Review: Le Stelle Perks EX-C

I’m always on board with new luxury sex toy companies popping up to fill the shoes of Lelo and Jimmyjane, now that those brands have well and truly jumped the shark. So I was excited when Le Stelle reached out to offer me a vibrator to try.

I chose the Perks Series Ex-C – and no, I’m not sure why it’s called that. It’s a rechargeable vibrator in a lovely shade of cornflower blue, and it comes with two interchangeable attachments: one for external/clitoral use, and one for dual stimulation (G-spot + clit at the same time).

Switching the attachments out is easy – you twist one counterclockwise to remove it, and twist the new one clockwise to lock it in place. They’re both made of smooth, matte silicone that feels luxurious to the touch. The attachments feel fancier than the plastic vibrating base, which is lightweight and doesn’t feel as substantial, but they look pretty together.

The clitoral attachment, I will admit, did next-to-nothing for me. The vibrations are buzzier than my clit prefers, making my genitals start to get numb and my hand start to get itchy within a minute or so. They also start too high for me – I like a lot of gradation in my vibrator speeds – and there are only 3 steady speeds before you start cycling through the 7 patterns. Scrolling through modes with only one button is annoying as hell, but Le Stelle is hardly the first company to use this system – my beloved We-Vibe does it too – so I can hardly fault them for that. The clit attachment is also bendy/squishy/flexible, so if you like any pressure whatsoever on your clit, you’ll have a hard time using this. And as icing on the cake, the vibrations this toy produces are loud – think mini-buzzsaw – even though its marketing copy says it’s “discreet and quiet.” Nope.

With all that in mind, I was ready to write this vibe off, but then I tried the dual-stimulation attachment. It’s got a big swollen G-spot head, a slim tapered shaft, and a little ridged nub that’s supposed to sit on your clit. I found, to my surprise, that this attachment works really well for my body: it lines up just right with both my G-spot and clit at the same time, which is a feat in itself, and it strikes a good balance between firmness and squishiness and between broadness and slimness for my particular G-spot. The buzzy vibrations feel less annoying when they’re inside; my G-spot evidently likes buzziness more than my clit does, because I was actually able to squirt with this toy by thrusting it while the vibrations were on. Neat!

The clitoral nubbin stays in place pretty well when I leave the vibe still, but, as I mentioned, these vibrations aren’t my clit’s favorite. It tends to go numb after a little while, and I can’t imagine getting off with this vibe alone. Luckily, though, the attachment is flexible enough that I can bend it backwards a little, to keep the internal portion in contact with my G-spot while freeing up some space in front of my clit for my hand or another vibe. Using the Perks Ex-C this way, orgasm is possible – and often quite intense, with all that G-spot pressure and vibration going on.

While this attachment looks like it might be anal-safe, I wouldn’t recommend using it that way – I’d be too scared the attachment would pop off and get lost inside you. A reader on Instagram also reported to me that they owned the anal-friendly version of this toy and it broke while they were switching the attachment, exposing the wires underneath. If that’s anything to go on (which it might not be – I haven’t confirmed this case and I don’t know if it’s a one-off or not), these vibes might not be the most durable, and they’re only splash-proof, not waterproof, so I wouldn’t trust these for particularly strenuous or wet sessions.

That said, for $69.90 (nice), I think the Le Stelle Perks Ex-C is a pretty decent G-spot vibrator, if nothing else. I have a hard time finding toys that don’t make my G-spot want to curl up and die, and this pleased it better than anything new I’ve tried in quite a while. Plus it’s pretty, and I’m a sucker for a good blue.

 

Thanks so much to Le Stelle for providing this toy for me to review! This post was sponsored, and as always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Reviews: FemmeFunn Diamond Wand + Bunny Massager

I’ve never been much for aesthetics when it comes to my sex toys. The way I see it, if all I’m doing with an object is shoving it inside me or holding it on my clit while I stare at porn or my partner, then who really cares what it looks like?

But of course, that view is reductive, and doesn’t take into account the broad range of ways sex toys’ aesthetics can feel affirming or exciting to their users. Just because I don’t look at my sex toys during use doesn’t mean nobody does. A toy that feels in line with your gender presentation and ideal aesthetic can take a sexual experience from good to delightful. That’s part of why I’m so glad FemmeFunn exists.

FemmeFunn makes – as their name suggests – whimsical, feminine-looking sex toys. While there’s some debate about whether femme means feminine and whether a sex toy can, in fact, be femme, I have sometimes felt my femme identity being affirmed by toys like these. Not all of this company’s products are super girly – they have a range of realistic cocks and some masculine-coded butt toys – but girliness is what they’re known for and it’s what they do best.

I requested two toys from their line: the insertable Diamond Wand and the clitorally-focused Bunny Massager. Let’s get into it, shall we?

It’s easier for me to talk about the Bunny Massager because my opinion on it is simple: I’m not a fan. I’d hoped I would like it because I’ve previously liked other two-pronged clitoral vibes, like the We-Vibe Gala and Jimmyjane Form 2. I like the way they wrap around the clitoral shaft rather than attacking the head of the clit like so many vibes do. It often makes them a better option for those of us with hypersensitive clits that protest when touched too directly.

This bunny’s flexible ears are optimally shaped and spaced for this type of stimulation: my clit fits comfortably between them, and their soft oval shape lets them stimulate both my clitoral shaft and the internal portions of my clit with aplomb. Or rather, it would, if this toy’s vibrations were rumbly at all.

But alas – this toy is buzzy as fuck. There’s very little gradation in intensity between the 7 different speeds and patterns, so it starts too strong and just gets stronger. The high-pitched, surface-level vibrations just annoy my clit and make it feel battered by sensation. I could get off with this toy, maybe, but it would take forever and wouldn’t even feel good, so what’s the point?

The Diamond Wand, by comparison, is a dream. Its bigger motor is rumblier, though still probably too buzzy to satisfy devotees of the Tango or Mona. Despite its name, it’s not a wand in the traditional sense – it isn’t Hitachi-sized or designed solely for external stimulation – but it does serve up power the likes of which I’d expect from a wand. My friend JoEllen even liked it, and she usually favors big-ass wands like the Doxy.

The Diamond Wand’s shape makes it useable either clitorally or vaginally (but not anally – no flared base), and I’ve enjoyed it both ways. Inserted, it lacks the curve it would need to please my G-spot or A-spot, but its vibrations are powerful enough that it still quakes those zones indirectly. Used externally, its pointed tip, bulbous head, and textured shaft all seem to conduct the vibrations equally well, so you can position it however feels best for you. It’s also got a fair amount of flexibility to it, which, as JoEllen points out, allows it to “wrap” around the body a bit, so you can stimulate, for example, the labia and vaginal opening at the same time.

Like the Bunny Massager, the Diamond Wand has very little variation in intensity between its many speeds and patterns – but it’s less of an issue with this toy because I can move it to different spots of my vulva more easily if I want to mitigate the sensation. The most annoying thing about this vibe, which is true of the Bunny Massager too, is that you have to scroll through all the modes using only one button. A single-button system is fine if your toy only has a few modes, but the Diamond Wand has twenty-one. Yes, that’s right: if you get overstimulated on a high vibration setting and want to get back to a lower one, you have to click a button about twenty times. I am someone for whom moment-to-moment shifts in vibration strength can make or break an orgasm, so this is a huge drawback for me and is the main thing keeping this toy from achieving top-drawer status.

So what’s my final verdict? At $74.99, the Bunny Massager is way pricier than a cheap watch-battery bullet and will numb you out just as badly, so you might as well not bother. FemmeFunn’s bestselling Ultra Bullet is much rumblier and only costs $69.99 (nice). The Diamond Wand is $89.99, and I think that’s a fair price for this versatile, vivacious vibrator – though if you tend to decrease and increase vibration speed a lot when you use vibes, you’d be better off with something that has more than one button, like the Lelo Gigi 2 or Jimmyjane Iconic Wand.

While these toys haven’t made their way into my top drawer, they do look nice on my nightstand. I’m pretty sure no object has ever distilled my gender identity quite like FemmeFunn’s bright pink and turquoise vibrators.

 

Thanks so much to FemmeFunn for sending me these products to try! This review was sponsored. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Mini Reviews: We-Vibe Gala, FemmeFunn Ultra Bullet, & Sensuelle Point

My “toys to review” pile runneth over at the moment, so I thought I’d bunch a few together… Here are 3 clitoral vibes I have some Opinions about!

We-Vibe Gala (available at SheVibe)

We-Vibe sent me this at my request, because, from the moment I saw it, I desperately wanted it on my clit. It has a two-pronged, bunny-ears-esque shape reminiscent of the Jimmyjane Form 2, which I liked, as a person with a very sensitive clit that can’t handle direct stimulation most of the time. Having the option to surround my clit with vibration, rather than attack it head-on, always piques my interest.

I will say, it’s weird that the famously litigious We-Vibe blatantly ripped off a toy design from Jimmyjane. You would think they’d have picked up some anti-plagiarism scruples at some point while they were suing other companies for stealing their innovative couples’ toy design. But I digress…

I like the Gala’s motor better than the Form 2’s; it’s rumblier and stronger, but not by much. We-Vibe didn’t use their mind-blowing Tango motor in this toy, as far as I can tell, and that seems like a mistake: the sides and shaft of my clit appreciate rumbly vibration even more than the head does. I can get off with this vibe, but it takes a while, and I always reach a point where I’m like, “Seriously? I’m at the highest setting already?”

On the plus side, this vibe optionally pairs with the We-Connect app, so you can control and customize the vibrations more precisely than the toy’s buttons allow for. You can even use the app to create a mode much like my favorite setting on the Form 2, where the vibrations flicked back and forth quickly between the vibe’s two ears, feeling a little like a skilled lover’s tongue. Neat!

Unfortunately, it’s hard for me to take advantage of the Gala’s unique shape because the space between the ears is just slightly too small for my (average-sized) clit, especially as I get more turned on. I was explaining this problem to my boyfriend and said, “I can get it in there if I really kind of, like…” and he supplied, “Jam it in there?” which is exactly the right phrasing. I should not have to jam my genitals into a toy to make it work. It’s not painful, exactly – just slightly uncomfortable and annoying – but that’s enough to put me off using this toy most of the time. This could’ve been fixed by making the space between the ears slightly bigger or by making the ears more flexible. Better luck next time, We-Vibe.

FemmeFunn Ultra Bullet (available at Spectrum Boutique)

I tried this for the first time while on the phone with my boyfriend, and after listening to me using the FemmeFunn bullet and the Sensuelle Point bullet (see below), he correctly observed that I definitely prefer the FemmeFunn. (Dating attentive nerds is fun, y’all.)

I requested this vibe from Spectrum Boutique because my friend Bex had often mentioned it was a surprisingly strong and rumbly bullet for its price point. It’s half the price of the Tango and more-or-less matches it in strength and rumbliness, amazingly. Plus it’s cute as hell: I can’t resist anything turquoise and pink, try as I might.

I don’t like the way it charges: you have to jab the pointy end of a cable through a hole on the base of the toy and blindly hope you’re doing it right and aren’t breaking the toy. Can we do away with toys that charge this way, please, now that it’s 2018 and we have better technologies available to us?

This bullet’s slight flexibility makes it comfortable to use internally, if you don’t mind your penetrative objects being small. However, because the toy bends so easily, it’s also hard to put pressure on my clit with it, so if you like to press vibes into yourself, this might not be the best choice.

I still lean toward my Tango because the FemmeFunn’s squishy silicone makes it conduct vibration slightly less well than the Tango’s hard plastic, and because it’s much more annoying to scroll through the FemmeFunn’s 20 (!) settings than the Tango’s 8. But for its price and its size, this is a remarkably powerful and pleasurable vibe, and definitely my fave of the three highlighted in this post.

Sensuelle Point (available at Spectrum Boutique)

This is resoundingly my least favorite of the bunch, which surprised me, as I’d heard good things about it. It’s a simple, larger-than-standard-size bullet vibe, along the lines of the Tango or the VeDO Bam. However, it’s buzzier than either of those, slightly desensitizing both my clit and my hand after just a couple minutes.

The Point has 20 different speeds and patterns, but they don’t vary much in intensity, so I can’t get the boost in power I need once I’m getting close to orgasm. This toy feels too intense when I begin using it and not intense enough once I’ve been using it for a few minutes. Bummer.

That said, it’s a solidly constructed rechargeable at a reasonable price point ($55) and is made of smooth, luxurious, matte silicone that’s easy to clean. I’d still overall recommend you grab the cheaper-and-better FemmeFunn bullet instead, though, or spend a little more and get a Tango.

Thanks to We-Vibe and Spectrum Boutique for sending me these products to review!

Review: We-Vibe Sync

There comes a moment in any sex toy nerd’s life when they discover a non-standard use for a toy, and feel like a goddamn genius. Epiphora conjured hands-free orgasms with the Dusk; Bex first told me about putting an inside-out Tenga Egg over the head of a Hitachi for some added texture; and as for me, I’ve used the We-Vibe Sync for kink. (Hey, it even rhymes!)

How, you ask? Let me explain by first taking you back to a night sometime in late 2015. I’m pinned beneath my domly then-fuckbuddy in his big soft bed. He’s fucking me, and it feels fantastic, but without some clit stimulation, it’s not gonna get me anywhere. I snake my hand down between us to rub my clit, but he barks, “Did I say you could use your hand, little one?”

It’s true, he didn’t. And it’s frustrating for both of us that I have to use my hand: kinks-wise, I’d rather have my arms pinned over my head, and he’d prefer us in that pose, too. But without clit stim, orgasm is a sad impossibility for me. We eventually settle on a compromise: we squish my We-Vibe Tango between us, so it stays put beside my clit as he holds me down and fucks me. It works well enough – okay, it works great, and I come all over his cock, panting and mewling – but it’s a flawed system. Neither of us can easily or quickly adjust the vibration strength, and our pelvises have to remain perfectly flush to keep the vibe where it needs to stay.

Enter the We-Vibe Sync. It’s been over two years and I’m not seeing that fuckbuddy anymore, but other domly princes have come along, and the Sync has been there for us. It’s my hands-free solution to the problem of the princess who needs clit stim to come, but wants to feel hopelessly trapped beneath her darling.

The Sync boasts another feature ideal for kink: the app through which it can be controlled via Bluetooth. Whether you and your beau are oceans apart or they’re sitting beside you on the sofa, they can control your We-Vibe using their phone. The app allows you to manipulate several pre-programmed modes, raising or lowering the strength of the two individual motors with a swipe of a finger – or you can create your own modes, set the vibe to respond to the bassy thrum of music or sound, or use the “touch” mode to tap and swipe your partner into ecstasy.

The novelty factor of this app cannot be oversold. You can deny your partner clitoral stimulation while thrumming on their G-spot to tease them into a frenzy. You can rub your phone screen like you’d rub their actual clit, and coolly watch them squirm from across the room. You can send them a message in Morse code via vibration on their bits. The possibilities are infinite, and could be very, very evil, in the best possible way.

You could also – I suppose – use the Sync in the way We-Vibes are traditionally meant to be used: to provide extra stimulation during presumably-vanilla peen-in-vag sex. Its internal arm is more flared and textured than that on the Unite, so it stays in place better. And the Sync has two hinges between its internal and external arms, allowing you to adjust it to fit your body, unlike any other couples’ vibe in history. Amaze!

I find those hinges useful when I’m using the toy solo, too. Some days, my clit wants more pressure; some days, it wants less. I can widen or tighten the Sync’s angle to get the exact right amount of clit pressure at any given moment, and to make sure the clit arm actually stays on my clit. It’s genius.

Beware, though, that these hinges are prone to breaking if you drop the toy or pull it wider too harshly. I’ve worked at two different sex shops and the Sync floor models at both were broken by overzealous customers and/or salespeople by accident. When the hinges snapped, so, too, did the connection between the two arms’ motors – so not only did the toy flop uselessly like a deflated boner, but it also no longer vibrated in the internal arm. Be careful with your Sync!

Getting back to this toy’s good points, though, here’s the major thing that makes the Sync better than any other couples’ vibe on the market: DAT MOTOR. For years I’ve wondered why We-Vibe’s flagship toys’ motors were so weak and buzzy while their solo vibes were satisfyingly rumbly. Now, at long last, they’ve put a Tango-esque motor in a couples’ toy. The internal arm is still buzzy and kinda useless to me, but that clitoral arm is every bit as rumbly as I need it to be. It brings me to deep, satisfying orgasms, and doesn’t leave me numb.

Though the We-Connect app is designed for couples to use together, it can also be used alone. It acts as a remote control for the toy, and I like it a lot better than the actual remote the toy comes with. There is something so futuristic and cool about controlling my vibe from my phone. I don’t even have to take my pants down at any point; I can adjust the vibe’s position using my pelvic muscles and its vibrations with the app. Perfect for lazy orgasms at my desk, watching porn, reading erotica, or fantasizing.

Aside from the aforementioned fragile hinges, I only have a few quibbles about the Sync, and they are as follows. First off, the ridgy texture on the vaginal arm makes this toy impossible to clean without a small scrub brush (so, y’know, get a small scrub brush, or an old toothbrush). Secondly, if I’m using the Sync by myself, sometimes I get so wet that it starts to slide out of me and I have to continually readjust it. This isn’t nearly as much of an issue when a partner’s dick is in me, though. And thirdly, the internal arm’s motor is much weaker and buzzier than the one in the external arm. This only bugs me when I’m in the mood for strong G-spot stimulation, which isn’t often, but if you like your internal vibes robust and relentless, you might not be pleased with the Sync.

When I tell sex-nerd friends who haven’t tried the Sync that I’m reviewing it, they’re often disappointed or confused. “Don’t you hate couples’ vibes?” they say, perhaps flashing back to me screeching at the tangled panties of my FixSation, gnashing my teeth while mashing the remote of the We-Vibe 3, or throwing the Lelo Ida on my bedroom floor in an anguished rage.

It’s true that I’ve never loved a vibe of this style before. My former favorite from this category was the Lelo Noa, because it was the only one simultaneously unobtrusive enough not to bother my partner but strong and rumbly enough to get me off. But even that was not love – it was a paltry and resigned “like,” similar to how I’ll begrudgingly pick Wendy’s over McDonalds or Burger King if those are my only choices.

But I actually love the We-Vibe Sync. It does what a couples’ vibe should do: stays in place, doesn’t get in the way or interrupt the proceedings, and gets me off – whether I’m being fucked by a vanilla darling or a darkly dominant beau.

 

The We-Vibe Sync is available at Come As You Are ($237 CAD/about $180 USD), SheVibe ($199 USD), Peepshow ($199 USD), or from We-Vibe direct ($249 CAD).

Review: Sistalk Doctor Whale

Friends keep asking me what the deal is with the little stuffed cyclops-whale displayed in my room. “It came with a Kegel toy I’m reviewing soon,” I always say, which is a strange sentence. #SexToyReviewerLyfe, amirite?

Sistalk recently sent me their Doctor Whale vibrating Kegel exerciser – and that accompanying Doctor Whale stuffed animal. (I don’t know what he’s a doctor of, nor where he got his medical degree.) It’s a cool idea: an insertable vibrator equipped with pressure sensors, so it can vibrate your G-spot pleasurably while also guiding you through a Kegel exercise regimen and sensing how well you’re doing on your workout. The toy is controllable via an app called Monster Pub, which is also where you can set up and track your Kegel exercises. You can use Sistalk toys as regular wearable vibrators as well, controlling their vibrations via the app.

Sistalk designed this product well in some ways: its silicone is smooth and soft, it’s easy to insert, and it’s comfortable to use. The whale’s tail sits against my clit but doesn’t really vibrate it, so I’ll never have an orgasm from this toy alone, but that isn’t really its aim. The whale’s body is big enough that I can feel it when I squeeze around it, but not so big that it’s uncomfortable. To my surprise, the motor is quite good: rumbly and strong enough to please my fickle G-spot. Physically, the toy is well-thought-out.

But problems arise once you get into the Bluetooth connectivity and app-controllability. The connection between the toy and my phone is always tenuous at best, usually disconnecting after a couple minutes if not sooner. Other reviewers have experienced this issue too so I know it’s not a fluke with my particular toy. Needless to say, it’s hard to focus on a Kegel exercise routine when you’re concerned the vibe will disconnect at any moment, which it inevitably does.

The app itself is too busy, bursting with options. I’ve dated enough app developers to be able to hear their tut-tutting in my head as I flip through this app’s overburdened menus and screens. There’s also a language barrier which makes many of its instructions confusing or downright hilarious (I’m still gigglin’ about the Kegel exercise narrator telling me to squeeze my “vageena” tighter).

I think this line of toys has a lot of potential; the designers just need to fix the connectivity issues, tighten up the app, and maybe construct a more stimulating tail for this li’l whale. Until then, I recommend the We-Vibe Sync if you’re looking for an app-controllable vibrator, and a good old-fashioned pair of Kegel balls if you want to work on your pelvic musculature. Hopefully Sistalk works out the kinks with their products so lots of folks can enjoy these adorable, health-promoting monsters!

 

This review was sponsored, and as always, all writing and opinions are my own.