you enjoy, or just not particularly mind, buzzy/high-pitched vibrations? Are you okay with your toy being somewhat loud? If you said yes to all three, then I think the Romulus Shop Olympia Wand is worth considering. A wand vibe can be a versatile addition to just about anyone’s toy collection, because of all the many ways it can be used solo or with a partner, and I love that there are body-safe options available under $40, like the Olympia, so that strong vibrations are financially accessible to more people. This wand also has the benefits of being waterproof and very light and easy to wield.

I guess I am the wand girl, because I want everyone to be able to afford a wand if they want one. And to that end, I’m glad the Olympia exists.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write an honest and fair review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Solina Mega L ultra-realistic dildo

Kate Sloan

Have you ever eaten a piece of fruit so juicy, so ripe, and so delicious, it made you feel grateful that fruits exist at all, and that you’re alive to experience them?

Yeah, that’s how the Solina Mega L dildo makes me feel about dicks. Let’s discuss.

 

Dual-density silicone, ultra-realism, & size

For at least as long as I’ve been in this biz, dual-density silicone has been the gold standard for realism in dildos. For those unfamiliar, “dual-density” refers to the two different hardnesses of silicone used in these toys: their core is made of firm silicone, while the outer layer is made of squishier silicone. As a result, dual-density silicone dildos feel much more like actual human penises than single-density ones do – and you get the pounding power of a firmer silicone, sheathed in some comfortable cushioning, for an all-around satisfying sensation.

Plenty of companies make dual-density silicone toys these days, like Tantus, Vixen Creations, and Uberrime. By comparison, Solina is a relatively new arrival to the scene, and they’re knocking it out of the park, as you’ll see below.

On the topic of size: I requested the large, which (contrary to its name) is actually the smallest Solina. It has 6.75″ of insertable length and a max diameter of 1.5″. For me personally, this is a great size to use on an average day, as I don’t need to warm up much to take it, but it feels filling enough and can even hit my A-spot (more on that below). The XL size is 7.6″ x 1.8″, while the XXL size is 8.25″ x 2″.

Things I like about the Solina Mega L

  • Here’s the headline: this is one of the most realistic-looking and realistic-feeling dildos I’ve ever tried. It features ridges, veins, and a subtly beautiful color ombré that remind me of some of my favorite cocks, and it’s just dreamy. Its verisimilitude lends it well to pairing with various fantasies (I jerked off to the thought of this dildo being an advanced humanoid sex robot’s dick just this morning, in fact!), and it could also be a gender-affirming pick for some transmasculine people to strap on.
  • Unlike some other dual-density toys I’ve tried, this toy’s silicone is hardly draggy at all, but instead is smooth and matte. This allows it to glide comfortably in and out when properly lubed (with water-based lube), and I’ve found that I can even skip lube with this dildo if I’m already wet enough, which is rare with silicone.
  • Truly one of the best things about the Solina Mega L is that it only costs FORTY DOLLARS! For a hyper-realistic, body-safe, dual-density silicone dildo! If you’re not clued into typical sex toy pricing, just trust me: those exclamation points are warranted. I’d generally expect a dildo of this quality to run you $80 to $130, so seeing it priced at $40 makes my heart happy, as someone who wants good sex toys to be accessible to anyone who wants them. The XL and XXL are pricier, at $60 and $70 respectively, but that’s still less than I would expect for toys of this caliber.
  • This toy has a flared base that makes it anal-safe – yay! Additionally, it’s compatible with strap-ons and (some) fucking machines, and it has a suction cup, so you can attach it to a hard, flat surface, like a floor or a shower wall, for hands-free usage. I love how versatile this dildo was designed to be.
  • This is a FANTASTIC blowjob dildo, if you’re into that – 10/10, no notes. The smoothness and squishiness of the silicone make it orally pleasing, and the dimensions don’t hurt my jaw. Maybe I should practice my deepthroating skills with this thing, come to think of it…

Things I don’t like about the Solina Mega L

  • My main struggle when using this toy is that, like some people I’ve dated, it’s a bit too straight for me (*rimshot*). It can definitely reach and stroke my G-spot and A-spot, as mentioned above, but would do so better if it had a slight curve. As is, I have to manually angle it pretty intensely to get it to hit those spots (by tilting the base of the toy downward, toward my butt), and sometimes that’s hard for my hands/arms to sustain.
  • As of yet, it doesn’t seem to be available in any other skin tones beyond the light-ish one seen here. I hope that that changes in the future, especially since realistic dildos can be gender-affirming for many folks when worn in a strap-on or similar, and in situations like that, it’s (obviously) preferable if your dildo matches the rest of your body. (Edited to add: My friends at Peepshow Toys told me that Solina dildos should be available in darker skin tones by early 2025, yayyy!)
Close-up on veiny texture

Final thoughts

I wish the Solina Mega L had been around when I first started giving sex advice, because people were always asking for budget-friendly dildo recommendations, and back then it was rare to see a decently-designed, body-safe dildo for under $50. But there are a lot more financially accessible options available now, like the Solina toys, and I’m thrilled about that.

With the Solina Mega L, for just $40, you get a mega-realistic dildo that looks gorgeous and works well in a broad variety of situations, from solo sex to strap-on sex to hands-free shower shenanigans. I think that’s a pretty fucking good deal!

 

This post was not sponsored. Thanks to my pals at Peepshow Toys for sending me this toy to try! As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Funzze Finger Vibe (& why accessible sex toys are great)

Kate Sloan

More companies should make sex toys that people with disabilities can use, because accessible sex toys are just better – and not only for folks with disabilities, but for everyone. Let me explain.

My spouse once gave a talk about accessibility in software, in which she described the curb cut effect: the phenomenon where features developed to be disability-friendly will end up benefiting a much larger population, too. Think, for example, of how an automatic sliding door can improve accessibility for people who use wheelchairs or mobility scooters, while at the same time, making it easier for able-bodied people to walk through the door if they’re, say, carrying two armloads of groceries, or wheeling their child in a stroller.

By that same token, I’m strongly in favor of more sex toy companies developing products that are accessible to all kinds of people, because we all benefit from those types of design choices, sometimes even in unexpected ways. Let’s talk about one such case, the Funzze Finger Vibe.

What is the Funzze Finger Vibe, and why is its accessible design potentially beneficial for everyone?

Funzze’s got quite a wide catalog of products, but the Finger Vibe caught my eye immediately, because it looked like it would be comfortable for me to hold, even on days when my hands are aching from fibromyalgia. It’s shaped like a fairly standard clitoral vibe, except that it has two little “wings” on the back which allow you to hold the toy between two fingers easily, without needing to apply much pressure to keep the vibe anchored in your hand. This could make this toy potentially much easier to use than standard clit vibes for people who struggle with muscle strength/mobility issues and/or chronic pain in their hands, myself included.

That being said, even if you’re able-bodied and able-handed(!), you can still find value in toys like these. Anyone seeking an “unobtrusive” toy, a toy that lets you forget you’re even using a toy, might consider getting a finger vibe – because once you’re accustomed to how the toy feels in your hand, it can (sometimes) feel like you’re just touching your partner (or yourself) the way you normally would, but with some vibration magically infused into your touch. It can be a much more intuitive and “natural”-feeling way of working some vibration into the mix.

But to sum up the actual specs: the Finger Vibe is a rechargeable, silicone and ABS plastic vibrator with 9 vibration settings.

Things I like about this toy

  • First of all, I feel like I need to mention upfront that it costs THIRTY DOLLARS. That’s a steal for a decent and versatile rechargeable vibe, and I have to keep its price point in mind when assessing it.
  • I really like the design of it, on both visual and tactile levels, from the stylized silicone “wings” that remind me of butterflies, to the shiny plastic heart panel just below them, to the way the toy feels in my hand. It’s comfortable, cute, and cool. My hand never gets tired from holding onto it, and it’s easy on the eyes, too. The wings have enough flexibility that they should be able to fit a broad range of finger sizes, and they’re designed in such a way that I almost never lose my grip on the toy.
  • Specifically, I really like the contoured shape of the part that goes on your clit (or whatever other pinpointed body part you’re aiming this toy at). It’s well-shaped for the purpose and allows me to hit my clit without needing to hold my labia out of the way, as some flatter vibes require.
  • Crucially, the button is placed in a location that actually makes sense. I’ve previously tried a vibe very similar to this one, which had a button in a hard-to-reach location that required me to use my other hand to press it, every single time. With this one, the button is located comfortably within reach of my middle fingertip when I’m holding the toy, but it’s tucked out of the way just enough that I never hit it by accident.
  • It’s waterproof, which is always great. I could see this toy being a fun addition to shower sex, for people who are into that, because the grippy silicone wings would help it stay in place between your fingers. (Funzze’s website describes this toy as giving you “easy, no-slip control, even when wet and frantic.” Now that’s good copy, baby!)

Things I don’t like about this toy

  • The biggest issue, unfortunately, is the motor. It’s buzzy, i.e. the vibrations are higher-pitched and more surface-level than I’d prefer, so I end up feeling a bit numb after a minute or two, and the orgasms are never as satisfying as they would otherwise be. However, stroking the vibe up and down or in circles, as if it were a vibrating fingertip (which is probably the intended way to use it), mitigates these effects to some extent – and I do have to point out here again that this toy costs thirty dollars, so I understand why the motor’s not exactly heavy-duty.
  • While there are 9 vibration settings, only the first 3 of them are steady vibration, and the jumps between them are jarringly wide; the next 6 are patterns, many of which are distractingly erratic. You have to cycle through all 9 settings to get back to the first one, a personal pet peeve of mine.
  • Despite the button’s good placement, I sometimes find it too difficult to press with one finger, which can negate some of the toy’s accessibility at times.
  • It’s a little on the loud side, as buzzy vibrators tend to be, especially on its highest setting.

 

Final thoughts

If they put a deep, rumbly motor in the Funzze Finger Vibe, it would earn an immediate upgrade to the top drawer of my nightstand, and would probably stay there for a very long time. The design of this toy is sleek and thoughtful, and I find it comfortable to use most of the time, which I can’t say for a lot of vibrators.

For all its sexy unobtrusiveness in size, shape, and ergonomics, though, its buzzy motor and notable noise level put a bit of a damper on things.

But for $30, I think the Finger Vibe is a fair deal, and I always love to see more companies making sex toys that are accessible to a wide range of people – accessible not only in terms of disabilities, but also in terms of finances. And to that end, this is a highly heartening little vibrator that I think could add some buzzy pizzazz into a lot of people’s sex lives, without breaking the bank – or their fingers.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Mr. Hankey’s Toys “Perfect Penis”

Kate Sloan

Look, if you name your dildo the “Perfect Penis,” I’m gonna be curious about it.

I dig realistic dildos, so I was already intrigued by this one from the name and picture alone. But then I read this, in the product description on the Mr. Hankey’s website (emphasis mine):

The dimensions of our Perfect Penis dildo are tailored using Artificial Intelligence, a unique approach to dildo design in the market. Our A.I.-driven process considers a vast array of studies on preferred penis size, leading to a selection of dildos in various sizes with the ideal balance of length and width — a distinguishing feature that positions us as a cutting-edge leader in realistic dildo manufacturing.

I was confused about this at first, because every study I’ve ever read on penis size preference has indicated that average-ish dimensions tend to be most people’s ideal (which makes sense), and this toy has pretty comically large dimensions by contrast, as is par for the course with Mr. Hankey’s. So I emailed them for clarification, and my contact at the company told me that the small size of the Perfect Penis (6.5″ insertable length, diameter ranging from 1.4″ to 1.6″) was designed based on A.I.-compiled statistical averages of preferred penis dimensions from around the world, and the larger sizes of this toy are scaled-up versions of that.

What with A.I. being such a hot-button issue right now, this seemed like a topically relevant dildo to review 😂 Let’s see whether it lives up to its name…

Customization options & what I chose

The Perfect Penis comes in 4 different sizes, ranging from S to XXL. I already own plenty of realistic dildos in what one might call a “reasonable” size range, so I wanted to go a little “unreasonable” with this one, at least for my own orifices. I went with the medium size, which has an insertable length of 8″ and a diameter ranging from 2″ to 2.25″.

There are 4 different firmness options for this toy, and I decided on the “medium firm” one, because I wanted it to feel comparable to an actual erect dick.

There are also a whopping 25 different color options (including a few skin tones and a bunch of zanier shades), and I chose silver.

There’s also the option to get a Vac-U-Lock-compatible hole in the bottom of the toy, incase you want to use it with fucking machines, etc. that use the Vac-U-Lock system. I omitted that feature on mine because I don’t anticipate using it that way.

Gotta love a balls close-up

Things I like about this toy

  • I was nervous about the size at first, but with proper warm-up, I can handle it and it feels wonderful. I don’t really consider myself a size queen per se – my favorite dildos are spread far and wide across the size spectrum – but I do sometimes crave being filled up, or feel like fantasizing about archetypal big-dicked alpha bros or whatever, and having a truly massive dildo in my collection for those occasions is great. As with many flesh-and-blood dicks, this one is slightly slimmer at the tip than along the rest of the shaft, which makes insertion somewhat easier.
  • The medium firmness is A++. I generally prefer dual-density silicone for realistic dildos, since with those, you get the satisfyingly firm core and the comfortably squishy exterior, but this one is single-density and I think the medium firmness strikes a good balance. It can be a little uncomfortable as my vag stretches open upon first inserting it, but it allows for gratifyingly hard pounding when I’m warmed up enough for that, and having something hard to squeeze around makes my orgasms more intense.
  • Some dicks have a coronal ridge that makes you truly appreciate the genius of nature for designing the coronal ridge at all, and this dildo makes me feel that way too. The ridge is just dreamy, especially in this medium firmness and when doused in lube. It strokes across my whole front vaginal wall and can also provide more targeted G-spot stimulation if I aim it there. (As for A-spot stimulation, this dildo is less adept at that because it’s simply too thick to snuggle up in there, but it can pound that general area, which – given its many other pleasurable features – is good enough for me.)
  • The surface texture all along the toy is hyper-realistic, and stimulating without being overstimulating. If you like super veiny/textured dildos, this one might miss the mark for you because its texture is relatively subtle, but I like that it provides a tiny bit of “drag” against my vaginal walls without being uncomfortable.
  • I love the balls! They’re not just cute; they’re practical, too. This toy’s hefty base makes it much easier to use hands-free, since I can wedge the base of the dildo between my body and the bed and just rock against it while I use a clitoral vibe.
  • Undoubtedly the silliest thing on this list: For months, I have kept this dildo on my desk and used it daily as a stand for my phone. I set the phone upright on the balls and lean it against the shaft. This allows me to see when any texts come in, etc., without the phone constantly falling over from the vibration of every alert, which was an issue I previously had. It can also function as a stand for my iPad mini (see below), e-readers and books, and so on, which is genuinely useful for me as someone who’s frequently referring to various materials when writing. I’m seriously going to keep this toy on my desk and continue using it this way (when I’m not using it, y’know, the other way…) because it’s the perfect addition to a sex writer’s setup 😂

Things I don’t like about this toy

  • Almost anything I could write here would just be a matter of personal preference – it might be too big for some users, too firm, too realistic, etc.; you can decide for yourself if it sounds like it’d be up your alley (so to speak). The only more substantive drawback worth mentioning, IMO, is that this is quite heavy for a silicone dildo, as you might expect from looking at it, and so it’s not always easy for me to thrust it with my sore hands/arms. But, as mentioned, it can be used more-or-less hands-free, so that’s not too much of an issue.
  • Oh yeah, and it might be too heavy to comfortably use in a strap-on. You could give it a shot – the company suggests a 2.5″ O-ring – but I think the balls would become an issue.
Face for scale!

Final thoughts

As an advocate for body-positivity, I try not to use phrases like “perfect penis,” myself – not only because they can make people feel bad about their bodies for not living up to whatever I declare as “perfection,” but also because what is “perfect” for me will not be perfect for you, and vice-versa. Mr. Hankey’s says this right on the product page:

Understandably, some won’t find this to be their Perfect Penis, and if you are this person, please browse our website, as there is bound to be a Perfect Penis for everyone in our shop.

That being said, the Mr. Hankey’s Toys Perfect Penis is certainly a beautiful cock, one that would look equally at home on an ancient Greek erotic statue as it would swinging between the legs of a modern-day porn star. It feels fantastic, too, like an over-the-top caricature of penile penetration. Do I always want sensations that intense? Fuck no. Do I want ’em real bad when I do indeed want ’em? Fuck yeah. And the Perfect Penis can deliver.

This is the third Mr. Hankey’s toy I’ve reviewed over the past few months (check out my previous reviews of the Captain’s Hook and Oni) and I’ve been super impressed with all of them. They are high-quality, beautifully designed, and exquisitely customizable. They have a dildo for pretty much any fantasy you can dream up, from getting railed by a sex robot to riding a banana. It’s lovely to see a company delighting in creating such beautiful, pleasurable toys. They may not be “perfect,” but each one is somebody’s version of perfect, and that’s really the important thing.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Mr. Hankey’s Toys Oni

Kate Sloan
(Soda can for scale)

Realistic dildos are great, but I’ve tested a lot of them, and, well… they’re all dicks, so even with all the many variations in size, shape, texture, and tone, they get a little samey after a while.

So I’m sure you can understand why my interest was piqued by the ultra-textured, wildly fantastical Oni dildo by Mr. Hankey’s Toys. Let’s talk about it.

 

What is the Oni, & how can it be customized?

The Oni feels conceptually similar to those hentai-inspired tentacle dildos that are so popular: it’s vaguely tentacle-shaped and has a ton of texture all along its shaft. But that’s where the similarities end: there’s no actual aquatic imagery in this dildo’s design. Mr. Hankey’s describes it as an “ogre-like demon” dildo, featuring a “demon’s face [that] lick[s] you from the inside.”

As is standard for toys from Mr. Hankey’s, this one can be customized to your heart’s content: you get 4 size options, 4 firmness options, 25 color options, and you can indicate whether you want there to be a Vac-U-Loc-compatible hole in the base of the dildo or not.

For my Oni, I went with the small size, 75% soft firmness, metallic green color, and no Vac-U-hole. In classic Mr. Hankey’s fashion, even this “small” Oni is quite hefty: it’s got 7.1″ of insertable length, and its diameter starts at 1.3″ near the head and widens to 1.9″ as you get closer to the base.

Front & back of the Oni’s shaft

A caveat on texture & firmness

I specifically chose the “75% soft” firmness for this toy because it’s so intensely textured. Firmer textured dildos can feel scrapey, annoying, and even painful – but the softness of this one gives its texture some cushion, so that my vaginal walls feel like they’re being stroked and massaged, not scraped. Generally I’d recommend that you, too, go for one of the softer options if you end up getting your own Oni – I think most vaginas and butts would prefer this particular toy soft and squishy.

That being said, the trade-off is that softer toys are much less capable of applying targeted pressure to erogenous zones like the G-spot, A-spot, or prostate. Many people prefer a firmer touch on these spots because they are somewhat buried in the vaginal or anal wall, so they tend to respond better to pressure than gentle surface-level touch.

So it really comes down to whether you want to hit specific spots (in which case, firmer is better), or just experience a diffuse, textured sensation along your entire vaginal/anal wall with each thrust (in which case, softer is better). I’m a person who generally prefers to target specific spots with firm pressure, so a squishy, textured dildo like the Oni is more of an occasional craving for me, not the bread and butter of my dildo rotation. But that’s just me.

 

Things I like about this toy

  • The design, it must be said, is intricate and gorgeous. The front bears the aforementioned demon face, the back looks like something out of a monster-of-the-week comic, and the tip resembles a regular penis head, but stylized and elongated. It really is a work of art.
  • I love that the tip is so tapered, for two reasons: it makes this toy much easier to insert, despite its challenging texture, and it can also nudge up into my A-spot fairly easily. I also love that it’s shaped vaguely like an actual dick head, as this combines well with a lot of my fantasies when I’m using a dildo.
  • The curve seems to perfectly ensure that the entire front of the shaft rubs against my entire vaginal wall on every stroke. I don’t think it holds its shape very well once it’s inside me, because of the softness of the silicone, but it nonetheless keeps the toy mercilessly in contact with my G-spot and the surrounding area.
  • The texture is enjoyable – when I’m properly warmed up for it.  This is not the type of dildo I can rush into using, even with lube (which it requires a lot of). If I go too fast, my vaginal walls get irritated – but if I take the time to make sure I’m really turned on before inserting it, the texture feels decadent, maximalist. It doesn’t give me the same breathless gut-punch orgasms as toys that press firmly into my internal spots, but the soft texture allows for a thrilling slow-build that feels great along the way, even if the orgasm itself isn’t as explosive.
  • The squishiness is fun to squeeze around, like a vaginal stress ball.
  • The base is chunky and easy to grip onto and thrust with. I also like that a part of it juts out in such a way that you can mash it against your clit when you thrust extra deep. Normally I pair dildos with a clitoral vibrator so I can get off, but sometimes it’s nice to tease myself first by grinding against the base of the dildo.

Things I don’t like about this toy

  • As mentioned, the texture can be a bit much if I’m not sufficiently turned on and/or not using enough lube. And you will go through a fair amount of lube when using this thing, at least if you want to use it comfortably.
  • As the company points out themselves on their product page, the design of this dildo makes it prone to tipping over when stood upright on its base, which could be annoying if you tend to ride your dildos.
  • Commonly for super-textured dildos, this one is a bit trickier to clean than smooth toys, sometimes requiring a scrub brush (like an old toothbrush) to get into all the little seams and crannies. But if you like texture then it’ll be worth it.

 

Final thoughts

Mr. Hankey’s Toys allowed me to pick 3 different dildos (check out my Captain’s Hook review!), and the Oni was really the wildcard of my selections, the one that’s the biggest departure from my typical taste in dildos. It’s squishy, textured, and fantastical, while most of my faves are firm, smooth, and simple.

But the design of the Oni is both beautiful and ingenious; its curve makes its texture feel more dynamic and even more stimulating than it would be on its own. It massages my entire vagina from the inside, in a way that I haven’t often experienced before.

So, shout-out to Mr. Hankey’s for creating the elegant Oni. It’s funny how a demonic dildo can feel so heavenly.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.