vibrator

Review: Jimmyjane Hello Touch

Kate Sloan

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I don’t know how to feel about Jimmyjane. Their Form 2 is one of my favorite vibrators ever, but I hated their Iconic Rabbit. I enjoy their elegant, minimalist designs and marketing, but at the same time, they can be really pretentious sometimes.

Their newest release is the Hello Touch, a duo of tiny vibrators that you strap onto your fingers and operate via a control panel embedded in an accompanying wristband. It pretty much straddles that line between Jimmyjane’s great qualities and its annoying ones.

This review is a hard one for me to write, because the Hello Touch is marketed as a couples’ toy, so both my opinion and my boyfriend’s should be reflected in the review – and we disagree on this toy.

I like the Hello Touch’s aesthetic – it reminds me of iPod earphones and those armbands that athletic folks tuck their iPods into – but my boyfriend says he thinks it’s ugly and tacky-looking.

The finger-bands fit my fingers fine, but on my boyfriend, they’re uncomfortably tight. His fingertips were literally purple after using the Hello Touch for 20 minutes or so, and I don’t think he has freakishly big hands for a man. (I don’t know what his ring size is, but mine is 6, if that helps you at all.)

Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but: the Hello Touch is not powerful. It’s marketed as being three times as strong as any other fingertip vibrator, and that may well be true, but fingertip vibrators are infamously weak. Furthermore, it has only one speed, which is a dealbreaker for many women – including me, usually.

The Hello Touch runs on two AAAA batteries (who the fuck has AAAA batteries just lying around their house, by the way? Not me!), but it’s not much stronger than your typical watch battery bullet. You have to keep in mind, though, that the Hello Touch is not the kind of vibrator you just set down on your clit and leave it there til you come; the vibrations are meant to enhance the stimulation already being provided by fingers, which explains why they’re not that strong on their own.

The wristband is comfortable, stretchy, and has a compartment for the vibrator’s battery pack, on which the on and off buttons are located. This would be a great design, except for the fact that the buttons are impossible to push through the fabric of the wristband. Seriously, you have to press down soooo hard to get the vibe to turn on – and I know it’s not just due to me being a weakling, because my boyfriend had the same trouble. Every time, we’ve had to take the battery pack out of the wristband compartment and turn it on that way, which ruins the intended convenience of the wristband system.

With all that said, though, I actually enjoy the way the Hello Touch feels. My boyfriend is great at fingering, but it’s not usually enough stimulation to get me off, so the vibrations are a welcome addition.

You can wear the little vibrators on your fingerpads for maximum power, or you can flip ‘em around to the backs of your fingers, so that your fingertips themselves will vibrate. I like that last way better, both when masturbating and when having my boyf use the toy on me. It just feels… cool.

My man feels very strongly that the Hello Touch messes up his fingering mojo. He says he can’t really feel what he’s doing when the vibrators are strapped to his fingers, both because of the physical presence of the vibrators and because his fingertips go numb within minutes. However, I never noticed his performance suffering from the Hello Touch getting in the way.

At $65, the Hello Touch is one of Jimmyjane’s cheaper offerings, but even that seems a bit steep for a one-speed fingertip vibrator. It offers some pleasant sensations and makes for fun partner play, but I don’t know if the pleasure it brings me is really worth that much.

Ask Girly Juice: Vibrator Recommendations

Kate Sloan

Anonymous asked: I’m writing to ask you to offer a suggestion that would have these attributes: cordless (preferably rechargeable), mostly clitoral, body-safe, variety of sensations and intensities, and design-conscious without breaking the bank. Thank you.

Okay, I think I can do that!

Lelo has a few that might work. The Mia 2 and Siri are both rechargeable, have a variety of modes and settings, and are not too pricey, particularly if you can find them on sale.

Vibratex makes the Mini Magic Wand, a rechargeable, multi-mode vibe that I haven’t tried but that gets pretty good reviews. I also know that masturbation guru Betty Dodson swears by the Mystic Wand, another massager-style vibe that has several different patterns and settings.

The We-Vibe Salsa and Tango might be on the upper end of your price range, but they are some of the best rechargeable clit vibes out there. Super rumbly, small, discreet, quiet, waterproof, and they have a few different modes.

If you want something that can also be inserted, the Fun Factory Little Paul is a good option (though, again, it might be at the top end of what you’re willing to spend if you’re on a budget). Fun Factory is known for its deep vibrations and adorable-looking toys.

Hope that helps!

Sharing the Sexy #17

Kate Sloan

• Here’s a rad article on how to stimulate the A-spot! (If you want my advice on this same topic, I suggest getting your hands on a Tantus Tsunami, my favorite A-spotting tool.)

• Original Plumbing, a publication produced by and for trans guys, is expanding their web presence and needs your help! (The perks for contributing include things like indie porn subscriptions, so… why the hell not?)

• Here’s a piece on luxury sex toys, including Jimmyjane’s latest offering, the Hello Touch. (What are your thoughts on fingertip vibrators? I have historically hated them but am willing to believe that Jimmyjane might change my mind on this.)

• Ever wondered how to share sex toys safely?

• Would you want your vulva to look like Barbie’s? Oy, ladies. Love all your parts!

• A monthly delivery of tampons, pads, and chocolate for just $15 per month? How sweet!

• Kendra is planning her first gangbang.

Review: Leaf Spirit

Kate Sloan

Leaf is a company that tries desperately to market their toys as eco-friendly. First of all, they’re green, which looks cute as hell but doesn’t actually change their ecological footprint as far as I’m aware. Secondly, they’re rechargeable… like many, many other toys out there. And thirdly, they have a couple of other nice environmentally-conscious touches, like post-consumer recycled packaging and a natural canvas storage bag. If you’re eco-conscious, these vibes might appeal to you, but there’s really not that much setting them apart from any other rechargeable vibrator.

The one I chose, the Leaf Spirit, has a divine shape, which is what drew me to it. It’s tiny, curves to fit easily against my vulval mound, and has a gently pointed tip that my clit loves. It’s the kind of vibe that works well for use during missionary-style sex, because it fits so perfectly between bodies.

Aside from that, though, there isn’t much to love about the Spirit. Its motor, in particular, is hugely disappointing to me. At its highest speed, I’d say it’s comparable with the middle speeds of the Lelo Siri or maybe the lowest speed of the We-Vibe Tango. Translation: this is not for clits-o’-steel or even clits-o’-calcite.

Don’t get me wrong – the vibrations of the Spirit are nice (not so buzzy as to be numbing, yay!), they’re just not quite strong enough for me. If you find yourself staying on the low-to-middling speeds of your current vibrator (assuming it’s not the Hitachi or the Wahl, of course) then you might enjoy Leaf toys. I was able to reach orgasm with my Spirit once, but it took a long time and I had to pair it with a great G-spot dildo, which wouldn’t have been necessary with a vibe of passable strength.

The way the Spirit’s speed-changing mechanism works is kind of cool, if perhaps foreign to most toy users. You press its one button once to turn it on, and then hold it down any time you want to turn up the power. At any time, you can press it once to turn it off. This can be frustrating if you’re extremely accustomed to a different system, but I found it wasn’t that hard to get used to.

The Spirit has the added benefits of being waterproof and quiet, though I have to qualify that even if those are important criteria for you, the We-Vibe Tango is still better.

At about $120 depending on the store, the Leaf Spirit is ridiculously overpriced for a toy that really doesn’t deliver in the vibrations department. But if your clit is ultra-sensitive and you dig the sweet green aesthetic of Leaf toys, you might not be as disappointed as I was.

Review: Power VIP

Kate Sloan

Little information is available on the internet about the Power VIP vibrator. I got mine for $13 in JT’s Stockroom’s clearance section, where it’s known as the “Power Oscillator” – obviously intended to evoke my all-time favorite sex toy, the Eroscillator.

The toy arrived in an excessively large box which contained only the base unit and four attachments – no instructions. I looked up the toy’s distributor, Miko Exoticwear, hoping to get some information from them about the product’s origins and uses, but apparently Miko closed in 2008. I guess this explains why the Power VIP is listed as discontinued on many sites, and has ended up in the Stockroom clearance bin.

If you know a little about sex toys, you probably know that the Eroscillator is unparalleled. I don’t mean that it’s necessarily the greatest toy in the world – some people just don’t like it and don’t understand what the hype is about – but that there is truly no other toy like it. A few companies have attempted to make similar oscillating toys (oscillations, unlike vibrations, don’t cause numbness and tend to feel deeper), but these competitors have been massive failures. Naturally, the Power VIP is no different.

First off, the attachments. The box the toy came in (which is my only source of information about this product, given the lack of an instruction manual) says that they are made of a “hygienic fully washable material.” I have to wonder if this copywriter thought the only criteria for being hygienic is being washable; this is obviously a dysfunctional criteria, as even a rabid raccoon could be considered “hygienic” by these standards.

The attachments smell like horse manure. They seem to be made of some sort of rubber but I’m not sure. The strangest thing, though, is that none of the attachments are purportedly designed to be used on the clitoris. One of them is a “tongue” made for “all-over body massage,” one is a “plug” made for “vaginal and anal stimulation,” one is a “breast stimulator with nipple cup,” and one is intended for the G-spot. Surely this toy was designed by a man, one who is so out of touch with female anatomy and the sex toy world that he managed to completely forget about the clit.

My favorite attachment is the “plug.” It’s cylindrical and has little nubs all over it. I like it because it stimulates my entire clitoral shaft, and it seems to conduct the vibrations the best.

Did I say “vibrations”? Yes, I did. There’s no evidence that this toy actually oscillates. But, to its credit, it doesn’t actually claim to be an oscillator – only JT’s Stockroom slapped that label on it. The VIP’s box calls the toy a vibrator, so don’t be too disappointed that that’s exactly what it is.

The vibrations are, surprisingly, passable. There are only two settings, high and low. Low is laughably weak, but high is actually a nice speed that can bring me to orgasm in just a few minutes, rumbly enough that it doesn’t leave me numb.

The VIP is rechargeable, so you can’t expect the power of a plug-in vibrator, but it’s okay for what it is. But speaking of rechargeability… The VIP has a green light which turns on when it’s charging, but never seems to turn off. Even when I charge the damn thing for over 12 hours, that light remains on, so I never know if the toy is done charging or not. Needless to say, this is aggravating.

What little promotional material I’ve been able to find online about the Power VIP has claimed that it can last for up to 90 minutes on a charge (45 minutes on the high setting, which is the one I use 99% of the time). It’s certainly not going to break any records for best battery life, but it holds its charge pretty well when not in use.

While the Power VIP isn’t the worst vibrator I’ve ever used, I’m pissed that it’s advertised as an “oscillator” when it obviously can’t even live up to my love, let alone actually oscillate. Let this be a lesson to you, as if you didn’t already know: the clearance bin isn’t a good place to find the next toy that’ll rock your world.