A-spot

Lusting for Lovecore: Matching My Outfits to My Favorite Uberrime Dildo!

Kate Sloan

I love sex toys, I love fashion, and I especially love opportunities to blend those two interests together. So I’m sure you can understand why I was so excited when indie sex toy company Uberrime reached out recently to ask if I’d like to write a post about…

…how custom toys can feel like an expression/extension of self? You have such a consistent and memorable collection of go-to colors in both your business branding and personal fashion, I figured if anyone would want a toy to “match,” it might be you!

Needless to say, I replied with an enthusiastic YES!

I’m a massive fan of Uberrime’s Night King dildo (here’s my review from 2019 if you’d like to read it), because its length, shape, and coronal ridge make it an absolute powerhouse for A-spot stimulation. The brand sweetly offered me a brand-new, custom-made Night King, in the colors of my choice, to highlight the extreme customizability offered on Uberrime’s site. Color isn’t the only thing you get to customize, either: you can also select your preferred firmness for your new toy, and decide whether you want a port in the base for a bullet vibrator or a Vac-U-Lock device. Gotta love a bespoke dong!

Choosing dildo colors can be a challenge for an indecisive femme comme moi, but in this case, I knew exactly what I wanted: red and pink. In other words, I wanted a “lovecore” Night King. I love these colors, but perhaps even more importantly for this post, I have a lot of clothing in these colors!

I started putting together outfits in my head before my new Night King even arrived on my doorstep – and when it did, it was so stunning in-person that I was even more excited to style it up. Ready to see the dildo-inspired ensembles I came up with?

Lounging in bed

When my friend Billy and I interviewed the kink writer Tina Horn on our podcast back in June, she said,

Part of the reason that I know I’m not femme is that I’ve learned so much about what ‘femme’ is to femmes… One of the defining things that I hear over and over again from femmes is that they’re femme when no one’s watching, or their resting state is femme, or they put on lipstick for themselves… You can put on lipstick for yourself, not because you’re brainwashed by the patriarchy!

While there are many valid definitions of femmeness, this one (among others) resonates with me – because not only do I frequently wear lipstick while alone, but I also frequently put together little loungewear ‘outfits’ that serve the sole purpose of making me feel cute while staying comfy. It’s an important outlet for my femme inclinations, especially since – what with being a chronically ill freelancer – I spend way more time in and around my bed than I do in most other places!

This is exactly the type of outfit I’d wear for a leisurely masturbation session on a Saturday afternoon, or even for a toy testing session during the week. Comfort is paramount when I’m hoping to get turned on, and this look takes that into account. (I’ve paired the Night King with a pink We-Vibe Tango X, because I – like most people with my anatomy – find dildos most pleasurable and effective when there’s some clit stimulation going on.)

What I’m wearing:
• Dark red modal slip dress – Calvin Klein Sleepwear
• Pink and red heart-print acrylic cardigan – Unique Vintage
• Bare feet

Party bimbo

Been a minute since I went to a kink conference or play party (’cause, y’know, pandemic + fibromyalgia), but I think this would be the ideal outfit to wear to something like a hypno munch or an intelligence-play workshop. Love a bimbo moment!

The lovecore Night King doesn’t exaaaactly fit inside my tiny heart-shaped purse, but that’s kind of part of the look, if you ask me…

What I’m wearing:
• Pink ribbed cropped tank top – Forever 21
• Pink and red heart-print velour trackpants – an Etsy shop that has since gone out of business
• Neon pink striped beanie – another Etsy shop that has since gone out of business!
• Raspberry pink leather heart earrings – Unicorn Collaborators
• Pink/red/orange custom Nike Air Force 1 sneakers
• Red heart-shaped bag – Kate Spade

Soft butch

One for the androgyny-enjoyers! (I count myself among your ranks…)

It’s been interesting observing the way that fluctuations in my chronic illness symptoms can influence my gender presentation. Sometimes a high-pain day will lead me to dress masc like this, because this type of outfit is more utilitarian and easier to throw together.

Occasionally my pain makes me feel so disconnected from my body that I only want to top, and not bottom, during sex – meaning that I want to do stuff to a partner, but don’t want to receive touch/pleasure directly myself, because keeping my awareness on my own body feels icky and depressing at those times. This is an outfit I might wear at a play party if I was in that type of mood, since it suggests the sex acts I am and am not up for, and gives me some soft-butch swagger that feels good when I’m in Top Mode.

What I’m wearing:
• Long-sleeved black shirt – gift from my mama
• High-waisted straight-leg jeans – Everlane
• Hot pink Doc Martens
• Aslan Leather Nicki Jaguar harness with Uberrime Night King dildo (read my review of this harness here – it’s been my fave for many years!)

Sex writer extraordinaire

Pre-pandemic, I used to write in cafés almost every day. I would tuck my laptop into a tote, throw on an energizing outfit, and then go hole up in the corner of a coffee shop to sip a latte and nibble a muffin while writing about dicks, dates, ‘n’ doms. I miss it! (I still do it once in a while, but definitely not as often.)

This would have been a perfect ensemble to wear while writing a blog post in public – say, a review of my lovecore Night King! I would toss the dildo into my bag before leaving the house, incase I needed to check its measurements or firmness, etc. while writing – surreptitiously and out of view of other patrons, of course!

What I’m wearing:
• “Run the Fuck” T-shirt – the Museum of Sex gift shop (the quote is a Betty Dodson-ism)
• Red pencil skirt – American Apparel
• Pink metallic cowboy boots – Jeffrey Campbell
• Pink leather satchel – Kate Spade (this was the first expensive/fancy bag I ever bought for myself, waaay back when I was like 22, and I still adore it)
• Red heart-shaped prescription glasses – Zenni
• Lovecore Night King + limited-edition “cherry blossom” Lamy Safari rollerball pen (gift from my spouse) + pink legal pad (gift from my brother)

Bonus outfit: Actual sex

I mean, it is a sex toy, after all…!

To tell you the truth, the Uberrime Night King has long been my spouse’s go-to dildo when she fucks me with a strap-on. As mentioned, it hits my A-spot with aplomb. You usually lose up to an inch of useable dildo length when you wear one in a harness, because of the thickness of the harness itself, but the Night King’s 8″ insertable length means it can still easily hit my A-spot even when strapped on. I chose the 12A/medium shore for this Night King, and I’m glad I did, because that firmness makes it feel incredible pounding into my spot again and again. (It helps a lot that my spouse’s strap game is top-notch, of course…)

The most recent time that my partner came to visit me, she had brought her harness, and we decided to try out my new Night King… and once she slid it into her harness and lubed it up, I was so struck by how hot it looked with her outfit that I asked if I could snap a photo for this post. Luckily for me (and for all of you!!), she obliged. And then, naturally, we had excellent strap-on sex 🤤

So, here is a very real-life example of how sex toy aesthetics can amp up excitement and arousal. Red is my spouse’s signature color, and one that looks exceptionally good on her, whether in the form of a lipstick, a mesh tank top, or (yes) a custom-made dildo – and I love that this dildo can easily be incorporated into both of our aesthetics, even though our styles are pretty different from each other!

What she’s wearing:
• Red mesh tank top – a fetishwear shop in Berlin called Schwarzer Reiter
• RodeoH briefs harness
• Uberrime Night King dildo, of course 😍

If this post has got you curious about matching your outfit to your dildo – or matching your dildo to your outfit! – then why not check out the Night King and the rest of Uberrime’s catalog, and pick the color(s) that make(s) your heart sing? Life’s too short for ugly toys in depressing shades; I want my toys to be bright and beautiful works of art, and Uberrime makes some of the prettiest silicone dildos I’ve ever seen. Pretty enough, even, to be a crucial component of some of my high-femme outfits. 💖

 

This post was sponsored by Uberrime, who I really, truly adore. As always, all writing and opinions (and outfits, except for my spouse’s!) are my own.

Review: VVD Rider Desire Sex Saddle

Kate Sloan

“Rideable vibrator” is a fun phrase to say out loud. Go ahead, try it!

I don’t often have occasion to say it out loud, because I don’t often review rideable vibes. They tend to be huge, and I live in a tiny apartment in downtown Toronto where space is at a premium!

But once in a blue moon, there will be a rideable vibe intriguing enough that I’ll make an exception… and the VVD Rider Desire Sex Saddle is one of those, not least because it’s quite a bit smaller than its most famous predecessors. Let’s talk about it.

Gratuitous thigh/tattoo shot for scale

What is the VVD Rider Desire Sex Saddle?

VVD, which stands for “Viva Desire,” is a women-led company that currently makes only one product (you guessed it: the Rider Desire). While I’d put it in the same general category as other rideable vibes like the Sybian and Cowgirl, the Rider Desire is much smaller, lighter, cheaper, and easier to set up. It’s also rechargeable rather than plug-in.

Shape-wise, it’s “inspired by the thrill of” horseback riding, in that it’s shaped like a saddle and you can rock back and forth on it, similarly to something like a Liberator Jaz Motion.

The Rider Desire has several functions: there’s a clitoral stimulator (called the “clit tapping” function) near the front for you to grind against, and there’s a “magnetic docking slot” where you can optionally insert one of the three penetrative attachments that comes with the toy. One attachment vibrates, one thrusts, and one “taps” against internal erogenous zones (more on that below). It also has a heating function.

Clit stimulator + magnetic docking port

Things I like about the Rider Desire

  • I appreciate that this toy has a clit stimulator and that it actually feels really good, since clit stimulation often seems to be an afterthought in dual-stimulation toys, despite it being absolutely central to most vulva-havers’ pleasure. The Rider Desire’s “clit tapper” technology reminds me a lot of the Hot Octopuss Pulse Queen, which similarly uses a tapping-esque sensation to stimulate the clit; it feels much rumblier, deeper, more impactful, more pleasurable and less numbing than standard vibration. As a matter of personal preference, I also like that it’s more pinpointed/focused here than the blunt-force clit stimulation you get from vibes like the Sybian or Cowgirl.
  • This toy can be controlled either via its included remote control, or via the toy’s own built-in buttons. VVD specifically asked me to talk about the potential kinky usages of this toy, and while it’s not intrinsically a kink toy per se, ceding the remote to your partner would put a lot of power into their hands, and I’m sure they’d enjoy watching you ride the vibe 😈 As for the buttons on the toy itself, I ended up preferring them over the remote, because they’re located right where my hand naturally rests when I’m grinding against the toy – and it took me only a few minutes of use to memorize their shapes and locations, so I could operate the toy without looking at the buttons.
  • I like that the Rider Desire can be used without an attachment if you’re ever in the mood for à la carte clit stimulation (which I frequently am), or if you just want to warm yourself up before moving on to penetration.
  • It’s really, really cool to me that the toy’s 3 attachments aren’t just shaped and sized differently – they actually do different things. This is quite unusual and I imagine it was difficult to program! My favorite attachment by far is the “tapping” one, which has an A-spotty shape and rapidly “taps” against that spot in a way that reminds me of top-notch fingerbanging. There are 13 tapping modes to choose from. My second-favorite is the thrusting attachment, which can be positioned to thrust against my G-spot or my A-spot, depending on how far I insert it; it has 6 different settings (3 steady ones and 3 patterns). The plain ol’ vibration attachment was less exciting to me, because I prefer motion over vibration when it comes to internal sensations, but its vibrations are rumbly and pleasant nonetheless.
  • The pelvic rocking ‘n’ rolling motion that this vibrator encourages is quite natural-feeling and fun, even for me, someone who is used to masturbating while laying down on her back. I think a toy like this would be even more enjoyable for someone who initially learned to masturbate by grinding against things and/or still regularly gets off that way now.
  • The Rider Desire is quite lightweight for a rideable vibrator, at just 4.24 lbs (or “no more than 3 bottles of water,” according to VVD). This has its pros and cons – the main “con” being that it doesn’t stay put as well as a heavier toy while you’re riding it – but for me it’s almost entirely a “pro,” because I physically can’t lug heavy vibrators around very often so this toy’s lightness makes it likelier I’ll actually use it. (Also, incase you were wondering, the toy has a max capacity of 330 lbs, but users tend to distribute some of their weight onto their knees when using a toy like this, so really it could probably be enjoyed by users up to 400 lbs or heavier, I’d imagine.)
  • There are some grippy traction strips on the bottom of the toy to help it stay in place while you’re riding it, which is a thoughtful choice on the part of the designers, although this feature doesn’t always work super great (more on that later).
  • The magnets that anchor the attachments in place are reasonably strong, such that I think you could safely use this toy for anal penetration without fear of an attachment popping off inside you and getting lost up there. (However, it’s designed for vulvovaginal use and works best that way.)
  • This toy is IPX5 splashproof. Normally this would be a “con” for me, because I like to use toys in the bath so I prefer them to be fully waterproof, but it would be kind of impractical to do that with this one, and I appreciate that it’s at least splashproof so I can wash it off in the sink without issue. (The attachments can be detached and washed separately.)
  • The Rider Desire’s $350 price tag will certainly be well out of the range of affordability for many people, but I think it’s a reasonable price for what you get – a sturdily-built vibe with multiple different attachments and functions – especially considering that heavier-duty rideable vibes will set you back $1,000–1,500. (Oh, and I’ve got a discount code for you, which’ll make it a bit cheaper. Check the end of this post for deets!)
From L to R: vibrating attachment, tapping attachment, thrusting attachment, charging cable, remote control

Things I don’t like about the Rider Desire

  • As with all rideable vibrators, I don’t think my body is especially compatible with this toy. I have fibromyalgia, which causes joint pain (among other things), but even before I developed fibro, my knees and hips just never had much flexibility/range of motion, so invariably, sitting astride a toy like this will make all the joints in my lower body start screaming with pain within a few minutes. I found it most comfortable to bend over/lean forward into an almost doggie-style position, as this didn’t require as deep of a knee bend as sitting upright on the toy, so I could sustain it for longer.
  • Unfortunately, I find it difficult to reach orgasm with this toy, because the clit stimulator only has one steady vibration mode. The other 12(!) of its modes are patterns (pulsing, escalating, and so on), which don’t give me as much direct control over what I’m feeling at any given time. The steady mode is the only one where I can guarantee it’ll stay consistent enough to get me off – except, because there’s only one (mid-level) steady speed, invariably I end up wanting more power at some point and have no way to simply turn it up. IMO all vibrators should have, at minimum, 3-5 steady speeds to choose from, especially since the majority of people prefer them over patterns.
  • Naturally, because this toy is rechargeable and not plug-in, you’re not gonna get the sheer power you’d expect from something like a Sybian. I still found it pretty impressively powerful for its size though, and surprisingly rumbly. Applying pressure and rocking back and forth didn’t seem to slow down the thrusting or tapping of the internal attachments, either.
  • Some people might have issues getting the clit stimulator to line up correctly while one of the attachments is inserted, for the same reason that all dual-stim vibes are tricky to get right: different bodies are different. However, I have a fairly wide clit-to-vag distance, and I could still get the clit stimulator to reach my clit without much difficulty; I just had to shimmy around sometimes, tilt the toy at a slightly different angle, etc. to get it positioned where I wanted it.
  • The grippy strips on the bottom of the toy don’t seem to anchor it very well if I’m only using the toy clitorally. I have to physically hold the vibe in place or else it slips ‘n’ slides all over the bed. (Once I’ve got an attachment installed in the toy and inserted inside me, though, the vibe doesn’t tend to move around much.)
  • Some of the attachment functions are loud and shrill-sounding when in use, especially the thrusting one. This tends to be par for the course for self-thrusting toys but is still worth noting.
Tapping attachment/A-spot whisperer

Final thoughts

When I agreed to review this toy from VVD, even though I barely have the space for more behemoth vibrators, it was because I had a feeling that this one might actually be good… and it is! I think the VVD Rider Desire is a thoughtfully-designed toy, ideal for anyone who likes to ride/hump/grind their way to bliss – or anyone who wants a dual-stim toy they can use hands-free, for disability reasons or otherwise.

That being said, I’m not the target audience for a rideable vibe like this one, because it necessitates a physical position that my body just can’t maintain for very long – and I found it challenging to overcome the lack of steady clitoral stimulation settings: the toy’s one steady clit stim setting feels pretty damn good, just not good enough to make me come.

But the tapping and thrusting attachments are so excellent that I’m willing to overlook these issues for an occasional session. I don’t think there’s any other toy in my collection that I can ride up and down on, and grind my clit against, while having my A-spot rhythmically tapped and massaged. It’s certainly the closest a toy’s ever come to replicating the hot moment during cowgirl-position sex where I get so lost in pleasure that I can’t even maintain my rhythm anymore, so my partner is forced to thrust up into me while I tremble atop them… 🤤

Aaaanyway… If any of this sounds good to you, maybe you’ll want to take the VVD Rider Desire for a ride, too. 😉

 

You can use the coupon code KateS20 to get $20 off your Rider Desire at checkout!

This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Mr. Hankey’s Toys Captain’s Hook dildo

Kate Sloan

When I put the Captain’s Hook from Mr. Hankey’s Toys inside me for the first time, I said out loud, “Oh, this is gonna be my new favorite silicone dildo.” I think I was right. Let’s talk about why.

 

What is the Captain’s Hook, and how can it be customized?

The lovely folks at Mr. Hankey’s told me I could choose any 3 toys from their site to review (the other 2 reviews will be published in July and August, respectively, so keep an eye out for that!). Their catalogue of products is extensive, so it took me a while to pick some out – but the Captain’s Hook was a “fuck yes” as soon as I saw it.

It’s a realistic (i.e. dick-like) dildo, but with a strong upward curve not often found in human dicks. I am a fan of penises, to say the least, and this is a pretty perfect one if you’re looking for more intense G-spot or prostate stimulation than most flesh-and-blood cocks can offer.

Mr. Hankey’s products are almost all customizable, and this one is no exception. You can choose between 4 different sizes (S–XL), 4 different firmness levels, and about a zillion different colors, plus you can tell them whether or not you want a Vac-U-Lock hole in the base so you can use the toy with Vac-U-Lock-compatible harnesses, fucking machines, etc. (although the brand points out that this particular toy isn’t recommended for fucking machines because it might rotate due to being too heavy).

For my Captain’s Hook, I went with the small size, medium firmness, red color, and no Vac-U-Lock hole. (If you want some help choosing your desired firmness, check out this video the brand made. I went with the medium because I knew I wanted it to feel impactful enough on my G-spot, but didn’t want its veiny texture to feel overwhelming, as super-firm textured dildos often do for me.)

Like many other fantasy dildo companies, Mr. Hankey’s toys tend to be on the larger side – so even though I chose the “small” Captain’s Hook, it’s still one of the girthiest dildos I own, with a diameter ranging from 2″ just under the head to 2.2″ near the base. Its insertable length is about 7″.

 

My experience with the Captain’s Hook + some tips

As with any large penetrative toy, I’d recommend getting really turned on before you attempt to get this bad boy inside you. I always warmed up with a lot of clitoral stimulation, fantasy/erotica/porn, etc. when testing it. It’s like stretching before you climb a mountain – simply the sensible thing to do! Fortunately, the tapered tip of this toy makes it easier to insert than it otherwise would be, especially when drizzled liberally with a good water-based lube.

Besides comfort and safety, the other reason to warm up beforehand is sensitivity. The G-spot and prostate both swell with arousal, making them easier to access and stimulate. And hoo boy, does this toy ever stimulate my G-spot. The substantial girth, deep curve, and defined coronal ridge all come together to form a G-spot homing device – a phrase I’ve previously only used to describe the stainless steel Njoy Pure Wand. Now, don’t get me wrong, the Captain’s Hook doesn’t feel like the Pure Wand, exactly – silicone doesn’t feel like steel! – but their effects on my G-spot are similarly prone to knocking the wind out of me and making me squirt.

However, maybe the most amazing thing to me about the Captain’s Hook is that it can also hit my A-spot!! It’s rare for a toy to be good at G-spot and A-spot stimulation, because usually the pronounced curve required for G-spot stim is incompatible with comfortably sliding deeply enough to hit the A-spot. But because I chose the medium firmness, this dildo has juuust enough flexibility that it straightens out somewhat when I push it deep, so that it can stroke my A-spot when that’s what I’m craving. When I pull it back out to a shallower position, it immediately re-forms into its strongly curved shape, like it’s transforming back into G-spot mode. Fucking brilliant dildo design, if you ask me!

Thrusting hard and fast with this dildo, when I’m super turned on, is so intense that I’ve sometimes thought I could have a penetrative orgasm from it. This is particularly amazing because, like the majority of people with vulvas, I require clitoral stimulation in order to get off – so, even though I’ve still never had an orgasm from penetration alone and might never, it definitely impresses me when a dildo makes that type of climax feel within reach. Also, notably, this dildo is so stimulating internally that I don’t tend to need as much clit stim in order to get off – in one testing session, for instance, I came while my Eroscillator was on its first speed, an event so rare that I can probably count on one hand how many times it’s happened in the 12 years I’ve owned an Eroscillator. WTF!

I didn’t try the Captain’s Hook anally, because frankly my butt isn’t that accommodating or that brave, but I bet this would be a killer prostate dildo too, if the dimensions were manageable for you.

 

Chonky base alert!

Other cool things about the Captain’s Hook

I don’t tend to “ride” my dildos, but this one has a big, chunky base that would make it suitable for that type of play. It doesn’t have a suction cup, but its flat bottom and heavy base allow it to stay put relatively well during riding, at least if you’re on a flat, hard surface. The flared base also makes it harness-compatible. I imagine someone fucking me with this dildo in their harness would be a wild time.

I also gotta say, I love the red color. It’s very striking, and reminds me (fittingly) of the actual Captain Hook’s iconic red coat. I’ll show you, you cowardly crocodile!

 

Some potential drawbacks to consider

The possible “cons” of this toy are about what you’d expect: some users will find it uncomfortably large, and the veiny texture (while relatively subtle, as far as fantasy dildos go) might feel too intense for some people, especially in a hard firmness and/or with insufficient lube.

This toy is also somewhat heavy for a silicone dildo, owing in part to its hefty base. I have muscle strength issues from fibro and sometimes found that my arm would get tired when thrusting hard and fast with this dildo for a while. Switching arms helps, of course, and so does adding more lube, because the less friction there is, the less hard I have to push and pull the toy.

 

Final thoughts

I love the Captain’s Hook. There are a lot of girthy realistic dildos that I enjoy when I’m in the mood for them, but don’t think I’ve ever tried one that hits my G-spot and A-spot as relentlessly as this one. It leaves me breathless, and sometimes makes me forget my clit even exists (…for a few minutes, anyway… I’ll never actually forget about you, baby!).

While certainly this dildo wouldn’t be everyone’s cup of tea due to its substantial size and extreme curve, for me it’s the ideal toy when I really want to be filled up and pounded. No other realistic dildo in my collection is as deeply curved as this one; dick-like dildos tend to be enjoyable moreso for how they “fill up the hungry spot” inside me (to quote Nina Hartley), not for how they target specific spots. So to have a toy that can do both is just… *chef’s kiss*!

 

Thanks to Mr. Hankey’s Toys for sending me this product to review! This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

I Designed an Accessible A-Spot Dildo, & It’s Available Now!

Kate Sloan
Photo via the Pleasure Tailor

I’ve been reviewing sex toys for nearly a decade, but with the exception of a surprise dildo-making party at an Oregon glassblowing shop, I’ve never made my own sex toy.

So you can understand why I practically jumped out of my chair with glee when the folks at the Pleasure Tailor emailed me to ask if I’d like to collaborate with them on a sex toy design. And I’m glad to say that the final product, the Easy A, is available for purchase now. But let me back up and tell you the story of how it came to be!

 

The person who emailed me, West, explained that his company was trying to “amplify underrepresented voices by enabling experts from various communities to design their own sex toys.” I knew immediately that I wanted to design a toy that would serve my needs as a person who lives with chronic pain and muscle strength issues due to fibromyalgia. I also knew I wanted it to be a dildo that targets the A-spot. (That’s the erogenous zone deep inside the vagina on the front wall, and the one that has been my #1 favorite internal erogenous zone for many years, for those who don’t know.)

Accessible toys and A-spot toys have some commonalities: there’s not very many of either, for one thing, but on the plus side, more are starting to pop up here and there. For example, the company Bump’n recently launched the Joystick, a product designed by and for disabled folks that allows hands-free usage of toys like vibrators, dildos, and strokers. On the A-spot side of things, companies like Uberrime and Tantus have multiple toys in their lineup now that can reach that spot with relative ease.

What I haven’t seen, however, is a toy that is both A-spot-targeted and accessible for people who have limitations like mine. So when West emailed me to ask what I’d like to design, I started making some sketches. I’m not much of a visual artist, but they gave us a good starting point.

Initially, I wanted to make a toy that had angled finger holes in the base, like the NobEssence Fling, while also boasting an A-spot-friendly curve at the tip, like the Tantus Tsunami. I had found finger holes to be a useful innovation during pain flare-ups when my hands could barely stroke my clit without pain, let alone pound a dildo in and out of me at the intensity I prefer. They allowed me to maintain control over the toy without having to grip/squeeze it in my hand. But I’d only ever seen them in toys aimed at the G-spot, so I hadn’t been able to harness their helpfulness in pursuit of A-spot stimulation.

West and I went back and forth via email for a while; he showed me designs, I made suggestions, he made adjustments, I tried a prototype, I sent more feedback, he made more adjustments.

Eventually, he said he wasn’t sure finger holes were the right choice after all, since they were difficult to make out of silicone in a cost-effective way, and would also limit the user in terms of what position their wrist could be in. If, for example, you like to lift one leg and loop your arm around it to grab your dildo, the finger holes would be at the wrong angle to do that.

But the Pleasure Tailor team had come up with a solution. They created a two-tiered base meant to be held between your fingers. This way, you can push and pull the dildo in and out with a fairly light touch and it’ll still move as responsively as it would if you were gripping it more firmly. This design still had the intended effect of increased accessibility, but was easier to manufacture and also easier to use from a variety of different angles. Have I mentioned that the folks at the Pleasure Tailor are geniuses?!?

Image via the Pleasure Tailor

Let’s talk about how this thing targets the A-spot, though… because, hoooo boy, it sure does. The Easy A is made of triple-density silicone, meaning that it has a firm silicone core that gives it its shape, covered by two layers of progressively squishier silicone. This is important because the A-spot is nestled in front of the hyper-sensitive cervix, so you don’t want to ram it with something super hard right off the bat – but once the toy is actually pressed against your A-spot, you may want (or at least, I certainly want) firm pressure. The Easy A is squishy enough to feel comfortable, but firm enough to actually do what it sets out to do: stroke the fuck out of your A-spot.

I have found this toy very effective for that purpose. Like all toys used for deep penetration, this one requires some amount of warm-up – but once I’m relaxed, turned on, and have inserted the toy all the way, it finds my spot with practically zero effort on my part. And when I locate it, I can hit it over and over again with a simple flick of my wrist or bend of my fingers.

One of my favorite features of the Easy A is a small raised marking on the base which aligns with the upward curve of the toy. This makes it so that the toy will never rotate around inside you without you knowing or noticing – you can always look down to check whether the marking is centered, and recenter it if necessary so that the toy will keep hitting your spot as intended.

Image via the Pleasure Tailor

Some other random features of this toy that I think are cool:

  • Presumably, if you were to rotate it 180°, you could use it to stroke the posterior fornix instead of the anterior fornix. I’m not a posterior fornix aficionado so I can’t 100% confirm whether it works well for that purpose, but I’d be interested to hear from someone who is, if they try this toy!
  • It doesn’t look like it would be harness-compatible, because the two-tiered base looks like it would make the dildo flop around too much in a harness, but actually, the core of the dildo is so firm that it works surprisingly well in a strap-on. So you can use it for easier masturbation or you can have a partner strap it on if they want to hit your deep spot too.
  • It’s fucking bright blue!! Just looking at it makes me happy!

You can buy the Easy A right now for $125.00. But fascinatingly, the Pleasure Tailor also offers the ability to customize this toy to your own specifications. If, for example, you like the basic idea of it but would prefer it in a different color, size, firmness, or finish, you can let them know and they’ll make it just the way you want it. How cool is that?!

If you try the toy I designed, I hope you love it! I’m certainly going to treasure mine forever 🥰

Review: Tracy’s Dog Craybit

Kate Sloan

My relationship with the sex toy company Tracy’s Dog didn’t exactly start off on the right foot. Er, the right paw.

They’ve sent me a bunch of pitch emails over the years, often containing weird glaring missteps, like accidentally addressing me as Emmeline (she was my roommate at the Woodhull conference once, but we’re not the same person!) and – in the most recent case – kiiinda plagiarizing my own writing back at me.

I got an email from Tracy’s Dog a while ago about their new rabbit vibe, the Craybit (so called because its strange tagline is “Let’s get crazy a little bit”). This toy’s claim to fame is that it has three motors: one to target the clit, one to target the G-spot, and one to target one of my very favorite erogenous zones, the A-spot. “You might be familiar with the G-Spot stimulation from toys and fingering, but have you ever experienced A-Spot orgasm?” their email asked. (Uh, yes, I have been known to.) “The feeling of hitting A-Spot is totally different from G-Spot [sic]. It is a more intense, molten-hot, addictive sensation that melts your soul and your body!”

That phrasing gave me déja vu, so I googled it, and… the only instance online of the phrase “molten-hot, addictive” is in an article I wrote for Glamour about the A-spot. Guess this company liked the piece. 😂

While this is aggravating, it also made me reflect on how this points to the little-known-ness of the A-spot. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen someone crib language from my own writing on this topic when extolling the virtues of the A-spot – especially since, aside from a few other sex writers I know such as Zoe Ligon and Cy of Super Smash Cache (both of whom are excellent), not many people go into detail about this spot on a regular basis.

The only reason I can think of for this linguistic borrowing is that the companies’ copywriters haven’t experienced A-spot pleasure themselves. If they had, they would be able to write about it in their own words. And while part of that is due to the simple fact that not everyone likes A-spot stim (just as not everyone likes G-spot or prostate stim), another part of it is due to how seldom the A-spot is discussed and explained compared to erogenous zones whose names show up more often on Cosmopolitan and Men’s Health covers.

All this to say, it’s always a thrill for me to see new toys being developed and released that specifically mention the A-spot in their marketing copy (ideally in the companies’ own words). It means that not only is the desire for A-spot stimulation being affirmed – it’s being actively catered to. Hooray!

The Craybit rabbit comes in an elegant black cardboard gift box with the company logo lettered on it in silver script. Inside is a charging cable for this USB-rechargeable toy, and an instruction booklet which details the vibe’s 15 (!) modes. These are pretty unique as far as vibrator patterns go, because the Craybit is juggling three motors at once. Some of the modes are more basic – all three motors on a steady speed, or all three thumping in synchrony – but some are more complex: the clit vibe can thrum in hills and valleys while the internal motors pulse erratically, for example, or each motor can throb in turn, like they’re singing in a round together.

Unfortunately none of these patterns do what I really want this type of vibe to be able to do: vibrate steadily on my clit while the internal motors pound rhythmically. My erogenous zones each crave a different type of stimulation, and I know I’m not alone in that. What my A-spot and G-spot want is always gonna be different from what my clit wants, and these patterns get it frustratingly almost-right. The closest to my ideal is the 8th one, which alternates between a low and high speed on the clit, stays steadily low on the G-spot, and pulses for a few beats on the A-spot before vibrating normally for a few more beats and then starting over at the beginning. As such, this vibe works better for me as a foreplay tease than as a “finisher.”

The motors are pretty decent – or possibly they just feel like they are because there are three of them. (Kinda like how three mediocre actors reciting the same Shakespeare monologue in unison would impress me more than just one of them stumbling through it.) I can’t actually isolate them to test them each on their own because all 15 of the toy’s modes utilize all three motors at once. This is ultimately the toy’s main flaw – that you can’t control the motors individually. I realize it would be a lot of buttons to have to cram onto the handle of a vibrator, but I really wish it were an option, even just via a Bluetooth app on your phone (and I am not normally one to say vibrator apps are good!). The perennial problem with rabbit vibrators is that everyone’s body is different so it’s hard for a dual-stimulation toy to get the stimulation right in both its motors for any particular person, and that problem is, of course, compounded once you introduce a third motor.

That said, my G-spot and A-spot appreciate the strong rumbliness of the Craybit’s internal motors. I just wish the clit motor was less buzzy (as far as I can tell, it’s the buzziest of the three), and that there were some lower speed settings. Even the lowest steady pattern feels overwhelming if I’m not warmed up – in much the same way as those three bad Shakespearian actors would be overwhelming if you were only expecting one or two to show up.

The clit stimulator is one of those classic two-pronged “bunny ears” situations. I actually like this one better than most others of its type, because the ears are made of solid, substantial silicone so they don’t flap around as much as these usually do, and it’s easier to get them to stay put on my clit. However, I know that’ll make it less appealing for people who find the flapping-around pleasurable.

The relative solidness of the bunny ears also introduces some problems, mainly that when I do need to adjust their positioning, I often end up accidentally slingshotting them onto my clit in a way that feels like a tiny slap. Not ideal… unless you’re into that.

The handle of the toy buzzes annoyingly when it’s on, but honestly I can’t really fault the designers for that – it’s a lot of vibration in one product, so I can see how it would be hard to keep the toy’s handle issues, uh, handled. Fortunately the toy is shaped such that it stays anchored in place pretty well in my vagina, snug against my G-spot and A-spot, so I can use it hands-free if I want to. The shape also makes it so that the most natural-feeling way to thrust this toy (if indeed you choose to thrust with it) is to use short, deep motions, which are exactly what my A-spot likes anyway. It’s a very thoughtful design.

There are a lot of weird things about Tracy’s Dog’s overall branding and marketing that I need to address. First of all, does anyone else immediately start singing “Tracy’s Dog has got it going on“ upon reading this company’s name? Secondly, did they really need to evoke a dog in the name of their, um, SEX TOY company? Thirdly, why do they have a YouTube channel where a hot tattooed man dressed like a cowboy answers frequently asked questions about the toy while shirtless, drinking whiskey, lighting a cigarette, playing a guitar, playing the chimes, staring pensively into a mirror, and giving problematic misinformation about the hymen while playing pool? …Okay, I have to admit I like the tattooed cowboy. But he raises even more questions for me than he answers. Is he supposed to be Tracy?! Is the dog in this video therefore the eponymous Tracy’s dog? Why is he always hanging out in what appears to be the world’s coolest saloon/motorcycle garage/house? Is he an actor who the company hired to perform in these videos? If so, where can I see the rest of his filmography in its entirety? Enquiring minds need to know.

I also noticed in my research for this review that some of the Craybit’s marketing copy says it’ll give you “an orgasm so intense that it straightens your legs out like a fainting goat,” which is how I ended up reading the whole Wikipedia article on fainting goats while absent-mindedly thrusting the toy in and out of me during a testing session. (Thanks to my friend Sarah, who loves goats, for enlightening me on this topic.) I don’t think I developed an odd fetish as a result of this episode, but who the hell knows. I also noticed that the same page contains a graphic that again uses my “molten-hot, addictive” turn of phrase. Guess it’s hard for an old dog to learn new tricks.

Overall, I like this vibe, and I love that it exists – yay, A-spot rep! – but I can’t say I’ll be reaching for it a lot. The Tracy’s Dog Craybit is an overwhelming vibrator that assails three of my major erogenous zones with strong simultaneous vibration. It does that very well, but that’s not really what I want out of a sex toy – I want to be able to control the sensations each spot feels at any given time, and that includes being able to start on a low speed. However, I can recommend this toy for you if you want a vibrator that will rock your entire internal clitoris with powerful patterns and va-va-voom vibrations – in other words, a vibrator that’ll make you feel, I guess, like a fainting goat.

 

This post was sponsored, which means that Tracy’s Dog paid me to write an honest and fair review of their product. As always, all writing and opinions are entirely my own.