My purse is full of lipsticks and dildos.
• What was your first vibrator?
• Some ambitious filmmakers are Kickstarting an intactivist (anti-circumcision) documentary.
• Ever tried masturbating while meditating?
• You may have heard that people are leaving EdenFantasys en masse (myself included) following some exploitative changes to their rules. Epiphora rounded up some resources for “life after Eden.”
• If you have kids, you might want to think about what to say if they find your vibrator.
I get overly excited by sex toy materials that are new to me. Somehow I always feel like they’re going to drastically transform my sex life. They usually don’t.
The Tantus Alumina Revolve is made of solid aluminum. I’d been picturing the same sort of flimsy metal that pop cans are made out of (or soda cans, for you Americans), but nope – this toy is sturdy and firm. It’s not as heavy as steel, so it’d be a good option for someone who wants metal but has weak arms or hands.
Toys from the Alumina collection each come in a padded box, quite unlike any of Tantus’ other packaging. It’s much more protective and much fancier. I might actually use this box for long-term storage, which I almost never do.
The Alumina collection has been discontinued, but the toys are still available from many retailers. I chose the Revolve because it looked like it would work best from my body; the other options include the Pace, Motion, and Flow. Each Alumina toy can be unscrewed at the middle and screwed back together with parts from other toys of the same collection, so you can basically “build your own toy” if you have multiple Aluminas.
The Revolve is meant for G-spotting. One end is a bulbous head (bulbous compared to the skinny shaft; it’s actually pretty small in diameter – about 1.3") and one end is three graduated ripples. The single-headed end is surprisingly awesome for G-spotting, reminding my vagina of other toys that have a thin shaft followed by a large round head, such as the NobEssence Fling. The sensation isn’t as intense as it would be with something curved like the Pure Wand, but this toy evidently knows its away around a G-spot.
The other end isn’t as great. It feels okay when used anally, but vaginally, it doesn’t do a damn thing for me and usually ends up poking me in the cervix. I would swap out this end if I had another Alumina toy to trade with.
Aluminum holds temperatures fabulously well. I took my Revolve in the bath with me and ran it under the tap for a few seconds, and it became deliciously warm almost immediately.
The O-ring in the middle of the toy, where the two segments connect, is a major gathering ground for fluids and lube. With the G-spot end, I don’t ever need to insert the toy that far, but the triple-ripple end does need to be inserted that far for it to feel even remotely good, so it’s a bit of a problem.
So I guess you could say that the Alumina Revolve was a half-success for me. I love the G-spotting end, but the other end is pretty useless for my vagina. Still, aluminum is pretty nifty!
I’m not the biggest fan of the Magic Wand. The vibrations are too strong, too sudden, and too surface-level. Many, many people rave about the famous Hitachi, and I am not one of them.
However. There are ways to adapt the Magic Wand to make it friendlier for people with vulvas like mine – people who prefer stimulation that is less numbing, less broad, and/or less jarring. Here are some tricks I’ve learned that work for me.
1. Warm up. You have to do it when you use big dildos so it makes sense to do it with powerhouse vibrators too. Try using a smaller vibe until you’re very turned on, and then switch to the big guns.
2. Use a fabric barrier. I usually use my Hitachi through my underwear and sometimes through my yoga pants too. Hell, if I’m on my period, I can even use it through a menstrual pad – it’s that strong. Stick some fabric between you and your wand and you may find it a lot more manageable. You can always remove those barriers later if you want a more direct sensation.
3. Get a penetrative attachment. Vixen Creations makes a beautiful silicone one, but it’s pricey, so you might want to start with a cheap porous one to make sure you like it. These attachments can be used for penetration, sure, but they also transform your Hitachi into a more pinpointed clit toy. You can focus the vibrations right onto your clit instead of having them spread over your whole vulva, and that might make it easier for you to get off with your wand.
4. Experiment with pressure. Some people need to press the wand hard against their vulva to feel anything at all. Some may have a better time if they hold the toy very, very lightly so it’s just barely grazing their genitals. Try out different amounts of pressure and see if you can find a way that works.
5. Experiment with placement. My favorite way to use my Hitachi, which I only just discovered a couple of weeks ago, is to hold it on one of my outer labia, so my clit only receives vibration via the skin next to it, and not from the wand directly. This feels really great and allows me to avoid a lot of the numbness I used to get from my Hitachi. Try positioning yours somewhere other than the place you’d normally put a vibrator; you might find a goldmine.
6. Use a dimmer switch. I do not officially recommend this, because the Hitachi isn’t meant to be used with a dimmer so you may experience electrical shorts or even electrical fires if you try it. But many people say that they wouldn’t be able to use their wand pleasurably if not for their dimmer.
7. Keep it moving. Leaving the Hitachi in one spot for too long can cause numbness. If you move it around your vulva – maybe in circles, maybe up and down, or maybe in a sporadic and unpredictable pattern of your choosing – you may escape most or all of that numbness.
What are your best Hitachi tips?
The female hormone cycle is a strange thing. I’m on hormonal birth control, so you’d think I wouldn’t have any of the odd, cyclical mood swings and changes in desire that accompany certain times of the month for many women, and yet, somehow, I do.
Every time I’m on my period, I develop a weeklong craving for realistic dildos.
My current favorite, by far, is the VixSkin Mustang. It’s easily the most realistic toy I own, in both appearance and sensation. And every time my Shark Week comes around, without fail, I end up laying a towel under my hips and going to town on myself with the Mustang. That poor little dildo has bloodstains on it more often than any other toy of mine.
The Tantus Mark O2 and Adam O2 fulfill similar cravings, though they are a fair bit firmer, so sometimes my sore menstrual cervix can’t quite handle ‘em when I’m bleeding.
Lately I’ve been trying to make up my mind about whether to buy myself a VixSkin Maverick – essentially a bigger, juicier version of the Mustang I love so much. Last night I finally went ahead and did it. It’s probably way too huge for my relatively small vag, but it’ll be something to work toward, I guess!
What kinds of sex toys do you sometimes crave? Does your hormonal cycle have anything to do with it?
(The Charmer is the pink ripply one! Other dildos pictured: Happy Valley Perk, Tantus Comet, Tantus Raptor, Fun Factory Rainbow Amor, Vixen Leo, Tantus Mark O2, and Tantus Vamp. Um, I have a lot of Tantus toys.)
The Tantus Charmer is tiny, at only 1 1/8" in diameter, and I have a habit of buying unnecessarily small dildos, which is how it ended up in my collection.
However, I’m really pleased with it. It’s like anal beads for my vag.
I know, that sounds weird, given that the vagina’s opening doesn’t widen and narrow around incoming objects like the ass does. But the feeling is still strangely similar.
The Charmer has a series of ridges along its front, which bump up against my G-spot again and again as I slide it in and out. So despite its modest girth, I can really feel it.
Mine is a gorgeous shade of pearl pink. Normally I wouldn’t choose pink over other color options but this particular incarnation of the color is lovely.
I think this would be a great dildo for someone who likes G-spot stimulation but is too tight to use most traditional G-spot toys.
It’s also a fabulous toy for anal play, and would (I imagine) work brilliantly for pegging, since it not only feels wonderful but is also small and non-representational.
The Charmer, though too small to satisfy size queens and kings, is one of the better tiny dildos I’ve impulsively bought.
Best of all, it’s in Tantus’ closeout section, so you can get it for only – wait for it – $20! I am not normally one to use the word “amazeballs” but I feel that it’s an apt word to describe this situation.