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Review: Fun Factory Bouncer (+ a giveaway!)

Kate Sloan

The Fun Factory Bouncer is the type of toy that’s like catnip for seasoned sex toy reviewers like me, because… it actually does something markedly different than other toys in its category. And since the category in this case is “dildo,” that’s even more impressive. When overhauling a vibrator, you can tweak the material, motor strength and quality, motor location, control panel, and shape/size/design… but with dildos, your options for originality are much more limited.

So what did Fun Factory do? They took a fairly standard-looking silicone dildo and created 3 hollow spaces inside it, and in each of those spaces, they placed a weighted ball that rolls around as you move the toy – just like the kind you’d find if you cracked open a set of Kegel beads. Innnteresting!

The result is a dildo that looks unremarkable from the outside (albeit peppy and bright, as most Fun Factory designs do) but feels completely different in your hands – or your vagina or your ass – than any dildo you’ve ever felt before. Unlike Kegel balls, which tend to stay pretty stationary once inserted, a dildo is meant to be thrusted – so even if you’ve experienced this style of Kegel toy before, this dildo is likely to feel quite different. The weighted balls roll around in their little nooks with every thrust, creating a sensation that’s sort of like low-level motion-activated vibration. It also reminds me of that delicious feeling you get when a partner’s fucking you so hard that their balls slap against your vulva/butt/thighs – except in this case, that little extra “oomph” happens inside you instead. Neat!

The rumbling gets a bit muted when my vaginal muscles clamp down on the toy, and I have to admit I found this disappointing at first. The physics of it don’t even really make sense to me. But once I realized this was happening, it became almost like a fun sexual mindfulness game… If I noticed that the toy was feeling less impactful all of a sudden, it usually meant I was clenching my PC muscles, and could function as a nice reminder to relax, let go, and let the sensations wash over me instead of trying to eke out a speedy orgasm. (The late great masturbation expert Betty Dodson – rest in peace, you brilliant problematic fave – often recommended orgasming this way; she called it the “rock ‘n’ roll” method and insisted it produced bigger, better climaxes than most people’s go-to, the “tension” method. Something to think about!)

The Bouncer is well-designed for both solo play and partnered encounters, with its sturdy-but-squishy triangular base that you can grab between your fingers or gently punch with your fist (the internal balls roll around a lot more when you thrust hard and fast, so go wild!). There’s a strong suction cup on the bottom, though I think you’d barely reap the full benefits of the toy’s unique rumbles if you were bouncing up and down on this dildo while it was affixed to the floor or a wall. It can also easily be slipped into a harness for strap-on play, a notion that excited me and my partner from the jump.

While we both enjoyed the Bouncer a lot whether they were fucking me with it by hand or strapped into our RodeoH harness, my partner observed that in both situations, this dildo takes more energy, strength, and stamina to thrust for an entire session than a standard dildo would – at least, if you want to actually feel the signature rumbling it produces. Slower, more sensual thrusting tends to produce minimal – if any – ball-rolling inside the toy, so you really have to put some elbow grease into your thrusts if you want to experience the full range of sensations this toy has to offer. While this was perfectly doable in 10-to-20-minute bursts for my able-bodied partner, I think this might be a tricky toy for you to use to its full potential if you have chronic pain, muscle strength issues, fatigue, etc. This is the main reason I probably won’t reach for this toy very often during solo play, but will likely still hand to my partner once in a while for a thorough, resounding fuck.

It helps that the shape and size of this dildo are pretty perf for my body. It has 7″ of insertable length and a solid 1.57″ diameter – big enough to feel satisfyingly full but not so big as to require lots of warm-up. The gentle undulation of the shaft shape feels really good when thrusted in and out, swelling against my spots on every stroke. This dildo can target the G-spot and feels great that way, but that spot tends to crave a hard, fast pounding that’s difficult to achieve with a draggy silicone toy like this, even when it’s slathered in lots of lube – so I prefer to use it deeper, on my A-spot, where slower and more purposeful thrusts are appreciated. I do sometimes wish it were a little longer, particularly during strap-on play when it loses about an inch to the harness, but with careful angling, it can hit any spot inside me that a longer toy can.

I appreciate that Fun Factory knew this toy was already quirky AF inside and didn’t need to look quirky, too. They enclosed those show-stopping weighted balls inside a fairly basic, uncontroversial dildo that many people should be able to enjoy, which I think was the right call. As long as you can handle the size, this dildo will likely feel good-but-not-great in your vag or your butt (and yes, it is anal-safe!). Being mouth-fucked with it would also be an interesting sensation…

The Fun Factory Bouncer is a bit of a diva, in that it works best when you’re thrusting hard, relaxing your pelvic muscles, and maintaining rhythmic momentum – which is a lot to be aware of at once. But if you’re up for that amount of labor, by yourself or with a partner, I think this is a really fun and special toy that is truly unmatched on the current market. It has bounced, jiggled, rumbled, and rocked-‘n’-rolled its way right into my heart (and my vagina)!

 

Thanks to the good folks at SXY.co.uk for providing me with this toy and sponsoring this review! (As always, all writing and opinions are my own.) They have also offered up a Bouncer for one lucky reader in the UK or Ireland – here’s how to enter:

  1. Follow @sxy_uk on Instagram
  2. Follow me (@girly_juice) on Instagram
  3. Leave a comment on this Instagram post of mine answering the question “What would your dream dildo be like?” and tagging a friend

Please note that you must be 18+ and live in the UK or Ireland to win. I’ll pick a winner after one week. Good luck, babes!

5 Natural Ways to Reignite Your Libido

Kate Sloan

It’s been quite a week, to say the least. And quite a month. And quite a year.

While there has been an occasional piece of good news amongst the bad (Joe! Kamala! All the wonderful trans and BIPOC candidates who won senate seats! Steve Kornacki finally getting to pack up his map and go get some sleep!), obviously overall it has been a rough time to be a human. That’s part of why, in my sex educator communities, there has been so much discussion this year of how (or whether!) to try to reignite your libido in such tumultuous times.

This is a fairly new problem for me, and I know I’m lucky in that way. Traditionally my libido hasn’t ebbed, but has instead flowed, during times of high stress. If that’s your experience too, please know that there’s nothing wrong with it – it can be more difficult to navigate when you’re in a relationship with someone whose stress affects them in the opposite way, but it’s still fine!

It’s also 100% fine if you don’t want to revive your libido right now – either because there’s too much other stuff to do (our work is not over and there’s still a lot that can be done to support, for example, Democrats in the Georgia runoff elections), or because you just don’t have the energy at the moment (FAIR!), or because you just plain don’t feel sexy while fascism is flaring.

This post, however, is for people whose sexual desire has waned, and who want to do something about that. Sex and masturbation can be almost medicinal for me in stressful times, giving me much-needed bursts of happy neurotransmitters, affirmation of my desirability and desirousness, or even just helping me sleep. So here are some tips you can try if you’re missing sex – or just missing the sensation of wanting sex – and want to give your libido a gentle boost.

 

Try something new sexually. It doesn’t even really matter what it is. A magnificent new vibrator or clitoral sucker. A kink scene involving hot wax or E-stim. Even just a new position. Many sex and relationships experts point to the hit of happy chemicals your brain produces when you try a new and exciting thing, regardless of whether the thing itself ends up becoming a new fave of yours or not. This is a really easy way to put the spring back in your step sexually.

Not sure where to start? Take a BDSM quiz online (with a partner or alone), fill out a Yes/No/Maybe list, peruse sex toy reviews written by people you trust (hiii), or just ask your perviest friend what their latest sexual fascination is!

 

Seek out new sexual stimuli. I know it’s not always the most fun thing to scroll through porn sites or flip through erotica books when sex feels unappealing, but it’s gotta be better than sitting around feeling sad about your magically disappearing libido, right?

Set aside some time on a regular basis to explore new things in your sexual medium of choice, whether that be hardcore kinky porn, soft tender fanfiction, group sex erotica, or literally whatever. Maybe it’ll be unbelievably hot and get you all riled up; maybe it’ll just make you laugh or teach you more about human sexuality. Either way, it’ll give your brain and genitals something new to ponder. (Don’t forget to pay for your porn, please! Supporting sex workers is hot.)

 

Drugs ‘n’ supplements. (Big congrats to all the states that recently legalized weed, medicinal shrooms, etc.!) These are not an option for everyone, of course, whether it be due to their own personal views on drugs, or something more logistical like an incompatibility with crucial medications they’re already on. There’s also the question of how drugs may affect one’s ability to consent – which is why I suggest negotiating the components of an upcoming sexual encounter while still sober, deciding on safewords that are easy to say, and checking in regularly.

I’ve always found that smoking or vaping marijuana enhances my arousal and pleasure, in part because it reduces the volume of my depressed and anxious thoughts. Some of my friends have had similar experiences with shrooms, hashish, and various other trippy goodies. You could also look into natural libido supplements, such as HerSolution, which contains bloodflow-boosting niacin, orgasm-intensifying cayenne, and various other herbals, nutrients, and alleged aphrodisiacs. (Be sure to check with your doctor before adding anything new to your medication regimen, especially if you have preexisting conditions!)

 

Cultivate a new crush. I often return to this strategy when I’m depressed because I know how motivating and uplifting a juicy crush can be for me. Maybe you’re still fantasizing about the map guys from election week and want to go read some John King fanfiction. Maybe that person you follow on Twitter for their hilarious political jokes would be open to a flirty DM (tread carefully and respectfully!). Maybe you just want to re-watch a beloved old TV show and obsess over the will-they-won’t-they dynamic between your favorite characters.

However you choose to manifest it, I believe that (for those of us who are alloromantic, i.e. capable of experiencing romantic attraction) crushy energy can be heart-healing and world-widening. This is true even if (and perhaps especially if) nothing ever comes of the crush. Just like meditation is more about the bliss of the journey than it is about the one-time attainment of enlightenment, having a crush can be more about the invigorating almostness of it than it is about actually pursuing the person/people you have your eye on. And yeah, sometimes that can lead to an uptick in sexy feelings, too.

 

Make time and space for yourself to feel sexy. This one is so important, and unfortunately our overstuffed days under capitalism don’t often allow for it. But study after study has shown that stress inhibits sexual desire, and so in many cases your best bet in fighting libido troubles is to eliminate the stressors in your life that can be eliminated, whenever possible, and create little stress-free zones within your day/week/life.

This might mean rearranging your work week so that you have 3 hours open on a Tuesday night to read erotica in a hot bath by candlelight. It might mean asking your spouse to watch the kids for an evening so you can try out your new sex toy. It might mean addressing that lingering health issue that’s been making you feel super gross/ugly but that you haven’t had the time or energy to deal with. It might mean doing your hair and makeup, slipping into some lingerie, and taking some sensuous selfies so you can get some sweet sweet dopamine hits from your thirsty followers’ likes and retweets. It might mean clearing your schedule to watch a sexy ’90s thriller while munching popcorn with your sweetheart and then seeing where the night takes you.

The point is, you can’t expect yourself to just randomly feel sexy if all the circumstances of your life are conspiring to keep you focused on more pressing but less fun things. Sex may be “play” but it doesn’t have to be an afterthought if it’s important to you; you can choose to make it a priority, to treat it as an ironclad commitment on your calendar, to leave the proverbial door open so your desire can pay you a visit.

 

What has helped you most when you’ve had a prolonged dip in your sexual desire?

 

Thanks to HerSolution for sponsoring this post! As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Using the Bestvibe Mermaid As a Chastity Device

Kate Sloan

A key skill to develop when you’re a sex toy reviewer is turning bad toys into useable products. Almost every sex toy has more than one possible way of using it (and if it doesn’t, it had better be damn good at the one thing it does do), and finding offbeat ways to repurpose sex toys for pleasure is always, at the very least, interesting.

The most common manifestation of this in my sex life has been shitty vibrators with good shapes. Some vibes – like the original Lelo Mona and Mona Wave – have a shape so good that it transcends their disappointing motor. If a toy is curved just right to hit your spots, you may not even need to turn on the vibrations to enjoy it (albeit perhaps while paired with another toy).

And so it is with the Bestvibe Mermaid (my shortened version of the full title as per the product page, “Tongue Mermaid Remote Sex Toys 9 Modes Wearable Vibrators”). When I unplugged it from its first charging session and turned it on, I sighed and said aloud, “Oh nooo,” because the motor is wildly, offensively buzzy. “I can’t use this,” I thought. But then I examined its shape again and thought… Wait. Yes I can.

I’ve been delving into chastity play with my partner as of late – listen to this recent Dildorks episode for more on that – and in talking about this online, I’ve received a slew of questions from readers/listeners/friends. One of the most common questions I’ve gotten is “Do you know anything about chastity for vulvas?” My partner, an intrepid researcher as ever, suggests the chastity belts made by Neosteel and Fancy Steel, but unfortunately, good-quality products in this category tend to be prohibitively expensive. It’s no wonder some vulva-owning chastity kinksters turn to makeshift options like leather belts and Scotch tape (!!) in lieu of shelling out for a specially-made device.

The terrifying tongues of the Mermaid

Here’s the thing: I think the Bestvibe Mermaid could be a decent “chastity-lite” product for someone who’s curious about the kink and just wants to try it out, someone who fetishizes chastity psychologically but doesn’t need the whole physical kit and caboodle, or someone who simply can’t afford a proper chastity belt yet but wants to approximate the experience as best they can. The Mermaid has three arms (or, as the product copy calls them, “urgent antennae”) – a G-spot-targeting vaginal arm, a tiny flexible anal arm, and a bizarre clitoral simulator made to look like three little tongues. At only $45.99, it’s probably one of the most cost-effective ways to get both your holes simultaneously stuffed with body-safe materials.

Some important caveats before we proceed: It isn’t good for your vagina to wear anything inside it for more than about 8 hours at a time, tops (which is why, for example, that’s usually the max number of hours recommended for leaving in a menstrual cup before you take it out and wash it off). The vagina is self-cleaning, and long-term vaginal obstructions prevent that process from happening and can lead to infections. I’d vehemently recommend that you not wear this as a day-in-day-out chastity device, even if you wash it every time you take it out to use the bathroom. It’s more of a once-in-a-while thing, so if that’s the only kind of chastity you want to do, maybe this would work.

Inserting this toy is a bit of a “Who’s on first?” situation. I kept inserting one arm and then finding I couldn’t get the other one in, and then reversing them, all while they slipped every which way under my lubey fingers. After much experimentation, I think the easiest way to do it is to insert the vaginal arm and then the anal arm; the latter is more flexible and thus more easily manoeuvred while the other arm is inside you. It’s kind of a slippery fucker because of its bendiness, but on the bright side, it’s comfier than something super firm would be, especially while walking around. The clitoral portion barely makes contact with my clit, because it barely reaches it – par for the course with many dual-stim (or in this case, triple-stim) toys, unfortunately. Depending on your anatomy and your chastity goals, you may want some kind of additional measure in place to block clitoral access when using this toy for that purpose.

This toy is a good balance of comfortable vs. noticeable; you definitely know you’re wearing it the entire time you’re wearing it, but it stays anchored in place well while I’m walking around (provided I’m wearing close-fitting underwear), and doesn’t typically get painful or uncomfortable unless I need to re-lube it.

The vibrations are the saddest part of the toy. They’re just so bad. They’re buzzy and frustrating and weak. But if you’re using this toy for chastity, that becomes a feature instead of a bug. Wearing this toy with the vibrations turned on for any length of time will likely result in some (temporary) genital numbness, perhaps further adding to your sense of being denied pleasure and orgasms. (I know that’s putting a “Look on the bright side!” spin on a legitimate problem, but y’know, I’ve always been an “ass half-full” kind of gal.)

This toy comes with a remote, which would be a cool feature for D/s play because your partner could randomly turn the toy on and off while you were, say, out on a dinner date. However, the instructions are inscrutable so I wasn’t able to test this. Ditto with the HEATING feature that apparently can only be enabled via the remote.

All in all, while the Bestvibe Mermaid lacks a lot of key things that would make it useable as the vibrator it purports to be (such as a decent motor or a comprehensible instruction manual), there are worse things you could shove in your holes if you’re looking to plug ’em up for a chastity scene. I can’t say I’ll be reaching for this one a lot, as chastity and orgasm denial aren’t kinks of mine (at least not as a bottom), but hey, I’m glad it exists. Go forth and obstruct your orifices if you so desire, my kinky friends.

 

Thanks to Bestvibe for sending me this product to review! This post was sponsored, meaning I was paid to write a fair and honest review of this toy. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

Review: Laid D2

Kate Sloan

I was on the phone with a friend when the Laid D2 dildo arrived on my doorstep. “Should I open it now?” I asked him.

“Yes!” my friend said, so I did. I gasped. I oohed and aahed. I held it up to the light and said, “It’s so smooth and heavy and shiny!!” I could not contain my delight, even knowing that the person on the other end of the phone line had not asked for a play-by-play. Luckily, he was just amused.

I’ve eyed this dildo from afar for years, but was never quite intrigued enough to request it from a sex toy retailer before. Although it is made of smooth black granite (SWOON), its shape is very similar to those of the We-Vibe Rave and Lelo Ella, so I kinda felt like… been there, fucked that. But I shouldn’t have written it off, because in use it’s actually pretty different from those toys.

The main difference, of course, is the material. I cannot overstate how sexy this toy feels in my hand. It’s hefty and weighty – not quite so much as steel, but certainly more than silicone – and it feels naturally cold to the touch, like metal. The smoothness also makes it feel altogether different from a silicone toy; it can glide against your G-spot rather than roughly rubbing past it (which silicone sometimes seems to do even when adequately lubricated), and it doesn’t require as much lube as some other toys do because of the frictionlessness of the surface.

It’s also just beautiful. It retails for less than a lot of other “luxury” dildos – on KissKiss.ch, it goes for 98.90 Swiss francs, which is about $106 American or $143 Canadian – but still definitely feels luxurious. In fact, I’m sort of gobsmacked you can get a hand-crafted dildo of this quality for that price. I think this would make a great gift for a sweetheart you’re trying to impress, provided they’ve expressed interest in owning a dildo for vaginal penetration (the D2 is not anal-safe). You can tell them it’s a toy made of 500-million-year-old granite, because apparently it is.

The D2 has two ends, both of which are insertable – but the flattened head on one side is really the star of the show. It’s optimized for G-spot stimulation. Just like the Lelo Ella, the D2 makes it easy to hone in on your spot and rock against it – but unlike the Ella, its neck has no give whatsoever, so you don’t even have to push that hard to elicit intense sensations. I like a flattened head better for my G-spot than a smaller or pointier tip; stimulation that’s too intense or direct on that spot can overwhelm me and may even be painful, especially when I’m not warmed up. The D2’s wide head (a little over 1.5″ in diameter at its widest) lets you spread out the pressure over a bigger area, so your whole G-spot gets massaged, rather than just one area getting poked. That said, the bigness of the head also means some people may have trouble getting it past their pubic bone comfortably, or inserting it at all.

The most astonishing thing to me about this toy is the extent to which it makes me squirt. The first time I used it, I was squirting so continuously that I almost didn’t notice it at first; it was a constant, low-level gushing, rather than a big, climactic ejaculation. It’s also remarkable that this toy makes me squirt so much without often creating that painful/uncomfortable “need to pee” feeling that more pinpointed G-spot toys often do. All I have to do is ride the gentle wave of pleasure, and before I know it, I’ll have soaked through my sheets. (Lay a towel down before using this toy!)

The D2 has an asymmetrical shape that’s supposed to enable you to gently rotate/rock it against your G-spot rather than thrusting in and out, but I don’t find this terribly effectual once I get past a certain level of arousal. Teasing my spot is fine for early in a session, but as I get more and more turned on, I tend to want more pressure and speed. The D2 can be thrust in and out, but it’s awkward: the handle gets slippery easily and is tricky to grip and angle right (especially for my sore hands). I end up changing my hand position several times throughout any given session with this toy, because its handle just isn’t very comfortable or useful.

However, that same handle can also be inserted. “Won’t that be pokey/stabby?” a friend asked when I mentioned this, because the straight side of the D2 does indeed taper pretty sharply at its very end. In use, though, it doesn’t bother me at all, and can actually reach my A-spot very effectively. The combination of the slim tip, hard material, and easy angleability (that’s a word, right?) of this end of the toy makes it feel like I’m really getting fucked when I use it this way. It feels almost as impactful as heftier A-spot-friendly toys like the Njoy Eleven. Blessedly, this side is easier to thrust with, because holding onto the flattened G-spot end gives you a lot of leverage and a secure grip.

This toy, I have to say, is pretty blissful. It’s a gentle G-spot jubilator, an awesome A-spot annihilator, and a gorgeous granite gift. If there’s someone in your life who likes firm stimulation of either or both of those spots, and deserves to have their vagina totally spoiled with pleasure and beauty, get them a Laid D2 – even if that person is you!

 

Thanks so much to KissKiss.ch for sending me this product to review – they’re a Switzerland-based sex shop with a killer section of luxury sex toys! This post was sponsored, which means I was paid to write a fair and honest review of the toy. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.

5 Fun Things You Can Do With a Penis Pump

Kate Sloan
Pictured: the Max Width Penis Enlarger.

I only worked in sex toy retail for a few months, but I can’t even tell you the number of people who came in searching for penis enlargement products. In fact, it was explicitly part of my training to learn which products actually work on a long-term basis (answer: almost none of them) and which are basically bullshit – although, of course, being in retail, we wouldn’t have phrased it quite like that!

Penis pumps, I have learned, are somewhere in the middle of that spectrum – they offer some temporary enlargement by way of suction encouraging bloodflow to your dick, but that’s not their main or most effectual purpose. Penis pump results are usually more about engorgement, arousal, and pleasure than they are about size – and if you use them with that expectation held firmly (heh) in your mind, I think you’ll have a much better time with them. (Just make sure to read about the risks of using them, and maybe even discuss ’em with your doctor before you do, okay?)

To get you started, here are 5 ways to play with penis pumps in your sex/kink life…

 

Size play. I know I just said these pumps do other things much better than they do enlargement… BUT… they do create a temporary and usually minor enlargement of the penis that can be really thrilling, especially if you in any way fetishize “big dicks,” “monster cocks,” “raging boners,” and so on. (I mean, in our phallus-obsessed culture, it’s hard not to have internalized some of these ideas of hotness, even if you’ve later learned to reject them for the body-shaming beliefs that underlie them.) Whether the dick being pumped up into immensity is a partner’s or your own, it may be exciting to see it become bigger, veinier, and more intimidating for a few minutes. It might even change the penis-wielder’s sense of self (and/or their partner’s sense of them) enough that they’ll feel inspired to do some kind of roleplay scene that takes advantage of their newfound cartoonish hugeness.

Press a vibrator against it. I saw someone do this in a porn clip recently and now I can’t stop thinking about it… The combination of suction and vibration can be terrifically overwhelming, and if the chap in the video I saw is anything to go by, it seems like trying to wring an orgasm out of this method would be a long, slow, teasing process, potentially resulting in a climax half-ruined by the indirectness of the stimulation. If you’re into that, hey, I’m not gonna stop you.

Chastity/denial. It’s amazing to me that I’ve read so many screeds over the years about how “blue balls” are so painful that those tormented by this sensation should be given sex out of pity (oh, boohoo, Chad, go jerk off like an adult), given that there are tons of people who enjoy and actually seek out that sensation. Not just blue balls, either, but sometimes the overall sense of intense arousal with no resolution in sight. I think it would be especially cruel to take someone out of chastity for the first time in days or weeks, shove their dick into a penis pump, use it to crank up their arousal, and then… not let them come. Back into the chastity cage you shall go! (Just as soon as your boner deflates, that is… which, let’s face it, could take a while…)

Put on a show. Most penis pumps are transparent or translucent, making them the perfect prop for an exhibitionist moment. This could be particularly useful if, due to current global circumstances, you find yourself separated from the person/people you love to fuck. I have found few long-distance sexual experiences more intimate and bonding than watching my partner try out a totally new-to-them sex toy in front of their webcam for my viewing pleasure.

Medical play. If I’m into the fantasy of a Victorian-era doctor administering clitoral stimulation by hand in order to cure me of hysteria, I have to assume there are people with penises out there who relish the thought of a sexy doctor pumping up their dick to address erectile dysfunction. As a roleplay, this could be a small penis humiliation scene if you’re into that, packed with devastating jibes about your dick’s inability to function – or it could be an ASMR-style calming experience involving focused attention and caring concern. Sounds great either way to me!

What crafty ideas come up for you when you contemplate adding a penis pump into your kinky repertoire?

 

This post contains a sponsored link. As always, all writing and opinions are my own.