Have you ever met somebody so cool and sexy that you felt like, “I don’t even know if I could handle having sex with this person, but I sure want to try!”?
Yeah, that was me with the Wildolo Nut & Bolt No.1 dildo. And it worked out pretty damn well for me. Let’s talk about it.
Apparently Wildolo is a subsidiary of Hismith, makers of the bestselling Hismith sex machine – huh, small world! While perhaps best known for their fantasy dildos, Wildolo also makes more humanoid options – including the Nut & Bolt No.1, which they asked me to review.
It’s a silicone dildo that looks super realistic, aside from its uncommon dimensions (and the preternatural shininess of its dick skin). Described by Wildolo as “short, thick, and ruthless,” this dildo has an insertable length of 3.94″, and a diameter that tops out somewhere around 2.1″. (Wish I could be more exact, but I am in the midst of an international move and I already packed my tape measure 😂 Sex toy reviewer problems…) It’s relatively unusual to see a dildo this short and thick on the market. I enjoyed pairing it with fantasies about a giant who is considered to have a small penis amongst his own people, but whose dick is comically massive by human standards, and how that might affect him psychologically if we fucked. (Yes, my brain is strange. What of it?)
In addition to its impressive measurements, the Nut & Bolt No.1 also boasts a few other cool features: it has a sturdy suction-cup base (which also makes it anal-safe and harness-compatible), it vibrates, and its vibrations can be controlled remotely via the Wildolo app.
Damn, that’s a thick dick! I was worried about my ability to handle it, initially, because I’ve been so stressed/busy for the last couple of months that I’ve barely taken my pants off to masturbate, let alone used any penetrative toys… but with enough warm-up and wetness, I actually found this dildo not only comfortable, but immensely pleasurable. Its glossy silicone surface glides well when enough water-based lube is applied, its tip is slightly tapered for easier insertion, and it stretches me out gradually as I gently push it in. I’m nowhere near as much of a size queen as I was in my mid-twenties, but the girthiness of this dildo really hits the spot (so to speak) when I’m craving that sensation of being stretched and filled.
Speaking of “hitting the spot,” I was surprised that this Wildolo vibrating dildo manages to stimulate both my G-spot and my A-spot at once. It makes sense that it’s G-spotty: it’s got a pronounced coronal ridge that slides back and forth over that spot with every thrust, and its sizeable girth pretty much forces that ridge against your spot. (I assume it would stimulate a prostate similarly well.) But somehow, its upturned tip, though quite thick, can nudge at the periphery of my A-spot too, creating an all-around super-stimulating and satisfying sensation for me. There was even one quick-pulsing vibration pattern that reminded me of a partner rhythmically fingering my A-spot!
Because of its intense girth and G-spottiness, this dildo can make me squirt with very little effort on my part. In fact it pretty much guarantees that I will squirt when I come, even if I barely move the dildo at all during the lead-up. Neat!
I really like the balance Wildolo struck between hardness and softness with this silicone formulation. It feels realistically erection-like: squishy enough to bend with my body and remain comfortable throughout each thrust, but firm enough to be able to pound away when I need that. I also love that the silicone’s surface is glossy, because it makes for a smoother glide and means that my hands and arms don’t get as tired out when I thrust with this toy.
Downloading and installing the Wildolo app on my phone + connecting it to the toy took under a minute, total. The app itself, while a bit confusing and overstuffed with features (as sex toy apps often are), was also easy enough to pick up. I can control my own toy via the app, or invite a long-distance partner to do so. You get a lot of control over vibration intensity, can create your own patterns and try out other people’s creations, etc.
The suction-cup base is a nice touch. It allows you to use this toy hands-free if you want to, and also makes it anal-safe and harness-compatible. This is the kind of toy that makes me wish I had more mobility in my knees/hips so I could sit down on top of it and ride it, since that seems like the optimal way to use a dildo like this, ideally suction-cupped to a tile floor (or a big heavy hardcover book, if you’re in bed!).
The vibrations are pretty quiet, even at high speeds, as they’re significantly muted by the thick silicone (plus your own flesh, when in use). I don’t think this toy could be heard through a closed door. Gotta love a discreet dick!
I think $70 is a very fair price for this toy, given that some other realistic silicone dildos will run you 100+ and they often don’t even vibrate.
The vibration is, like… fine. It’s buzzy/high-pitched and not particularly strong, and there’s only 3 speeds followed by 7 patterns (although you can customize speeds/patterns much more precisely using the Wildolo app). I’m not the biggest fan of internal vibration anyway, but if you are, I think you’d probably prefer a toy with a rumblier/lower-pitched motor than this one.
Final thoughts
Call me a basic bitch if you must, but I like cock – and the Wildolo Nut & Bolt No.1 is a well-made, realistic silicone cock that stimulates my internal erogenous zones with aplomb, and leaves me dizzily breathless in a puddle of my own squirt. Is it perfect? No. But real cocks aren’t, either, and I can still come all over them.
On a personal note, this was the last review I had to get done before moving from Toronto to New York. (As I write this, I am surrounded by packed boxes and other detritus.) Initially I was annoyed with myself for procrastinating such that I needed to pause in the middle of packing to give this toy one final test and then write my review. But time and time again, I found myself feeling grateful that it was this toy, and not some shitty, annoying disappointment. This dildo actually felt worth fucking, even during such a chaotic week – and it even relieved some of my stress. Shout-out to Wildolo – I’m gonna go pack this toy, because it’s coming with me to New York for sure.
This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write an honest and fair review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.
When I interviewed 35 people about the legendary Magic Wand vibrator for my podcast miniseries about it, certain sentiments recurred again and again. For instance, people frequently described it as “dependable” and “reliable,” it was repeatedly compared to jackhammers and Cadillacs, and… you guessed it… almost everyone wished it was waterproof.
Some of them expressed this with a certain guilty reservation, like they felt “greedy” for wanting a famously ultra-powerful vibrator to also stand up to shower sex. How decadent, how maximalist, to imagine bringing earth-shattering power offshore with you into uncharted waters.
Well, guess what? I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to be greedy. It’s okay to be maximalist. It’s okay to want it all. Sometimes you’ll even get what you want – like when Vibratex heeds user feedback and actually makes a waterproof Magic Wand.
I’m not going to include the Magic Wand Mini or Magic Wand Micro in the table below, because they’re not on the same level power-wise. But here is a comparison table of all the full-size Magic Wands currently available:
It is indeed waterproof! Hurrah! This is worth rejoicing about. I am a bath aficionado and have been known to rub one out in the tub from time to time, and it’s sooo nice to be able to take a super-strong toy in there with me, instead of being relegated to whatever waterproof little clit vibe happens to be charged. (The We-Vibe Tango X is the best one, incase you’re wondering.) It’s also nice to be able to massage my neck and shoulders, etc. while lying in a warm bath, since the heat helps relax my muscles even further. Vibratex even made the buttons on the MWW slightly bigger, perhaps to make them easier to see underwater.
Okay, here’s the real bombshell: This is the MOST POWERFULMAGIC WAND that has EVER EXISTED. Yes, I’m caps-lock shouting at you, because if you take away nothing else from this review, it should be that. This vibrator’s amazingly strong motor might even be its primary selling point, moreso even than its being waterproof. As you can see in the comparison table above, the Magic Wand Original (MWO) tops out at 6,000 RPM, while the Magic Wand Rechargeable (MWR) and Magic Wand Plus (MWP) both go up to 6,300 RPM – but the Magic Wand Waterproof (MWW) has them all beat, maxing out at a whopping 7,000 RPM. Its lowest setting (2,700 RPM) is the same as the lowest setting of the MWR and MWP, but each of its 3 subsequent settings is more powerful than its equivalent in other Magic Wands, with the MWW’s 3rd speed (of 4) being the same as the highest speed of the Magic Wand Original. So, if you love wands but have found that your current Magic Wand doesn’t feel quite powerful enough, the Waterproof might be exactly the upgrade you need.
Relatedly: This wand is so strong that it’s given me a greater appreciation for how, contrary to popular belief, sometimes wands are a good pick for days when you’re feeling extra-sensitive, because you can hold them further away from your clit/cock/etc., use them through labia or through underwear, etc. and still feel the vibrations, because of how powerful they are. (JoEllen Notte has also written about this.) I find direct clit stim quite painful so I love how wands are so versatile in this way. When I come with a wand, usually it’s pressed against the side of my clit through two layers of labia and one or two layers of clothing – and even then, this wand feels wildly intense, which brings me to my next point…
Oh, the orgasms!! This thing gives me the type of orgasms that make me say “Oh my god” out loud while I’m coming, because the sensations are so unexpectedly strong. (Pretty rare for a professional sex toy reviewer of over 13 years to be surprised by how her own orgasms feel!) Sometimes those orgasms have an element of discomfort or overstimulation to them, as I’ll discuss further below – but the strength of these vibrations, and the Magic Wand’s signature blend of rumbliness with a topcoat of buzz, makes these orgasms awe-inspiring.
As with all Magic Wand products, this one feels solidly constructed and well-engineered, its buttons respond quickly and reliably, and it’s overall the sex toy equivalent of a great friend who always keeps their promises.
My biggest issue with the MWW is one of personal taste: it’s a bit too strong for me! The jumps between speeds sometimes feel jarring, partly just because I’m so accustomed to using my MWR instead – but there were several MWW testing sessions where eventually the first speed felt too weak but the second speed felt too strong, and I eventually gave up and switched back to my MWR because its second speed is slightly weaker than the MWW’s (3800 RPMs versus 4200) and thus more enjoyable to me. When I did use the MWW “to completion,” it often left my vulva feeling a bit overstimulated and achy afterward, in the way that ultra-strong vibration tends to.
While the official Magic Wand website says that both the MWW and the MWR weigh 1.3 lbs, the MWW feels heavier to me somehow, and my arm gets tired/sore more quickly from holding it. It’s possible that the weight is just distributed differently within the toy (more top-heavy, perhaps?) but in any case, I find the MWW slightly unwieldy compared to the MWR.
The blue rubbery cap that fits over the charging port, which presumably is one of the things that makes it waterproof (since the manual warns that the cap must always be on when the MWW is in water), is not attached to the wand itself in any way, and would therefore be easy to drop/lose. I’m not sure what Vibratex would do in that event – some sex toy companies sell individual replacements for parts that are easily misplaced, for instance – but I wish that the problem had been avoided altogether by having the cap be attached to the body of the wand.
Unlike the MWR, the MWW cannot be used while charging. This is rarely an issue, especially since the MWW lasts about 2.5 hours on a full charge, but I’ve always liked that when the MWR dies, you can literally just plug it in and keep using it. It guarantees that you’re never left in the lurch, and so I wish every other vibe could have that feature, including the MWW. (Obviously you still wouldn’t be able to use it in water while it’s charging…)
Like the MWR before it, the MWW shuts off automatically after 20 minutes of use, to prevent overheating. (You can turn it back on again immediately.) I don’t usually encounter this because I take frequent breaks where I turn the vibe off for a few seconds to manage genital overstimulation throughout a session, but it’s pretty annoying to have to worry about it at all.
The MWW is the most expensive product in the Magic Wand lineup, at $200. I imagine this has something to do with the Trump tariffs (sigh). It’s not as pricey as the upscale Doxy Die Cast wand ($215), but it’s also not as powerful (the Die Cast maxes out at 9000 RPM versus the MWW’s 7000). That being said, the MWW does bring value to the table that’ll make it worth the high price for some users, namely its waterproofness and its added motor strength.
I’m sure there are valid engineering-related reasons this cannot be, but I wish the MWW and MWR used the same charger, just for convenience’s sake. Alas, they do not.
Final thoughts
I’m thrilled to have a Magic Wand Waterproof in my collection, particularly for those times when I’m craving a bathtub wank and don’t want to have to compromise on power. It didn’t end up being my personal favorite product in the Magic Wand lineup, though; that title is still held by the legendary Magic Wand Rechargeable, because I’m sensitive enough that the MWW’s jumps in power felt too big for my delicate, picky clit. I also love being able to use the MWR while it’s charging, so it never gives up the ghost mid-session, a feature that the MWW lacks.
But I think a lot of people will absolutely love the MWW. It opens up entirely new avenues of play, both because it’s waterproof and because it’s even stronger than its predecessors. Diehard Magic Wand devotees will enjoy the added power and versatility – although I’m not sure I’d recommend the MWW as a gateway for a first-time wand user, because of how strong it is.
Overall, though? Look. It’s been a tough year so far, to say the fucking least. Global slide into fascism. Queer and trans people existentially threatened. Climate change lapping at our heels. And on and on.
So when something actually good happens these days, I feel it’s my responsibility to shout it from the top of a mountain… [Ron Burgundy voice] but I don’t have a mountain; I have a sex blog, and so it is here that I must say to you: the Magic Wand Waterproof exists, and it is good. It’s the most powerful Magic Wand that’s ever been made. It is the answer to our vibrator prayers. Good things still can happen in this godforsaken world. 🪄
This post was NOT sponsored and I was NOT required to review this product, although Vibratex did kindly send me a pre-release sample to test. Yes, I am #blessed.
Every time I review a sex toy, I start by reading its instruction manual cover-to-cover – and one of the funniest parts of the manual is often the verbs that the sex toy company has chosen to express what its toy’s various functions do. I’ve seen everything from “slapping” to “squeezing” to “tickling”… and in this way, the XReverie Rilva rabbit vibrator stood out from the crowd, because it offers “digging” and “swelling.” What the hell does that mean? Let’s find out together, shall we?!
Like most rabbit vibrators, this one has an internal arm that’s meant to be used vaginally, and an external arm that’s meant to be used clitorally.
In this case, the internal arm has a couple of different functions:
The tip of the shaft strokes up and down in a “come hither” motion meant to stimulate the A-spot. (Yes, they specifically reference the A-spot in their product copy! Yay, more A-spot awareness!) Identified by XReverie as “digging,” I would moreso call this “stroking” or “massaging.”
The middle of the shaft rhythmically undulates, expanding and contracting, or as XReverie calls it, “swelling.” It’s meant to stimulate the G-spot, and in practice, I’d say it feels more like light tapping against that area.
The external/clitoral arm of the toy is more straightforward – it just vibrates – but its shape is non-standard for a rabbit; it reminds me of a seal balancing a ball on its nose.
The Rilva is made of silicone and ABS plastic, and it currently retails for $54.99 USD. It lasts about 50 minutes on a 90-minute charge.
I’m always thrilled to see new toys coming out that target the A-spot specifically, and this one does a decent job of it! The tip of its shaft feels very similar to a partner stroking my spot with one or two fingers – which is my jam, man, as practically anyone I’ve ever fucked could tell you. There are 3 steady stroking speeds followed by some more erratic patterns; I liked that the steady speeds started relatively slow, instead of jackhammery (I often find myself saying “Slower, please!!” when partners are fingerbanging me). It’s a stroking motion, not a thrusting motion, but the sensation reminded me a lot of Fun Factory Stronic toys (RIP), in the way it hit my spot rhythmically again and again.
I dig that the internal and external arm can be controlled separately from one another, each with their own button. You can also pause one of the arms by double-clicking its button, if (for example) the clitoral vibrations start to overwhelm you and you want to focus on internal sensations for a while.
The Rilva comes with a lovely velvety storage bag… which is especially important because its soft matte silicone is very prone to picking up lint/dirt/etc.
It’s IPX6 water-resistant, meaning you can wash it in the sink or take it in the shower, but shouldn’t submerge it.
Unfortunately the biggest issue with this toy is that its stroking function slows down under pressure. Even just the minor vaginal squeezing I do during mild-to-moderate arousal was enough to hinder its motion significantly – which was a bummer, because the stroking felt amazing until then! IMO, if you’re designing a toy for vaginal use, it should be able to withstand some basic Kegel flexing without buckling under the pressure.
The shaft of the toy also starts to overheat after a few minutes, especially if you’re putting extra pressure on the motor, by, uh, [checks notes] becoming sexually aroused while it’s inside you. It never got hot enough to hurt me or anything, but it was still unsettling.
The clitoral arm is fairly useless for me: its vibrations are irritatingly buzzy (albeit surprisingly strong, especially on the high end) and its shape inevitably focuses those vibrations onto the hypersensitive tip of my clit, rather than the clitoral shaft or hood. Some people would enjoy this laser-focused intensity, but I sure ain’t one of ’em.
I don’t know why soooo many toys I’m reviewing here lately have had 3 steady speeds followed by 7 patterns, but I’m tired of it!! Give us more steady speeds and fewer patterns!! Both the internal and external arms of the Rilva have this issue.
I can’t even really comment on the part of the shaft that “swells” against the G-spot, because I barely felt it. It’s inventive, though!
The Rilva is kinda loud, although that’s normal with mechanical stroking toys like this one.
Final thoughts
Wish I liked this toy more, but alas, the XReverie Rilka rabbit vibe has some significant mechanical issues, including its tendency to slow down under any pressure, its troubling habit of overheating, and its gratingly buzzy motor.
But I hope more sex toy companies (including XReverie!) keep making A-spot-focused toys, because this spot deserves more love. As in, the kind of love that doesn’t slow to a crawl the minute you get turned on.
This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.
As I strolled back home from a great comedy show last night, I had a spring in my step. I’d just shared some laughs with pals, the weather was beautiful, and I had a date with a sex doll.
This date was a long time coming. I’ve collaborated with sex doll company Tantaly on a number of reviews before, but I’ve always outsourced the testing, because the brand always wanted to highlight their most popular products: dolls with tits and a pussy. Now, don’t get me wrong, I can appreciate tits and a pussy as much as the next bisexual – but I don’t have the anatomy required to actually fuck that type of doll, which is, of course, the expected usage of a fuck-doll.
In the course of doing those Tantaly reviews, I’ve managed to hook up three penis-possessing people in my life with a free sex doll, in exchange for letting me pick their brain about the experience for my review (or in one case, the person actually wrote the review himself – you should read it, it’s hilarious!). But sex dolls are the type of product that you typically wouldn’t want or need multiples of, especially if you live in a small apartment – so none of my testers were willing to test another doll, and there wasn’t really anyone else who I’d trust enough to give this responsibility to. (It might sound odd to describe sticking your dick in something as a “responsibility,” but my reputation and income would legitimately be on the line if a tester ghosted me after receiving their doll, so I have to be choosy about them!)
All this to say: When Tantaly reached out again recently to ask about another collab, I told them that at this point, I’d only be able to review a doll if I could test it myself… which meant it would have to be a doll with a dick. And guess what? They sent me one. His name is Mark. He’s actually lying in my bed right now as I write this. He’d probably be smoking a post-coital cigarette, if not for the fact that he has no head. Let me tell you about our date night!
Specs ‘n’ stuff
I want to get the technical shit out of the way up top, because frankly it feels weird to write about this doll like it’s just another sex toy, even though it literally is. But damn, it’s eerily humanoid. I mean, I know that’s the point, but I was really thrown by how much my brain wanted to categorize the doll as a person immediately. I full-body cringed from uncanny-valley weirdness when I unboxed Mark and looked at him lying there, so lifeless and subdued – except for his perpetually raging hard-on, which arched up out of his styrofoam coffin like a phoenix rising from the ashes – and yet so lifelike. I kept saying “Excuse me, sir” as I (wo)manhandled him into different positions, the same way I sometimes catch myself saying “Please” and “Thank you” to Siri. (You can take the girl out of Canada, but…)
The Mark doll is lifelike but not exactly life-sized; even accounting for its lack of a head/arms/legs, it’s still proportionately maybe two-thirds the size of your average dude. It’s 23.5″ tall, from its cut-off neck to the bottom of its cut-off thighs. But I would say that the doll’s most impactful measurement is actually its weight, because hoo boy is this thing ever heavy (33.7 lbs). To be fair, I have a chronic illness that impacts muscle strength, and I’m also just an out-of-shape weakling, but weight is a frequent complaint about sex dolls in general, even for people with actual muscle. These dolls do require a certain amount of heft so they can stay anchored in place when you’re fucking them/riding them – and they do that very well! – but I found it challenging to move the doll around at all. In fact, after coming, I was so tired that I barely managed to shove the doll over in bed so I could fall asleep beside him (and yes, it was a bit of a jump-scare waking up next to a headless man the next morning).
The Mark comes with a storage case, which has straps to make it easier to carry around – nice touch! There’s even a zippered pocket on the outside which is very roomy – you could easily fit a Magic Wand Rechargeable, big dildo, and full-size bottle of lube in there, no problem, with room left over for condoms or cock rings or whatever else you’re bringing to the hypothetical sex doll orgy you’re apparently jetsetting to in this scenario.
Except for its metal frame structure, the entire doll is made of TPE (thermoplastic elastomer), which has some big pros and some big cons that I’ll get into below. This doll costs $400 USD or $500 CAD. In addition to its lovely dick, it also has a fuckable ass with a textured interior; the doll comes with a moisture-absorbing stick to help speed up the drying process after you wash his butt out (what a phrase!), but as mentioned, I don’t have a dick with which to penetrate this thing, so I didn’t test out its butt beyond giving it a little slap or two, ’cause, y’know, when in Rome…
Too real, man
I’d never personally unboxed a torso before. I’d seen other people unbox them, in videos and on FaceTime calls, but it’s an odd experience to actually do it yourself. I was laughing, cringing and squealing as I lifted Mark out of the little styrofoam bed he came in – because he looked and felt somehow both very real and not real at all.
Certainly his physique doesn’t resemble many that I’ve seen in the wild, but the texture and appearance of his skin is quite lifelike, if a bit unnaturally cold to the touch. (Just imagine you’re fucking one of the Twilight vampires, it’s fine.) One nice thing about TPE is that it can indeed feel impressively skin-like on the surface – but this TPE formulation feels oddly soft for this particular application. Truly not trying to body-shame here, only to doll-shame, but in my limited experience touching super-muscly bodies like Mark‘s, they are quite a bit firmer than this. It’s especially strange in the chest region; I’m used to being able to leverage some of my weight against someone’s chest as I ride them, but my fist sinks into Mark like memory foam, which was a tad bit unsettling mid-bang.
But overall, it was an interesting experience for me psychologically to get my hands all over this doll, objectifying him, flipping him over, touching his junk, etc. It made me really aware of how inhibited I feel when touching human partners – there’s the constant anxiety, however low-level, that I might do a bad job, hurt them somehow, or look like I don’t know what I’m doing. I didn’t have to worry about any of that with the doll, so I was able to follow my in-the-moment desires without hesitation, tweaking a nipple here, smacking some balls there, running a palm along Mark‘s rubbery six-pack, and just basically being an unabashed perv. This ultra-toned body type isn’t what I’m usually drawn to – if Tantaly ever makes a sex doll with a lanky nerd bod or a cuddly dad bod, I’m so there – but I enjoyed the way it encouraged me to foreground my desires and my “female gaze,” like a Magic Mike movie.
Does yr girl know how to shoot a cock portrait or what?
Cock ‘n’ balls
Shout-out to those of you who scrolled down to this section immediately; I see you 😉
As you might imagine, this doll’s dick is spectacular, at least visually. (My wife didn’t think so, though; she took one look at it and immediately said, “What a weird dick! And the rest of him just looks like a woman!” – which I hadn’t really considered, but I guess Mark‘s pecs, nipples, and hourglassy shape have a certain Greek-statue-esque androgyny to them that probably makes this an especially suitable doll for me, a noted bisexual…)
But let’s get down to brass tacks: cock measurements. The insertable length is slightly over 6″, while its widest circumference is 5.75″, which works out to a diameter of about 1.8″. (And yes, I reflexively apologized to him out loud as I held a tape measure to his dick.)
Tantaly has done something similar here to what companies like Vixen Creations and Tantus do with dual-density silicone: this cock has a firm core, with a squishier outer layer on top, to create a realistically boner-like feeling. But in Mark‘s case, the firm core is part of the doll’s metal frame structure, and the outer layer is the same soft TPE that the rest of the doll is made out of.
And therein lies the rub (and tug): TPE is not the right material for this dick (or for any dick, frankly). It should be made out of silicone instead (like that of the Tantaly Mark Pro doll, of which more below). TPE is porous, meaning it clings onto some amount of bacteria no matter how well you wash it. So, while I really enjoyed sucking Mark’s cock for a while (after taking a damp washcloth to it, to wipe away any bitter chemicals remaining from the production process), I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing so anymore after he’d been used a few times, because the thought of the bacteria would gross me out. I likewise wouldn’t be able to sanitize his dick if, for instance, I wanted to use it anally and then vaginally, or wanted to share it with a partner I’m not fluid-bonded with, or wanted to avoid re-infecting myself after a bout of BV. I could put a new condom on it every time, sure, but it’d be annoying to have to do that, especially with such an expensive toy.
There’s another reason I wish Mark’s dick wasn’t made of TPE: it’s too soft! Now, look, this is a body-positive blog, and I certainly don’t mean to boner-shame… but in real life, if someone is having erectile difficulties, we can just switch to activities that don’t require a hard-on. This doll has no such capacity – he has no tongue, no fingers, no purple vibrating strap-on – and so, let’s face it, his dick is what he brings to the table. As such, it surprised me that his cock is so soft and squishy that it’s actually difficult to get it inside me, in a way that reminds me of that old Rodney Dangerfield joke about “shooting pool with a rope.”
I also just… couldn’t feel his dick very strongly as I was riding it, despite its moderate size, A-spotty curve, and firm core. I wanted to feel well-and-truly fucked, but it felt more like my insides were being gently massaged – nice, sure, but not orgasmic. I ended up nudging the doll aside in bed so I could lie down and get myself off “the old-fashioned way,” i.e. with a dildo and vibe. (I have, of course, linked to the actual toys I actually used, because I know I would be curious about that if I was reading this!)
All hope is not lost, however: Tantaly also makes a doll called the Mark Pro, which comes with three differently-sized removable silicone penises (!!!), making it not only more hygienic but also more versatile. The jump in price between the Mark and Mark Pro is $90 USD, which buys you three nice silicone dildos and some peace of mind, at the very least, so I’d say it’s worth it!
Regarding my own doll’s all-TPE genitals, though, one upside is that his balls look and feel very realistic, in a way that I found hot and weirdly transfixing… probably because I have often been wary of hurting partners’ balls if I touch them too zealously, so it was a fun novelty to be able to slap some balls around without fear of causing pain or permanent damage.
Sir, this is a Wendy’s
Was it good for you?
“Cowgirl” position (i.e. me on top) was the only one that seemed practical for my purposes. Mark is too heavy for me to comfortably place him on top of me in a missionary-style position, I’m not flexible enough for many other positions, and the very idea of backing up onto a doll’s dick in doggie-style is giving me pre-emptive thigh cramps just thinking about it.
Cowgirl isn’t a position I tend to favor in my sex life, because I lack the strength in my knees and hips to really accomplish the up-and-down motion that people with penises tend to prefer. But I’m much more able to sustain a smaller range of motion that, were I to do it with a human, would probably be more for my own pleasure than theirs, rubbing the head of their dick back and forth over my A-spot in short strokes and maybe grinding my clit against their pubic bone at the same time. Naturally, though, with a sex doll I was able to fully prioritize my own pleasure without having to consider what might feel best for someone else, and it was fun to experiment with different ways to ride a cock. (If PETA wants to update the “ways to skin a cat” idiom, I nominate that as a contender.)
Although it was fun to center my own pleasure in the way I rode the insensate Mark, my arousal only really kicked into gear once I started imagining he could feel pleasure, could experience desire and arousal and frenzied lust. I fantasized that the doll awoke into sentience (let’s disregard its horrifying headlessness for the purposes of this scenario) and discovered, to its surprise, that a cute gal (hi) was riding its dick, and that this was intensely pleasurable. I’ve employed similar fantasies in toy-testing sessions before, usually imagining that a dildo I’m testing has become sentient and sensate – but Mark’s humanoid torso added significantly to this fantasy for me. It was like an adult version of Pinocchio’s “I’m a real boy” moment… Peen-occhio? Is that anything?
Ultimately though, I was not able to reach orgasm with Mark, even when I used an ol’ faithful clit vibe while riding him. His dick just didn’t feel hard enough to contribute meaningfully to my pleasure – which annoyed me, because you literally had one job, dude. If Mark was a Ken doll, his job would be dick. But I’m not sure he’s a great fit for the position.
Nonetheless: Man oh man, I had so much fun testing out the Tantaly Mark. It’s definitely the most humanoid product I’ve ever reviewed in my 13+ years in this industry, and it was fascinating to observe how that affected my arousal, my fantasies, and even the way I addressed the doll in my own mind (he/it pronouns, baybee!).
I think a lot of people would really enjoy this doll, especially if they plan on making use of his ass in ways that I could not, so as to get their full money’s worth. As for me, call me shallow, but the dick was all I cared about – and it just wasn’t firm enough to give me the ramming I wanted, plus it’s made of a porous material. [sad trombone]
The Mark Pro is a really cool product, though, because it’s Mark with a dick you can detach and sanitize as needed. I haven’t felt its dick(s) myself, so I don’t know how the firmness compares to the TPE version – but if it was firmer, I think I’d have a much easier time coming all over it. And just think: If I found myself saying “Sorry” and “Excuse me” while just moving him around, I wonder what I’d say to him in the throes of an orgasm…
This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.
When mega-popular sex toy company Lovense asked me to review their Ferri panty vibe recently, I thought, Wait… Haven’t I already reviewed that?! – but apparently I have not! I have written about it countless times for various publications, though, because I’ve adored it for years – so I was glad to have the opportunity to tell you about it in more detail here!
Spoiler alert: this is one of those very rare reviews where I have almost nothing negative to say at all about the product. As they say in showbiz: “No notes!”
Gratuitous underwear pics for some reason; you’re welcome
Ever wanted to use a vibrator secretly in public, while someone else controls it from their phone? I certainly have! Many sex toy companies have attempted to make a hands-free vibrator for this type of use-case. This is perhaps one of the most difficult types of vibrators to design and engineer (at least, that would be my educated guess as a critic-but-not-maker of sex toys), because they have to be comfortable, stable once situated, quiet, and easy to control surreptitiously (usually via a smartphone app or an included remote) – not to mention, powerful and pleasurable!
Some of these toys require some degree of penetration, like We-Vibe-style toys or Lovense’s own Lush. Personally, I tend to prefer an option that’s all external and doesn’t require any penetration – not only because clitoral stimulation is what gives me most of my pleasure anyway, but also because my vag will eventually start to get sore if I keep something inside there while I’m sitting, walking around, etc. for hours on end, even if I slip away to a bathroom to re-lube periodically.
The Ferri solves this problem neatly. It’s a small vibrator that you tuck into your panties (or any other close-fitting style of underwear); it’s contoured to cup the vulva beautifully, curving along the mons and onto the clit. (Folks with penises seeking a vibe for hands-free use might consider the Gush.) Most cleverly, a separate magnet comes with the Ferri, which you can affix to the outside of your underwear, holding the vibe in place. You can then control the vibe via Bluetooth using the Lovense app (available for iOS, Android, Mac, and PC). While the Ferri obviously doesn’t have to be used in public, that is where it shines, and where the cleverness of its many features becomes most evident. Let’s talk about ’em…
The Lovense app is just so fucking cool, and so well-designed. I praise it every time I review a Lovense toy, because it really is that good – and it’s the reason I always recommend Lovense products when people ask me about long-distance sex toys. In the app, you can use sliders to precisely control your vibe yourself, or invite someone else to control it from near or far; you can craft your own vibration patterns, loop them, or try out patterns that other people have designed; you can make your vibe vary based on the music/sound levels in the room you’re in, or respond in real-time to interactive videos or video games; you can even set an alarm and get woken up by vibration. Other companies have attempted to do what Lovense is doing, but none so effectively (at least none that I’ve tried), not only because their app is so robustly designed but also because their toys’ connectivity is way more consistent than that of other brands.
The vibrations are sufficiently rumbly, with a wide range of intensities that get plenty strong enough for me on the high end. In my view, a vibrator has to be rumbly to be successful in a public teasing scene, because you’re typically going to keep the vibrator in exactly the same spot for several minutes at a time, and buzzier vibrations would just numb you out – whereas rumbly ones continue to feel pleasurable for way longer. I think I could actually get off with this vibe in public, if not for my pesky social anxiety – but I can definitely get off with it in private, especially with the addition of some kind of rhythm or pressure from squeezing my thighs together (or having someone grind their thigh against my vulva…).
The Ferri is shaped excellently to target my clit, and I imagine many other people’s clits as well. Its gentle curve presses into my clit easily, and its ribbed texture gives me something to grind against if I rock back and forth slightly in my seat (water-based or oil-based lube makes this more pleasurable).
The magnet is really, really strong, so the vibe stays affixed to my underwear even as I walk around. On the rare occasions when it loses contact with my clit, it’s always because my underwear itself has shifted, not because the vibe has – and it’s easy to surreptitiously nudge it back into place under the table if I’m sitting at a restaurant or bar.
While I wouldn’t call it silent by any means, the Ferri is a pretty quiet vibrator, and it likely wouldn’t be audible at all in a noisy public environment like a bar or club. Just be careful when you sit down on a hard surface, like a metal chair or wooden barstool; the vibe might clatter against it, depending on how you’re sitting.
The Ferri lasts an impressive 3 hours and 15 minutes on an hour-long charge. On standby mode (i.e. connected to your phone via Bluetooth, but not vibrating yet), the Ferri can last up to 100 hours. I particularly appreciate long battery lives and short charging times when it comes to public-play toys, because you might impulsively decide to grab one as you dash out the door for a dinner date, and it sucks to discover that it’s dead. Even if it is dead, you can plug it in for a few minutes while you brush your teeth, get dressed, etc. and it’ll have enough juice for an evening tryst by the time you’re ready to go.
It’s waterproof, which makes it super easy to clean… and also means that you can keep on vibin’ even if you get caught in a torrential downpour on your way home from dinner. Alleyway makeout in the rain while a vibe pulses in your panties, anyone?
The only complaint I have about this toy is that the Lovense app randomly logs me out of my account more often than I’d prefer (maybe like once every 2-3 months), which sometimes leads to an annoying horny scramble to find my login information when I really just want to get off (or let someone else get me off). Not sure what causes this, but even my app-developer wife gets annoyed by it, so it’s gotta be fixable, right?!
Final thoughts
A while ago, a friend texted me asking for sex toy advice. He wanted to buy his partner a panty vibe, had a few options in mind, and wanted my opinion on which was best. Without hesitation, I said, “Just get the Lovense Ferri.”
I really do think it’s the best panty vibe on the market right now, and I say that as someone who used to be a hater about the entire panty-vibe genre. This vibe actually gets it right, and has shown me that surreptitious public scenes can be fun, hot, and easy – rather than being a technological nightmare where you lose your boner from frustration after the third time you have to reconnect the Bluetooth!
It’s not often that I feel like doing a scene in public, but when I do, I tend to reach for either one of my Njoy Pure Plugs, an Uberrime vaginal plug, or the Lovense Ferri. They never let me down!
This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the product. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.
