chastity

I only worked in sex toy retail for a few months, but I can’t even tell you the number of people who came in searching for penis enlargement products. In fact, it was explicitly part of my training to learn which products actually work on a long-term basis (answer: almost none of them) and which are basically bullshit – although, of course, being in retail, we wouldn’t have phrased it quite like that!

Penis pumps, I have learned, are somewhere in the middle of that spectrum – they offer some temporary enlargement by way of suction encouraging bloodflow to your dick, but that’s not their main or most effectual purpose. Penis pump results are usually more about engorgement, arousal, and pleasure than they are about size – and if you use them with that expectation held firmly (heh) in your mind, I think you’ll have a much better time with them. (Just make sure to read about the risks of using them, and maybe even discuss ’em with your doctor before you do, okay?)

To get you started, here are 5 ways to play with penis pumps in your sex/kink life…

 

Size play. I know I just said these pumps do other things much better than they do enlargement… BUT… they do create a temporary and usually minor enlargement of the penis that can be really thrilling, especially if you in any way fetishize “big dicks,” “monster cocks,” “raging boners,” and so on. (I mean, in our phallus-obsessed culture, it’s hard not to have internalized some of these ideas of hotness, even if you’ve later learned to reject them for the body-shaming beliefs that underlie them.) Whether the dick being pumped up into immensity is a partner’s or your own, it may be exciting to see it become bigger, veinier, and more intimidating for a few minutes. It might even change the penis-wielder’s sense of self (and/or their partner’s sense of them) enough that they’ll feel inspired to do some kind of roleplay scene that takes advantage of their newfound cartoonish hugeness.

Press a vibrator against it. I saw someone do this in a porn clip recently and now I can’t stop thinking about it… The combination of suction and vibration can be terrifically overwhelming, and if the chap in the video I saw is anything to go by, it seems like trying to wring an orgasm out of this method would be a long, slow, teasing process, potentially resulting in a climax half-ruined by the indirectness of the stimulation. If you’re into that, hey, I’m not gonna stop you.

Chastity/denial. It’s amazing to me that I’ve read so many screeds over the years about how “blue balls” are so painful that those tormented by this sensation should be given sex out of pity (oh, boohoo, Chad, go jerk off like an adult), given that there are tons of people who enjoy and actually seek out that sensation. Not just blue balls, either, but sometimes the overall sense of intense arousal with no resolution in sight. I think it would be especially cruel to take someone out of chastity for the first time in days or weeks, shove their dick into a penis pump, use it to crank up their arousal, and then… not let them come. Back into the chastity cage you shall go! (Just as soon as your boner deflates, that is… which, let’s face it, could take a while…)

Put on a show. Most penis pumps are transparent or translucent, making them the perfect prop for an exhibitionist moment. This could be particularly useful if, due to current global circumstances, you find yourself separated from the person/people you love to fuck. I have found few long-distance sexual experiences more intimate and bonding than watching my partner try out a totally new-to-them sex toy in front of their webcam for my viewing pleasure.

Medical play. If I’m into the fantasy of a Victorian-era doctor administering clitoral stimulation by hand in order to cure me of hysteria, I have to assume there are people with penises out there who relish the thought of a sexy doctor pumping up their dick to address erectile dysfunction. As a roleplay, this could be a small penis humiliation scene if you’re into that, packed with devastating jibes about your dick’s inability to function – or it could be an ASMR-style calming experience involving focused attention and caring concern. Sounds great either way to me!

What crafty ideas come up for you when you contemplate adding a penis pump into your kinky repertoire?

 

This post contains a sponsored link. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.