Sex Toy Reviews

Review: Drywell Lolita G-Spot Vibrator

Kate Sloan

I must admit, I was pretty amused when I saw there was a sex toy company called Drywell. “What are these,” I wondered, “vibrators for Ben Shapiro?!”

The company wanted me to review one of their toys and let me take my pick, so I selected a silicone rechargeable G-spot vibrator known as the Lolita. I liked its vaguely shell-like, feminine aesthetic, and figured a penetrative vibe is usually a safe bet when choosing a toy I’m not sure I’ll enjoy, because if one of my erogenous zones doesn’t like it then another one might instead.

Well, I was in for a surprise – because I actually do like this vibe. Like, way more than I was expecting. Well-played, Drywell!

The main thing that sets the Lolita apart from other G-spot vibrators of its ilk is that it’s bendable, like the We-Vibe Nova 2 which I also reviewed recently. While I doubt this will become a standard feature of penetrative toys any time soon, I love that I’m seeing it pop up more and more, because a customizable toy is just… a better toy (other factors notwithstanding). We don’t all want the same kinds of stimulation, and the bendability of this vibrator means I’m just as likely to enjoy it, with my sensitive princess of a G-spot, as someone who likes theirs pressed hard and pounded. The Lolita can have almost no curve at all, or it can be curled up into a fairly tight C-shape, or anywhere in between, as per your preference – incredible. There is some scrunching of the silicone casing that happens when you bend it past about 90°, though, which I’d imagine could cause some wear and tear after prolonged use in that position. Conveniently, bending the vibe also helps it anchor in place better when it’s inserted, so I can even use this toy hands-free when I don’t feel like thrusting it.

Let’s talk about the vibrations. This vibe only has one intensity level, which I was prepared to yell and scream about in my review once I learned about it. But here’s the thing… On top of its one steady speed, the Lolita also has 5 patterns, and they make all the difference. I can’t even pick a favorite, and for once it’s not because I hate all of the patterns equally. “Foreplay Mode” is short, fast pulses of vibration; “Touch Mode” is longer pulses that feel slightly like the rhythmic strokes of a partner’s fingers against my G-spot; “Joyful Mode” is also short, fast pulses but more staccato and thus more impactful and stimulating; “Passionate Mode” is short pulses that vary slightly in intensity over time to create a feeling of peaks and valleys; and finally, there’s “Orgasm Mode,” the least aptly-named pattern of the bunch, which starts low and builds up erratically to a high speed over about 2-3 seconds before going back to low.

Most sex toy designers don’t seem to understand what vibration patterns are for. While I’m sure there are people who enjoy patterns with lots of pauses in between their buzzes, or patterns peppered with randomness to keep users on their toes, for the most part I think what vibration patterns do best is create the illusion of movement. This is especially true for G-spot vibrators, since that internal zone has different types of nerves than, say, a clitoris, and thus (in my experience) can more easily interpret the bzz-bzz-bzz of a vibration pattern as feeling more like the tap-tap-tap of a finger or even a thrusting cock as it slides on by. These Drywell patterns seem designed with that in mind, particularly since they lack significant pauses between any of the buzzes, so there’s constant stimulation of some kind no matter what mode you’re on. These are the type of patterns that make me, a pattern-hater, into a pattern-tolerator or even a pattern-adorer.

These patterns (jeez, how many times am I gonna say that word in this review?!) also drastically improve what would otherwise be the toy’s biggest problem: its motor. The Lolita’s vibrations are strong – an important quality in a toy designed to stimulate a structure buried in the vaginal wall, i.e. the G-spot – but they lean fairly buzzy. In fact, if I’m holding the vibe while using it clitorally, often my hand will start to feel numb and itchy within a matter of seconds. But this hand-numbing effect is mitigated significantly once the toy is inside me, where it’s designed to go – and so is the annoyance of the vibrations on my erogenous zones. Any time my G-spot starts to feel a bit desensitized from all the buzzing, I can just switch to a different pattern and it’ll feel good again. Even when the surface skin of my vagina gets pretty overstimulated, the deeper tissue can still register the tapping, thumping, and pulsing of the patterns – in fact, it almost feels more like fingerfucking or thrusting when I get to this stage, even if the vibe remains stationary. It’s really wonderful and unique.

Image via Drywell

Speaking of thrusting, you can definitely do that with this toy. It’s actually designed really thoughtfully with that usage in mind, so it would seem. Once you’ve adjusted the shaft to your ideal angle – which, by the way, might change as your G-spot gets more turned on – you can grab the handle, which has handy silicone grips on either side for this purpose, and press against the hard plastic panel on the back of it to give you leverage while you thrust. As someone who struggles to move toys in and out on bad pain days (especially toys made of silicone, one of the draggiest materials even with lube), I appreciate these little touches a lot.

That good design also extends to the toy’s control panel. It has two buttons: one turns the toy on, and the other cycles through the patterns. But crucially, the power button also functions as a “back to the previous pattern” button when the toy is in use, which is fucking fantastic. It is annoying as hell to have to scroll through every single pattern to get back to the one you liked, especially in the throes of arousal, so I really appreciate being able to navigate between the settings easily and quickly.

My G-spot has to be very warmed up to enjoy this toy, but once it’s in the mood for intense stimulation, boy, can the Lolita deliver. The combo of vibration patterns + thrusting + the subtle dragging/scraping of the toy’s ridged head against my vaginal wall is kinda divine. One downside of how intense the Lolita is: I can’t pair it with clitoral vibrators that are at all subtle, like the Eroscillator, because their sensations will just get drowned out by the high-octane buzzing and throbbing going on in my vag. Something with a lot of power and a bit of buzz, like the Magic Wand, makes a much better companion for the Lolita.

Lest you think I like everything about this toy, here’s the paragraph my journalism-school professors would call “the fly in the ointment”… First off, the Lolita is loud, though the noise level dies down significantly when it’s in my vag. Secondly, the buttons of mine light up in erratic, seemingly patternless flashes when the toy is on, which doesn’t bug me all that much but could be distracting or even epilepsy-triggering for some folks. Thirdly, the ridges all up and down the toy’s insertable portion are hell to clean, and require some kind of scrub brush. And finally, I have to imagine this toy isn’t terribly high-quality due to the price (a shockingly low $22 USD or $36 CAD), so I wouldn’t be surprised if it doesn’t last me very long; that said, it does feel much more durable in my hands than a lot of other vibes I’ve tested in this price range.

I wouldn’t recommend this vibe for prostate play, even though it would likely feel awesome on a prostate, because the base is not at all flared so it wouldn’t be safe to insert anally. Drywell doesn’t really make anything anal-safe, although they do have this self-lubricating massage wand (???) that is marked “for male” and that is therefore probably designed to do something to dicks and/or butts. I dunno, your guess is as good as mine.

All in all, I continue to be surprised by how much I like this vibrator. I’m not the biggest fan of G-spot vibration in general, but when I’m craving it occasionally, I’d much rather reach for the Drywell Lolita than the Lelo Mona or even the We-Vibe Rave because of the bendability, stellar patterns, and ease of use. (Sorry, We-Vibe, but I don’t always want to smear lube on my phone screen trying to change my vibe’s settings mid-wank.) It’s also way cheaper than those other toys, which can sell for $100+ each. When I need to stuff my vagina with vibrations to get enough over-the-top G-spot stimulation for a killer blended orgasm, the Lolita’s my gal.

Y’all, I can’t believe a toy made by a company called Drywell made me squirt. What a world we live in.

 

This post was sponsored, meaning that Drywell (whose products you can buy in various places online) paid me to write a fair and honest review of their product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own. Yes, I really do actually like this vibe!

Review: We-Vibe Nova 2

Kate Sloan

God, I love We-Vibe. I really, really do. I love We-Vibe so much that, during BOTH of the stints I worked in sex toy retail, my managers noted, “You really like We-Vibe, huh?”

I mean, of course I do. As a company, it’s leaps and bounds ahead of the toymakers those managers were more hyped about (Crave, Jimmyjane, and Lelo, perhaps because of higher profit margins or more luxurious marketing). Its toys are truly wonderful and genuinely innovative, unlike those of companies whose business model hinges on stealing other people’s ideas. In fact, We-Vibe’s toy designs are so good that they’re often the ones being stolen. In a perplexing example of “patent trolling,” Lelo infamously bought a preexisting vibrator charging patent and then sued We-Vibe for supposedly infringing on the copyright of this technology that Lelo didn’t even invent. We-Vibe speculates this was an act of retaliation for the lawsuit they filed against Lelo when Lelo started making couples’ vibes that copycatted the inventive C-shaped design We-Vibe famously pioneered. Classy move, Lelo. 🙄

Anyway, I don’t just love We-Vibe because they make other toy designers jealous. I love them because their toys are consistently fantastic. In the rare case where they mess up and make something people widely dislike – or even something with widely disliked features or elements – they’re not afraid to go back to the drawing board and crank out a new version.

The vibrator I’m reviewing today is the Nova 2, an update on a toy that was actually pretty broadly adored. The original Nova was a groundbreaking addition to the dual-stimulation (a.k.a. “rabbit”) vibe category, in that you could thrust it in and out without the flexible clitoral arm losing contact with your clit. This meant that you could have the best of both worlds: the dynamic G-spot stimulation you’d typically only get if you were thrusting a dildo inside you, and the consistent clitoral stimulation you’d normally only get from holding a vibrator on your clit. Total game-changer.

The Nova 2 kept all the things the original Nova did well, and added a few small touches that somehow make it an even better vibe. Chief among them is that the toy’s internal arm is now poseable, so you can bend it into a more pronounced curve if you want more intense G-spot stimulation, or straighten it out if you want it to be able to get deeper inside you. The angle of the internal arm will also affect how the external arm feels: more curved = less space between the two arms = more pressure on both your G-spot and your clit. I love a customizable vibe.

Notably, the bendability on the Nova 2 works differently than the two hinges at the heart of this company’s other bendable toy, the We-Vibe Sync. The Sync only bent in those two very specific places, while the Nova 2 can be bent more like a piece of metal wire: in various spots along its length, slowly, gradually, and with much effort. Ultimately I think this makes the Nova 2 more durable than the Sync, the floor model of which had broken in both of the sex shops where I once worked, due to customers’ overzealous manipulation of the hinges. The relative difficulty of bending the shaft also means that it’s far less likely to straighten out over time when it’s inside you, unlike some other bendable toys like the New York Toy Collective Shilo (which I otherwise like).

Also, interestingly, when I unbend the Nova 2 so it’s as straight as it’ll go, it’s often long enough to hit my A-spot (depending on where I’m at in my menstrual cycle and my arousal cycle). This is excellent news and makes the toy even more versatile than it already is, though I will say that I think it’s better suited for G-spot stimulation because of its shape.

It’s hard to tell for sure whether the motor has been updated significantly or not, because different materials can make the same motor feel different. The Nova 2’s silicone is squishier than the comparatively firm Nova 1, and what results is vibration that feels rumblier, less sharp, and more spread out within my internal clitoral network when I use it. I also found in my tests that the Nova 2 feels stronger on its top speed than the original does. If you liked the first Nova but would’ve preferred a bit more rumble and intensity, the Nova 2 will give it to you – the key phrase in that sentence being “a bit.”

The controls have been updated, in a small yet significant way: the button that lets you switch between only clitoral vibration, only internal vibration, or both at once used to be in the centre of the Nova’s control panel, in between its four other buttons that alter the vibration intensity and cycle through patterns. On the Nova 2, that button has been smartly moved to be below the rest of the control panel, meaning you’re less likely to hit it accidentally and ruin your own orgasm by, say, switching off the clitoral vibrations at a crucial juncture. The buttons are also more clearly marked now and are far easier to tell apart in the heat of the moment both by sight and by feel. And because it’s now the minus button that turns the vibe off instead of the middle button, it’s easier and more intuitive to shut it off quickly when you need to – you just hold “–” until the vibrations stop.

The overall aesthetics are worth mentioning too, since the original Nova was a friendly coral-and-white combo and the new one only comes in a sultry purply-pink. I don’t typically have strong feelings about sex toys’ colors, but I know some people do, including for reasons of potential gender dysphoria/euphoria. The Nova 2’s overall look is sleeker, with the shaft and handle streamlined into all one color and the metal charging connectors moved to the underside so you don’t have to look at ’em while the toy is in use. Oddly, the seam running along the top of each arm is more pronounced both visually and tactilely on the Nova 2 than it was on the original, but you likely won’t notice unless you have Princess & the Pea-level sensitive genitals.

Speaking of comfort, though, the clit arm of both of these toys feels a little pokey to me. It’s not exactly pointy, but sometimes it gets a bit uncomfy mid-use and I have to shuffle it around until I find a better spot on my clit (which changes throughout the arousal cycle). This problem is slightly lessened in the Nova 2 because it’s made of squishier silicone, but the shape is unchanged.

So what’s the verdict? Do you need a Nova 2 if you already have a Nova? I would say no, unless your Nova is on its last legs from heavy use, or it’s not quite powerful enough for you, or you wish you could change the angle of the internal arm, or some combination of these factors. If you’re happy with your current Nova, though, I don’t think you need to upgrade.

What about people who’ve never tried the Nova before – do they need a Nova 2? Well, as with any dual-stimulation vibe, it’s important to first consider whether you actually like both internal and external vibration simultaneously (not everyone does!). But if you’re pretty sure you do, I think there’s no better vibe in this category than the We-Vibe Nova 2. Unlike other rabbits, this one doesn’t rely on your vulva matching the exact measurements and specifications the designers had in mind – you can adjust the internal arm, bend and flex the external one, and thrust and readjust throughout a session as needed. It’s a dual-stim vibe for people who hate (most) dual-stim vibes, but don’t want to hate them. I hope other toy designers will take a cue from We-Vibe on this one (without directly ripping them off – *cough* Lelo *cough*), because we all deserve better than a vibe that hurts our innards, refuses to reach our clit, and must be kept perfectly still to remain pleasurable. We deserve a vibrator that works with us, not against us – and that’s the Nova 2.

 

Thanks to We-Vibe for sending me the Nova 2 to review! You can buy it from SheVibe if you’d like one.

Mini Reviews: Zumio S, Tenga SVR, & Satisfyer Curvy 2+

Kate Sloan

In January, a business associate flew me to California to attend ANME – the Adult Novelty Manufacturers’ Expo – to do intel for a prospective sex magazine project I had been hired to co-helm. My friend and I were tasked with cruising the aisles of the event, networking with sex toy companies who might be interested in partnering with us in various ways. The project never ended up materializing (thanks, COVID!) but it was a fun experience nonetheless – and I ended up going home with a handful of new sex toys, natch! Here are a few of them…

 

The Zumio S is an update on the classic Zumio clitoral oscillator, the king of intense pinpoint stimulation. The S, as its initial might imply, is specifically designed for people with high levels of sensitivity, like me. The tip has been broadened into a small sphere – as opposed to the narrow alien-antenna shape of the original – so its speedy circular oscillation feels less intense and more diffuse. (Oscillation, incase you need a refresher, is different from vibration in that it tends to feel “deeper” and cause less of the transient numbness vibrators can create. It’s the reason my Eroscillator is still my all-time favorite clit toy, bar none.)

Normally, I would not recommend that any toy designers make a weaker version of their product, since there’s a lot you can do to mitigate a too-strong vibrator (use it indirectly, use it through fabric, use an attachment, etc.) but there’s basically nothing you can do if your vibe is too weak, other than cry and see if the store will accept a return. However, in this case, I think Zumio actually made the right call. As I noted in my review, the original Zumio felt waaaay too strong for me, sometimes even on the lowest setting, and I only ever used the first 3 settings out of 8. The revamped S is much chiller and doesn’t make my clit want to run away. I don’t even need to use it through underwear like I did with the first model.

However, as other reviewers have pointed out, the best way to use the Zumio is to hold it against the outer labia (depending on your body – your mileage may vary). When I do this, the oscillations no longer feel like they’re zapping the tip of my clit with pure, overwhelming sensation, the way the first Zumio sometimes did; instead, they travel through my skin and flesh to stimulate the whole shaft of my clit, creating a more profound type of pleasure and much more reliable and pleasurable orgasms. It’s pretty amazing that this vibe is so strong it can get me off through two layers of labia; usually it’s only powerhouse wand vibrators that can do that.

Reviewers’ opinions are all over the map on this, but my general impression is that the Zumio S would be the best choice for the majority of people. If you really, really like intense and targeted clitoral stimulation, maybe the Zumio X or newly-released Zumio E is more your style – but if you’ve ever felt clitorally overwhelmed by a vibe, odds are good the S would be better suited to you. These toys are on the expensive side – $140 Canadian, less in the States – so if you’re at all uncertain about liking pinpoint stimulation, I’d skip ’em and go with a more universally appreciable choice like the Tango or even a Magic Wand. The Zumio line of toys is best for people who really, really adore intensely targeted clit stim – which isn’t always me, but when that’s what I want, I gotta have a Zumio.

 

I forget whether it was Bex or Kevin Patterson who first turned me on to the Tenga SVR – both of them proselytize this vibe on the regular – but in any case, I’m glad I finally got to try one out. This rechargeable vibrator is technically a cock ring, and sure, you could use it that way… but its shape and motor are such that it also works plenty great on clits. Its best-known “alternate use” is for fingerbanging (ideally fingerbanging other people, though if you’re flexible you could try it on yourself): slip your fingers through the silicone loop and vibrations will transmit through them, even while they’re inside somebody, while the rest of the vibrator can rumble wonderfully against their clit or perineum.

You know how almost every vibrator claims in its marketing copy that it’s powerful, rumbly, quiet, discreet, travel-friendly, and versatile? The Tenga SVR actually is those things. The motor fucking rules: it’s got a great bassy undercurrent of rumbliness that creeps into slightly buzzier territory as you ascend into the heights of its 5 steady speeds, but it’s never the type of annoying, desensitizing buzziness that makes my clit want to cry. The silicone is really soft and sexy to the touch, and easy to clean, especially since the toy is waterproof. This is an easy vibe for me to hold and operate, even when my hands are hurting, because its one button is easy to locate and press, and sliding my fingers through the loop ensures I won’t lose my grip on the toy. Most thoughtfully, the SVR comes with a small, plain plastic storage case that protects it from lint and dust when you toss it in your bag – and it is definitely the type of vibrator I like to toss in my bag, whether for a quick booty-call across the city or an international flight.

In the world of vibrators, the SVR often gets overshadowed by Tenga’s other offerings, many of which look like characters from My Neighbor Totoro. But the SVR is no less good for being so comparatively understated. Rather than blow their design budget on bells and whistles, with this toy Tenga opted to focus on what actually matters in a vibrator (in my view, anyway): power, ergonomics, and versatility. Kudos!

 

Finally, let’s talk about the Satisfyer Curvy 2+… I received this as-yet-unreleased toy in a swag bag at ANME and it seems it still hasn’t been released in North America yet, over 6 months later. It is, however, available from some international shops, so maybe it’ll make its way over here eventually.

Like all the toys Satisfyer is best known for, the Curvy 2+ uses “Air Pulse technology” to create a clitoral sensation that feels like the exact middle point between receiving cunnilingus from a robot and rhythmically pumping the world’s weakest clit pump. However, this one’s a bit different, for two main reasons: Firstly, it can be controlled via Satisfyer’s smartphone app (which I didn’t test, because I’m sick to death of vibrator apps, but I know some folks love ’em), and secondly, if you flip the toy around, you can use the “handle” as a vibrator. It’s designed for G-spot stimulation, but honestly, with the toy being as short and stout as it is, it’s hard for me to get enough leverage for the type of thrusting my G-spot tends to crave. I do like the curve, though, and sometimes after a clitoral-only masturbation session the likes of which I’ll often have with a Satisfyer, it’s nice to have the option of some penetration to round out the sesh, without needing to break out an additional toy if I don’t feel like it.

The controls of this vibe are somewhat confusing, and even after using it multiple times, I still sometimes can’t figure out how to get it to do what I want. It makes me miss the days when controlling Satisfyer toys was as simple as pressing one button. But if you could master the controls (which probably entails not throwing away the instructions like I did when I assumed the toy would soon be released and would have its manual posted online in PDF form), it would improve your experience a lot, as they allow you to independently control the toy’s vibrations and air pulses.

As you may know, I’m not a fan of sex toy companies stealing other sex toy companies’ designs, and Satisfyer has been particularly egregious on this front. Their “Air Pulse” toys borrow technological innovations that were (as far as I’m aware) developed by Womanizer, but usually they at least put their own design flair on ’em – I still think the Satisfyer Penguin is one of the cutest and best-designed toys in this category. Even less acceptably, though, Satisfyer has also blatantly ripped off vibrator designs from Fun Factory. They don’t seem like a terribly scrupulous company.

I’m (reluctantly) recommending the Curvy 2+ mainly because it’s one of the less expensive actually-decent-quality options available (about $50 USD or $60 CAD – I don’t have exact numbers) in this category of toys, and financial accessibility is important. But do keep in mind that one of the reasons Satisfyer’s able to keep their prices down so low is, I would imagine, the lack of need to spend money on research and development, since they’re so routinely yoinking designs and technology from other companies. But if you deeply desire a pressure-wave toy, need it to be affordable, and live in an area where this one is available, you could do a whole lot worse… in every way except for ethics, that is.

 

Thanks so much to the folks at Zumio, Tenga, and Satisfyer for providing these products for me to review!

Review: Spartacus Blown Large Realistic Glass Dildo

Kate Sloan

You might think being a sex toy reviewer for nearly a decade would’ve expanded my sexual horizons – and in many ways, it has. But in other ways, it’s just allowed me to hone in on which types of toys I really, really like, and skew my collection more and more in the direction of things I specifically adore.

On that note, I will confess to you that there are basically only 2 categories of insertable toys I unreservedly love: glass dildos, and realistic silicone dildos. Sure, there are outliers – chief among them, the stainless steel Njoy Eleven and the lacquered wood NobEssence Seduction – but for the most part, I know what I like and I stick to that.

That’s why it’s such a surprise that it’s taken me this long to acquire and try the Spartacus Blown Large Realistic Glass Dildo (phew, what a mouthful… and a vag-ful). As far as I’m concerned, it’s the best of both worlds: a realistic cock, made of glass. The good folks at Mindful were generous enough to send me one from their extensive smorgasbord of dildos.

Let me say this right upfront: you will not enjoy this dildo if you like internal stimulation that is all soft strokes and satisfying squish. If that’s your deal, but you want something of comparable dimensions, get a VixSkin Bandit instead. This glass dildo is for people who like to get fucked hard, with large, unforgiving objects. People, in other words, like me!

See, the thing is, I love realistic dildos because I love flesh-and-blood cocks. I eroticize the shape of them, the idea, and – sure – the actual physical sensations of them. I know dicks aren’t everyone’s jam, so I won’t try to argue that something about the shape of the coronal ridge and veined shaft of a cock is “designed” to “naturally” pleasure the inside of a vagina. But for me, that feels true. The right dick – paired with lube, a good vibrator, and a partner with decent stamina, patience, and aim – can get me off easily and excellently. This is why I gravitate toward dildos that look like this much-revered human appendage.

But on the other end of the spectrum are glass dildos. Obviously, there are some things dildos can do that flesh dicks simply cannot (and vice versa), and those differences are particularly apparent in toys made of glass. My most sensitive internal spots – the G-spot and the A-spot – tend to like firm pressure once they’re turned on, and sometimes even the hardest of erections just isn’t as hard as I would prefer. It’s not through any failing of these cocks’ owners; it’s just a fact of human biology.

This toy, by contrast, is if like you were hooking up with someone who had one of the biggest* and most pleasurable cocks you’d ever experienced, and suddenly a witch cast a spell on them and turned them to stone (or, in this case, glass). Yeah, that would be horrifying. But also… for me at least, their dick would suddenly start feeling at least 20% better. (Now that I think about it, this sounds like a fantasy that my death-fetishist friend Dick Wound might be into…)

*Important note for those of you who might be worried: bigger does not always equal better. Big dicks are just one item on the menu at the sex buffet. For some people, it’s their favorite item and all they ever prefer. Some people will always like smaller penetration, or none at all. As for me, I’m sometimes a size queen and sometimes I want something smaller, gentler, and/or more targeted. Don’t @ me about this. Your dick is great no matter what size it is, I promise. I just… don’t need to hear details about it in the comments section, okay? 😘

Love a realistic frenulum and coronal ridge.

This Spartacus glass dildo boasts 8 inches of insertable length and a diameter of 1.75 inches at its widest point. That’s pretty hefty, especially if you keep in mind that glass toys tend to feel bigger than silicone toys of the same dimensions because they have no give. I have to be pretty warmed up to take this one, but once I am, it’s incredibly satisfying: the tight fit enables me to feel all the subtle-yet-important veins running along the toy, and there’s more than enough length to reach my A-spot with the tip while the shaft strokes against my G-spot. I find that orgasms, especially, are enhanced by the hugeness and hardness of this toy: my vag clenches around it, pushing it yet more firmly against my erogenous zones in a rhythmic manner while I come. It reminds me of some qualities I love about the Double Trouble, only without the spot-targeting curves.

Yes, this Spartacus dildo is straight as fuck. (I am not commenting on its sexual orientation, which I don’t know. I mean its shape.) Normally I think it’s a bad idea for a toy to be this firm and this curveless; toys along these lines have caused me great pain and discomfort before. Indeed, I do have to be rrrreally turned on and rrrreally lubed up before this toy will start to feel good. But once it’s comfortably inserted, I can use the balls at the base to easily angle the tip upward, into my A-spot, so it bypasses my cervix and rams into only the area that likes to be rammed. However, obviously your mileage may vary – I would be wary of this one if you’ve had a lot of trouble with cervix-bashing toys before and haven’t found angling to be helpful in that regard.

Let’s talk about those balls, though… Balls on realistic dildos are highly controversial among sex toy nerds. Some people hate ’em, some love ’em, some don’t pay the slightest attention to ’em. I’m mostly in that latter category, but I do think that in this case they were a wise choice. As someone whose chronic illness sometimes manifests as pain and weakness in my hands and arms, it’s really important to me that dildos be easy to thrust and manipulate. The base of this dildo – which is wider than normal bases, due to the inclusion of balls – makes it possible for me to angle the toy as needed and thrust it just by rhythmically bumping the heel of my hand against the bottom, even on bad pain days. With the addition of the toy’s prominent veins, this can create a lot of sensation with minimal effort – score. If you want a similar toy without balls, Spartacus makes a ball-less one that’s just a little bit smaller (7″ by 1.5″).

The flared base of this toy makes it anal-safe – and also, fascinatingly, makes it harness-compatible. It’s really hot to think about getting fucked by someone who has a glass cock strapped on – although, if you try this, please be careful; it would be all too easy to painfully ram someone with this toy if you couldn’t feel what you were doing.

My partner has fucked me with this toy by hand and they noted that it’s easy to thrust (thanks again, balls!) and very pretty to look at. The veins make it a bit of a nightmare to clean, but if you scrub it with a washcloth or scrub brush while you’re soaping it up, you should be alright.

Overall I’m quite enamored with this Spartacus glass dildo. I hope we start to see more toys crop up in the “realistic glass” category. Dicks are lovely; glass is lovely; the combination of the two is a joy.

 

Thanks so much to Mindful for sending me this dildo to review! They have a fantastic selection of dildos in countless different shapes, sizes, and materials for you to peruse. Did you know that they rebranded recently? They used to be called My First Blush; I gotta say I like the name Mindful better! Their mission is all about providing high-quality products and exceptional customer service. Sounds good to me!

This post was sponsored, which means I was paid to write a fair and honest review. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Hot Octopuss Amo

Kate Sloan

I always find it amusing when a sex toy company makes both a product I hate and a product I love. Why does the Dame Kip satisfy my clit while the Dame Eva buzzily tumbles from my labia in laughably short order? Why does the We-Vibe Tango make me swoon while the We-Vibe Wish distracts me to the point of rage? Why does the Fun Factory Stronic Eins give me deep, throbbing orgasms while the Fun Factory LayaSpot just makes me sigh and give up?

Well, the answer is that not every sex toy works well for every body – and that’s a good thing. It means there’s enough variety within the sex toy industry to accommodate almost anyone, at least pleasure-wise.

I bring this up because today’s blog post is about a Hot Octopuss toy. Hot Octopuss previously made the Queen Bee, a vibrator that ticks several of my “I hate this” boxes: it creates far too much noise and far too little sensation, and it has a frustratingly and unnecessarily cissexist name. But Hot Octopuss shouldn’t be written off entirely, because they’ve also made several top-notch toys, like my partner’s beloved penis vibe, the Pulse, and the toy I’m reviewing today, the Amo.

The Amo is a really fucking good vibrator. Hot Octopuss is known primarily for the rumbly motors in their penile toys, and they seem to have brought that technology into the clitoral sphere. The Amo visibly and tangibly rumbles from the moment you turn it on. This is not at all a wimpy vibrator like so many on the market.

It’s also a really pretty toy. I like the black-with-red-ombré aesthetic, and the top-heavy shape sets this vibe apart from standard bullets, albeit while preventing it from being useable in, say, the bullet-vibe hole at the base of some dildos. The shape allows for a lot of different types of sensation: you can position the squishy, pointed tip on your clit if you like focused stimulation, or use various other spots on the toy’s shaft for broader and/or firmer touch.

The aforementioned squishiness is worth keeping in mind if you’re used to using hard plastic bullet vibes like the We-Vibe Tango or ScreamingO Charged Vooom. Silicone – the material that the main body of the Amo is made of – has more give to it than plastic, and also muffles vibrations slightly. The Amo’s motor is strong enough to make up for it, but if you like full-strength, focused vibrations that are almost sharp in quality, hard plastic will still probably be your best bet.

The Amo has 5 steady speeds and 5 patterns. This should be plenty for most users, although I have found myself wishing on a couple of occasions that there was just one or two extra speeds on the top end.

For me, the controls of this toy are a little awkward. One small button on one side of the shaft turns the vibe on and off, while two equally small buttons on the other side control the vibration intensity. None of the buttons are placed where my fingers naturally want to rest while holding this toy, so there’s always a bit of reaching and readjusting involved. However, if you’re someone who tends to accidentally bump buttons while using a vibe, disrupting your own pleasure, you might find this layout functions better for you.

I wish the USB-rechargeable Amo’s battery life was better – you get up to 40 minutes of use for every charge, and charging takes 2-3 hours. However, given that its best-known competitor, the Tango, has a notoriously shitty battery that has necessitated me replacing mine once every couple of years, I don’t mind needing to charge a toy more often in the short-term if it will last me longer in the long-term. (This, however, remains to be seen, as I’ve only owned my Amo for a couple of months.)

Overall, the Hot Octopuss Amo is what all too many clitoral vibrators wish they were. It’s strong, rumbly, quiet, elegant, portable, waterproof, and relatively inexpensive – just $49, versus $79–99 for toys of similar type and quality. I’m still married to my bedside bestie the Eroscillator, but the Amo has definitely entered my rotation of favored small vibes for travel and overnights. Congrats to Hot Octopuss for making something that’s not only better than their abysmal Queen Bee, but actually genuinely excellent.

 

Thanks to Hot Octopuss for sending me this toy to review!